Crashed Into You
by DesertOrDisaster
Summary: Bella leaves Forks and lives on her own. She doesn't want love at all.. but what she'll find is what she was needing her whole life. - First fanfic.
1. So It Begins

*** This is my First Fanfiction, I do have several things that will happen so bare with me and leave reviews..

***It is A JASPER+BELLA also does come with LEMONS and mature language so if these offend you in any way. I'm Sorry

**BPOV**

The sun beams through the window, I turn over, shit- bad idea. My eyes instantly burn from the beaming rays of light. Then it hit me.. Friday..

Work. Oh shit. Work.

I turn over on my left side, my clock reads 8:20. Great, I have excatly 40 mintues to shower, get dressed and get to work. Stupid alarm clock.

Running into the shower, I wash my face, I wash my hair quickly using my strawberry shampoo. Then, as the hot water is rinsing the shampoo out, I grab my toothbrush and paste and violently brush my teeth. Anything, to save time.

I dry myself off quickly, brushing my hair quickly and throwing it up- then putting my brush into my bag along with some mascara and some lip chap. I find some jeans, wow- they are really snug.

I have to try and go shopping, I got so used to Alice dragging me… ahh Alice, what I wouldn't give to have you shop for me right now…

I grabbed a blue blouse and ran out of my room, grabbing my bag, and speeding down the 2 flights of stairs.. Grabbing the key off the rack near the door and stupidly banging my wrist against the handle of my door. Fuck, I really need to be more careful. I yank on my door, slamming it shut and locking it quickly.

I run down the stairs (4 flights) Fuck the elevator at this time in the morning. I head down the street for 2 blocks and get into the subway terminal.

*15 mintues later/25 mintues to get to work*

Wow, waiting for this stupid train is driving me nuts. I decide to pull out a mirror and put on some mascara, finally.. I feel a little bit better.

Although, I never thought in 3 years I'd be at this point. From Forks to here.. Trying to get to my dead-end job. Don't get me wrong, I love the job, it reminds me I'm a normal working person, not just some kid with all the money in the world.

That brings me to the Cullens. After everything ended between Edward and I, the one thing I was so thankful to never have to deal with again was THE money. I hated it, it further threw the both of us out of balance. Its fine. Since what happened. I never needed anyone. I was fine on my own, never cared about being with someone else being someone's someone else. At the end of the day I could always count on myself.

Where is this stupid train? Looking at my watch I had exactly 20 minutes to get to work.

*Whosh*

Finally the stupid train is here, stepping on, I decide to use the frame of the door to hold me up. Instead of touching the poles or sitting down, what was the point of being sandwiched in by other people? After about 10 minutes, my stop finally came, thank god I stuck close to the door- I get off without any difficultly. I quickly run up the stairs and head up to the street level.

UGH! Great this is where I hit the ground, stead two strong arms wrap around me and steady my footing.

"**Sorry darlin', didn't mean to nearly knock you off your feet" **a sweet southern voice rattles my already heavy beating heart.

I had to look up- and what I saw, I felt like I was dead.

He had wavy blond hair that almost fell into his eyes, a slender but defined nose, plum lips - wow would it would be like to run my tounge on those lips.. Mmm… I saved the eyes for last. They were light ice blue. Sort of like looking out on an ocean on a bright sunny day… realizing that he said something..

I was finding myself lost in his breathtaking eyes…. **"Uhhh.. that's okay, thanks for not letting me hit the ground**" I tried to sound calm but my body and mind were freaking out.

"**Well, sweetheart, what kind of gentleman would I be if I let a pretty li' lady hit the ground?" **he replied back with a sexy crooked smile.

Oh my, someone please tell me why I had to rush to work! Ugh, could I not just take him back home and have my way with him? Actually, fuck my place… I'd ride him senseless while his southern drawl is moaning my name. mmm..

"**I guess not a nice gentleman.. Well um, thanks for saving me from some pain.. But I have to get to work, Thanks again" **I smiled and quickly withdrew from the beautiful southern man before me and had to focus again on rushing to work.

I walk the 5 blocks quickly and make it to work with 2 mintues to spare. Taking the Ally and heading in through the back rather then the front.

"**Hey Mike, you sweating back here yet?" **I yell as I walk through the kitchen and make my way to the bathroom.

"**Not until your beautiful self starts serving some customers, Bee.. " **Mike shouts back and chuckles at me.

I start my shift like everyday, throw my hair up, clock in, throw on a my pouch, grab my pen, a pad and throw on a nice welcoming smile and start serving customers and at 9 AM theres not too many of them. So I decide to start my daily bug the cook routine.

"**Hey Mike- how'd the weekend go without me?" **I ask trying to open up some conversation, he gets so wrapped up in cooking that he forgets how to communicate with an actual human bein

g.

"**It was alright Bee, just wish you didn't back out on us" **he replies back.

"**Yeah well, I needed a weekend off. You know you guys drain the life out of me" **I laugh at him.

"**Right, more like you drain us. Do you know I had to walk Ben and Tyler home real drunk without you? Tyler wouldn't stop his fucking moaning about you. Kept saying he had to stick around at the bar 'til you showed up, hes a fucking panzy." **He says.

"**Aww, poor Tyler. He actually thought I'd show? Even though I said I wasn't going? That's your fault you had to walk them home, you always let them get too damn drunk." **I inform him.

"**Yeah well, you usually set us all on the right path. You better be out this weekend you know. Anyways, get out there… customer. " **He then switched from Mike my buddy to Mike the cook.

I look at my watch, yup 11 Am finally some time to actually do some work instead of just coffee runs.

I head out to the front of the restaurant, and notice 2 tables occupied. One with 4 men on the left and just 1 man on the right. I grab 5 menus and 2 drink menus. I decide to hand guy alone a menu and a drink menu.

"**Good morning. I'm Bella, I'll be your waitress this morning, here is a menu and a drink menu for you. I'll give you a moment to order." **I warmly introduce myself to the lone man.

"**Why thank you darlin', while I think about what food to order, I'd like a coffee, that way you don't have to make too many trips to me." **

... review away!...


	2. Meet Me

I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT OR THESE CHARATERS.

A southern voice shocks me - I heard that voice this morning.

He lifts his head and damn, it is the man from this morning.

"**Alright sir, how would you like it?" **I asked - trying not to blush.

"**Darlin', I'll take it however you like it." **heanswers back in a husky voice.

"**I'm sorry..?" **what the fuck, seriously did he just say what I think he said?**"Just black with two sugars darlin'" **he answered

Ah shit. Okay stop thinking shit, Bella just get the damn coffee.

"**Good morning gentleman, My name is Bella and I'll be your waitress today. Here are some menus and our drink menu, let me know when you'd like to order." **and with that I turned on my heel and headed to the lone man's table, ignoring the wolf whistles.

I walk away from the table- headed over to the counter.. Refill my coffee pot and grab two sugar packets and head back over to the beautiful man's table and pour his coffee.

"**Bella, I'll just have a burger with fries, do you have any chipotle sauce?" **The sexy voice said

"**Yes we do, would you like it on the side?" **I replied

"**Yes darlin' I would thank you." **he looked up with that sexy crooked smile.

"**Hey, um .. Bella?.. Waitress?" **a guy yells to me

I head over to the table.

Thankfully, none of them give me a hard time by trying to flirt with cheesy lines. Until I come across the last guy sitting on the outside of the booth seated table.

"**So what would you recommend Belllaa" **he tries to say in a sexy voice.

Ew, he tried to make my name sexy, ew, that's just gross.** "Well, the hamburger with onion rings and a garden salad is a pretty good meal." **I try to answer like he didn't even try to flirt.

"**Alright, so I'll have that.. A coffee 3 creams 3 sugars, orange juice please and your phone number to give you a good time" **he replies. And winks.

Ew, that's just gross. And I'm working, what a douche.

I was just about to open my mouth with that southern gentleman came from behind me and wrapped his arm around my waist.

"**I know your trying to be slick and all dude, but that's my fiancée your trying to get into and I'd appreciate it if you'd stop because I'm 7 feet away enjoying my coffee trying to enjoy gorgeous darlin ass work. And you are just making that horrible for me." **He said sternly.

I look at him as lovingly as possible, trying to make it look as if we are in fact in love. And kiss his neck, I'm pretty sure I felt him purr.. He looks down at me with that crooked sexy smile.. oh Fuck that's so sexy.

"**Sorry man, she isnt wearing a ring so I thought she was fair game- let me make it up to you. Meals on me and an open invitation to join us?" **Douchebag said.**"Shes working, you think she wants grease on her ring? As long as your paying and my darlin' fiancee is no longer a object on your hit list, alright? Jasper" **he extends his hand.

"**Jasper Nice man, thought you'd break my jaw. I'm Dale, this is Mark, Tom and James" **He introduces the table.

"**Man, I would have but never when a lady could get hurt" **he winks to me.

"**I'll move another table for you guys." **I said to the guys

"**No, darlin' you are going to be on your feet all day, let me move the table and you just worry your pretty head about our order, alright?" **he looks at me lovingly and here I am getting lost in his stupid eyes again.

I nod and smile to him and then I head off to the kitchen, yell to mike the orders and draw up the coffees and orange juice for the table.

After setting down the drinks. I clean off the table that Jasper was sitting at and head to the kitchen getting the feeling that someone is burning a hole into me.

"**Hey Mike, hows the orders coming?" **I ask.

"**Its alright, hey you okay Bee? I heard something out there but I wasn't sure if I should come out acting like my dad or something.. " **he chuckles.

"**No, No. Another customer saved me, a guy from this morning" **I said quietly.

"**What? What happened this morning Bee?" **he sounded concerned.

"**Mike, its okay. I just bumped into a guy while rushing here and he caught me before I hit the ground, apologized for running into me and then I came here." **I explained**.**

"**Wow talk about weird, that hes here now. Are you sure hes not a stalker?" **He asked.

"**I don't think so. Don't worry Mike, I can kick his ass if I need to" **I Said

"**Alright girl- your orders are ready. I'll set them in the front for you, so get going babe**" He ordered.

"**Fine Mike" **I grabbed three plates and headed out to the table.

"**Hello gentleman, here's your order. Lets see.." **I start rambling off the orders..

"**a morning everything special with home fries," **passing it to a guy on the inside of the booth..

"**belt sandwich with home fries" **passing the dish to the guy beside him.

"**cheeseburger with home fries" **passing it to the guy beside Dale, walking back to the counter and grabbing the last two plates I walk back over to the table.

"**burger with home fries and garden salad" **handing it to Dale

"**and last but not least a burger with home fries and chipotle on the side" **handing it to Jasper.. Our hands touched in that same instant and I felt a tingle.

"**Thank you darlin' looks good" **He gave me a smile .

"**Enjoy your meal gentleman." **I smiled and headed to the counter to serve an elderly couple that just walked in.

"**Good morning. I'm Bella, here are your menus would you like to order a drink now while your deciding what to order?" **I said with a smile. I loved older people, I found them so cute and full of wisdom.

"**Yes a decaf coffee for me and an orange juice for my lovely wife" **the man said while grabbing his wifes hand.

Awwww. **"Sure" **I quickly walked to the counter and gathered their drinks.

"**Here you go, are you ready to order?" **I asked.

"**Yes, ahem. We will have just the bacon, egg, sausage and whole wheat toast with the butter on the side please?" **the woman answered.

"**Not a problem" **I smiled to them both.

"**Oh, such a pretty girl, why are you working here? You should be a model or working somewhere making more money, someone like you shouldn't be slaving away. Poor baby." **The woman said.

"**Aw, thank you. I like this job though, flexible, having the pleasure meeting such nice people like yourselves. not to worry about me, but thank you." **I blushed to the woman.

"**Well, you should tend to that young man over there, he really is looking over very lovingly at you." **The man pointed out.

"**Right. If you'll excuse me, I'll tend to those young men." **I said with a smile. I made sure to shout the order to Mike, and head over to Jasper.

"**Sorry about that, is everything alright?" **I said.

"**Everything is just fine Darlin' can I just bug you for another coffee?" **Jasper replied with a wink.

"**Sure" **I said and refilled his cup.

"**Oh miss, can we have the bill too please?" **One of the guys said.

"**Of course." **I walked over to the cash, totalled the bill and heard my bell go off

"**Orders up Bee!" **Mike shouts. I shoved the bill in my pocket and grabbed the plates.

"**Here you both are, enjoy your breakfest!" **I smiled to the couple. God they were so in love and cute.

"**Thank you young lady" **The older man said.

I took off to Jaspers table. **"Here is your bill gentleman, I hope you come back soon." **I smiled and headed off to the kitchen.

"**Hey Bee. That guy is really staring at you" **Mike stated

"**What? Who?" **I started panicking.

"**That blond guy, sitting on the very outside of that table of guys" **Mike said nodding his head in the direction of the table

"**That's the guy from this morning, ahh no. That's not good, not good at all." **I said.

"**Bee, calm down, its fine. He's not Edward. Trust me, doesn't even look at you like he does" **Mike trying to sound soothing.

Aside from Mike and Angela no one knew why I ended up in this town alone.

"**Thanks Mike, you make me feel so warm inside" **I'm now starting to get worried It was my natural reaction thanks to Edward.

"**Bee, I'm not kidding. Edward was a fucking idiot. Trust me babe, your alright." **Mike said, now with his hands on my shoulders.

"**Alright Mike. Thanks" **I said.

Shit looking at the time it was almost 2 in the afternoon.

When I emerged from the kitchen. The 4 guys were gone and there was Jasper, my sexy saviour sitting at the counter.

"**I've got the bill right here darlin' but tend to that other table first." **He looked to me. I nodded.

I went to clear the table the guys were sitting at only to find the plates stacked and the cutlery on top. Wow. I grabbed the plates and glasses and dropped them off in the kitchen. Quickly heading back out to the elderly couple's table.

"**Was everything how you liked it? Would you like anything else, some more coffee or Juice?" **I asked.

"**Everything was good dear. Thank you, we would just like our bill please." **The woman spoke as I began clearing their table.

"**Of course, your welcome**." I smiled. I again, made a trip to the kitchen and rang up their bill, heading over to the couple again,

"**Here you are. I hope you both come back sometime very soon. Have yourselves a great day**." I smiled as warmly as I could, actually meaning the smile and not just having a fake one on to be nice. I really liked this couple.

"**We will. Thank you for a lovely meal, young lady.. You have a nice day too" **the woman said as she took her husbands hand, he put on his hat. Tipped it to me and held the door open for his wife, I waved and watched them walk hand in hand down the street.

"**Hey Bella.." **Jasper called**.**

"**Uh yeah.." **I walked over to him.

"**The bill?" **I really didn't want him to leave.

"**Here you go darlin'" **he handed me the bill, again our hands touched.

"**Since, I know your name, mine is Jasper" **he smiled and I quickly handed him the change and then he grabbed my wrist.

Why does it have to be my sore one?

"**Hey Darlin' this is going to sound very forward of me and you probably think I'm a weird stalker or somethin because of this mornin but I come here every day another girl Angela is working then." **he said with a slight frown. Wow Angela sees him everyday, I have to make a mental note to kill her now.

"**I was wondering if you weren't busy later if you'd like to go on a date with me?" **he broke my train of thought.

"**Um…. Yeah… sure." **I managed to get out. Good one Bella you are officially an idiot.

"**So how is 8 o'clock for you darlin'?" **God, I couldn't get enough of his voice.

"**Sure, where do you want to meet?" **I asked.

"**How about…" **He said while giving me that crooked smile.. **"where I almost swept you off your feet this morning?" **Oh. Fuck Me.

"**Yeah sure. 8 o'clock. By the way, thanks for earlier. You know I could've saved myself you know." **I answered.

"**I know you can handle yourself but it earned me a nice little kiss and the guy wouldn't have let up if I didn't. My best friend is exactly like him" **he chuckled.

"**Oh… I'm…. S…Sorry about that" **I stuttered now flustered.

Jasper leaned into my ear, **"Don't be darlin' that felt so good**" he breathed heavily.. **"and was so very worth it.. See you at 8 Bella." **and with that he walked out of the restaurant.

I looked down and there was a piece of paper. Simply written _just in case, heres my number, don't hesitate to call me darlin, Jasper. _

Wow. I woke up freaking out and here I am about to pass out. Thank god we close until the dinner rush.


	3. An Angel Appears

I do not own twilight or it's Characters.

*****JPOV**

Why is it a fucking Thursday? I hate the weekdays, unless its Friday. Thursday meant I had to fill out shit at work and listen to stupid Jessica babble on and on about nothing like the bimbo she is. It Is so annoying. I'm a gentleman so I won't be telling her off.

"**I'm goin for lunch early today. I'll be back shortly**." I tell Jessica and run out before she volunteers to come with.

She drives me fucking crazy I tell you. With that hair flipping all the time. I wonder if it's a tick or something seriously wrong with her.

The constant, sitting on my desk with her legs wide open like a fucking 7/11.

Her VOICE. How many times can someone say "Like" In a sentence? If there was ever a time I wished I wasn't raised like a perfect gentleman.. I would beat her senseless.

Too bad she isn't a guy.

I step outside and take in the morning air. Its always nice to be outside and not in some stuffy office with an annoying receptionist, Note to self, replace Jessica.

I admire this town, and its ways. I mean you've got the small flower shop owner who is a sweet older woman who's always nice and pleasant with everyone who walks by.

The bitchy lady on the corner waitin for a taxi, kids on their bikes, skateboards, or even just walking trying to rush to school.

You've got little old ladies trying to cross the street.

And then you have people like me.

Sort of lonely, knowing your missing something in life but you aren't sure what it is that your missing.

You've got money, good car, good business, good friends, a loving family but..

Something is left out.

You never cared about being with someone. You were happy being alone. You could always count on yourself at the end of the day.

_**(A/N sound familiar?)**_

I decide that today I'll end up on 5th street again. I know Angela is always sweet, maybe I can charm her into a slice of pie today. I silently chuckle at myself. Me and my charming ways. I wonder what….

what the hell?

Whoa a girl! I quickly grab her before she falls to hurt herself. Instantly cursing at myself for even thinking about snapping at her.

I meet a beautiful face, with gorgeous brown eyes and hair. She looks like a freakin' angel.

Quick Jazz say something you asshole. **"Sorry darlin', didn't mean to nearly knock you off your feet" **hoping that I sound nice and not the mental asshole I'm being to myself right now.

Man, those delicious chocolate brown eyes are looking into mine. I wonder…

"**Uhhh.. that's okay, thanks for not letting me hit the ground" **My dick twitched at the sound of her voice-so beautiful, just like her. Sounds strong but not in a butch kind of way.

"**Well, sweetheart, what kind of gentleman would I be if I let a pretty li' lady hit the ground?" **I give her my most impressive smile.

Mmm. Those lips, they are perfect. I could just lean in and kiss her, then persuade her into my car, its just a block from here.. I'd love to have her on top of my dick breathlessly saying my name.. mmm…

NO JAZZ STOP THINKING WITH THAT DICK OF YOURS. DO NOT PERSUADE HER. Take it easy cowboy.

"**I guess not a nice gentleman.. Well um, thanks for saving me from some pain.. But I have to get to work, Thanks again" **She smiled and walked away. I

think my heart just stopped right then. Someone get me a doc. She's killing me.

I decided to duck into a coffee shop to grab a coffee and try and calm down. My dick was just aching and I can't have that. No way.

When my dick stopped aching I decided it was a good time to head over to my favourite place. I noticed no one was here, hmm has to be a slow day.

I sit down, and some guys come in and sit 7 feet away from me.. Just then I hear someone coming over, I was about to say hello to Angela when, I heard,

"**Good morning. I'm Bella, I'll be your waitress this morning, here is a menu and a drink menu for you. I'll give you a moment to order." **

"**Why thank you darlin', while I think about what food to order, I'd like a coffee, that way you don't have to make too many trips to me." **

I looked up to see the girl from earlier in the morning My dick twitched in response. Fuck me. I can't leave now. Shit. Figured I could save my dick the pain. Which he was already telling me he was feeling.

"**Alright sir, how would you like it?"**.. Damn that voice was music to my dick, he was throbbing in pain now.

"**Darlin', I'll take it however you like it." **answer huskily apparently letting my dick do the talking. Fuck I should leave, I'm an asshole.

"**I'm sorry..?" **

"**Just black with two sugars darlin'" **I said trying not to think with my dick.

She turns away and I can't help myself from staring at her. I had to look at her ass, god was it ever perfect. So perky and firm. I'd love to have that ass sitting on my dick or even have my hands never leave it.

I have to stop this, getting too worked up in a fucking restaurant. I hear her introduce herself to those guys and then before I know it shes back to me with some coffee.. Mmm an angel definitely

Hearing those guys talk about her body. I really wanted to hit them. So I try to make small talk, trying to get my mind off those guys. I Open my mouth, Only to have those assholes take her away again.

All I can register is **"Belllllllaaa….. and your phone number to give you a good time" **in a stupid cheesy tone. I saw Fucking Red. Time to get cock blocked fucker.

I walked up to the table and Bella. Effectively putting my arm around her slender waist.

"**I know your trying to be slick and all dude, but that's my fiancée your trying to get into and I'd appreciate it if you'd stop because I'm 7 feet away enjoying my coffee trying to enjoy my gorgeous darlin work. And you are just making that horrible for me." **

At this point I want to rip his fucking head off. But then she turned to me.. Staring at me with love in her eyes. Fuck.. She is so perfect…

She leans in and kisses my neck and made me purr? I've never purred in my whole fucking life but that felt so good, please do it again, please.

Make my dick twitch and keep your lips in that spot, she was turning me into fucking putty.

I smile at her trying to make her feel the same way.

"**Sorry man, she isnt wearing a ring so I thought she was fair game- let me make it up to you. Meals on me and an open invitation to join us?" **fucking douchebag ruining the moment.

REMEMBER JAZZ BE COOL! **"Shes working, you think she wants grease on her ring? As long as your paying and my darlin' fiancee is no longer a object on your hit list, alright? Jasper" **

I extend my hand trying to look like the bigger guy.

"**Jasper Nice man, thought you'd break my jaw. I'm Dale, this is Mark, Tom and James" **God, I hate you. Cock blocker.

"**Man, I would have but never when a lady could get hurt" **

trying to make her putty to me. But honestly, I would never try and hit a guy with a girl in the way or near me. Not cool whatsoever.

"**I'll move another table for you guys." **That sexy siren is killing me.

"**No, darlin' you are going to be on your feet all day, let me move the table and you just worry your pretty head about our order, alright?" **

Man, I'm really good at acting like her boyfriend, I should be her boyfriend. She gives me that smile making my dick twitch again, fuck, I need to stop talking and looking at her, but I cant.

I'll need to have a cold shower soon as I leave. I end up just moving a chair into the open spot at the beginning of the table. If I move the table now, she'll be dragging it back.

"**So how long have you two been together if you don't mind me asking, she looks like quite a catch." **Mark, who was sitting beside the douchebag Dale, spoke.

"**Three years and a quarter. Don't I know shes a catch. First time I saw her, I knew I was a goner and here I am about to make her my wife forever. How about that dodgers game the other night fellas?" **I had to get the topic off of Bella before she came back. We began talking about the game when she came over.

The guys started talking about the game but I felt myself compelled to look at her. I just couldn't keep with the conversation.

"**Hello gentleman, here's your order. Lets see..a morning everything special with home fries," **passing it to Tom

"**Belt sandwich with home fries" **handing it to James

"**Cheeseburger with home fries" **passing it to mark and then swaying those sexy hips making my dick twitch again, damn it. Calm down!!!

"**Burger with home fries and garden salad" **she hands it to Dale

"**And last but not least a burger with home fries and chipotle on the side" **She hands me my plate, I reach out for it and her hand touches mine, and I feel a tingle.

I try to squeeze out **"Thank you darlin' looks good" **with a smile.

"**Enjoy your meal gentleman." **God that walk is killing me.

I Begin to eat and stare at her. I'm done for. I'm really done for. After a while she came over,

"**Is everything alright?" **

"**Everything is just fine Darlin' can I just bug you for another coffee?"** I felt bold so I gave her a wink.

"**Sure" **Damn not the answer I was expecting

"**Oh miss, can we have the bill too please?" **Mark asked.

"**Of course" **and she swayed those hips again, fuck these jeans are really hurting me now. She came back over and gave us the bill **. **

"**Here is your bill gentleman, I hope you come back soon." **

The guys paid and we switched numbers to hang out again later sometime next week. They were cool.

Dale was a bit of a douche but maybe that's because I'm a bit biased. They take off and here I am waiting for that beautiful angel to come back.

"**I've got the bill right here darlin' but tend to that other table first." **she looked a little upset and just nodded to me.

Her back was turned watching the cute older couple leave and my dick couldn'take it anymore her ass was just calling to him

"**Hey Bella.." **

She turned around **"Uh yeah.." **I pointed **"The bill?"**

"**Here you go darlin'" **I handed her the bill and again we touched and I got that same feeling.

"**Since, I know your name, mine is Jasper" **I smiled at her, I grabbed her wrist lightly, hoping to get the next part out while I still had a chance.

"**Hey Darlin' this is going to sound very forward of me and you probably think I'm a weird stalker or somethin because of this mornin but I come here every day another girl Angela is working then…..I was wondering if you weren't busy later if you'd like to go on a date with me?" **

I silently hoped Bella would be here in the mornings from now on

"**Um…. Yeah… sure." **she said

"**So how is 8 o'clock for you darlin'?" **Can't sound too eager. Even though I probably already do

"**Sure, where do you want to meet?" **Yes, guess I don't

"**How about…where I almost swept you off your feet this morning?" **I'm smiling like a fucking fool now

"**Yeah sure. 8 o'clock. By the way, thanks for earlier. You know I could've saved myself you know."**

"**I know you can handle yourself but it earned me a nice little kiss and the guy wouldn't have let up if I didn't. My best friend is exactly like him" **I laughed, had to make it light

"**Oh… I'm…. S…Sorry about that" **Shit! She's uncomfortable… turn up the charm Jazz!

"**Don't be darlin' that felt so good"** I breathed heavily into her ear, resisting the urge to suck on that beautiful neck..

She smelt so good.. My dick is going to explode.. Hurry up and get out of here..

"**And was so very worth it.. See you at 8 Bella."**

I quickly bolted out of the restaurant and went home to think of the beautiful girl and to tend to my throbbing dick.


	4. Date Night

****

**Again, I do not own twilight or its characters.**

******Bella POV**

"**Mike I'm headed home**" I yelled as I turned the closed sign ready to walk out.

"**Alright, see you tomorrow. Lock up when you leave." **He shouted back.

I locked up and decided to text Jasper. I didn't't know where we were going**.**

_Hey Jasper Its Bella. Where are we going tonight?_

_We're going to a nice restaurant. : )_

_Oh okay, um black tie type of thing?_

_No. You can just wear a simple dress or whatever you'd like Darlin._

_Alright. See you at the sweep spot in a few hours._

_Don't go falling into other guys arms now darlin ; )_

I sighed looking at the time and it was 3:30. Wow. Well, hopefully I could find a dress soon. I headed to the mall and looked around like a crazy person for a dress. I found a simple dark blue dress that hugged my curves and that had a low v neck. I found some nice pumps to match and headed home. By the time I had gotten home it was 6:30. Oh great! Barely enough time to get ready.

I decided not to rush on the shower. Letting the hot water hit my muscles that were aggravated from the train.

I have to look into a car, the train is killing me! Grabbing my strawberry wash I took my time lathering it onto my body making sure every part of me was clean. Taking my strawberry shampoo I gently massaged my head taking my time washing my hair.

I hopped out of the shower towel drying my hair, and deciding to just let it air dry and keep it straight. I put on some eyeliner and mascara, I hardly ever wear makeup and now wasn't the time to start piling it on my face.

I walked out of the bathroom and walked into my room, noticing that it was now almost 7:30. Great!

I find a blue bra and cute lace panties that matched my bra and I carefully slipped on my dress, zipping it up and putting on my pumps. Taking one last look in the mirror..

Wow.. I look good! I smirk to myself.

I grab my black clutch, a jacket and head out the door, taking the elevator this time because me in heels, and walking down stairs, not a chance I'll come out alive.

I make it to the street level of the station where I met Jasper with 5 minutes to spare. I decide that the wind is much too cold to stand in the open so I wait within the train terminal.

_I thought we agreed to meet at our spot :p _

_Well, you see.. It was too cold for me to stand in the open jerk!_

_I meant to be here earlier, come to the spot I'll keep you toasty warm ;) _

I made my way up the 3 flights of stairs, stepped out onto the street to be greeted with that sexy crooked smile.


	5. Back To The Past

**I don't own twilight or the characters!**

"**You look amazing Darlin' wow." **he got out breathlessly.

"**Thank you. You clean up pretty good yourself."** I smiled at him.

"**Thank You Darlin' Shall we?" **He extended his arm while flashing that crooked smile

"**Lead the way" **Putting my arm around his.

"**I hope you don't mind. I thought since it was chilly that I'd drive us over, don't want a pretty li' lady like yourself getting sick over a mischievous bad boy like me."** leading me over to his car.

Heading to open the passenger door, I took the moment to lean into his ear like he had done to me earlier today

"**Contrary to what you believe, I like mischievous men, especially sexy southern ones"** I breathed into his neck to drive the point home.

"**Oh Darlin' I have a feelin I'm going to be in a lot of trouble with you."** he smirked

"**Now ladies first"** opening the door **"Watch your head now."** putting his hand between the top of the car, preventing my head from hitting it. After I get in he shuts the door and gets in on the drivers side.

"**So, what it is that you do Jasper? Seeing as though you spent hours in my restaurant today." **I was too damn curious to not ask.

"**I'm actually a contractor.. I spent hours in your restaurant because I had to find a way to talk to a certain girl." **smirking at me

That's really making me want to skip dinner and go right to desert.

"**A contractor huh? Do you work within town?"** I couldn't get enough of his southern drawl.

"**Mostly out of town, I hate to be contracted to do one of the older buildings here in town. The west side of town is too beautiful to tear down and rebuild." **

he frowned a little **"You know that bakery on that end, the one near granny's deserts?"**

I knew that place, I used to visit it before Mr. Johnston had to close his doors. Such a nice place. **"Yeah I do. I used to frequent that place, Mr. Johnston was so pleasant to everyone." **

"**He's owing so much in back taxes that the only way to get free is to tear down the business and sell it to the highest bidder. I don't want to do it to him, he's asked me personally to get rid of it." **he frowned.

"**I know it seems like a bad thing but if he's asked you to, then you cant feel bad." **

I knew how he felt. Mr Johnston was a good guy who never did anything to anyone. I squeezed Jasper's hand- it was my way of offering support. He looked down, squeezed my hand and smiled.

"**Your right darlin', thanks."** with that he squeezed my hand again.

"**Enough of this talk, let's get some dinner." **with that he parked the car and rushed out to open my door again, he took my hand and I smiled at him.

Walking into the restaurant I noticed a "Greek" kind of vibe.

"**Ah Mister Whitlock, good evening. Where would you like your table?"** an older man, with a heavy Greek Accent greeted him.

"**Near the fountain please old friend."** he guided me to the table.

"**Such a beautiful woman. Please enjoy your meal."** the older man smiled to me taking a hand.

"**Thank you."** I smiled at him.

"**So Darlin' what do you do besides lookin' pretty, working in a restaurant?" **

"**I'm working towards being a lawyer but right now I'm taking a break from that."**

I didn't want to focus on Edward tonight.

"**Oh really? That sounds cool. So where you from orginally?" **

"**I'm from Forks Washington. How'd you know I'm not from around here?" **

He chuckled. **"Darlin' I've lived around here my whole life, I know almost everyone by their first name and know their families."**

He smirked. That was so sexy.

"**Oh. So, besides contracting, what do you do in your free time?"** His piercing blue eyes staring into my brown eyes.

"**I do a lot of recreational sports. Rock climbing, dirt biking, when I can I try and work out, have to keep in shape."** he winked at me.

"**I do about the same and I also take self defence classes."**

He lit up a little **"Wow, a girl who can definitely kick ass. That's something I wish all girls would take." **

And with that our meals were finished. He paid the bill not letting me go Dutch with him. Jasper smiled at me and took my hand leading me to his car.

"**I had a nice walk planned for us, but I didn't plan on it being this cold out tonight. I don't really want this night to end.." **he let his thoughts drift off.

"**Bella. I hope I'm not being…" **he grabbing my hand and squeezing it

"**I hope I'm not being to forward but I was wondering if you'd like to come back to my place. And I'm not saying this to get you into my bed. I'd just like to get to know you better." **He smiled.

"**Sure, just remember I can kick your ass if you jump my bones."**

I stuck my tongue out at him.

"**Alright, next stop casa Whitlock."** and with that we were driving, letting the car's music dance in our ears.

After a little while Jasper started to talk.

"**So do you have any family living with you or do you just live alone?"** Oh no. Well, might as well get that over with.

"**My biological family have all passed away, the people that did become my family aren't my family anymore."**

I was now fighting back tears and I noticed we had stopped. Jasper ran to my side of the car.

"**Bella I'm sorry I didn't mean to make you cry, I'm sorry.. I'm too damn insensitive tonight Darlin' I'm sorry." **

One of his hands running through my hair and the other wiping away my tears.

"**Darlin' I'm sorry. I just ruined this night. Here, I'll take you home." **

I grabbed his arm before he stopped. **"No, you.. didn't. Please, stay."** I managed to choke out.

"**Okay Darlin' where do you want to go?"**

I cant believe I was crying on a first date, poor Jasper.

"**Inside please. Please Jasper." **

Soon as I said his name, he picked me up whispering,

"**Its okay Darlin'.. I'm so sorry. I'm here, I'm not going anywhere." **holding me close to his body.

When we got inside I kept my head in the crook of his neck. He smelt so good. A mixture of old spice, cinnamon and the woods. The combined would've made me sick any other time but on him it was just right. It had a calming effect on me.

As we walked up the stairs I could feel his muscles through his shirt. Oh, he worked out a lot more then he said.

"**Here we go Darlin' if you want you can sleep here and I'll just be down the hall alright?"**

He laid me on the bed and I found my fingers around his shirt holding him tightly to me.

"**No, stay please. Let's talk." **

"**Are you sure? I mean I just made you cry." **

Pulling his body on top of mine **"Yes please, tell me about your family please."** pleading.

"**Alright but, I need to get off of you, its not a good spot for me to be in babe."**

I could smell his sweet breath, I should kiss him. I was about to when he got off of me and sat beside me with part of his back on the headboard. His hand grabbing mine and setting it on his chest.

"**Hmm.. My family.."** he began in a calm voice.

"**Well, obviously I'm a southern gentleman. My parents both from Texas. They were each others soul mates. And I'm talking the real deal, sort of the notebook if you will." **

His eyes lit up. I rubbed his chest.

"**I loved the way my parents looked at each other. It was like nothing else it the world was going on. They were like a couple of school kids sometimes. My dad would spin my mother around the room like a ballerina. They could dance..Although a few years ago my mother passed away." **

His eyes fell to his lap. I crawled onto his lap silently cursing at myself because were moving too fast.

I was getting too close to fast. This was not good.

"**Jasper, I'm sorry, I know how hard it is."** I cupped my hand under his chin and lifted his head, brushing the hair out of his face.

"**Darlin'.. "** he wrapped his arms around me and my heart skipped a beat.

"**Its fine. She's in a much better place now. Anyways, my father is still around. Currently in the hospital, nothing serious just had to stay over night while falling off a ladder." **He laughed softly

"**I swear he never knew when to quit. He's always doing the opposite of what needs to be done…" **his voice trailed off and his face inched closer to mine. I could smell his sweet cinnamon breath.

A tiny smile was dancing on his lips.


	6. Stay

_**I don't own twilight or its characters.**_

_Kelleygirl - Mike is not creepy in this story like he is in Twilight. He is like the Angela and Emmett combined in this story. The Edward back story is coming. I think within the next chapter or two. Cant really decide!_

_Aixa00- yes, everyone in this story is human! _

_Thanks for your comments! __J_

I leaned closer and found my lips meeting his. His tongue finding its way into my parted mouth and I moaned softly.

He leaned into me some more laying me down softly and I found my moment, I dragged my tongue lightly on his lips and took his bottom lip into my mouth sucking lightly and nibbled on it.

"**Oh Darlin'.."** he moaned.

By now my heart was speeding- going a mile a minute and I noticed he was breathing heavily.

I could feel his bulge in his pants pushing into my inner thigh. His arm was wrapped tightly around my body and the other was running his hand through my hair.

Oh no Bella You have to stop this, this is going too fast. Remember what happened last time.

I broke the kiss and he started the assault on my neck.

"**Jasperr"** I moaned into his ear.

He ground his hips into mine and immediately groaning.

"**Jasper, I can't go… "** his mouth was finding spots on my neck to suck on and it was driving me crazy, I was losing my self control.

"**Jasper, I cant… go.. Any.. further then this, I'm sorry…. Please.." **He looked at me with remorse written on his face.

"**Darlin' I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me. Your just so beautiful and smell so good.."** he groaned.

"**Forgive me sweetheart, I'm really going too fast here."** I placed a tiny kiss on the crook of his neck.

He Groaned again **"Bella, I'm trying to be good but you aren't helping, here.."** he helped me up.

"**I think either we should go to bed or I should take you home because I can't help myself right now."** Look who's talking

"**You aren't the only one losing it. I don't want to be alone tonight. Anywhere. If I promise not to kiss you where it will cause a problem.. Will you stay in here tonight with me?"** I looked up at him with my hands in my lap.

"**Darlin' I'll go anywhere you ask me to."** he smiled, unbuttoned his shirt revealing a tight white shirt underneath.

My arousal was growing. **"I'll get you something to wear to bed so you don't ruin that dress and you are more comfortable."** he said as he walked out of the room.

In that exact moment my phone went off.

_Hey Bella haven't seen you tonight. RU okay? - Mike_

_Yeah Im fine just out. _

_Out? With who? - Mike_

_Went on a Date with the guy from today_

_Oh.. Okay is it okay? Your txting me - Mike_

_It went really good. Hes getting me something to wear_

_Wear? Oh no Bella you arent are you - Mike_

_No I Am not does it even matter? Why are you txting me?_

_Wanted to know if you were coming out to meet us but guess not gnite bel - Mike_

_Good night Mike say hi to everyone for me._

I put my phone down and Jasper walked into the room.

"**I wasn't sure what you'd like to sleep in Darlin' so you've got some options. Don't worry they are all clean."** He Winked and I Laughed

"**I finally made the beautiful girl laugh"** he smirked I just lean in and kissed his lips tenderly, before pulling back I nimble on his lip.

He groaned again and that was so sexy.

"**If I get that every time I make you laugh you better beware your face will hurt from it." **

"**Okay, so The bathroom is just 1 door to your left when you step out of this room. Go get changed babe."** He slapped my ass lightly.

"**Yes sir." **I swayed my hips as I walked out hearing him suck in some air. Laughing to myself lightly.


	7. Fast Track

_**Again, don't own twilight or its !!! **_

_**THERE IS A LEMON IN THIS CHAPTER.. **_

_**SO IF YOU DO NOT WANT TO READ IT… MOVE ALONG!!!**_

****JPOV**

I cant believe I went from having the perfect date to making her cry, telling her about my parents and almost having my way with her like an animal.

I really lose my head when I'm with this woman. This is not good. I can't be rushing with her, its no way to act or start a relationship.

She made it so easy just to be myself. I watched as she swayed those beautiful hips and watching that ass walk out of the room, my dick twitched again to her.

I had to try and breathe, get a hold of yourself Jasper Hale Whitlock!

I laid down on the bed trying to will my erect dick away, I have to be a gentleman here, like I always am. I cant let her bring out the sex-crazed asshole out of me.

Bella walked back into the room, I lifted my head and did she ever look mouth watering in my PJ pants and my black shirt. Damn, only she could make it look so damn good. I expected her to sit beside me but she surprised me..

She crawled into my body sitting on top of my dick. My dick again came alive, fuck me.

She smiled seductively and kissed me tenderly. My hands started tracing her body and she began to lean more of herself into my chest.

She kissed me tenderly again, deepening the kiss.. I returned what she was looking for. My tongue was dancing with hers and it was driving me crazy.

One hand was grazing her ass.. She nibbled on my lip as I started rubbing her back. She was making me lose it. I grab her hips and grind my dick into her sweet centre.

"**Bella… are you sure?" **

She moaned in my ear. **"Yess oh Jazz." **

And began sucking on my neck.. That's It. I flipped us over, putting myself on top of her.. My turn to make her lose her mind. I began sucking on her neck she moaned out loud. My Dick twitched again for the millionth time.

TAKE IT SLOW WHITLOCK!I moved near her ear **"That's it Darlin' let me know what feels good" **she rubbed her hips against mine.

I moved down towards her navel lifting her shirt.. Exposing that sweet skin. Kissing and sucking her stomach. It smelled so good. Like Strawberries, I started sucking a little more violently and she withered under my mouth, moaning yet again.

"**Jazz, please… please.."** She pulled her body up and making my mouth hit her center.

I pulled myself up, looking at her **"Are you sure Darlin'? I don't want to go too fast here. I.." **

"**Just shut up and continue making me feel good so that I can return the favor."**

My dick now stood up straight and it was killing me. I moved down to her centre and pulled the PJ pants down to reveal a sexy pair of blue panties.

"**So sexy babe"** I pulled them off massaging her legs and feet before moving into her center once again.

She parted her legs and I made quick use of the ground I was given. I started with trailing my tongue all over her pussy.. She was already convulsing. She sat up, her hand ran down her body over my head and down under my PJ pants and wrapping her little hand around my dick. My mouth started sucking on her clit.

"**Jasper, please no more teasing"** she's begging?

"**Darlin' your teasing me"** I plunged a finger inside she moaned softly.. I plunged another finger inside her and she flipped us over.

Sitting on my hand she began riding up and down on my fingers.. I slowly moved her and my hand down towards my cock.. She fucked my hand for a minute and smirked. She smirked at me?

Oh shit I'm in for it. She pulled my fingers out cursing at the lost of contact and pulled my PJ pants down.

"**Its your turn to be teased Mr Whitlock" **She's unbelievable.

I'm never teased. She softly wrapped her mouth around my dick. Her warm, wet mouth tightly around my dick made me see stars. It took everything I had not to shove my dick into her mouth.

"**Darlin.." **I groaned loudly, **"babe you need to stop before I get off and you are still riled up. " **

She stopped and sat on my dick again **"It would be okay, it would just mean you'd have to make me cum some other time."** her voice was so seductive.

Damn. She began rocking back and forth on my dick while sucking on my neck. I began stroking her breasts, making her cum into my dick.

"**Jazz you need to fuck me.. Fuck me so hard I cant walk, please"** she breathed into my ear. Rocking harder into my dick.

Fuck this pleasure was becoming painful. **"you got it babe." **I flipped us over and grabbed a condom out of the drawer.

I put the condom on quickly wanting to get into her a few times before I came. I rubbed her clit a few times and angled my dick into her. She screamed my name as I plunged into her

"**Jazz… "** she pulled on my bottom lip **"don't waste time going slow, please hammer into me like it's the very last thing you do" **

"**Music to my ears baby"** I began thrusting hard into her, In and out each time pulling out and thrusting back into her so hard our pelvic bones were smashing each other.

After about 6 times of doing this She began moaning so loudly she lifted her head and bit my neck. Her walls started closing around me

"**Jaa-azz.. I'm co- coming.. Oh god.. Harder please J-azzzz" **she can barely breathe..

I hammer into her harder, my balls and pelvis smacking even harder into her pelvis. Fuck we were going to be sore tomorrow if I didn't break any bones.

"**Darlin' .. I'm not finished yet.. Hang on please for another two minutes" **

"**Jazz.. Just…. Keep… going.. I want you to cum into me."** She began rocking her hips into my dick and I flipped her on top of me

"**Why don't you keep going for me and make me cum… make me say your name Darlin'" **she smiled at me and began riding on me with so much speed I had to hold her hips in place.

Her breasts were bouncing around so beautifully, I sucked on a nipple and she began rubbing herself and riding me even faster.

I had to close my eyes, I couldn't take the pleasure she was giving me. I was holding back on releasing.. I wanted to take as much pleasure as I could..

"**I'm so close Darlin' keep going you feel so good…. Soo soo good." **I felt her lips kissing and sucking my neck again.

"**Uhhhh… Bellllllla.. You…. Your…" **There is no way I can hold back much longer but god, if I do this feeling will end.

"**Let go Jazz.. I'm so close, let go.." **She found my lips and we begun our dance again.

I was losing the fight to holding back, I decided to given in and my hands made her move faster. Up and down faster on my dick, her walls were closing…

"**Bella, hold on to that orgasm, please it'll be worth it."** with that she kept rubbing her clit dragging out her orgasm, her walls kept tightening around my dick, and I kept the rhythm of her movements on my dick. She put her arms around my neck, breathing into my ear..

"**Jazz… Uhhh… make me see stars… uhhhh.." **with that I pounded into her so hard she was crying.. I rode out her orgasm and let myself spill into her.

She hugged me so tightly I didn't have the heart to move, instead we sat there, our arms around each other and my dick still in her. Catching her breath

"**Jazz, that was amazing but I hope you don't think of me as a 1 night stand" **tears began to form in her eyes. **"This was a mistake. Oh my god. This was wrong."**

I had to get her to stop **"No Bella Darlin' this wasn't a mistake. You aren't easy… I actually thought maybe we could become serious. You my girlfriend, me your boyfriend. You aren't a one night stand you fulfilled needs that were never even approached by anyone ever. Darlin' don't cry, you are the most amazing woman I've ever had the pleasure of meeting and I don't regret a second of what has happened tonight." **I kissed her tenderly and her frown stayed on her lips. Oh shit.

*****BPOV**

My heart was breaking. **"Jasper, I had a good time tonight and this was so amazing but we moved too quickly. I should've stopped you. Oh God… I'm Sorry." **

I can't let myself get close to him. Its too dangerous, I just hope he didn't see the mark on my thighs and center

"**Bella, you have nothing to apologize for darlin'" **he wrapped his arms around me putting kisses all over my face. What a sweetheart.

"**No Jasper. I Do. I was stupid, I'm an idiot. I'm Sorry."** I pushed him away and made my way to the bathroom, willing the tears to stop until I was safe in the bathroom.

I put on my dress and my bra. Splashed cold water on my face, ow. It stung my eyes.

A quiet knock hit the door. **"Darlin' I'm sorry. I'm sorry if I scared you. Please come out. Your scaring me darlin'."**

I folded the clothes and opened the door to a very worried Jasper. He had his head down with his arms pressed up on the frame.

"**I'm sorry for scaring you Jasper. I have to go… I can't stay here… I had a really good time. You're amazing and so easy to be around but I think I've freaked myself out. I need some time." **I said, silently hoping I hadn't broken his heart.

He looked up at me, taking the clothes from my hands and then meeting my eyes. **"I understand. I'll give you that time…" **he took a breath **"Do you want me to drive you home?"**

I had to make a clean break for now. **"No. Jasper. I have to leave on my own. All I need is some time, I promise to make it up to you. Until then, please don't see me, don't try to call or text me. I just need space. I'm so sorry. "** I kissed the crook of his neck and his eyes were watering.

He cleared his throat **"Are you sure? Its late out. I will respect your wishes. I just hope someday you'll tell me what has you so freaked out."** He kissed my cheek and led me to the bedroom picking up my phone and coat, sliding the coat on me and leading me down the stairs.

He stood in front of me, his back to the door. Arms on my shoulders rubbing them slightly.

"**Please promise me you'll call me when you get home, just so I know you made it okay. I really wish you'd let me drive you home."**

Putting a finger on his lips, he kissed them. **"Jasper, its fine. I will be okay, just be praying that any guy who comes across me doesn't get hurt too badly."**

we chuckled at that thought **"I promise to call you. Thank you again, for everything. You truly are a real gentleman."**

I kissed the crook of his neck one last time, he sighed at the contact and opened the door for me. I took one last look at him and my heart broke at the sight. I shook my head and started to make my way home.

Stupid Bella.

Stupid.

Stupid.

Stupid!

*******

**JPOV**

What did I do? I just scared the most perfect girl in the world away. If mom could see me now she'd curse me. Why didn't I beg? Plead? Anything but let her walk out. Such heart wrenching pain… why am I feeling like this?

Of course, being the stupid southern gentleman I am. Here I am laughing at a thought of her hurting another guy for jumping her, she was funny.

"**I promise to call you. Thank you again, for everything. You truly are a real gentleman."**

Snip. Here comes the pain.

She kissed that spot and my knees were getting weak. I sighed. She really knew how to sooth me whether she knew it or not.

I opened the door, she swung her hair and I got one last whiff of that smell I love so much.

Walking out the door, she turned to look at me and I couldn't even muster a smile the strings holding my damaged heart together were almost completely gone. Soon as I couldn't see her anymore. I shut the door.

My heart began to bleed in pain.

I headed upstairs and went into my bathroom.

It smelt heavily of her, I inhaled deeply. Closing my eyes trying to remember her scent. Its all I had left. Looking up into the mirror seeing for the first time, the mark she left on my neck. I smiled, knowing in was when we were both connected, being pleasured and in sync with each others needs.

The Pang of pain returned in my heart. I went to our bed, holding the pillow that smelled of her. Drifting to sleep the last thing I thought was…..

Snip.

Snip.

Snip.

She's GONE.

*****BPOV**

I finally get home… trying to will my arms from around my chest. It just felt right.

Again, here I am holding myself together, or at least trying to - with my arms.

Why does this hurt so much, why did Edward do this to me? I hate this.

I collapse on my bed. Remembering I have to call Jasper, I find his number and dial.. Trying to find the strength to sound like I'm not being ripped open and bleeding. It rings quite a few times. Hmm, that's weird.

"**You've reached Jasper, I'm not here at the moment, Leave a message and away to contact you back and I'll return the call."**

Beeeep.

"**Hey Jazz. Its Bella. I got back alright, just letting you know. I hope your okay, I'm sorry. I'll you again soon. Bye" **I hung up and started crying.

Crying for what Edward did to me

Crying for letting someone in so quickly

Crying for what I did to Jasper.

For what Jasper's feeling.

The pain cut like a knife.

Just like how Edward cut me.

I drifted off to sleep, only to relive that day over again


	8. Reliving The Nightmare

**DON'T OWN TWILIGHT OR THE CHARACTERS.**

****Flash Back** (5 Years Ago)**

**I stared right into his gorgeous green eyes. They were becoming darker with the lust he was feeling.**

"**You know I love you, I'll love you no matter what. Are you sure about this Love?" **he picked himself off of me looking for any hesitation in my eyes.

I knew why he was asking, last time we tried to do this I made him get off me and threw him out of my house. Crying the whole night until I cried myself to sleep.

I took a deep breath **"Yes Edward. I'm ready. I want us to experience this together. I Love You"** I pulled him onto me and he began pushing his Dick into my center.

I whinced at the contact. Tears started forming in my eyes.

"**Edward stop for a minute"** I blubbered out.

"**You said you were ready"** He yelled at me plunging deeper into me, getting rougher and going harder with every thrust.

"**I am ready! Just give me a mintue to endure this pain. Its so painful please Edward stop!"** He suddenly got off of me and went over to his dresser opening his drawer, taking something out, and returning to me.

"**Here love, this will take away the pain."** he slipped a pill into my mouth.

"**What, what is it Edward?"** trying to wipe my tears away

"**Its just some Ibuprofen love, you'll feel better in a minute" **he smiled at me, kissing me tenderly. **"Okay love, you feel better now?"**

I nodded, and he began thrusting in me again.. It hurt yet again.

"**Edward stop please, it still hurts."** he growled at me and slid down my body, **"This will make you feel better love"**

He began sucking and licking my clit and it felt good, for a moment.

Then I felt the most unimaginable pain ever. It felt like putting hand sanitizer on your hands when you have cuts all over them but magnetized 500 times more.

"**Edward what are you doing stop!"** I yelled trying to push him off of me.

"**No you don't get to tell me what to do Isabella!"** my limbs felt weak I couldn't do anything, what is going on, I don't have the strength to move but I can feel pain, what is going on?

"**Edward what is happening? What are you doing, why cant I barely move? Edward!"** frantically thinking I'm now dying.

He tried to shush me,** "Shh, Isabella…. You are fine. You are just a subject for me Love."** He laughed and that gave me a bad feeling **"We're going to play this my way, you are mine and no one else is going to have you love…. Mine forever"** He Laughed again.

It was then I realized he had tied me up.. What the fuck? **"What are you doing?"** I started to cry, fearing my life.. Now the love of my life is hurting me? Tying me up? Calling me a object?

"**I.. Isabella am marking you."** he showed me the knife covered in blood. **"Now relax, if you stay quiet it will be over soon, I promise."** He began cutting me, I couldn't see where exactly but I felt the pain. How he sliced into my skin, oh the pain. It's agonizing!!!

Please someone make it stop. I wince over and over again and Edward Moans. He is truly sick. After what felt like hours, he stopped. **"There, you are now mine. Wherever you go, you'll always have the reminder of me."** He covered my mouth and forced his way into me

"**Now, I want to feel you squeezing the life out of my dick. Do it Isabella, you love me so do it" **He began rubbing my clit furiously, I felt my climax coming, I Bit his hand and he went to hit me, I had to lie now.

"**I'm sorry baby, I thought pain turned you on so I bit you. I didn't mean to hurt you.. I just thought it would make you cum faster"**

He put his hand around my neck and thrust into me over and over again tightening his hold on my neck.

"**Don't you ever forget, you are mine and no one will ever love you or your body again."** that's the last thing I heard before I passed out.

**Present Day** (3 weeks later)

I woke up in a cold sweat. Like always.

Stupid Edward. He was right.

I went into the bathroom and found the pills that always help me sleep. I took two of them and rolled back into bed.

I woke up in a bad mood. I had work this morning. Thinking to what had happened in the last few weeks.

Regardless of what anyone ever said… Edward was right. No matter what, no one will ever love me or my body. Thanks to him, I wont let anyone love me. I can't allow myself to love.

Look where it gets me. It took me nearly 5 years to get here and be on my own. The one time in my life I have control and I go and fall for the FIRST guy to actually be a real gentleman and not a jerk!

This cannot go on any longer. I have to tell Jasper I cannot be with him. As much as it hurts me to even think it, it'll be worse to tell him.

I get up and out of bed. Tripping over my pumps I was wearing last night with Angela and hit the ground. Fuck, what a nice way to start the day.

I get into the shower and let the hot water run over my sore body until the hot water runs out. I get out and dry off. Wiping the steam off the window, that's when I see it. A bruise on my shoulder already forming, that's what I get for not putting the shoes somewhere else.

Humph. I look like hell, did a car run me over in my sleep? No it was just Edward haunting me, again.

I shake my thoughts of him away. Deciding not to even bother with makeup today, I throw my hair into a bun and put on some light blue jeans and a white shirt. I throw on my coat and head out.

The train takes some time again this morning. I run up the stairs at my stop and trip, smashing my collar bone into the step. Giving my first bruise a friend.

"**Fuck Me.." **You think I'd get better at not being a klutz.

I arrive to work 2 hours late. Great. I run in the front door and pass the many people in the restaurant. Fuck Of course the one day I'm late to work its busy as shit and Mike is the only one here.

"**I'm sorry Mike, I'll take the tables from now on." **I greeted him.

"**No, Bee, its fine. I got the tables, you look like hell. Tell you what, I already called Ang. She's on her way in. Head home honey." **he replied to me. His green eyes filled with fear. Why is he acting like he's on drugs?

"**No Mike, call Ang tell her to stay home, its her day off. Please? She never gets a day off."** using my brown eyes to get him to comply.

"**Okay, fine. Get out there you piece of work. This one goes to Table 2 and this one to Table 3"** instructing the plates.**. "Table 4 needs a coffee, can of coke, orange juice and a menu"** He sighed while handing me the plates.

"**and table 5 is a coffee, black 2 sugar."** he put his head down and went to the burners. Mike was weird today, that bothered me, he never acted like this.

I went and did what was instructed. Shouted orders to Mike, checked and cleared tables. Made a fresh pot for the lunch crew that would be heading in. I remembered the person at Table 5 and their coffee. Shit. I took the remaining pot of coffee and headed to the table.

I gasped and the coffee pot slipped from my hand.

*****JPOV**

Man did my head ever throb today. My heart still bled. Today is another black Friday. which meant work at the office, stacks of papers to fill out, calls to make.. And Jessica. Fuck that. I am out on the field today. Peter can deal with that crazy bitch.

I got into the shower, washing myself and started thinking of Bella, yet again.

What was that pretty li' thing doing this morning? Heading to work? Or sleeping silently?

I missed her so much. What the hell?

I don't fall this quick. Could it be what Mama told me? I'd meet her one day and fall for her like Dad did for her?

Why couldn't she be here now? I needed her more then anything. I shook my head.

Stop thinking about her, you'll go crazy and she needed space. I tried to push her from my mind. But her smell, was adamant on staying on the forefront of my mind.

I pulled on some light blue, loose fitting jeans, a tight white tank, a buttoned up white shirt.. Walked down the stairs and found my brown cowboy boots. Fuck it, this was the time I could get away with them so, I'll wear them. After grabbing a jacket I headed out the door.

I drove to the office- walking quickly and missing Jessica on her way in. Wondering if my mama was trying to help me today, for some reason.

I signed some papers and told Peter he was holding down the fort while I went to work onsite.

I headed over to the Johnston bakery. It made me sad. I didn't want to be tearing down his place just to built a pointless bastards building, knowing they were assholes. But it had to be done. Mr. Johnston said so. And for a friend, I would.

I conveyed the site, noting every wall and where the dynamite would go and what kind of materials that we were dealing with. The building itself was good to blow up in one go.

It was now 11 o'clock, wow, those 4 hours flew by.

I think I'll get something to eat. I know granny's is open and she'll always make me something not on the menu, the sweet soul.

But I have to head over to Harry's. I don't know why. But I do. Maybe Ang will hook me up with some pie, the sweet girl she is. I smiled, screw the car I'll just walk there, since I'll be having pie.

A part of me was wishing that Bella would be working.

******?? POV**

This is sort of a small run down town, based on tourism no doubt. God, I've been driving for hours and I'm hungry. Hmm, Harry's.. no other breakfast nooks open at 10 am?

There we go! Perfect parking, not too far away but not too close to be a lazy asshole either. Its slightly cold. Ugh, cant wait to go home.

My hunger is getting the better of me. Stepping inside I find a small table near the wall, closest to the window, so I can keep an eye on my car..

Wow, this is a packed place. Well, nice to know I won't feel so paranoid and alone. Probably helps that it is Friday morning. Early though, but still Friday.

"**Good morning. Would you like anything to drink before you order?" **Giving me a smug look.

Fuck you prick. **"How about a Coffee, black 2 sugar"** snapping at him. He left a menu on the table and walked away.

I looked out the window. Seeing a little girl with long brown hair and a little boy with blond hair sticking in wild directions holding hands, running across the street. The boy lets the girls hand go briefly and the girl falls. The little boy immediately goes to her side, helping her up, wiping her tears and kissing her cheek. Probably telling her he loves her and how sorry he is. They walk away hand in hand. I laugh a little at this sight. They remind me so much of me and her. I miss her so much, where did I go wrong?

No. I didn't go wrong! She was wrong, she denied me everything, and for what? Nothing? She simply needed to be reminded of how much I love her. After all she is branded by me. She mine and If she wont remember well, then no one will have her.

We're Romeo and Juliet. No one is meant to have Juliet except Romeo. They belong together.

I see someone run by the window and run inside. Its obviously a girl. And she looks like she's in too much of a rush. She has a nice body. Nice curves, legs look good from what I can see.. Her hips sway and it is really distracting, she knows how to use her body.

Oh wow, she works here.. I wonder if I can charm her into the backseat of my car and put that body to use.

I'm all for sex. Any girl who is willing to give it up, I'll take it and objectify them. Why not? They're offering it up for free anyways, I don't even have to work too hard for it. These girls were stupid. Ha!

I stared at the menu again, I didn't need to get horny in a restaurant. I'll find her later if need be. I heard footsteps coming towards me so I looked up to see a coffee pot slowly hitting the floor and meeting the eyes of someone I thought had left me forever.

*****BPOV**

I felt the blood rush to my head, oh no. I'm going to pass out.


	9. Good Vs Evil

DON'T OWN TWILIGHT OR THE CHARACTERS.

Stay calm Bella he won't hurt you here.

Just talk to him calmly, serve him and then let him leave, don't give him a reason to talk anymore then necessary to you - let him walk out. You have to.

"**Edward…. What are you… What are you doing here?"** I tried not to panic. I cannot let him get the upper hand. Not again.

"**I'm having breakfast Isabella, I didn't know you work here.. So you live here now huh?"** a smile danced on his lips.

There was a time I'd lose myself in those eyes, that smile.. But not now.

"**I work here yes…. Is there anything you'd like to order from the menu?"** please god, don't let Edward call me out on being afraid, please!

"**I'll have the good morning sunshine with extra crispy bacon"** He smiled the smile that used to make me melt.. But this time it didn't.

"**Alright. Not a problem, I'll be back with some coffee for you."** I turned on my heel and tried not to let my hips sway.

I came back with his coffee when he put his hand on my lower back **"So Isabella, time has really been on your side huh?"** He winked. **"You look really good, not that I doubted it before, but damn you look better then I ever imagined"** Smirking. It was gross.

I backed away from him when he grabbed my hand, I stepped forward and set the coffee down, putting my other hand around his trying to pry his fingers away.

At that same moment, I heard the door open. I looked over and my heart skipped a beat.

*****JPOV **

I took my time walking to Harry's. Taking in everything like I usually did.

The barking of a dog being tied up outside a variety store.

A little old lady across the street selecting fruit and veggies from the local grocers' market.

Looking and seeing two children running across the street, one little girl, a brunette and a little boy who was a blond. It was cute, holding hands- suddenly the little boy let go and the little girl fell. He immediately rushed to her side.. Helped her up and they began again, holding hands. It reminded me of Bella so much, our date how we held hands and then how she cried- how quickly I ran to her side to console her.

My heart started bleeding again.

The pain was too much, it was like losing my mama all over again. Damn it!

I looked at my watch it was now 11:45.

I finally came to Harry's and stepped inside, when my heart stopped.

There she was, the girl that had consumed my heart, inflicted all my senses and drove me crazy in my head. She was working, and having her hands wrapped around another man's. S

he was looking at me with terror in her eyes and I saw red. I wanted to beat the shit out of him. Touching _my_ girl.

WHOA!

She wasn't _my_ girl. I needed to calm down. All I know is that could be her boyfriend, he could be the reason she didn't call me, didn't come see me.

Fuck..

I took a table towards the back of the restaurant. I didn't want to be anywhere near him.

She finally ripped away from his hand, his face told me that he was pissed. He tried to wrap an arm around her body and Bella backed away.

She didn't want him and he was taking it badly.

I decided to get up and walk over to her, I had to get her away from him, He looked wild, rabid, like a dog with rabies.

"**Good mornin Darlin'"** I gave her a warm smile, putting hand on the small of her back and she backed into my touch more, moving closer to me.

He looked at me, his nose flared and his fists clenched. My Mind was screaming at me, I knew this guy was dangerous. I had to get her away from him.

"**You alright here?" **I smirked at her and moved my hand from her lower back to rub her arm.. Interlacing our fingers together.

She turned more into my body and smiled- my heart stopped. **"Yeah, I'm great.."**

She kissed that spot on my neck but I had to keep my eye on this guy. Who was clearly losing it.

"**Good well, what are you going to feed me with today Darlin' you know all that work makes me hungry.."** I winked at her and kissed her cheek.

"**Okay, come on let's get you fed" **she turned on her heel.

"**Ladies always first darlin'"** She smiled again and went off to fetch a menu.

I sat down at my table but my eyes never left Bella the rabies infected psychopath.

She came back over and poured me some coffee she was visibly shaken.

"**Thanks… Thanks Jazz. That was just too much"** her eyes never left my table.

"**Darlin' I'd do anything for you. Do you want me to stick around until he leaves? Or until your done work? I don't want to be invading your space, you told me you needed some time but I'm here if you need me honey." **I really wanted her to know she could count on me for anything.

She finally met my gaze. **"Yes Jazz. Stay please. Don't leave until I do. Please." **

She was trembling. I put my hand on her hip.

"**Do.. Do you remember what you asked me?"**

Did I remember? Of course. **"Yes Darlin' .. what about it?"**

She stopped shaking. **"The answer is Yes Jazz. Yes a million times over. Just don't leave okay?"** I grabbed her hand, brought it up to my lips and softly kissed it.

"**If you wish darlin' just please calm down, your making me want to take you out of here now."** I drank some of my coffee looking around her

"**Be careful honey, I don't like how I'm seeing this guy, okay?"** She flinched.

Whoa, worse than I thought.

"**Don't worry Jazz"** with that she continued her work.

I ordered some food about 20 minutes after I first sat down. And 20 minutes after I finished eating, I looked up and he still wasn't leaving.

What the hell is this guy thinking? He kept looking at Bella like an object, if he didn't stop. I would make him regret ever touching her.

I started growling.. Not loud enough for anyone to hear but it was definitely there. Why didn't he leave. What a psycho.

*****EPOV**

I started trying to figure out this idiot, southern bitch who had his hooks into my girl. Who does this guy think he is?

Taking my girl away from me.

He is going to pay.

I looked over to my angel. Tending to everyone's needs. She smiled so brightly I thought I was going to die.

She is so beautiful but no one can have her. Not even a stupid blond. I will make her mine again. Mine and only mine!

I called her over again for some coffee. She came over but was nervous, why is she nervous?

Possibly because her little boyfriend would see her pull towards me? Hmm..

Interesting, I could use it to my advantage.

"**So.. Bella. When do you get off work?"** I looked to my watch,** "What time is it?"**

She bit her bottom lip. **"Its just about 1 love." **

She took a small step back, that's not a good thing. **"Oh, I get off in about another hour."** She said with a flat tone.

Uh Oh. **"Oh, well I was wondering if we could grab some coffee and catch up.. What do you say?"** I had to try and get her to open herself to me.

"**Actually, I can't. I'm busy." **

Damn it **"Oh well, why don't we switch numbers and we'll get together some time. You know Esme misses you, she'd be disappointed to know I had run into you and didn't get a number to where she could call you." **I smiled a little, so I pulled the mom card.

It was true Esme missed her and loved her like her own.

I knew Isabella felt the same way. **"Um…"**

She was hesitant, why is she so afraid of me? Doesn't she know I love her?

"**Okay."** she quickly rattled off her number and walked to another table. I noticed Blondie staring at me so I smirked at him and lifted my cup to him.

Edward 1

Loser Blond 0.

*****BPOV**

To say I was shaken was an understatement. I was having a panic attack, that's not easy to control, when the man you love, the man you hate and are afraid of are in the same room along with 8 other tables. I am having the BEST day and the WORST day ever.

I tried to focus on my work and that sexy crooked grin I was treated to every so often. I was really trying to hang on to my panic attack, it was slowly slipping away. I'm so grateful that Jazz walked in when he did.

Soon as he touched me, I knew I couldn't be without him. He filled the ache I've felt the past three weeks. He was so much more beautiful then I noticed. Minus the bags under his eyes and his light ice blue eyes being as dark as a blue pen.

Finally I cleared out the restaurant around 2pm just in time to close.. Except for Edward and Jazz.

"**Mike I'm close to closing, I'll call you later"** I called to him.

"**Yeah, Bee, take care. Call me when you get in"**

"**Don't worry I will"** I took off my apron and set it in the back like I always do.

I came back out to the front and was met with a pair of arms, the shirt was the wrong color though.

"**Isabella. I was so glad to run into you today." **He wrapped his arms around me.

Why wasn't Edward leaving? He grazed my butt momentarily and took a whiff of my hair and groaned.

I started freaking out. I stepped back from him.

"**Yeah, nice to see you too Edward. Well, you better leave I'm locking up."**

He stepped closer to me **"I'll be seeing you Isabella"** he whispered.

"**Darlin' lets go"** I grabbed the extended hand from my beautiful cowboy,

"**Okay Cowboy, lets go.."** I gave him a quick deep kiss on the lips hoping Edward got the point.

"**Take care Isabella, like I said you look good" **his eyes raking over my body and I felt Jazz' arms tightly wound around me and putting chaste kisses on my neck.

I could feel his growling through his body. **"Yeah my Darlin' does look good. She's with me, why wouldn't she be?"**

Jazz took my hand and led me towards the door.

"**Well, good sir, if you wouldn't mind leaving so that we could too. I've got some time to make up to my Darlin' here."**

Edward shot Jazz a dirty look and I flinched. Jazz' arms wound around me again.

Jazz really doesn't know how many buttons he's pushing with Edward, my painic attack came back 10 times worse..

Edward finally walked out and walked down the street leaving me and Jazz alone.

*****JPOV**

My Darlin' was really scared.

What the hell was going on?

He left before I could deck him. I swear another 5 seconds and I would've broken his fucking jaw.

Bella kept flinching.

At everything.

A dog barked and she almost bawled.

Something is really wrong with her.

Its truly scaring me. I decided to pick her up and tried to sooth her, the best I could.

"**Darlin'… Darlin' its alright, your with me. I'm not gon' let anything happen to you. You know that right?"** she buried her face into my shoulder, she started crying and breathing heavily. **"Shh…. Its okay.. Shh.. I'll take you to my place okay? Your Safe, its just me. Shhh."**

We arrived at my car, **"Darlin' I've got to set you down, I don't want to release my hold on you, but I have to get us home okay?"** she nodded and I set her in the car and bolted to the other side, not wanting to leave her for a minute, I started my car and she set her head on my lap, still crying.

"**Baby.. Shh… Its okay"** I stroked her head wiping her tears away, breaking the law speeding to my place, trying to lessen the time I spent driving instead of holding her.

Finally we arrived and I got her out of the car and put her into my bed room. I tried to lay her down but she clutched onto me..

"**No…."** Bella looked to me breathlessly.

"**Jazz…. Do…nt.. Let… Go.. Stay.. Stay… Please"** she started crying even harder, I couldn't take this.

I laid onto her, flipping her onto my body and running my hands on her back and her arms, hugging her tightly, just trying to give her some strength to bring her out of this darkness.

"**What's wrong darlin'? This is killing me, tell me- I'll fix it"**

She took a deep breath **"YOU CAN'T FIX IT!! NO ONE CAN FIX IT" **she screamed at me and then ran to the other side of the room, sitting in the corner, her head down onto her knees and her arms covering the remainder of her face.

I walked over to her, dropping to my knees.

"**Please Jazz, don't. Please." **She was really upset and scared, but of me? Why?

"**Darlin' I love you, please… let me in"** I outstretched my arms to her and she shook her head.

"**I can't… its too hard… "** she was hyperventilating now.

"**What? Why?" **I inched a little closer.

"**Stay where you are, PLEASE!.. You'll hurt me, hurt me like he did."**

"**Hurt you? I'd never do that darlin' I'm trying to console you. Who's hurting you? Tell me" **

She looked up at me with her beat red eyes and face. **"E…Ed.. Edward"**

She wrapped her arms around herself and started rocking back and forth.

The guy from the coffee shop? It couldn't be.

"**The guy from today?"** she nodded her head, trying to stand but collapsing in the process.

I managed to catch her before she hit the ground.

She passed out and I picked her up and put her on the bed, thinking about what I was going to do to protect her from him.

He's definitely no good and he's dangerous to make this strong woman before me crumble so easily.

He's not getting near her alone ever again, if it's the last thing I do.

*****EPOV**

The stupid blond took her hand.. Took her hand!

"**Well, good sir, if you wouldn't mind leaving so that we could too. I've got some time to make up to my Darlin' here."**

The nerve of this guy. Doesn't he realize I can kill him?

Isabella knows I can, she flinched. I walked past them and got into my car before they realized what I drove.

I decided to see where they were going. I watch them as they walk down the street past my car.


	10. Fifteen

DON'T OWN TWILIGHT OR THE CHARACTERS. 

I will add other POVs. Not sure who's to add into the story though. Alice's? Peter's?Mike's?Angela's?

Let Me Know.. I wont update with one more Chapter without some feedback! 

Enjoy for now!

LEMONS!

*****EPOV**

How can she stand him touching her? It doesn't matter now, soon she'll be mine. I grabbed the gun from my glove box.

Yes, very soon! They got into a nice car. I can't tell if its his or Isabella's. They start driving and here I go, following them.

They stop at a nice house and I make a mental note of the number while driving by.

The weekend goes by, and it looks like they haven't left the house. He's really milking that time with her. Not anymore.

*****BPOV**

I awake with a raspy throat and….. Alone? I start freaking out. I don't know where I am. All I know is Edward could've taken me from Jasper.

Oh No, Jasper! He is okay?

That means Edwards coming in here soon!

I start having a panic attack and in runs my knight in shining armour, in nothing but a towel, snugly wrapped around his waist and soaking wet.

.

"**Hey Bells, you okay babe?"** rushing to my side **"Hey, he wont get you here. Your completely safe. Don't worry darlin'"** he wrapped his arms around me and I snuggled close to his chest, not wanting any space between us.

He was breathing calmly.

"**Jazz, what time is it?"** I moved from underneath his body to look at his face.

He shifted down towards mine and gave me a light kiss, **"Its 7 in the mornin."**

He smiled **"Nice to see you awake finally, I was wondering when those brown eyes were going to make an appearance" **

"**It's 7am on a Saturday and your awake?"** I shook my head and tried to get up.

He realized what I was doing and helped me up. **"Darlin'"** he wrapped his arms around me** "It's not Saturday, its Monday sweetheart"**

"**What? Your telling me I just blew off two fucking days of work and you couldn't fucking wake me up?"** I was pissed. I thought of hitting him but I saw his eyes dropped.

"**Don't worry. I called Angela using your phone and told her you were feeling sick. She covered for you this weekend, no problem."**

I pushed him away from me. **"Darlin' you were having some real terrors in your sleep, you would wake for a few minutes but then drift off to sleep and repeating the whole process over and over again. I couldn't let you go to work like that."**

I felt a warm sensation within me. My eyes teared up, **"You… stayed? You heard everything?"**

He nodded his head and wrapped his arms around me. **"The only time…" **he took a breath **"The only time you weren't screaming in horror and pain was when I was laying down beside you, wispering sweet nothings in your ear, telling you.. I was here.. And… that… I Love you" **

I put my hands on either side of his face, and kissed him deeply. **"****Jazz, I love you too."**

I kissed him again and he made me walk backwards to the bed. Starting his assault on my neck.

"**No baby, this morning its not about me, its about you… my knight in shining armour" **I made him lay down on the bed..

"**No touching, just watching.. Understand"** he swallowed loudly and nodded his head.

"**Stay lying down and watch, until I tell you otherwise."**

I took 6 steps from the bed and began stripping, slowly.

First I guided my hands down to my hips, sliding my fingers underneath the band of the PJ pants and slowly sliding them down my legs. When they hit the floor I put my hands on my ankles and ran them up my legs, over my hips, stomach, chest, my neck and stopping at my hair to run my hands through it, I moaned lightly.

I gave Jasper a "come hither stare" and he was clutching the sheets violently, He was trying not to disobey me.

I smirked at him, **"****Good boy, stay"** I said seductively.

I lifted my shirt from my body and over my head. I threw the shirt to Jasper, hitting him just before his chin. He was breathing deeply now, I could tell, it wouldn't take him long to cum. Just thinking about how hard he was, it was making me want to rush but I knew better. I decided to torture him a little more.. I

walked back to the bed and pulled the towel from his body. Shit, I'm surprised he stayed on the bed. He was really turned on. His dick was standing straight up. I laughed slightly, got on top of him and grinded my center into his hard, twitching dick.

**Belllla… I can't take much more of this… please.. Ride me now."** He growled.

I stood above his head and pushed my underwear to my ankles, lifting one foot and kicked them free. I then sat on his face.

"**Start making me crazy cowboy"** he purred and started twirling his tongue on my clit, I grinded into his face in response to his aggressive tongue. He growled again and started applying more pressure to my clit.

I got off him abruptly and he gave me a death stare, **"It isn't about me today cowboy."** I slid down his body and he took a deep breath.

I placed his dick just from my entrance, **"Now, close your eyes and focus on what I'm doing to you"**

I started to slowly slid my body onto his dick. **"Fuuuuu-ccck"** he was already incoherent.

I'm glad to know he's not the only one out of his mind. I kept a very slow rythum dragging out the sensations, tighting my center making the experience much more fullfilling for him.

He started growling.. And bucked his hips up trying to speed up my movements.

I jumped off him. **"I didn't tell you to move cowboy." **

His eyes snapped open and he sat up, **"Darlin' please continue, I just lost control for a second, I'm sorry."**

"**Fine, sit there, arms behind your head. And watch, nothing more. Do Not Move"**

I stood in front of him and let my hand slid down to my pussy. I started rubbing circles on my clit. I looked at Jasper who was eyes were dark and almost completely shut..

He was watching me intently. I started moaning like crazy and I saw his dick twitch. He bit his lips and ran a hand through his hair, pulling it slightly.

"**No more trying to buck me here.. Or you'll be left to tend to yourself, understand me?"** he nodded and I began slowly riding his length again.

This time, even slower than the first time.. **"Bellllla…. Pl… pl.." **he was really losing it.

"**Tell me what you want cowboy"** I began sucking his neck and made my pelvic bones meet his.

"**I…gon…na…. cum… moment…" **correction, he officially has lost how to form complete English sentences.

I quickened my pace on his dick for 2 seconds and stopped to slow again, he growled loudly.

"**Fuck woman… make me cum now. I can't hold it in anymore.. The slower you go the harder it gets"**

I kept my slow pace for another 5 seconds **"Hold my hips in place babe" **he put his perfect hands on my hips and I began violently riding his dick, so hard that my breasts were bouncing up and down so hard I thought they were going to fall off.

I placed my hands on his shoulders and kept riding him even harder, he shut his eyes and I felt the pressure building in his dick.

"**Bellllla.. Godd… damnnnit…"** I felt his warm cum shoot into me as I kept the pressure of my own orgasm back..

He flipped us over and was hovering over me with his dick still inside of me.** "How do you feel now?" **I kissed his nose.

"**Ama..amazing. You are perfect."** he began driving into me.

"**Stop." **I pushed him off of me and he let me.

"**Why? Its your turn to receive some pleasure darlin'"** he started rubbing circles on my clit.

"**No, you deserved that. Now, I have to get to work."** he sat on me before I had the chance to get up

"**No, you have the day off, you are going to take a shower and stay here. I have to go into the office for a few hours and sort out something that happened on the weekend. Nothing serious. I have to be there in half an hour and I'll be back by 12. We can go to lunch or do whatever you want." **He kept rubbing my clit and I suddenly didn't want him to go to work. I flipped him onto his back.

"**What if I want you now and not later?"**

He got up, **"baby, you can have me the rest of the day and all night.. But right now, as much as I want to make you feel good, I have to go to work" **he began getting dressed. I put my hands on his chest and leaned into his ear, sucking on It softly,

"**Just know you have a very horny woman waiting for your touch"**

I gave him a chaste kiss on his lips **"Have a good day Cowboy, I Love You"**

He wrapped his arms around me and deeply breathed my scent in. **"I Love You too"**

I kissed his neck and got into the shower so he could leave without further interference from me.

"**Darlin' come out for a second."** I stepped out the shower and he looked at my naked, wet body..

"**Here's my card. Go and treat yourself to a nice day, message, clothes.. Whatever"** he set it on the counter. "**When I come back you are going to be ravished.. "**

"**I couldn't spend your money Jazz"**

He shook his head **"What's mine is yours now honey. See you later okay?"**

He leaned down and kissed me deeply and groaned a little.

"**Damn it…. I'll see you soon I love you."**

"**I love you too"** with that he left the bathroom and within 5 seconds I heard him shut the door downstairs and locking it.

His car started and I jumped back into the shower.

*****EPOV**

Finally that stupid blond leaves the house but Isabella hasn't come out yet. He pulls out and leaves. Perfect, she could be in there alone.

I remembered what Rosalie showed me, how to pick a lock. God knows I've locked myself out enough times.. I approached the house, I realized I didn't want to be caught at the front door, so I decided to hop the fence and pick the lock for the shed, I ended up breaking the door and getting some rope.

I then headed to the rear door. Picked the lock, it worked within 3 seconds.

Ha! What a joke, I heard the shower running upstairs, she was here! Finally, I can take her back. I walked up the stairs quietly and sneaking into the open room. I sat in the chair behind the door.

I heard the shower shut off and I could hear her soft foot steps coming into the room. She only had a towel on. I decided to make my move, I stalked up behind her….

ripped her towel away and covered her mouth with one hand while my one arm wrapped around her waist, I pushed her towards the bed.. Perfect this would be easier then I thought. She was face down into the pillows.

I couldn't have her see me yet. I held her down on the bed with one arm on her upper back and quickly got my dick out of my pants with the other. I hovered over top of her and slid my dick in.. I couldn't believe how well she still fit me. She bucked into my dick moaning..

"**Jazz…"** Yeah no 'Jazz' here.

I began drilling into her pretty hard… I made a mental count of every time she said his name. She tried to reach for my body and trying to turn around. I made quick work of tying ends of the rope to the bed posts.. I decided now was a good time than any..

I flipped her body over and grabbed her hands instantly, her eyes were still shut due to her orgasm. I tied her hands quickly and her eyes fluttered open.

"**Jazz, what are you doing"**

"**Oh no.. No .. No no! I have to be dreaming. Oh no."** She was so scared and it was making me so damn horny.

I smiled at her** "Hello Isabella, I didn't know Jazz has had a chance in you. You've been a naughty girl.. And what happens to naughty girls?"**

I chuckled **"They get punished"**

She started crying. **"Shhhh. Its okay Isabella, its just me. You know you can trust me right?"** I let my evil smirk shine through.

I dug into my pocket for my trusty friend. **"Oh look who missed you love"**

I flipped open my shiny knife and begun working on her.

FIFTEEN!

I began cutting into her skin. I loved the way it sounded.

The way she cried out in pain, the way she yelled, begged, pleaded with me to stop.

I put 15 cuts into her, 12 on her body, all over, carving disgusting marks and 3 on her pussy.

He will not want her now and she can come back to me. Yes.

"**Isabella, you are to leave here now, you are not to tell him that I have done this to you.."**

I started fucking her once again, releasing my seed into her,

"**If you tell him, I will not only find you again.. But I will blow off that stupid blond's head. You wouldn't want me to hurt him because you were being stupid now would you?"** She shook her head.** "Good Girl"**

I ripped the sheets from underneath her, wiped off the blood, it hurt her. And I smiled knowing she would remember me.

"**Now get dressed and sit in the corner until I'm done."** she did what she was told.

Ha! Too easy. I found the laundry room and put new sheets on the bed, he will never know what happened.

"**Come on Isabella.. "** leading her out of the room

"**You are not to tell your precious Jazz anything.. You are not to see him and you are not to have sex with him. If you fuck him or see him, I will know and I will make you suffer again and kill him. Understood?"**

She nodded and I let her out the front door, before locking it again. **"Now get into my car… I'm taking you home."** she flinched but got into my car.


	11. And Now

Before I Continue this story… I realize like another reader.. That I don't want **JUST** Bella, Jasper and Edward pov's

I'd like your **help/suggestions **as readers. Who should have a POV next in this story?

Peter… Alice… Mike.. Angela? Rosalie.. Emmett? Carlise.. Esme? The back story to Jasper's past?

I have one more Jasper POV and if I don't get any suggestions I'll just start picking the pov's myself.

So please let me know who you'd like to see next.


	12. Seeing Red

**I dont own twilight or these characters.  
Been recieving message from people, not being happy with the way this story is going and the way that Edward is being portrayed.  
It is a Jasper&Bella pairing... Trust me everything will work out soon for Jasper & Bella... Stay tuned!**

*****  
****JPOV**

Soon as I got to work, I was haunted by Bella's voice.

"**No Edward. Please stop….. You know there is only you, I promise I will love no other but you… stop… it hurts… the blood…. Stop there is blood" **

What did he do to her?

I was going to find out- even if it killed me.

You know what? Fuck it. Its barely after 9am.

Why did I leave her there all alone? After the weekend she just had?

I'm going right back to my Bella.

Stupid.

Stupid.

Stupid.

I picked up my phone, dialling Peter's extension

"**Hey Peter.. I can't be here today. Something's up with my girl and I have to be with her, can you take my shift today"**

I heard a sigh **"Can I stay in my office?"**

"**Of course, what's wrong?"** He was always my brother first and co-worker last.

"**That bitch is annoying. Why haven't you fired her? She irks me, I'd rather not go to your office anymore."**

"**I understand, she gets on my nerves too. Always trying to get into my pants. I swear, she's worse than me."**

Here it comes… **"Seriously? As if someone is worse than you. You mentioned a girl.. So… new girlfriend or just someone to take your mind off being bored?"**

"**No. She's my girlfriend. This time its not about boredom. Trust me, she is far from boring and definitely is a keeper"** I smiled instantly, thinking of my beautiful girl.

"**Yeah, yeah. We'll see. Bring her by sometime this week, alright? I wanna see who's making you dump all your work on me. Send your papers down here so I don't have to deal with bobbly bitch"**

"**Alright, coming down to you." **with that I hung up.

I gathered my files, grabbed my jacket and ran past Jessica, with my long strides- I didn't bother waiting for the elevator.

I took the stairs instead, skipping 4 steps at a time.

I made it to the 8th floor and dropping off the files to Peter. I took off running again and making it to the bottom and to by car in less then 3 minutes. Wow. 9 Floors in under 3 minutes. I'm coming back to you baby, you just wait.

I sped home, what normally would take me about 20 minutes took me 10.

Thankfully, no cops were around. I unlocked the door and ran up the stairs and into my room.

Hmm. The sheets are changed.

"**Bella… Darlin' you around?"** I called out..

Thinking maybe she's just surveying the house. I end up searching the whole house and headed to the garage. I hope she's okay, there isn't a note or anything around.

Pulling out my phone, I called her number.

_Just take the fall, your one of us.. The spotlight is on.._

I chuckled. She was hiding from me?

I called her phone again and listened to where she was.

I made my way to the entrance of the garage and sprung through the door and turning the corner.

"**You can't hide from me Darlin'"** I looked down and there was her phone…

She wouldn't leave it lying on the ground..

Where did she go?

This was not good.

I walked inside and heard the washing machine on. I looked, it was on its first cycle still. So she was here within the last 10 minutes and dropped her phone out front, no note, no nothing.

Something is seriously wrong.

I decided to go through Bella's phone for Angela's number

"**Hey Bella, feeling better?"**

"**Angela, its Jasper. Have you seen Bella at all today?"**

"**Um, no. Why? Is something wrong? And why do you have Bella's phone?"**

"**Yes, shes not here at my place.. She didn't leave a note and she left her phone at the front step of my house. I just started dating her."**

"**Oh.. Umm, she might've just went home and thought she would make it back to your place before you… she is a girl after all"**

"**Oh okay, maybe that's it. Thanks Angela.""Yup, call me when you see her."**

"**Will do. Thanks again sweetheart."**

Ahh, that's where she was. I did after all have about 2 and ½ hours until she would come back. I left a note for her saying I'd be at Harry's and left my keys for her.

I stepped out of the house and made the walk to Harry's.

Angela was working today, sweet. Oh shit. I must have called her while she was working.

"**Sorry about that Angela I forgot you'd be working… can I have the usual?"** I tipped my hat.

"**No worries Jasper. Of course you can. Coffee like you like it?"** She smiled at me

"**Like always sweetheart.. And can you throw in some pie?"**

She laughed. **"****And some humble pie for Major Panic Attack"** she went off to the kitchen and brought me back a coffee.

I took a long sip.. **"Mmm. Thanks. This is great"**

"**Fresh like always. So your dating Bella?"** She took a seat across from me.

"**Yeah, bumped into her one day and on that same day was in here and saved her from a douchebag. Went on a date and here we are."** I smiled.

"**Wow, someone made it past the wall of Bella"** She laughed a little. **"I'm glad she found someone. You're a pretty nice guy.. So if it had to be anyone…I'm glad its you"**

"**Why thank you, you are truly a sweetheart"**

"**Oh shush. Just promise you'll come out with us sometime okay? We don't need you keeping our Bella hostage or anything." **she laughed.

"**Don't worry. I won't."**

With that said she got up. **"Excuse me… customer"**

"**By all means."**

After about 15 minutes she came back and gave me my food. I ate in silence and looked at my watch quarter to noon. Where was Bella? Maybe she just read my note and she's on her way here. Yeah, maybe that's it.

It was 12:30 by the time I asked for my bill.** "Hey Angela, if Bella comes by tell her I'll be at the house okay? And can I get the bill?" **

"**Yeah, I'll tell her. And Its been paid for Jasper."**Huh. **"Do you know who?"**

"**Yeah guy in the far corner."**

"**Thanks Angela. See you tomorrow""Yup, see you."**

I looked to the far corner and saw a coffee mug lifted into the air… seen that evil smirk on the fucker's face.. He pointed at me and motioned for me to go to him.

I walked over to him, seeing red again.

I really wanted to drill this guy, break his neck or jaw.. Just something to make him back the fuck off.

"**Meet me outside blondie"** he got up from his seat and stalked out of the door.

What. The. Fuck? I walked outside and he walked over to the corner of Harry's and a ally.

"**Look, man to man.. I don't want to be telling you this."**

Man To Man? More Like Scum to Cowboy. Myself being the Cowboy of course.

"**Tell me what?"** I spit at him coldly.

"**Isabella has decided to see me exclusively again. She didn't want to tell you. Didn't want to crush you.. So my love just rushed out of your house and went home. She said she didn't want to look at you, knowing that she belongs with me.."**

"**Yeah right"** I laughed in his face, trying to hold back the anger.

"**I'm not kidding. I didn't know she wanted to get back together. I thought she was with you after what I saw a few weeks ago. But she called me and wanted to get together.. So we did. She asked me to call it off with you. Here, it's a letter from her.. She couldn't stand doing it in person or on the phone so.. Its what she thought was right"** He handed me a small envelope.

"**Sorry, I wish I didn't have to do this man"** he slapped my shoulder and I snapped.

"**Fuck You Asshole"** I snapped my arm back and socked him in the nose. Scummy Bitch fell to the ground onto his knees.

I laughed as I felt the anger come through, I snapped my fist back and knocked him in the mouth. He fell backwards onto his ass. I pounded into his body this time, his arms covering his head. I loved how the rage flowed through me. It was a relief.

"**Don't fucking touch me, you creepy psychopath."** My Arm cocked back again aiming for his face when I realized someone had grabbed me.

"**Jay, what the hell are you doing?"** The voice snapped me out of my rage

"**Peter… the problem I spoke about earlier… this is it"** pointing to Edward.

"**Okay, stop lets go."** He was now tugging me towards his car.

"**Jasper, jealously isnt very nice. You should work on that and stay away from Isabella. She doesn't need you and your anger issues around her. Your dangerous, maybe she saw that and came back to me. The SAFE choice."** He waved and stalked off.

That fucking bastard. He seriously thinks he's Safe? If he only knew what Bella goes through…

I shook my head while Peter drove me home.

"**Bro what is wrong with you? I thought we dealt with this? I can't keep saving you from your slip ups. You would've killed him or worse, you would've killed the cops trying to pull you off of him."**

"**Shut Up Peter"** Why is he doing this to me, fuck off. I can't be bothered with this.

"**No. You need to realize. Me and Charlotte can't do this anymore Jasper. We can't keep saving you. We love you.. But.. The anger… it's a big problem of yours""PETER IF YOU VALUE MY SANITY THEN SHUT THE FUCK UP!"**

He grabbed my arm **"Jasper, you remember what happened the last time."**

"**I don't want to remember last time… okay? I made a Mistake.. It will never happen again."** I have to focus on the future. Which apparently, I'd never have with Bella.

"**Jasper, please stay here.. I'll come by later and we'll have chipolte night okay?"** I opened the car door

"**Yeah yeah.. See you and Char later."** I slammed the car door and jammed my key into the front door, after I had slammed it shut I punched a hole in the wall. I walked upstairs and ripped my jacket off.

Fucking Scumbag.

I ripped open the letter. It definitely looked like her writing

_Jazz,_

_I'm so sorry. I met with Edward and realized that he is my soul mate. I cannot live without him. I'm just sorry that you have to be in the middle of this. Please don't try to call me or see me. It will make all of this easier. PLEASE FORGET ME and I'll do the same._

_Bella_

My heart felt like it was being ripped into a million pieces. I knew it was too good to be true.

I punched a hole into the wall. I got so angry I blacked out.

When I snapped back to reality It was to Peter, he had me pinned to the floor.

"**Jay, What did I fucking tell you?"**


	13. Needs

I don't own twilight or the characters!

*****BPOV**

I woke up in a haze. Everything around me was blurry. Ugh. I felt sleepy once again, what is going on?

"**Shh, everything is fine love. Just relax"** a voice called out to me

How is everything okay when everything around me is blurry? I fell into a dark pit and was dreaming of my blond southern cowboy.

It was sunny, the wind hitting my face like a wild, winter air. It felt so good against my skin. I looked over to my left, the man before me was beautiful with his high cheek bones, plum lips just waiting to be kissed, those ice blue eyes glistening with love. The way the wind fought with his messy, blond hair. I was in awe of myself. He was so perfect.

I looked out to the ocean. The same color as his eyes. I felt his arms wrap around me, I sighed. I started tracing out his arms and hands, trying to remember every single scar, bump, line and the way his skin felt on mine. I never wanted this moment to end. He leaned into my hair and took a deep breath. That sent chills down my spine..

***JPOV

I sat in my front yard. Laying on the cool grass. I loved how the blades of grass was tickling my neck and back. It was a nice, relaxing feeling.

I thought about last weeks stupid conflict with Edward- I did feel pretty fuckin good after punching him a couple of times, the bitch deserved it. Just lying down like a pussy, not a real man. I guess that's to be expected from a bitch who hurts an innocent loving darlin girl..

I even had to reposition Peter's nose. Its great to know I can still smash in my best friend's face, even though he didn't do anything but be there for me. All those times on the play ground years ago, I had to punch him daily for the shit he would get me into. I've even had to bust a few blood vessels in his eyes and my fists for hurting Charlotte once.

Apparently I nearly hit Charlotte. How that was ever possible to nearly hurt her.. I'm not sure. I don't think I could ever live with myself if I did that. She was near and dear to my heart, not to mention my mama would have my behind if I ever hit a woman.

Know what its like hiding out? I do. Edward tried getting the cops after me saying I was "flying off the handle" and "needed to be locked up" Yeah right. He's the one who needed to be locked up. There's something about him that isn't sitting right with me. I know he hurt Bella but there is something else going on. I can't figure it out, but I will. Cops never did anything about me, saying there wasn't any proof to link me to Edward's unforeseen beating.

Jake told me to watch myself, knowing my past history and said for now.. I was in the clear… He didn't want to put cuffs on me and throw me in jail. He really was looking out for me.

***EPOV

"**Edward, I think its best if we head back to Forks. I can't keep hiding this from everyone. Bella will soon get too strong and tell someone about this 2nd**** attack."** My Father's worried… but why? I haven't done anything wrong. I just did what felt good.

"**I think we need to up your dose and make sure you're taking it everyday and if you aren't I'll be adminstering it myself daily.. Its that or jail. Would you rather be free to do what you want? Or stuck behind bars being some jailbait to some guy? Or maybe even be stuck in a padded cell for the rest of your life?"** I shuddered at the thought.

"**Okay, fine up the dose, I don't care.**" I shrugged my shoulders. He stepped forward, gave me a shot and a slap on my other arm and with that I headed to my room trying to get some sleep.

*** BPOV

I awoke in a cold sweat. EWW how gross.

I got up out of bed and had a Bella moment, effectively still wrapped in my sheets and half falling out of bed, but, oh wait! Instead of my bed saving me, I managed to have my head break my fall onto the floor. UGH. Stupid floor.. Stupid Bed!

I hopped into the shower, after I was sure I wasn't going to be dizzy or pass out. I washed my body carefully.. Avoiding all the stitches. They were coming out today. Thank god. I don't think I can handle looking at my body like this… Carlise had insisted on stitching me up. Yeah, he's covering for his son again, what else is fucking new? I just want the Cullen's FAR… FAR… FAR away from me.

I need to talk to Jasper. I hate being away from him. It's like my heart doesn't beat, that I can't breathe without him. I really do love him and Its something I never wanted to happen to me again.

He makes it so easy… he's so warm and funny, smart and strong.. He's compassionate beyond belief and he knows when to come too close and stand back. He's like my perfect half. Ugh. I have to go to him. Today. Tell him all that has happened.

And then possibly beat the fucking crap out of Edward. I want to kill him. Actually, killing him is too easy - its actually letting him off the hook.

I should hurt him, hurt him like he's hurt me.

Drag out his pain and suffering to the point where he wants to die.

Edward is going to pay, and I know just how to hurt him the most.

** Any suggestions on what Bella's revenge should be? ** 

I have a strong urge to write tonight so I may update another chapter or few… depending on the feedback and the ideas that pop into my head.


	14. Bringing It All Back

_I don't own twilight or the characters!_

_*Enjoy, I will post another chapter tomorrow night. Please leave reviews. Thanks for the support and feedback so far!*_

I made my way to see Jasper. I didn't care if he was home or not, I just had to go there.

I made it to the train station in time to catch a train going East. Thank god. I put on my ipod and started listening to Muse. They always drown out the babble of annoying people.

I got off near where Jasper lives. I know he's near Granny's.

I just started walking, not caring about taking the bus, or how much pain I felt. I just knew I needed him.

***** JPOV**

I decided that thinking about this shit was only making my pain worse so I picked up My guitar and let it do the talking. I started singing a familiar song

_Ain't no sunshine when she's 's not warm when she's 't no sunshine when she's goneAnd she's always gone too long anytime she goes away. _

_Wonder this time where she's gone,Wonder if she's gone to stayAin't no sunshine when she's goneAnd this house just ain't no home anytime she goes away._

_Hey, I ought to leave the young thing alone,But ain't no sunshine when she's gone, only darkness 't no sunshine when she's gone,And this house just ain't no home anytime she goes away._

Man, ain't true. I kept strumming random cords, seeing if I could write a song but I was having major writers block

"**I have my past and so do you… We walk a broken road, baby, all you need me and all I need is you"** That sounds lame, what the fuck is wrong with my brain today?

"**Jazzz"** Whoa, am I hearing shit?** "Oh Jazz"** I snapped my head up to look at the girl who was saying my name.. It was her!

I dropped my guitar. Shit Sorry Bessy!I sprinted to that girl who had my heart. Who was right in front of me.. Good god.

"**Jazz, I'm so sorry I left. It was Edward. Edward made me leave, he made me stay at my place, not to say anything to you, to see you… to do anything with you!"** She was sobbing and trembling in my arms.

"**So, you didn't write me a 'Dear John' letter did you Darlin?"** I held her close to me.

"**What?"** she took a step back, on her tippy toes so she could stare into my eyes. **"What are you talking about Cowboy, I never wrote you a Dear John Letter."**

I took a seat on the grass, motioning her to join me. **"According to Edward and the writing, you did. Saying you wanted to be with Edward."**

She took a seat in front of me. Her legs intertwining with mine. It was sweet. "**Are you crazy Jasper Whitlock? You actually thought I'd let you go? Especially after just 15 minutes before we parted I told you I love you?"**

I started into her deep brown eyes, taking her hands into mine and squeezing them. Praying to god that I wasn't fucking dreaming. I'll admit though, if it was a dream it was a damn good one.

"**I never second guessed your feelings darlin' just thought if you wanted to be with that scum, I'd step back and let you be with him. Its sort of like that King Solomon story where the two women are fighting over the baby.. The baby was going to end up being cut in half.. Whichever woman loved the baby more would let it go." **I took a breath.

"**I wasn't going to cut you in half Darlin' I couldn't bare the thought of putting you through that, especially by my selfishness. I love you too much to hurt you."**

She leaned into me and gave me the sweetest kiss I could've ever received.

Taking her hand, **"Now, lets go inside Darlin'.. we've got to have dinner and talk."** She grabbed my hand and squeezed tightly. Oddly enough, its exactly how my heart felt.

***BPOV

We made dinner together, it was a pretty simple dinner.. For two simple people it couldn't have been better.

He made a garden salad & found some red wine and I made some penne pasta.

We sat down and ate in silence. Just staring at each other.

Following dinner, I went to clear the table. **"Darlin' its bad enough I let you cook, you are a guest here and my girlfriend, now.. Just enjoy your wine and head into the living room. I'll finish things here and meet you in there alright?"**

Freaking drawl! **"Alright, don't be too long now." **I gave him a chaste kiss and he smirked at me.

I turned on my heel and headed to the living room. I started taking more of the house in.

Upon walking into the living room, I noticed a bunch of photographs on the wall.

I noticed they all a the same backgrounds. All taken in the country somewhere obviously.

The first had a man in a dark shirt, dark wash jeans and looked like a spitting image of Jasper. He even had the trademark smile of his. I chalked it up to his dad. Right beside him was a slender blond haired woman, with a twinkle in her eyes, holding the man's hand. Wearing a simple white summer dress. She looked so beautiful. They looked so happy.

I felt arms wrap around me. **"Those are my parents. Dad really didn't want to take this picture. It's the summer before I was born." **He smiled. **"He kept saying how he felt like he was a clown. Getting all dressed up. Nana said mama would chase him around.. But dad, being the stubborn man he is.. Made her a deal. She had to wear that dress.." **he pointed at the picture **"with no makeup"** he laughed **"and he would wear a nice dress shirt."**

He pointed to the next one. His mother and a little baby. They were sitting outside on a swing. **"Mama and me, I was about 2 months old. Apparently, to get me sleeping through the night mama and dad would take turns sitting on that swing with me and sing 'til I fell asleep."**

The next one was his mother and a little boy running after each other. **"Dad took this picture. He loved anytime mama laughed or smiled. I swear, I have 2 boxes of photos from maybe one day of him snapping pictures." **he laughed.

"**This one. My parents and my brother- my partner in crime. Peter."** His fathers arms wrapped around his mother, and they were looking at their kids. Sitting in the shade to the right of them.

"**This last one was taken a week before mama died."** It was 3 pictures of Jasper and his mother. Both wearing dark washed jeans and a white tee. Jasper wearing a cowboy hat. She was still beautiful, wearing no makeup whatsoever. Her blond hair almost hanging down into her eyes. The same shade of blond Jasper's hair is. Her eyes, ice blue. Smiling so big, hugging her son.

The next, they were laughing. **"This one, was sort of stupid. I think dad and Peter were in a debate on how to make sweet potato pie.. Me and mama just always laughed at their bickering."**

The last one, Jasper had his arm around his mother and she was holding his hand. Smiling. A tear ran down my cheek. **"You guys look so happy and so carefree. You have so much love In this one picture."** he wiped the tear from my face.

"**You see here, that band and that necklace.." **he turned me around and headed to the couch.

He picked up his left hand and pointed to the ring and then the necklace. **"I have never taken it off since that day. It was the day she gave me these." **The ring was a silver band. Almost similar to a wedding band. The necklace was a silver chain wielding a cross with prayer hands in the middle of the cross. They were beautiful.

"**Don't look so sad darlin'. Its just a part of life."** he gave me a small smile.

"**I know, I just wish I could have memories like those. Looks like your family really loves each other."** I put my hand on his shoulder. He leaned into my touch.

"**We did and still do. There isn't a day where I don't see or talk to my brother. My dad and I make a point to talk once every few days."** He smiled. **"Darlin' no family is like the other. Memories will live on in your mind, pictures or video. It doesn't matter. What matters is that family and people who love each other make memories regardless if technology can capture it or not."** He lifted me onto his lap.

"**Don't get upset darlin'.. we'll make our own memories."** He smirked. **"Don't worry. I'll make sure we take lots of pictures and videos alright?"** I laughed **"Your silly."** He stroked his hand across my cheek. **"Anything to hear your musical laughter or to see that beautiful smile of yours"** He smirked and kissed me.

"**Okay, want to hear about my family?**" He nodded **"Go ahead princess."**

I took a deep breath.

"**My parents were high school sweethearts, they married just after they graduated school. My father went to police school and my mom couldn't decide what she wanted to do so she picked some courses to take in College. About a year and a half after they married. They had me." **I took another deep breath. **"When I was about 5 I remember Renee telling me we were moving and that Dad was staying behind. It wasn't until I got a little older, I realized I was the reason they divorced."** Jasper put his arms around me and began rubbing soothing circles into my back. **"After spending most of my childhood and some of my teenage years with Renee- being the mother rather then the child. I decided to live with my father and let Renee have her newlywed years with her new husband.""Don't get me wrong, I love her and she's my best friend. I just didn't want to be the reason why she suffered again"** I was now fighting back years.

"**When I was 16, I moved to Washington to my Father's place. He still lived in the same house my parents had bought after they were married."** I almost started laughing. **"It was great. Charlie wasn't in my face. He was just a dad. He was exactly like me. Our relationship was so easy. It wasn't really love-filled in a way where we always hugged and said I Love You. It was the little things that counted, you know?" **He nodded. Paying attention to everything I was saying. **"The only time we hit a rough patch was when I began… I began seeing Edward."**

"**Darlin' we don't have to talk about him.."** I put my finger on his lips.

"**No, he's part of the reason why I don't have at least my father with me. So please."** He grabbed my hand finger from his lips and turned my hand and kissed into my palm and then my wrist.

"**So, when I began seeing him.. A few months after I moved into Charlie's, my mother died with her husband Phil in a plane accident going to the congo. My mom was on this whole sight-seeing nature trip." **I started Crying

"**Babe, we can stop tonight. I don't like seeing you like this, crying and upset.. Please" **He looked worried.

"**No its fine." **I continued, **"So, when that happened, my dad spent more time at the station- he was the police chief in town. He would leave before I woke up for school and would come in really late. We stopped talking and I felt too alone. I spent my nights and weekends at the Cullen's place with Edward. Without them, I wouldn't have gotten through that rough patch."**

"**My dad was still struggling with her death and I tried to help him. He started coming around and we became much closer. He started hugging me whenever I would leave, saying I Love you. He would come into my room before he went to work, whispering I Love you and kissing my cheek." **I smiled at those memories. Charlie, he could be so loving and tough at the same time.

"**And then, one day I went to spend a weekend at the Cullen's. Dad was going fishing with his best friend Harry. I don't think they ever really caught anything. It was more so an excuse to talk and hang out, trying not to give the boys on the res a hard time." **

"**That weekend marked the end of everything I thought of love and family. See, I thought of the Cullen's as my second family and I always knew if something ever happened to Charlie, I would never be truly alone." **

"**That Saturday night Edward defiled me in ways that is inhuman. He really broke me down and made me feel so small, ugly, unloved… he made me feel pain. He, tried to subdue me and make me so weak. He raped me that night. ." **

"**They had a family meeting the next day. I don't think Edward's siblings and his mother knew what was going on. They told me no one would believe anything I said regarding what happened and said that if I kept my legs shut it wouldn't have happened. Telling me Edward didn't rape me and it was my plan to try and run them out of town.. Which couldn't have been further from the truth.." **


	15. Finally Out

**I don't own twilight or the characters!**

"**I couldn't forget what happened. I broke up with Edward that night while leaving and that's when it happened." **I took a breath trying to calm my panic attack, Jasper's eyes full of concern, giving him a tiny kiss on the cheek. **"I promise, if you can just listen I'm almost done."**

"**Before I broke up with him, I thought he was trying to make amends and I was stupid so I let him. It lead to him raping me once again and abusing me in the worst way, leaving scars. His father fixed me up, being a doctor and all.. "**

"**He had the nerve to tell me, I had done it to myself that Edward didn't do anything to me except sleep with me which apparently I was on top for. And I was just trying to justify my actions, for if my father found out to say that he raped me and did it to me." **

"**That night I called my father frantically, I made him rush from the station, I told him what happened and he was a block from the Cullen's when it happened."**

The tears were coming down like acid rain, burning my eyes, Jasper pulled me into a tight hug, rubbing his hands on my back and humming softly. After a few minutes I pulled from his embrace.

"**I was sitting outside on the porch waiting for him, trying to stay away from Edward and his father. Turns out, the roads were too wet for driving that fast. He wasn't wearing his seatbelt and the cruiser crashed into a telephone pole, ejecting my father from the car. I actually heard his siren and then the crash. I called his cell phone..I was worried… And he picked up. 'Bells, I'm hurt… get dr. Cullen, I'm outside of the car, block away.'.." **

"**He sounded winded and in a lot of pain. It happened in a blur.. I yelled for Carlisle and we made it to him. I remember holding Dad's jacket and his hand.. Telling him he was going to be fine. Esme was trying to help Carlisle with the bleeding, Edward was on the phone with an ambulance and his sisters were trying to tear me away from my father, saying I needed to give their parents space to work on him. To save him"**

"**5 hours later in the hospital. I Finally got to see him. I curled up on the bed beside him and he laughed. He laughed. Said I was always curling up to him as a kid. I told him I was sorry for making him rush, he told me not to be so hard on myself saying that I did the right thing and he was glad he slipped off the road because his gun would've killed Edward."**

"**I volunteered to go home and get a spare for him to shoot him. He laughed again, wincing through the pain like a stubborn idiot. Telling me that there was plenty of time to shoot him when he got better." **

"**Carlisle came in after 10 minutes telling me Dad had to rest. I leaned over to kiss his cheek and he kissed me back." **I took another breath and put my hand on Jasper's shoulder. **"****That night, Carlisle said his injuries were much worse then thought. He was bleeding internally and they couldn't find it fast enough… he died 3 hours after I left him." **

The flood gates were about to explode I had to get this last thing out… **"I remember….. What he said… 'Get some sleep tonight, tell Harry I'm fine, and I'll see you tomorrow Babygirl. Call Harry Or Sam.. To come get you, okay? Cullen is not driving you. Bells. I Love you Honey.' he gave me a bear hug and brushed the hair out of my face." **

I began crying profusely. It was like I was being told he was gone all over again. I remember the look on Esme's face, tears streaming down her cheeks… I ran right to her to be consoled. Rosalie and Emmett were holding Edward back, dragging him out of the hospital.

Japer pulled me into a bear hug, **"Darlin' I can't believe… Your father loved you as much as you loved him. I can't believe that bastard cost you that much. He won't ever hurt you again babe. Never. I will die before he ever hurts you again. You hear me?" **I nodded, trying to get even closer to Jasper.. I could barely breathe, thanks to the hug and crying uncontrollably.

After what seemed like hours, I moved from Jasper's shoulder and he kept his grip tight on me. **"Darlin'" **I kissed him and had to get up. My body was so stiff, it felt like I slept on a hardwood floor after a night of partying, with no blankets and not even a pillow. I stretched and winced. **"owww." **

"**Darlin' come here"**.. Jasper began to take off my sweatshirt. **"Let me take care of those aches." **I sat down on the couch and he sat behind me, beginning to massage the knots out of my body. It felt so good, so relaxing.

"**Feel better?" **I nodded. **"Okay, do you want to go to bed or would you like a bubble bath?" **How did I deserve such a man?

"**Bubble bath, then sleep.. But only if you join me." **I smiled.

"**If that's what you want, then you shall have."** he picked me up off the couch, bridal style and set me in the bedroom. Starting the bath.

"**Okay, come on in here Darlin'"** he called. I walked into the bathroom. Candles were lit. **"Feel the temperature. I don't want it to be too hot for you." **I took off my sock and put my foot in. It felt as warm as his body. **"Its perfect." **I turned so my back faced his. I took off my clothes and stepped in.

My shoulders were met with his hands and a calm smelling body wash. He washed my body, I wasn't going to show him the new developing scars yet. I washed his body and I got out wrapping a towel around my body. **"Wow, not letting the gentleman do anything for the pretty li' lady, now are you?" **he smirked.

"**Well, the gentleman does too much for the pretty li' lady already. She's feeling a little spoiled."** I imitated his drawl and walked out of the bathroom. I found a shirt of his and some PJ Pants and sat on the bed waiting for him. He came back out wearing a pair of boxers sitting very low on his hips.

"**See something to your likin' li' lady?" **He smiled that crooked smile. Walking over to me.

"**That I do good sir. But tonight, is about being good, not about being bad."** I grabbed his upper arm and pulled him towards my body lying down on the bed.

"**This isn't being good darlin'"** he began pushing up a sleeve and kissing my shoulder.

"**I know but we are going to be good tonight." **I put my hand under his chin bringing his face to mine. I kissed his nose and began kissing his neck.

"**Keep doing things to drive me crazy and we won't be good for much longer" **He began purring. It was similar to the growling I felt before, but this was much sexier. Not an edge of anger to it. I then stopped assaulting his neck and began kissing his smooth lips. Our breathing became irregular and I was starting to think of how many times he could make me scream his name..

He broke the kiss. **"****Darlin' I think we should stop." **I groaned. **"I know darlin' but we've had a rough few weeks and I'd rather spend the night sleeping in your arms and yours in mine.. We can do this another time.. I love you li' lady." **he peeled back the covers and kissed my forehead.

"**I love you too my cowboy"** I grabbed his hand and kissed his knuckles.

I fell asleep with his arms around me and I was breathing in his sweet scent. There isn't any other place I'd rather be for the rest of my life.


	16. Effortless

I don't own twilight or the characters!

** 8 Months later **

***JPOV

Thud… Thud…. Thud.

I jumped out of bed. What the fuck was going on? I looked to my right and my girl wasn't sleeping beside me. **"Babe can you get that? I'm stuck in here with shampoo and soap in my eyes." **That sweet voice called to me.

"**Yeah, take your time honey"** I grabbed a pair of jeans. This had better been good. Waking me up from bed, fucking bastards better be armed to prevent me from killing them. Walking down the stairs I was buttoning up my shirt.

I flung the door open to Rosalie and Peter.

"**What the fuck have you been doing? Did you forget we were coming over today? Its 2 in the afternoon!" **Freaking Family.

"**Yeah, yeah. Come here Roz" **I grasped her tightly and swung her around. **"Still gorgeous as ever. Have you seen my dad lately? Or maybe you were the one to put him in the hospital." **I winked at her.

"**Yeah Fuck you Whitlock."** She punched me in the arm. She never changed. **"Oh, my fiancée will be over a little later. He had some work to finish up. Where is your girlfriend, I can't wait to meet her."**

"**In the shower Roz, give her a bit. Peter, nice to see Charlotte doesn't let you go hungry" **I laughed, giving him a bear hug. **"Yeah, well your girlfriend makes you smile, you gloomy bastard"** slapping my back **"Okay, where's the beer?"** Some things don't change.

I was glad to have these two be here. I was worried how Rosalie would accept Bella. She's always been overtly protective of me. She's more like a sister, rather than a cousin. I always trust her judgement. She's been right about every single girl I've ever dated. I just hope this time… I got it right. I planned to marry the beautiful, clumsy girl upstairs one day.

"**I'm glad your happy Whitlock. I haven't seen you smile a real smile in so long. I think you've found the right girl. You've never smiled like this or been this happy since aunt Jacqueline was alive" **My mother. I missed her, these times sucked without her but thanks to Bella, the pain I felt wasn't pulling at my heart like it used to. She really took it away.

"**I know Roz. She's amazing, she makes me strive to be a better man. She challenges me, bosses me around.. "** I laughed **"You know, I don't get away with anything?"** we both laughed.

"**Well, someone besides Pete, Uncle Pete and I have to call you out on your shit. You trouble maker." **She punched me again. Freaking Families.

"**Jay, I'm grabbing your lady.. I've got food cooking can you and Roz watch it please?" **He yelled from the top of the stairs.

"**Well Whitlock, time to feed me." **I laughed **"Yeah where's my sweet potato pie woman?"** I lifted her over my shoulder and walked into the kitchen. Carrying the devil woman kicking and screaming.

Yeah, today was going to be a good day.

***BPOV

A quiet knock rapped on the door. Charlotte. I thought

"**Blue Bells.. You decent?" **Never mind, It was Peter.

"**Yeah, come on in Peter" **before I could register his face, he picked me up and kissed both my cheeks.

"**Top of the afternoon milady.. So, how come you aren't downstairs yet?"** he lifted an eyebrow.

"**I was just about to head downstairs when you knocked mister too excited to wait 2 more minutes." **I lightly smacked his head and he feigned hurt. **"Oh you big baby, that didn't hurt. How is Charlotte, is she downstairs?"**

"**No, she'll be meeting us at our Father's place. Picking up last minute things for the potluck and bringing it over there." **He placed his hand on my shoulder,** "How are you doing? Are you alright?" **The last few months, Peter has been my best friend. He has really been there for me. Jasper was so good to me and I love him don't get me wrong. I just love the friendship I have with Peter. It was effortless. **"I'm great. I haven't had a night tremor in a few weeks now. I know I was scaring Jazz, I have been trying to bury them."** I gave him a small smile.

"**You shouldn't be burying them. You know it will make them come back tenfold.. I think he needs to see them, I think you need to show him and tell him. That might make the tremors go away you know?"** He sat down, motioning for me to sit with him.

"**I can't.. they are too disgusting. I can't show him them, he'll be repulsed by them."** Peter rubbed my arm.

"**He won't be. If I know my brother, which I do. I know how much he loves you, do you really think something that happened to you, beyond your control would send him running for the hills, far away from you?"** I nodded. **"Come on sweetie, he wouldn't. I strongly believe he would fight death to stay with you. He would give up everything just to keep you in his life. He isn't going to walk away that easily. He isn't going away until you tell him to. I think you know that." **he lifted my face **"hmm? Now lets go downstairs before he thinks I'm having my way with you" **he laughed.

I really loved how between Peter and Jasper, their laughs were so genuine and carefree, very happy like. It always made me happy.

We went downstairs and I froze.

***JPOV

I heard my brother and my girl coming down the stairs.

"**Okay Roz, please be nice okay? She's really important to me" **Pleading with her.

"**Hey, anyone that can break down your impossible walls to get to the happiness and love within you back out to the rest of us she's good in my book.. Don't worry, I'll be nice regardless. She gave me back my best friend."** I breathed deeply and looked to the entrance, where I saw a look of terror on my love's face.

"**Isabella Swan?"** Roz's Voice cracked. What? She's freaked out? This is weird. Peter looked at me asking for an explanation. I shrugged.

"**Rosalie Hale?"** Tears were streaming down Bella's face, oh no. Why was she crying? I wasn't even thinking and I crossed the kitchen to wrap my arms around her.


	17. So Much Love

I don't own twilight or the characters!

"**I, uh… oh my lord. Isabella.. I'm so sorry." **Roz looked at me with pleading eyes I nodded and unwrapped my arms and hers took my place.

The hug was short lived. There was fury in Bella's eyes. **"Your fucking related? You're here? Does that mean he's here?"** she spat with such anger.

"**Swan. Cool it. I found out the story about a year ago. Carlisle couldn't keep it from us anymore.. Emmett and I packed our shit and left. We live out near Jasper's dad's place. I didn't know where you went. I wanted to tell you how sorry I am" **She stepped forward to Bella.

**Alice is furious but you know her, she's too fucking loyal to the dirty prick. I'll have you know Emmett busted him up pretty good. I broke my wrist. Hence the brace I still have on. I saw him about 6 months ago and cracked him a good one" **she laughed waving the brace **"Since Carlisle lied to everyone including Esme… she's moved out leaving Carlisle, Alice and Edward to live together. She moved to Buffalo. She couldn't find you either. We've all been trying to get in contact with you since we found out. We couldn't believe it"**

She lived with Edward? What? She knew my love back then?

Bella Finally spoke. **"I can't believe I caused you all so much pain, I'm so sorry Rosalie." **

"**No, if anyone is apologizing its me. I should've taken your side. I know what its like to be taken advantage like that. I'm so sorry. I'm so happy you found my brother. He's needed someone like you. I hope me and you can repair our relationship." **Now Roz was crying… wow…

"**Of course Rosalie. I just can't believe your related to the love of my life."** My heart was swelling up. Peter slapped me on the back.

Peter and I excused ourselves to set up for lunch and let the girls talk.

We ate lunch in silence. Minus some small talk and giggles. Bella and I did the dishes while Roz and Peter tackled the xbox. Emmett came running through the door. **"Jasper, where's my food you bastard?"** Bella gasped and dropped the cup she was washing into the sink and dried her hands. **"Are my eyes deceiving me? Is this the little baby swan?"** He was blinking and smacking his head… Roz walked in. **"Food is in the fridge pig. She isn't a little Swan anymore. She's Jasper's Haven." **The girls shared a smile. **"No kidding huh? Well, don't I get a hug squirt?" **

Bella nodded and walked timidly to Emmett. He scoped her up off the ground and Swear I heard her bones grind together. **"Eh, Idiot. Let my girl go before you break her and then I'll be breaking you" **I set the dish towel down and Emmett smiled. He set my girl down safely. **"Never safe from the big, stupid bear. Thanks Em.. I missed you too"** she walked to the sink and began the dishes again.

I punched Emmett in the arm, he caught my arm and gave me a hug, whispering into my ear, **"I'm glad you found each other. Protect her, I know I didn't do a good job of it. I'm here now.. Just don't hurt her." **I tipped my hat to him and went into the fridge handing him his food. **"Thanks Whitlock. See you guys when your done, we have to drive up soon. Major called me wondering where his family is."** He laughed and walked out of the kitchen. Roz following him.

"**What was the whispering about?"** She heard that? Wow.

"**He was just telling me not to hurt you. Are you okay with them being here? I know this has to be a lot to take in."** I added another plate to my dried stack and she grabbed my hand.

"**I'm fine. I'm just glad they now know the truth and I'm glad that I have part of my family back. I'm so happy right now. I have my best friend, my big stupid bear of a brother.. My overprotective sister and the love of my life all in the same house. Stop worrying I'm completely fine. If we don't hurry up and get out of here your father will kill himself." **

She had a point. **"Alright.**"

We finished the rest of the dishes in silence. I'd kiss her neck or brush the hair out of her eyes. I loved our relationship. 50% of it was based on touches and looks. We didn't need to always talk about how we felt, we could just read each other and tell.

After everyone had cleared out, I made sure everything was off and none of the burners in the kitchen was on. I grabbed our bag and headed out the door, locking the door and headed to the car. Off to see Major. I really hope he's better then he was.

***BPOV

I haven't seen Japer's father in so long. I'm a little worried. For Jasper's sake. I knew his dad wasn't doing very well. Charlotte called me and informed me. We were going to tell the boys and Rosalie tonight after the visit. I really didn't want to be the barer of bad news.

We arrived at the ranch and I flung out of the car, racing to Charlotte.

"**Sweetheart, I've missed you like a ripe Georgia Peach. Mmm. You look well."** she broke our hug.

"**I am, so do you"** I smiled at her and let everyone else have their hellos. I loved how her and Peter greeted each other. It was almost exactly how Jasper and I greeted each other after we spend any time apart.

"**Mi Amor" **I smiled as she jumped into his arms, wrapping her legs around his waist. **"Hello Beautiful" **Peter squeezed her to him and kissed her softly.

Jasper wrapped his arm around me and smiled at them as well. **"****To Father" **Jasper walked into the house, everyone following, saying their hellos to Jasper's father and heading into the kitchen. I stayed back to watch Jasper and his father greet each other.

"**Hey Major, how's the front line feeling?"** he tipped his hat to his dad before taking it off and taking a knee in front of his Father.

I heard a small grumble. **"It's fine Son, won the battle, working on wining the war. Put that hat back on kid." **He shook his hand and slapped his back.

"**Ah, Hello Izzy. Come here dollface" **extending his hand.

He always had a beautiful way of referring to me. Sort of like how his son was. Geeze. These men.. They are too good.

I walked over to his father, Jasper stood, letting me in front of him and gave him a small kiss on the cheek before doing the same to his father, **"You look well, I hope you haven't driven Charlotte nuts by sneaking out, riding your horses and causing trouble."**

He laughed loudly at me. Jasper now behind me was sharing in the same joke. **"Now, you know that I cannot drive that poor little peach crazy. Peter has already done that. Now, how is it this crazy son of a gun hasn't sent you running for the hills? Not that I mind, I adore you dollface." **I blushed. He really knew how to make me feel loved.

"**Actually, I'm surprised I haven't sent your boy here to the loony bin myself. I'm a handful" **Jasper snickered. **"Oh, my little doll.. You just have made him sane. Now come on Sergeant. Help your old man up and lets go eat shall we?" **

I stepped back and let Jasper Take his father's hand helping him up, **"No, No Darlin' doll.. A lady is always first, regardless if the hard ass war vet just had heart surgery." **these freaking men sometimes, should just go first.


	18. Doll Face

_I don't own twilight or the characters!_

Dinner was crazy. Everyone was chatting away, sharing stories and yelling at each other from across the table. I just sat in awe. Charlotte and Rosalie were trying to subdue their men from going outside and play fighting. Apparently, it happens all the time and one of them gets hurt.

When everyone was done, they cleared the table and headed outside. I volunteered to clear the table. Jasper's father came in and started to help. I already had to shoo Jasper away, and that was hard enough.

"**Izzy, I know you don't want any help, but I do live here." **damn, he got me.

"**That's fine sir. Your welcome to do whatever it is you'd like. Within health reasons. If you do feel weak or anything, I will kick you out and get the girls in here" **His laughter boomed through the dinning room.

"**That's fine good woman. Please, call me Dad or Father. I'd say call me Peter Or Whitlock but.. Peter's my son and Whitlock is what They call Jasper all the time. Sir, Major, Mister… doesn't work with me for ladies." **He set the dishes into the sink and smiled at me. **"So, when are the two of you going to grow up and get married?"** Whoa, is this his blessing?

"**Um.. I…uh.. Don't know.. We don't ever have a moment to slow down." **I started drying dishes.

"**I'm sorry, I don't mean to make you uncomfortable honey. I just see how you two are with each other and I'm always wondering when I'll be going to your wedding, seeing my son finally be joined forever to his better half."** I nodded

"**You know, you bring out the best in him. You are very attuned to each other. If he moves a fraction of an inch, you move as well. Its interesting to watch, I don't think either of you realize it. Its almost like your constantly dancing with each other." **He laughed softly.

"**It's actually how My Jacqueline and I were. She was the better part of me. I know it doesn't seem like it, but I used to be a real hard ass. Bad temper and all. I'd fly off the handle. I've never hit a woman.. Just would snap. Jasper is most like me, his temper is worse then mine but he's also got my Jacqueline deep down in him too. The way he forgives, the way he just loves wholeheartedly, how affectionate he is with myself, Peter, the girls. I was always affectionate with their mother. My Jacqueline, I just couldn't be to anyone else. I'm glad you brought that back out of him. Your such a sweet, loving girl."**

I set my hand on his back. **"You know, you have good parts to you as well. Your funny, your very insightful. You are affectionate with your sons and their lovers. As well as Rosalie. You just don't see it like I do. I wish I was able to meet your true love, Jasper talks about her a lot and I know she was a good woman. Trust me, when Jasper and I get married, you will be there. Maybe you'll walk me down the aisle?" **

He nodded, unplugging the sink. **"Of course. It would be an honour to do that dollface."** He turned to face me. **"Would you walk me to my chair please?" **he extended his hand.

"**Of course dad" **I smiled at him and we walked into the living room.

*A/N: I'm finishing up the next 2 or 3 chapters. I'll post them as soon as they are done. I KNOW a LOT of people will HATE the next chapter but, it'll make Bella Stronger and make Jasper/Bella's relationship stronger. It will seem weird, messed up and god knows what else but its going to be one of the things that I find Bella will need in this story.*


	19. Red Eyed Demon

I don't own twilight or its characters! 

He sat in his chair. **"Go gather everyone for me, please"** I nodded and walked out of the room and headed outside.

Everyone but Jasper were sitting at the picnic table. **"Hey guys, the major wants us inside."** They all nodded in some form and began to head into the house.

I noticed Jasper sitting on the wooden fence to the horse pen. **"Hiya stranger, how come your all the way over here?" **I cuddled between his open legs.

"**Hiya back princess."** he pushed me back and jumped down, taking me into his arms. **"It just looked so nice out. I thought I could get some thinking done, now lets go inside to the major."** grabbing my hand he led the way inside.

"**Now that everyone is here, I have some news to share." **Looking around the room, everyone was sitting on the couch. Jasper and I took up the loveseat in the corner.

"**This isn't easy. The doctors have told me the cancer is spreading and that they have done all they can for my heart. If the old ticker gives out, then it gives out. I know this isn't something ya'll want to hear but it's the truth."**

The room went quiet, Jasper was breathing was rapid and deep. He lifted me off his lap, set me on the loveseat and stalked out of the room. A few seconds later a door slammed shut and flew open, slamming again.

Everyone was frozen to their seats. I had to go after him, this was bad. I hope he's okay.

I took off outside, he was sitting on the steps, soon as I opened the wooden screen door, he got up and began walking further away from me, **"Jasper, stop please."** He stopped in front of me and I ran into the back of him, effectively falling over.

He picked me up off the ground walking me to the porch and that's when I saw his face. He looked so enraged. His eyes looked like his body was on fire. I grabbed his neck trying to hug him, he shoved me into the house, his hands felt like vice grips on my shoulders.

"**Don't…fucking touch me."** He screamed at me, grabbing a beer bottle and throwing it near me, making it smash into a million pieces and I felt pieces flying at me. He looked at me one last time and took off down the property.

The force of the shove had me gasping for air, I fell forwards onto my knees, sobbing uncontrollably.

Emmett came out with Peter and scooped me into his arms. **"Its okay Tinkybell. Its okay, I've got you… Peter chase down that fucker before I find him"**

***JPOV

What was I doing?

Walk away from her before you hurt her severely. Remove your hands and walk away, don't let the devil win!

I let her go, taking off down the property while I still had a handle on the red-eyed devil.

"**Whitlock, you're an idiot"** Great, Peter. I turned around to face him, **"I don't know wha--" **

His fist connected with my jaw. **"You fucking idiot, what is your problem?" **He hit me again. I swung back at him, feeling my wrist crack in the process. **"I just lost it Peter.. Just go away, please leave me alone." **I turned away from him and he spun me back around. **"No, you don't get to be left alone. You are about to lose your girlfriend over your temper. You aren't going near her alone anymore. Forget it. I wouldn't be surprised if she asked me to drive her home tonight. You stay away Jasper."** Wrong move Pete.

"**You have no right to tell me to stay away from her. Stay out of this Peter." **I knew he was right, I just hate being treated like a child when I'm angry. **"Fuck this, I have to go see if she's alright."** I started towards the house.

"**Jasper, don't go near her. She's pretty upset. Emmett and Roz are with her. They won't let you near her. Major is going to chew you out. Your staying on the main floor tonight."** He grabbed my shoulder and dragged me towards the house.

I was forced to my knees in front of my father who was standing at the door. **"I ought' a belt your ass right now. What are you doing mistreating a woman. Didn't your mama and I raise you better?" **He raised his hand, Peter was behind me, holding me back, knowing that red-eyed demon was going to explode the moment he struck me, like he did in the past.

This time he didn't strike me with his hand, he gave me a swift kick to the ribs. **"I should take my pistol out and shoot you.. What were you thinking Son?"** He shook his head.

"**I… I wasn't… I don't know what happened. That red-eyed demon just surfaced out of nowhere. She's always kept him at bay, I don't know how he came out at her. I swear I never meant anything by it." **Peter Picked me up, my shoulders throbbing from the force of his strength subduing me.

"**You stay down here tonight. The boys are going to be watching you. Now, outside." **I knew where this was going. I walked outside to the apple tree by the cars.

He came out with no help at all and began striking me with his belt. I was screaming bloody murder internally. I couldn't allow Bella to hear me yelling. It took all my strength to hold the demon at bay, I cannot kill my father over him punishing me for striking a woman.

"**Get in the house and stay put boy. You move anywhere near those steps and I'll strike you worse."**

I went back into the house where Emmett was ready to attack. I held my arms out and let him take his shot. He tackled me. **"I told you I'd hurt you" **I already felt worse then the belt, punches and kicking could ever hurt me, I hurt the woman I love in the worst way.

Emmett ended up using my whole body as a punching bag, **"Emmett. Stop son. Help your brother up. We're all angry, he's had enough." **He helped me up and I plopped down on the couch.

"**Emmett…. How is she? Is she okay? I didn't hurt her too bad did I? Please… tell me…" **I couldn't get her pained face out of my head. She looked like I was going to kill her.

"**She's pretty terrified. Started freaking out because I was carrying her upstairs. She looked okay, its hard to say, Rose and Charlotte took her into town to get her looked at, make sure you didn't break any ribs because her breathing was a bit shallow." **

My worst nightmare had come true. I broke my promise to her and physically hurt her. **"I turned into Edward. She'll hate me, fear me like she does him." **I put my head in my hands. **"I can't believe I did that. I've lost it. Why haven't you killed me, Em? I'm surprised the Major isn't dusting off his pistol to shoot me with at dawn."**

His laughter boomed through the house. **"He wouldn't shoot you, he may say he will but come the time to do it. He couldn't. You remind him of mom. Remember? Don't think of Edward. Edward was a dirty son of a bitch that controlled Tinks to no end. You aren't like him. Granted you do have a tempter but seriously.. that's the only bad part about you. Its good when we get into bar fights" **he slapped my back. **"but, you are not a bad person. Your human we all make mistakes. I'm pissed that you did that to her, I didn't think you ever would. Just stay away for a while.. Okay? it's a man's sleepover down here tonight."**

"**No, don't sleep down here with me. I swear, I won't go upstairs." **

"**I don't think so. We're both sleeping down here." **With that we heard car doors shut outside.

_*I know some of you are going to be angry at how this story is going right now but trust me, it'll get better and make J+B Stronger!* PLEASEEE DON'T HATE ME! lol_


	20. Realization

_**I do not own twilight or the characters. **_

_***It will turn around for Bella + Jasper, just wait.. I hope you don't hate me too much!***_

"**Peter Amour" **freaking Charlotte. Peter ran outside. **"No… No.. don't… " **it sounded like a frightened child.

"**Bellsy, its just me.. I'm taking you upstairs." **I heard whimpering. Emmett was holding me back, I just wanted to run to her, to sooth her and tell her how bloody sorry I was. Roz walked in first, and shut the doors linking the lobby with the living room. **"You are dead meat Whitlock" **I nodded.

"**Shoot me tomorrow okay Roz? How is she?" **I reached to her, I just needed someone to tell me right away.

"**She's got 3 cracked ribs, a concussion and she's shaken up.. She should be okay mentally in the morning, I hope." **

She slapped me. **"You're an idiot. You do realize the whole time she wasn't caring about herself. She was worried about you, nearly giving herself a heart attack, thinking that Peter and Emmett were killing you.. And that she would come back to you being buried in the backyard next to ol' yeller." **Only she would worry about others than herself.

"**I know your sorry, and you regret it. I can see it in your eyes. You just need to let her be tonight. Even Peter, who she's close with can't even be a foot from her and she'll break down. She's really freaked. She's in good hands. Don't worry, just stay down here." **She walked out of the room and headed up the stairs.

I spent the whole night listening to her scream. She was really terrified. It was like the dreams she had of Edward always haunting her. Instead, this time, it was me.

***PPOV

I've never seen him like that. I wanted to rip him into pieces. There's nothing I wouldn't do to protect this girl and apparently Dad felt the same way.

She ended up screaming the whole night. I did everything I could to console her. I ended up giving her some of my valium to calm her down. The door was kept locked just in case Jasper broke away from Emmett. It was unlikely but we weren't going to chance it. Charlotte spent the night in my Dad's room. He was having chest pains. Which wasn't a good sign. Thank god mi amour is a nurse.

Morning came pretty quickly. She woke up and jumped out of bed.. Making herself woozy. **"Whoaa bellsy."** I caught her before she fell completely over.

"**Oh Peter." **she flung herself at me. **"Ouch…. Oh Peter. Did you stay the whole night?" **she clung to me like I was her lifeline.

"**Yeah I did. You needed your friend, your brother. I wasn't going to leave you here all alone. Come on now babe." **I kissed the top of her head.

"**Now, I'm going to grab one of the girls to come in and help you clean up. Jay will have my head if I was to do it. So would Charlotte.." **I winked at her and headed out to find one of the girls.

I bumped into Rose. **"Hey Rosie, she's awake. I don't want to tear Char from dad, so can you help her clean up?" **She smiled at me.

Time to face Jasper. I just hope he didn't hear her too much last night.

***BPOV

I was still replaying the events of last night in my head. I knew it wasn't Jasper's fault. It was partly mine. I should've let him be. I should've asked him before running after him if he would like some company. I knew better.

"**Swan, you alright? We're going to get you cleaned up okay? You have to take it easy on your ribs.**" Rosalie knocked and walked In.

"**uh… okay.." **this was going to be uncomfortable.

She walked past me and into the bathroom and started the bathtub. **"Okay Swan. Strip down and get in here." **I decided everyone was going to see them anyways.. I hopped into the tub with Rosalie's assistance.

She gasped. **"Is that what he did to you?"** I nodded, unable to fight the tears.

"**Oh honey, I can't believe this. And you didn't let him stop you from living… honey.. Its okay. I just didn't know this is what he did. Its fine, it doesn't scare me. Its okay sweetie."** patting my back and running her fingers through my hair.

"**I know. Its just.. No one has ever seen them. Peter's seen a few but.. He's become the last knot in my rope, so to speak."** I began to relax. I had to my ribcage was throbbing in pain.

"**Well, you can count me as a second knot. Now, lets get you all cleaned up. The major has been worried about you like the rest of us." **

"**Is Jazz okay?"** I had to know. **"Well, he's not dead. I'm sure he wishes it. Emmett spent the night downstairs with him." **she gave me a tiny smile and with that we washed my body quietly.

"**I assume you wanted comfort today. So sweat pants and a loose fitting top.. Just to keep your ribs from getting worse." **I smiled at her. She still remembered my obsession with sweatpants. They were so comfy.

I looked out the window it was so bright and beautiful outside. **"Hey Rosalie, I'm going to head outside, if Jasper's around can you send him to me?" **

She gave me a light hug. **"Of course. Enjoy the day Izz."** she opened the door for me and I took off down the stairs, I didn't stop running until I was 90 feet from the house.

Of course, I had to be an idiot and run. It hurt to breathe. Damn it. I used the wooden fence to lean over, trying to catch my breath. It really hurt. I started panicking because of the pain, oh no.. its just making it worse.

I started thinking of Jasper, laying in his arms just laying in silence. Our breathing completely in sync with each other.

"**Hey…. Darlin'… you alright?" **I turned around and I what I saw was the worst thing in the world.


	21. Face To Face

_**I do not own twilight or the characters. **_

It sounded like my Jasper. It didn't look like him at all. The hair was much too messy and pulled back into a ponytail.. Not hanging in front of those gorgeous eyes.

The ice blue eyes were empty. No emotions, nothing.. There were bags underneath the eyes, they were red and purple in color. One was turning black. His lips were a little swollen and his jaw had a tiny cut on one side and a bruise on the other. He wasn't wearing a shirt.. I looked down. He was marked with bruises and red marks. From his left eye to his hips. His arms had red marks on them as well.

"**Honey.. ?"** I snapped out of my Japer-oogling daze. I focused on his eyes. Trying to read his emotions but again… nothing.

"**Yes Jasper?"** I was trying to be strong. My body was just in complete panic mode, my ribs were killing me.. But I wanted to have my time with Jasper. I knew he didn't mean to do it.

"**Are you…."** He looked down, shoving his hands into his jean pockets. Looking back up at me, his eyes watering. **"Are you… okay? I didn't realize what I was doing… I didn't know… I'm So sorry… I broke my promise.. I became Ed--"**

I pushed his shoulder. **"Hey! You are not him. Never compare yourself to that son of a bitch. Don't you fucking ever think that" **

"**You think because I was stupid not to ask you if you needed a shoulder to cry on… that it gives you the right to compare yourself to the world's lowest of lowly scum? I don't think so Jasper Whitlock"** I was fuming. Body hurting me or not, I was going to let him have it.

"**I'm so sorry. I just… I cant believe this.. I…. I know your sore… can.." **He moved a little closer to me and I flinched a little. **"I'm sorry… Can I.. be this close to you, touch you? Just tell me if its too much." **

He extended his arm.. I didn't want him to continue to beat himself up. Far as I was concerned it was all my fault. I was warned of his temper many times. I should've lft him alone, should've read him better.

I stopped the voices in my head going back and forth and grabbed his arm pulling him to me. **"As long as you don't hug me too tightly or touch the rear of my rib cage, we're fine" **I kissed his chest. **"I'm so sorry to have made you fly off the handle like that Jazz. I should've known better and left you alone." **

He kissed the top of my head. **"No Darlin' I should've told you from the beginning not to come after me… you were just being the loving girlfriend. I just don't know what happened. I think… it'd be a good idea if, I stayed here a while with my dad….You can stay at my place or Peter's if you like. I need to.. Figure this out." **

I wasn't separating myself from him again. **"No, we'll figure it out together. I love you and you love me. Isn't that what people are suppose to do? Help their loved ones through stuff, figure it out together? We're better together than we ever could be apart Jazz."**

He Sighed. **"Your right. We are better together. Are you feeling any pain right now darlin' ? I don't want to put you through anymore." **he took a deep breath and let me go.

"**Hey, I wasn't finished hugging you Mister Whitlock. For your information, I feel no pain when I'm with you. So Relax… I have already forgotten last night. I Love you Mr. Whitlock." **I pulled his neck down to me and kissed his favourite spot.

"**I love you too li' lady. More then you'll ever know"** He took my hand and walked me over to a shady spot, under a big oak tree. I looked at him and in his eyes, the sparkle was coming back.

"**You look more alive now"** I laid on top of him, not wanting to put pressure on my back

"**That's because my reason to stay alive told me she's alright and to stop fretting."** That sexy crooked grin came across his face. I couldn't resist.

I kissed him furiously. After a short while, I felt the bulge in his jeans growing. **"Darlin'.. can we pick this up when we get home?"** he lifted himself on his elbows, in turn, giving himself more room to distance us.

"**What if I want to have some fun right now cowboy? This won't come later."** He was giving into me. **"On second thought, maybe.. We should wait a few weeks, when I'm better"** I was laughing internally.

He Groaned.** "It's been 8 months and when you finally want to have your way with me, you want to wait even longer?" **

I giggled. **"Well, I want to be in tip top shape, besides.. You don't want to be pleasured without pleasuring me now do you?" **

He growled. God that was sexy. **"No, this time, you are going to cum profusely around me first.. And you aren't going to handle being teased. Believe me Li' lady, your in for some serious pleasure." **He winked at me.

_****More will come tomorrow night. ENJOY!****_


	22. Doe Eyes

I don't own twilight or these characters.

He began putting soft kisses on my neck. His lips felt so tender and soft. Putting his hands on my shoulders, he began slowly working his hands into the knots in my shoulders. It felt so good. I was losing the ability to fight him off. I didn't want to do this here, at his father's house and with my ribs hurting.

"**Jazz… as good as that feels.."** his hands found a sore spot and were instantly making the pain disappear… **"ah.. that's the spot" **I whispered.

I could feel him laughing slightly **"but?.." **

"**I don't want do this until I'm better. What's another month?"** I had to move away from him I began lifting myself off of him and his growing bulge which was teasing my centre with every passing second. He stopped me.

"**I don't think so Darlin' you are staying put. I promise, I won't send you over the edge.. I'll just frustrate you a little. It'll feel so good.. I promise. We won't be that intimate until you are fully healed. You've pleased me so many times before, please just be submissive this one time."** He started lightly sucking on my neck and collar bone..

One hand holding my body to his, the other hand making its way under my sweatpants and just teasing my clit with his fingers on top of my underwear. I started sucking on his neck to contain my moaning. He started stroking me faster.. I began biting his neck lightly, his bulge was starting to grow again and a silent growl was humming through his chest.

I bucked my hips into his hand making the pressure even harder on me. I moaned into his ear. He stopped and pulled his hand out. **"Darlin'… please.. We're going home tonight, don't push me.." **I grinded my hips into his growing bulge.. **"you won't feel that good if you really push me too far. I don't want to make love to you where it will hurt you… please honey." **

I kissed his neck. I decided to really test him and I whispered into his ear. **"Fine. But it'd be much sexier to just do it here in a shower or your old bedroom. I don't care if you fuck me real hard or make slow…. Passionate.. Love to me… I just want you inside me because you feel so goood.." **Okay, that was stupid but I wanted to drag the last bit out.. It really has been too long since we last had sex let alone make love.. I just wanted him so bad. I missed that aspect to our relationship. Maybe it was just time to suck it up and let him see my scars. Regardless of how ugly they are.

"**Darlin' if you could only feel my daily desire for you when you aren't purposely turning me on.. Mmm.. Its like sweet potato pie for me all the time.." **he looked up and down my body… putting his hand on my ass and squeezing it.

"**Why do you have to be so beautiful and perfect. I just about lose my mind when your near me. Without the touching, kissing or teasing.. Honey.. If you can hold out until we get home, I'll hammer into you so hard.. You wont feel a thing." **He smirked and winked. Then picked us up off the grass**.**

"**Come on, lets go inside." **He brushed himself off and took my hand.

When we got into the house, The major was giving Jasper the evil eye and looked to me with a soft smile.

"**Hey Dad… Lunch and Char has made some sweet potato pie, Bells.. Jay come on.. Let's eat!"** Peter sprang to my side and took my hand. **"Jay, see to Dad wont you?"** he winked at me and guided me to the table.

I sat between Peter and Emmett. Their respected others near them and Jasper situated across from me.

Lunch went by quickly. No one talked unless it was to pass something to someone else.

The day went by in a blur, next thing I knew we were packing our things.

***JPOV

I really didn't want to leave my father's place. I knew he didn't want to leave us either. I was just really anxious to put this terrible weekend behind us. Soon as we get home, I'm getting on my medication again. There's NO way, I'm ever doing that to Bella and losing control ever again.

As my beautiful woman was packing our things, I couldn't help but stare at her.. She was so amazing. The way she would get caught up in her thoughts. Her big brown doe eyes would daze off. As she's making her mental checklist- her forehead creases upwards and her nose scrunches up. How those sweatpants just fit her loosely and how well she moves in them. I can see her curves through those clothes. She just makes it work.

Mmm. I love the small of her back. Its so tight and fit. I cant take this.

I kiss her back roughly. **"Leave the stuff here.. Let's go now babe.." **I spun her around and her big doe eyes were staring at me in shock.

I took a step back, not wanting to scare her any further.


	23. Control

***I don't own twilight or these characters***

**I misread what her eyes were saying. Instead of her backing away from me at the same time as I did. She took a step forward wrapping her arms around my neck.**

"**What if we just do it here and be really quiet, the doors locked so why not?"** she began her assault on my neck. God damn. I can't believe this girl.

I lifted her up and her legs wrapped around my waist, I held her up by her ass and walked over to the bed, laying her down lightly.. Where I started my own assault on her neck she was making quick work of my jeans.

I began trailing my mouth all over her body. I moved from her neck to her collarbone and then down to her glorious breasts. I began sucking on each of them slowly.. And that's when I saw them.

She realized I did and I felt her cringe a little. That fucking bastard. Why would he do this?

They were all different, some were weird stars and some were crazy lines.

I decided to let her know I knew it wasn't her fault and I still thought she was fucking sexy and always turned me on.

I began taking the very tip of my tongue and lightly tracing the scars. She began moaning and withering underneath me. **"Shhh darlin'"** I breathed into her stomach.

I kept tracing all the scars down to her centre.. I made sure to make quick work of this because she'll go crazy and attack me, not letting me have my own teasing moments.

I slowly licked her folds, **"Ja… ughh"** now my dick was screaming. He wanted in her, but I couldn't do that. I stuck my tongue into her and began pulling in and out. Bella gripped the sheets and was starting to clinch onto my tongue and rocking her body into my face. I used my one hand to hold her from breaking my nose and the other hand was stroking her clit, rubbing small, quick circles around it. She just lost it.. **"Jazz…. Jazzzzz"** I licked up all of her juices and then decided, now I could get my own pleasure.

"**Yes darlin'?"** I slid inside her and instantly growled. She felt so good. She was still so tight, it was like she was a perfect fit for me. She bucked her hips into me and I had to flip her on top. I held her body in place and she began kissing my body.. All the while still pumping hard on to my dick. God she was amazing.

** 2 Weeks Later- (Still JPOV) still**

I got up really early. I carefully climbed out of bed, trying to make sure I didn't wake the sleeping beauty beside me. After about 5 minutes of trying not to wake her up, I went down stairs and used the shower there. Again, trying not to wake my darlin' up. What can I say? Its 6 am and we didn't get to bed until about 3 hours ago. She was just as intoxicated with me as I was with her. I couldn't get enough.

Here we go again, my dick was coming to life. I tried to will him away. I thought of Jessica's annoying voice. Ahh.. That worked.

I made quick work of my shower, got out and brushed my teeth then dried myself off and went upstairs to get dressed.

I threw on some jeans, and a black t-shirt. I looked at my watch, it was now 7 and my appointment was in 15 minutes. Damn.

I walked over to where sleeping beauty lay and knelt down. Her brown hair was flung in all directions, her lips were still a little swollen, her cheeks were a lovely pink color. She looked so peaceful. I hated doing this but she'll be pissed if I don't at least say good morning and goodbye.

I stroked her cheek and whispered into her ear. **"Darlin' I'm going to be gone for a few hours. I know I promised I'd be here all day but Peter needs me, I have my cell on me so call if you need me. I Love you" **I kissed her softly on the lips and her arms flung around my neck. I pulled back.

"**Mmmm.. Love you cowboy" **she breathed. Jeez. My dick was beginning to twitch. Fuck, that's embarrassing, Oh hey doc, just ignore my hard on and I'm not hard because of you no worries.

I walked out of the room before It could get any worse.

I left some money on the counter, hoping this time she'd actually use it.

I flew in my truck to Dr. Masen's office. I made it with 2 minutes to spare and apparently she was just popping her head out to call my name.

"**Mr. Whitlock, right on time, come on in."** she greeted me with a smile.

She was a tall, slender woman, a heart shaped face, with caramel brown hair. She was gorgeous. Not too many women in their late 30's or early 40's could manage to look like she was still in her early 20's in college or something. She was one of the lucky ones.

It was also pretty cool that she didn't get crabby woman syndrome. I've had to deal with nurses even older than her, all crabby as shit. Of course, I'd charm them and they would be nice to me.. But still.. It was still nice knowing I didn't have to charm my way into the depths of her cold heart to find the warmth.

"**Thanks for seeing me on a Saturday"** I took off my hat and followed her in.

I walked in and sat down on the hospital bed. Well, the "aversion" of one.

"**So doc Masen, what's the verdict?" **I smiled at her, trying to hid my anxiety.

"**Anxious huh? Well, the tests came back just like I thought they would. You were right, the anger, anxiety and depression have come back. Your blood has come back negative of any other substance, its just procedure you know." **She was looking at my chart, noting everything we did 2 weeks ago.

"**I think I will put you on some Tranylcypromine, it will work more effectively and I do believe the medication you took in the past was starting not to work with you a year ago. You are to take this twice daily, 30 milligrams a day. That's It. This isn't something to be fooling around with." **I nodded.

"**There are some serious side effects, if there is any unusual excitement or nervousness, trouble sleeping, fast and irregular pulse, confusion, anxiety, or seizures.. You are to call me and go to the emergency room immediately…"**

She closed my file and handed me my prescription.

"**Take them within 12 hours of each other and read the information the pharmacist give you. I know no one reads it but I really do encourage you to read it. It's very important."**

I nodded. **"I will Doc. Thank you"** I shook her hand.

"**Oh, Mr. Whitlock.. Be sure to book an appointment with Alice my secretary for next week, I wish to see you on a weekly and/or bi-weekly basis if possible for the next few months. I know your schedule is tough. If we have to meet on Saturdays then its fine." **She gave me a warm smile and opened the door. I motioned for her to go first and held the door open.

The doc blushed a little **"Thank you, have a good day."**

I put my hat back on, **"You too doc."** with that I headed back out into the waiting area to Alice.

"**Good morning Alice, I wish to make an appointment for next week. Anytime in the morning before 8 am would be best."** I tipped my hat and smiled.

This girl who looked to be about 22, with short brown hair and green eyes looked up at me. She was pretty. Not my type but pretty.

"**Sure Mr. Whitlock, is next Thursday at 7:30 am alright?"** She smiled at me leaning a little too close to me. Poor girl still had the hots for me.

"**That'll be fine Alice. Thank you, see you next week."** I smirked at her, so I wanted to tease her- there isn't a crime in that. I knew where my heart and dick lied and that was to the woman at home in my bed. I turned on my heel and headed out the door.

Fuck, when did it get cold? I zipped up my coat and ran to my truck, pulling out of the parking lot and ade it to the pharmacy when it opened. I ran in and dropped off my perscription and headed back to my truck. Effectively missing all the puddles around me, I pulled out of the parking lot and hit a red light. In that instant, my cell rang.


	24. Flashback

_*I don't own twilight or these characters*_

"**Good morning sleeping beauty." **I was still hoping she'd still be asleep when I got home.

"**Have you gone to see Peter yet?"** her voice cracked.

"**Whats wrong honey? No I haven't, I'm heading there in the next 5 mintues though"** this was now making me a little worried.

"**I just woke up, can you come get me and then we can go to Peter's together?" **she yawned into the phone.

"**Alright darlin' I'll be home in a mintue."**

"**In that case, I'll wait to have my shower. I Love you, drive safe."**

Damn. **"Alright, you get in there and I'll join you, how about that?"** My dick was already willing and able to do this.

"**Mmm. Okay"** and now he's twitching.

"**Love you too honey."**

I hung up and sped home.

I parked the truck and walked in the front door, locking it behind me and taking the stairs three at a time. I heard the shower running from our room. I closed our door and locked it, I tore off my shirt, jeans and socks. I walked into the bathroom… Mmmm Strawberries. I locked the bathroom door.

Can never be too careful since Peter loves to cock block me.

I opened the shower door and stepped inside.

"**Why, Hello my cowboy."** she turned facing me.

"**Hello princess."** I smirked at her and started rinsing the shampoo out of her hair.

"**Mmm.. Can you wash my hair for as long as I live?" **She moaned.. Running her hands up and down my chest.

"**There's nothing else I'd rather do then wash your beautiful hair"** Well, maybe there were a few, but it all involved her so.. That counts right?

"**Mm… right.. Theres something else I want to do instead"** She got down on her knees and took my dick into her mouth before I had time to register what the hell was going on. I thought I was going to lose my balance and fall.

"**Shhhhhh… shhhhhhittt! Warn me next time darlin" **she was going pretty quick too.. It felt so good.

Before I knew it she jumped up on my dick, wrapping her legs around my waist and pushing me back against the wall. If there was a way I could get any harder, I swear she made it happen just then.

***BPOV

I don't know what came over me. I just felt his fingers in my hair and lost it. Whenever he touches me I take it too far.

Now I'm making his eyes roll back into his head and I'm screwing the hell out of him. Spontaneous sex is the greatest.

I felt his shoulders tensing.. He was close, it was a good thing 'cause I was too..

He growled and his warm seed spilled over into me.. I wasn't ready to let go. To my surprise, he kept my pace and turned me around so my back was facing the shower wall.

"**Come on darlin'.. you know you want to clench down around my dick.. Come on just cum for me darlin" **stupid cowboy cooing into my ear. Another minute rolled by and I gave up, giving into him. **"Mmm. Now, doesn't that feel better?"** turning off the water and grabbing a towel for me.

"**No, because its now over." **I frowned.

"**Hey, no frowning on my watch babe."** He lifted my chin with just a finger and gave me a sweet wet kiss. **"Now, let's get dressed and head over to my brother's shall we?"** he opened up the door and let me walk through.

Again, stupid southern men! Ah!

He grabbed some clothes and walked out of the room, giving me privacy.

I pulled out a gray t-shirt and dark wash jeans. I headed downstairs where I found my cowboy pulling a black jacket and zipping it up. He looked at me and laughed.

"**What's so funny?"** Did I have something in my hair? On my face?

"**We're wearing the same thing darlin"** He unzipped his coat and opened one side.

"**That is funny"** I laughed at him. He slid my coat on for me and opened my door. Off we were to Peter's house.

***JPOV

"**I got some new ones today. I'm going to pick them up, cover for me will you?"** I knew it was wrong to hide things, especially from people I love but I didn't want her to feel bad, to feel like she's the reason I'm being medicated again. With or without her, I'd be getting back onto this shit. But, I know how her mind works.

"**Why don't you grab some pizza while your out. Actually I'll go with you, how's that bro?" **He slapped my back **"Go to the car**" He threw me his keys and I lifted an eye brow at him **"Shut up, I got our jackets and the girls. Go. Now" **I saluted him and headed to the car… treating me like a damn kid screw him.

He came bolting out of the house and into the car.

We drove off into town.

"**So, what are these new ones?"** Always the worried big brother.

"**They-- uhh.. Called Tranylcypromine, they are apparently stronger than the other stuff I was taking years ago….I really have to watch my dosage and stuff with them but it should be fine. Twice a day instead of 3 or 4. Remember how crazy that was?"** we laughed.

_*Flash back*_

"_**Hey Jay, you take the yellow one yet?"**__ this was getting annoying. _

"_**Yes"**__ like I'd miss the dose._

"_**How about the green one?"**_

"_**Yes.. Stop."**__ he was getting on my nerves._

"_**I think you need the white one. You look like you are going to explode, Major sees you like that and you'll get a whooping."**__ he started smacking his hands together._

"_**I already did you fucking annoying prick"**__ I felt like hitting him._

"_**Sweet pea, now don't use such language!"**__ mama scolded me. __**"Peter, don't you have work?" **__Damn it. He's always getting me in shit._

"_**Yeah, I'm going. See you Ma." **__with a kiss he ran out the door._

"_**I'm sorry mama, I'm letting my temper get the best of me. I can't help it when Pete's being such a Fu--"**_

"_**JASPER HALE!"**__ waving a finger at me_

"_**Flugging donkey head… what else did you think I was going to say"**__ I smirked. _

"_**Oh sweet pea.. You are such a troublesome child. Your lucky I love you much too much to do anything about it."**__ She smiled at me and sighed__** "Now run along my handsome young man. Mama's got things to do."**__ Tapping her cheek with her finger._

_I kissed her cheek and then her forehead. I had become so much taller than her. She's 5'9" but I'm nearly 6'5".. _

"_**Alright Mama. Shout if you need me. Even if you feel dizzy or we.."**__ she put a finger over my mouth. __**"Hush Darlin' I'm fine. Now go tend to your books and stop getting as ill as a hornet." **__She pulled me into a hug and I picked her up off the ground. Breathing in her scent. Strawberries and Cinnamon. I felt my red-hot demon fade away. Its true. A mother's love is strong enough to beat anything. I will never doubt that._

"_**Okay mama. I Love you"**__ there wasn't a time I wasn't saying it to her. The only woman I'd ever say it to._

"_**I love you too baby. Now scat cowboy"**__ she began shooing me from the kitchen. I heard her magical laugh, how she always made me feel whole and loved. I can't ever picture my life without her and her love. God, did I ever love her._

_*PRESENT DAY*_

"**Yo, you okay Jay?"** Peter shaking me lightly.

"**Huh?…. Yeah, Yeah"** clearing my throat **"I'm good Pete."** Fuck. I hate when I think about her when he's around. Flugging donkey head!

"**Thinking about her huh?"** he squeezed my shoulder. **"I have been too. Scaring the air out of Charlotte lately. I keep having these dreams about her, like she's never left" **he coughed slightly..

"**She never fucking left Peter. Don't be a fucking asshole about it"** I tried to keep the demon at bay but he was fighting through the ranks of my carefully placed walls inside.. My hands tightened on the stirring wheel and my jaw was clenched shut.

Peter sensed this immediately and played with the radio **"So, Pepperoni or Cheese?" **

***BPOV

"**Honey, we are really going to have to be there for those men for the next little while."** She was shaking.

"**Charlotte. What's wrong? What are you talking about?"** Shifting her weight on my lap, it wasn't hard she was a tiny girl.

"**Why do you think dear Rosie isn't around? Its when their mother has passed. I can't remember the day. I found out later on that she had passed.. The boys nor does the major talk about it. I'm more worried about how this will affect Peter over his brother." "Won't Peter be like Jasper? Depressed and missing their mother?"**

"**No, Jasper has never taken it easily. Peter tries to bury his own pain and tries to pull him out of his despair every year. It takes him about 2 months before he actually even acknowledges anyone. Jasper is a very complicated person"**

"**I won't let him fall into that trap. Believe me." **There would be no way that it'd happen while I'm around.

"**I don't doubt you Bella. Trust me. I don't. Its just… Jasper and his mother were too close. He is exactly like her, minus the rage. I just really hope this time around, he doesn't fall into that trap. He will be very difficult to be around. If he falls into it. Promise me you'll leave and come here"**

"**He won't"** He wouldn't if I was with him every step of the way

**Bella, please! PROMISE ME"**

Why was she so hell bent? **"Okay, I promise Charlotte." **I just had to ask.

"**Charlotte. What happened to Jasper? To make him… get that angry? Blow up like that? I know he has some sc…"**

She cut me off before I finished. **"I can't go into that with you. You'll have to find out from him honey. I'm sorry. Its not my place to say. All I will say is some of it is passed down…. Some tea?"**

I had to drop this with her. She was uncomfortable and Jasper would get upset if I asked Charlotte instead of him.

"**Sure, sounds good"** I smiled following her into the kitchen.

We made some tea and even some salad. The boys finally came back, smiling and racing through the kitchen. Picking the two of us off the ground.. Which isn't hard, I'm only about 5'3" and Charlotte is about 5'6" but dating men that are 6'4" and 6'5", its not a problem.

"**Hey beautiful.." **he kissed my lips softly **"been too long since I've seen your face." **and then my forehead. **"Mm.. don't I know it cowboy."** I snuggled into his neck, he smelt so good. It just smelt like home.

I never noticed the dull ache that haunts my chest and heart when he's gone.. It only is replaced with more love when I'm near him.

"**Shall we eat darlin?" **He put me down and I nodded.

We all ate and shared stories about work or anything really with a joke. We always laughed. I loved coming here. Peter and Charlotte are the perfect pair, they balance each other well.. Sort of how Jasper and I are together.

We moved into the living room, playing on the Wii. Girls against boys. Before we knew it-it was 2 in the morning, I fell asleep on Japer's shoulder.

"**Hey Darlin? We're fixin to leave. I'll carry you alright?" **he whispered and I nodded. **"Pete, We're going to leave. Bella's tired and so am I. Same time in a week?"** I felt two pairs of lips kiss my cheeks. **"****Night Bells. Whitlock, drive safe. Love you both." **I heard some slapping which I knew to be the boys hugging. **"Love you guys too. Thanks for tonight"**

I felt something being draped on me and then I smelt his scent, stronger than ever. Ahh, his coat.. mm… I drifted off into a sleepy slumber.

***JPOV

I am so grateful for the family I do have. Today would've been even better if Roz and Emmett came out as well. I know she's upset, I have to be sure to see her sometime this week.

Hell, we're all upset, my mama's death is tomorrow. I'm surprised we even kept happy tonight. Mama would've wanted us to be happy and having fun not being upset and sulking. Problem is, how can you have fun when the sweet sunshine in your life is no longer in the sky? It's like you watched the sun set one night and it ever rose again.

I am so glad to have Bella in my life, she has become my sunshine, my constant reason for being happy and living my life in a good way. Making me be a better man and a better person. I can only hope one day, she'll be my wife.

That beauty is asleep. She's so gorgeous in her sleep. Looks so happy and so peaceful.

I struggled to stay awake driving home. This was bad. I parked the car and carried sleeping beauty to our room. I stripped her of her clothes, jeans are uncomfortable to sleep in and then stripped off my clothes and fell asleep holding my lifeline.

I woke up and felt horrible. I turned over and buried my head into the pillow beside me. Mmm. Strawberries. Then I felt a small soft hand brush along my back. **"wakey wakey cowboy" **I instantly smiled. And turned over to see her, sitting in front of me. She crawled up into my lap and chest, cuddling up to me as much as possible.

"**I don't want to be awake, lets stay in bed all day and cuddle." **She was breathing deeply, leaving kisses all over my chest. **"Is that a good idea cowboy?"** My dick twitched. **"Not really darlin' but I just want to lay here all day with you."**


	25. Empty

***I do not own twilight or these characters.***

**She lifted her head up and shook her head, making her brown hair fly everywhere. My hand caught some of her hair before it hit her in the face.**

**She hummed when my hand touched her head and brought her face closer to mine. **

"**MM.. got to go to work, so do you mister" **and with that she got off me and headed to the shower.

Work is always cock blocking me. Fuck this not today.

I walked into the shower and hopped in with her.

I lifted her by her ass, and she complied. Moaning slightly - wow, she's just as ready as I am. Wasting no time with foreplay I let my dick slide inside. We both moaned at the contact. I loved how perfect she fit around me, tight but not too tight to make it hurt.. Warm, wet.. And throbbing onto me. Sex is the best with her.

It didn't take long until we both released.

I set her down in the shower and washed her hair as she washed my body.

"**mm.. I love you"** She stood on her tippy toes and kissed me before getting out.

"**I love you too babe" **I followed her lead and got out to dry off.

Off to fucking work. I dropped Bella off so she wouldn't have to use the train.

"**I'll be over later darlin' have a good day." **I gave her a long kiss. **"I Love You"**

"**You better be"** she winked at me and got out of the car. **"Love you"**

I arrived to work again, missing Jessica on my way in. Thank god. I took the packet from my desk and took my first dosage of the day. Now, time to deal with this bullshit.

Opening a file I began filling out papers for another demo job, I looked over to the seat in front of me and that's when I saw her.

***BPOV

Work was so busy my feet hurt. I can't believe I just worked 10 hours with no break. Its now 8pm and Jasper should've been here an hour ago. That's strange. Its unlike him at all. He probably called me but me being the idiot, I left my cell phone at his place.

I really don't want to waste time standing anymore.

I'll just head to my apartment, its closer and I'll just call him from there.

I made my way to the train and thankfully, this time I was able to find a seat. After about 20 minutes and a bus ride later, I arrived back at my house.

Wow, its been a while since I've been here. Such a change from Jasper's place which was neat and organized. This, place… was not. It was EMPTY! At least it felt like it when Jasper wasn't around

I had clothes and shoes everywhere. I started cleaning and for some reason I didn't stop. I mopped the floors and scrubbed the bathroom clean.

I plopped down on my bed. **"Holyyy.. That was sooo much work"** I knew I felt exhausted, more exhausted than I have ever felt, but I needed to call Jasper.

I dialled his number and let it ring.

"**Yeah?"** A tired and gruff voice answered the phone

"**Hi cowboy, are you feeling okay?" **Oh god. Please don't tell me I woke you up!

"**Hi.. Yeah, I'm just so fucking tired" **Uh oh, He's pissed

"**Do you want me to come over, give you a massage and help you sleep?"** I figured it might be work and he can't sleep like he gets sometimes.

"**No.. its fine. You get sleep.. I'll be sure to see you at work tomorrow morning okay?" **Ouch. He wants me to stay away… ugh, the pain.

"**Okay. I Love You" **trying to prevent my voice from cracking

-Click-

What….. The…. Fuck? Something is definitely going on. I intend to find out.

*I know this chapter is a little short… I'll try to make the next one a little longer. Thanks for people reviewing and being interested in this fanfic.*


	26. Not Working

***I do not own twilight or these characters.***

**-I'll try and update more as my week gets less stressful! Enjoy!-**

****2 months later****

*****BPOV**

**I woke up and turned over, to my surprise he was still sleeping beside me. I looked at the clock it was 6:30 and Jasper had to start work at 7.**

**I shook him lightly and kissed his shoulders making a trail to his neck.**

"**Honey… its 6:30, you've got to get up for work"** I kissed his ear and ran my hand slowly up and down his back, breathing in that cinnamon scent of his.

"**Ah fuck really?"** he jumped out of bed without a kiss or even a hi to acknowledge me… he took off into the shower and I could hear him violently getting clean and cursing when the shampoo bottle kept hitting the floor.

He wasn't even 5 minutes and he popped out, soaking wet. Mmm.

I walked over to him and put my arms around his neck jumping up and wrapping my legs around him.

"**Well, Well.. Good morning to me." **I went to kiss his lips and he turned his head, making me kiss his jaw. His hands met mine and were prying them from his neck.

"**Bella, I've got to get to work.. I can't do this now. I'm sorry."** What? No Darlin? Princess? Babe?

I jumped down from him and laid down on the bed, my face in the pillow. I felt defeated for the millionth time this month.

"**Have a good day at work. I Love you Jazz"** I mumbled through the pillow.

"**Will do."** his footsteps retreating and the bedroom door shutting.. And then he was gone.

I got ready for work myself and made it with enough time to sit and have a coffee before I had to start serving people. My mind began to drift to the thoughts I've been trying to bury for weeks.

Something was up with Jasper. He was either at work all day and most nights, or sleeping. This wasn't like him. Whatever happened to visiting your girlfriend at work, a phone call to tell her your okay? Or even some dinner when you get home? Not even a fucking good morning kiss. Not even a good morning quickie which he loved so much. This was bad. For the past two months, almost not even a kiss..

I know exactly what was happening.

He was seeing someone else. He just hasn't decided to dump me yet for his new girlfriend. He cannot have his cake and eat it too. Fuck that.

There is no way he is getting away with this.

I will NOT let a man walk all over me. Fuck that.

I walked out of Harry's I was finished my shift there anyways and headed to Jasper's Office.

I took the elevator up to his floor and was greeted by a drop-dead gorgeous, busty brunette.

"**Good afternoon. How may I help you?"**

"**I'm here to see Mr. Whitlock"**

"**If you had an appointment with Mr. Whitlock, I'm afraid it has been moved to next week. He isn't seeing anyone at this time." **

Trying to be a bitch much? **"No, I don't have one. I would just like to see him, I'm sure if you tell him Bella is here he will see me."**

"**I'm sorry, I'm afraid doesn't want to be bothered. You are just going to have to make an appointment." **

Yeah fuck you bitch. I slammed my hand down on her desk

"**Well, I'm afraid you're going to have to disturb them" **I felt like jumping over it and beating her.

"**Bella?"** I turned around and saw a smirking blond. His hand was extended.

"**Peter"** I missed him. My Confidant. **"Wha… What.."**

"**Shh, come into my office, huh? Jessica, get back to what you were doing"** he nodded his head to her and put his arm around me- walking me into his office.

He shut the door quietly. I looked around the room. His office had a window, a view of the city below on the left side of the room. His desk was situated in the middle, with 2 chairs in front of it. He had a little plant set just behind his chair to the right.

His room was very bright but not too bright to attack your eyes or anything, lots of greens, yellows and whites. His walls were a pale green and his carpet was a dark shade of evergreen. His desk and chairs were a nice yellow-brown color.

To the very far right of the room he had a couch that was the same color as the walls.

The next thing I knew I was being lifted off the ground and in a tight hug. He set me down and motioned me to sit down on the couch.

"**What brings you here bellsy? Not that I'm not happy to see you but…"** he took off his coat and pulled his shirt from under his pants.

"**Its Jasper. He's been acting,… well.. Not himself. Even when we're alone, its like I'm just someone he lives with or a complete stranger. I can even count the numbers of times he's touched me.. Which has basically just been him touching me to pry me off of him, pushing me away… and I…"** I began crying profusely. I was crying so hard it hurt. **"I… think he's seeing someone else…"**

He crushed me in a bear hug. Rubbing my back and shushing me. **"He's cheating on you? I don't understand.. I know when he looks at you.. I can tell he loves you. He really does." **He handed me a tissue** "Are you sure he's just not stressed about some deals from this place?"**

I Looked up at him, wiping my eyes, **"Peter. I'm not stupid. It can't be work, he's been like this for two months!"** I threw my hands up and covered my face, crying yet again.

"**Two months? I know he never leaves the office and when he does its really late and I don't see anyone but men going into his office Bells."**

I felt like he was trying to cover for him. **"Yeah well if cock-blocking your own girlfriend doesn't have I'm fucking a prettier, perfect bodied woman whos 100 times better than you so, why would I bother fucking you.. Written all over it than what does?"**

"**Hey.. Like I said he could be stressed, work could be really affecting him. Do you think he wants to have sex when he's stressed and mad? That would hurt you. You are pretty small after all." **He winked at me.

"**Yeah, but 2 months? He's got to have blue balls and would've cracked already."**

"**That's true. I don't know you'll have to ask him."**

"**I plan on it"** I got up and walked to the door.

"**Hang on sis. I'll get you in there, don't deal with Jessica." **He took my hand and walked with me to his office door.

***JPOV

I saw that brown hair cascading down her back. Mmm. She looked so lovely.

"**What brings you here darlin?"** I licked my lips and her legs widened a little

"**You of course, who else silly?"** such a beautiful voice. She puckered her lips and undid a button of her shirt. **"Now.."** she rose from the chair and sat on my desk. Spinning around to sit in front of me. She opened her legs and I noticed no panties.

She set her long leg on my shoulder with nice black fuck me heels. **"Why don't you take me right now.. While we're alone?" **

I ran my hand up and down her leg slowly. It felt so soft and firm. God, she is a knockout. I stood up and took off my jacket. She cooed and rubbed her hands on my chest. **"If I can't get undressed a little, we can't ravish each other darlin"** I leaned in to kiss her and she stopped me.

"**Keep undressing."** She ordered and fuck did I ever listen. I pulled my shirt from under my pants and undid my belt.. then I heard it.

I heard 2 raps on my door.


	27. Fade To Black

**I don't own twilight or these characters!**

**I know the cliffys make you guys crazy but.. that's just how it goes… heres a little bit to hold you guys over. Although, I don't know if this one is worse than the last but, here goes nothing!!! I will hopefully post a nice long chapter tonight. But lots of people have to ……REVIEW… REVIEW… REVIEW! **

"**Hey Jasper. You still in there?"** Cock-blocking Peter.

I looked in front of me and she was gone. What? Where did she go?

"**Yeah, give me a second."** I yelled. I did my belt back up and was tucking in my shirt when he opened the door.

"**I have a visitor for you"**

"**You know I'm not.."** that's when I saw her, beside Peter taking in my form, with tear stained eyes.

"**You--you know.. I'll just go home, thanks Peter"** she turned on her heel. 

Shit, she has seen me all messy and improper when she knows I almost always dress clean and proper here with a slight boner. But, wait.. It doesn't make sense, wasn't she just in my office?

"**Jasper, what is going on? Where's the fucking hoe you got in here?"** Whoa, why is he so angry?

"**Hoe? What are you talking about? There isn't anyone in here"** She was in here I swear she was. What the fuck is going on? 

"**You alright bro?"** Peter put a hand on my shoulder.

"**Yeah.. I'm fine. Just going to go after my girlfriend"** I went to move away from him but his grip became tighter on my shoulder.

"**She thinks your seeing someone else, having sex with someone else"** he looked down to the floor, **"I know she told me out of confidence but, It doesn't look good for you bro. You've been treating her bad and she feels like she isn't enough for you."**

She is everything I have ever wanted. I have to make this right.

"**Let me go Peter. I'm going to see her now. I thought she was in here before you knocked. "**

I walked out of my office, leaving Peter standing in the middle of it and walked to the elevator. I began feeling dizzy. Not now. I began fighting the dizziness and made it to the basement where I bolted to my parking spot and into my car.

The dizziness is getting much worse, man, this is what I get for not EATING!

I decided to drive anyways and I made my way to Bella's place.

I leaned on the door frame to her apartment. Man, this is hurting me bad. The dizziness had an added migraine like tendency and it killed. I knocked on her door. My head throbbing in pain to every knock. Hopefully she comes to the door right away. No answer. Hmm. I knocked again.

She opened the door, she was in sweats and her eyes were bloodshot red, her hair a mess and damn she still looked so breathtaking.

"**Go away Jasper" **she yelled angrily.

"**Bella…. Please let me explain."**

"**Jasper, just leave me alone. Go back to the girl you left in your office."**

"**The girl left my office Bella." **

"**Oh well I'm glad I cock blocked you. Go running off to find her, don't waste your time here."**

"**Bella" **I reached out to her and she backed away. **"Don't." **I reached for her again. **"Don't fucking touch me." **

She walked to the other side of the room and I followed her. **"Japer, you need to leave. Leave my house now"**

She threw a pillow at me. **"Get the fuck out you scumbag"**

I walked closer to her, knowing it would make her even worse but I had to make her understand **"Bella, I meant **_**you left**_**. I saw **_**you**_** in my office, I don't understand why you were on the other side of the door with Peter, I guess.. I must have been day dreaming that we were about to have a passionate love making session in my office." **I began swaying.

"**Have you been drinking Jasper? I wasn't in your fucking office."**

"**No I haven't I just feel dizzy" **The room began spinning. **"I think I need to sit down""Ohh No! You are leaving now. Go away, Go home, go chase your whore, I don't care. We're through you fucking scumbag!"**

What I heard broke my heart… then everything went black.


	28. Yes

_I don't own twilight or the characters_

_I'm now writing a little more, will update again tonight and more before Christmas._

***BPOV

I was so disgusted and angry with him, I couldn't help it. I snapped **"Ohh No! You are leaving now. Go away, Go home, go chase your whore, I don't care. We're through you fucking scumbag!"**

I saw him sway a little more and then he dropped on my floor like a sack of potatoes.

"**Get up, this ploy isn't going to scare me into staying with you or anything… pick yourself up and get out of my house!"**

He didn't move. I touched his side, trying to tickle him, still not moving..

I began to get very scared. My heart was beating way too fast and my body temperature was rising rapidly.

I knelt down beside him, breathing deeply. I felt for a pulse. He had one.. Good. It felt pretty strong. A Little slow, but strong.

I lifted his head into my lap and ran my fingers through his hair while another hand traced his face. **"Wake up Jasper. Wake Up… please, wake up" **I was too worried to move from my spot to call anyone. I wanted to call Peter but I didn't want to leave Jasper alone.

I kept checking his pulse and his temperature, which seemed okay. Thank god for taking first aid when I first moved here.

After what felt like hours he finally came to.

"**Darlin"** he sounded so weak. I stared into his eyes and he stared into mine for a few minutes. We were just sitting in silence.

"**I'm here, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean what I said. We aren't over. I take it back" **Caressing his face, he tried sitting up and was facing me**"No don't try to sit up right now you just passed out" **I tried to stop him.

"**I'm okay, I swear. Just didn't eat babe." **he smiled and proceeded to sit up, then took both of my hands and bringing them to his lips. Softly kissing them.

I moaned a little at the touch of his lips. It's been a little over two months since I felt his lips. Had him touching me, without pushing me away. I missed his touch.

"**Can I please, explain what you saw today?"** I Nodded. **"I think its all due to not eating.. But… I swear I got to work, started to fill out papers and I looked up and saw you in a secretary outfit, with a real tiny skirt. Teasing me, telling me to get undressed. So, I thought I was doing what you were telling me to.. Sounds dumb huh? That's what I get for pushing you away and giving myself blue balls." **he laughed slightly.

My eyes moved instantly to his dick.. Hmm, I really wonder if he's just as turned on as I am right now.

"**Do I even make sense?"** He lifted my chin, he leaned into my face; his lips were a mere millimetre from my lips.. His blue eyes bore into mine. They looked so sad, he had bags under his eyes and stress lines were on his face, probably from scrunching his face too much lately.

"**You do.. Well I don't get how you would think that it was really me, considering I was working."** He exhaled deeply and It was arousing me even more.

"**I just thought it was a cover up to be a sexy vixen, well.. More then you already are right now. But you know"** he winked. Exhaling again. **"You don't know how much I've missed you Darlin" **he cupped my chin with his hand, the other hand intertwined with my hand.

"**I missed you even more" **I brushed my lips up against his and he smiled..**"I missed everything about you."**

"**You don't know how its tortured me, how it's killed me not to be with you. I haven't even been a good friend let alone lover. I've left you unattended and left myself down too."** He kissed me and I pushed him backwards.

"**Hey.. Not.." **I straddled him over his now very noticeable bulge. **"…fair" **the last word was breathless.

I began sucking on his neck and he started purring. I missed his purring. His hands began massaging my body.. Smacking my ass lightly.

I ground my hips into his erection and he moaned loudly. **"Watch it, its been a while, I'm pretty close to Cumming as it is babe"**

I lifted my head from his neck and looked into his eyes **"Who says I want you to cum yet? You can't until I say"**

"**Anything you want babe, but I wont be able to hold on much longer"** he grabbed my ass roughly and I grinded against his dick again.

"**Your being pleasured first. I have so many dreams that I want to re enact with you."** I pulled off his shirt and massaged his muscles.. He moaned. Making me more wet.

I thoroughly massaged his chest and moved to his shoulders. He was really tense, wow. **"No wonder you were day dreaming of me.. Your shoulders are so tight" **I began roughly massaging his shoulders, trying to work out all the kinks.

"**I'm sure you feel a lot tighter than my shoulders Darlin" **he winked at me and kissed my collar bone. He began rubbing my legs using the same speed I was applying to his shoulders. He was getting closer and closer to my centre. I had to stop him, I was suppose to be pleasing him first.

"**How about we get off this floor and I'll finish my rub?" **He picked me up bridal style. **"Then I get to give you a nice rub"** his hands traveled up my shirt. The feeling of his hands made me moan. They were rough but soft. Very loving. They travelled up my back and undid my bra.

He ran up my stairs taking 3 steps at a time and laid on my bed with me on top of him. I got up and grabbed my oils.

"**Take off your shirt." **He shook his head.

"**You gotta take off your clothes too babe." **he took off his shirt and I was so pleased with what I saw.

His chest was still as lean and muscular just as I remembered it. His left breast had beautiful Latin script with a lasso around a small heart which was dedicated to his mother, His jeans were riding low on his hips, showing those sexy deep v lines I love so much. And that sexy "I'm Lost" script on his right hip.

I had to take off my clothes now, I had to get him back. I took everything off and he was smirking at me, with his head tilted. **"Lay down, I'm not finished. You can stare at me later."**

He laid down and I crawled on top of him, hoping and praying I wouldn't get any wetter. I began massaging his back, working out all the kinks, kissing the spots I finished working on and hearing him moan and groan in satisfaction. **"Remind me to ask you for a daily massage, you are an absolute Angel. This feels so good. Ahhh, That's a bad spot. Darrlinnn" **he began groaning again and to be honest it was making me feel so damn horny.

I feel like a horny teenager but fuck, when you don't get laid in over 2 months, the littlest thing turns you on. Except for me, Jazz always turns me on. 1 kiss, 1 touch, even his voice, his eyes, the way he walks, how his body moves.

Do I sound like a love struck idiot? Yes.

Have I found my other half? My soul mate?

Yes.

Has Edward finally left my dreams…

Heart…

Mind…

And soul… alone?

Yes.


	29. Another Issue

_I don't own twilight or the characters_

"**Okay, your turn Darlin" **he flipped us over and was on top of me, again smirking. It was so sexy. **"Except I can just make love to you now.. Mm.. I know it. Your wetter than rain in April." **He lowered himself and began massaging my feet. Did it ever feel good. I felt electric shocks all over my body. I was going to lose it. Holy fuck.

He massaged my calves next. **"You know, we could make the secretary thing true. You can come work for me and stop being on your feet all day at that coffee shop. I hate the thought of you always making yourself so sore and slaving away at a coffee shop when you can take it easy and work somewhere where you'll be appreciated more."**

Not this again. **"Jazz. I love working there. Sure the money isn't that great but the people are nice and Ange and Mike are so great."**

He lifted his body to have his face in front of mine **"I know, I need a new secretary though. You'd be perfect. I hate being hit on by girls and especially Jessica, why can't you take her place, temporally until I find someone, please? If you do like it you can have it permanently. Please?"**

"**Okay Jazz but you know what's going to happen? The whole office is going to say I'm fucking the boss so that's how I got the job." **

He smiled at me and lowered himself down to where he stopped massaging me.

"**Even though you are, doesn't mean shit. You know I would've hired you even if we didn't get together. Your so much better than Jessica, you elude sexiness without even trying. You also keep your clothes on in public, I would have a better image of my company."**

He began kissing the inside of my thighs. I began moving closer to his mouth. He smirked at me **"Your really getting riled up aren't you?" **his hands held down my hips, preventing me from moving and he began slowly kissing my thighs again. He was inching closer to my centre, I'm breathing heavily, not able to take the suspense any longer.

His tongue met my centre. I came undone, the tension in my stomach was building so much I couldn't take it.. Before I had a chance to orgasm he stopped.

"**Ugh, that's not fair Jazz" **He smiled and flipped me onto my back.

"**What isn't fair is when you aren't releasing on my dick.. that's a pleasure much better than what my tongue can give."** I tensed my back and moaned. He is going to be the death of me.

Just when I thought I couldn't be any more aroused.. He used his mouth in a thrilling way.. His face moving to the lower part of my back, his mouth and tongue sucking and licking my lower back, making me even wetter then I have ever imagined. He can smell it now, no question about it, he was breathing heavily too. **"You taste so good.. Mmmm smell so good" **he stopped massaging my back and just began breathing deeply. **"Are you ready Darlin?" **he turned me around to face him.

"**I've waited my entire life Cowboy"** he entered me and we both moaned at the contact. He thrusted in and out slowly. **"Shit, I forgot how good this feels. I won't be able to hold out for too long its been too long." **It felt so good. We weren't going too rough or too fast, we were just taking it slow and making the most of our time joined together like this.

"**I don't care just as long as its you" **I kissed his lips and hugged him closer to me.

"**Forever Darlin" **he caressed my clit and I felt myself clamp down onto him.

"**Fuuuuucccckkk" **he groaned into my ear and fell over the edge himself.. I felt his seed spill into me… making me cum again, clamping down on his dick and milking him for all he was worth.

"**I love you cowboy. I never want you to apart from me ever again. Emotionally, physically, mentally…. Never again." **I planted kisses all over his face.

I felt his hand find its way to my cheek.

"**Darlin.. I was dying without you. I'm sorry. Never again." **he kissed me with so much passion, we fell back into horny teenager mode.

**JPOV**Some Months Later**

"**Mmm. Let Me Go Jazz"** she whined. She was soo cute when she did that, no way is she getting out of here.

"**No, your staying in this bed all day."** I kissed her head and pulled her closer.

"**No seriously let me go" **she began clawing at my arms.

I let her go and she ran into the bathroom.. Sick again..

I have to remember to get some inspectors at that restaurant. About 2 weeks ago we went to this restaurant to celebrate being together for 2 years, needless to say, it was a bad place. We both were down sick. Bella taking longer to get better. It was horrible. She's losing a lot of weight and there isn't anything the doctor can do. Just said to wait it out and be sure to eat regardless if she throws it back up.

I got up out of bed and went to the bathroom. I held her hair back and she was moaning over the toilet, in pain. My heart broke, I hate seeing her like this, I knelt down and put my hand on her back, rubbing soothing circles.

"**Are you okay Darlin? Want any water or anything? I hate seeing you like this." **She moaned again and I thought I was going to cry. **"Here Darlin" **I scooped her up carefully, trying not to move her too much in fear she would throw up again. I took easy, soft strides back to our bed and laid her down carefully. **"I'll be right back baby"** I kissed her forehead and went back to the bathroom.

I raided the cabinet for the pills she was given 4 days ago, a cup of water and a cold compress. I walked back to her, only to see her curled up in the fetal position. **"Darlin.. Here you'll feel a little better with this."** I helped her sit up and gave her the pills. I set a cold compress on her forehead, **"Do you want some food darlin? Some soup?" **I felt her face, she was burning up. **"No.. just some of your tonic… and I need to brush my teeth.. Please?"**

"**Of course Darlin.. I'll be right back, don't you dare move from this bed." **I took off down the stairs and began working on my mama's tonic. It was a strawberry tonic, it worked for every sickness known to man, well the colds and flu.

I had to call Peter, I couldn't leave Bella here all alone this sick.

"**Whitlock's Contracting, Peter Whitlock speaking."**

"**Hey Pete, Its Jasper."**

"**Hey Jay, you sound better. How's Bella?"**

"**I'm alright, Bella is still very sick. I can't leave her here alone, I hate to do this to you but your going to have to take my place today.""You leave me in a bad spot, I'm sure I can handle it. You just tend to that lovely sister of mine. I hope she feels better. Give her a kiss for me will you?""Yeah I will. Sorry Pete. Thanks again."**

"**Don't worry about it. Take care bro.""Yeah, love you too you big sap"**

He laughed and hung up.

I then thought of my Doc. It'd be bad and she's not only my family doc. But my physiatrist but Bella needs a second opinion she's still not better, when she should be.

"**Hello. Doctor Masen's Office, Alice speaking how may I help you?"**

"**Hi Alice, Jasper Whitlock here.. Is Dr. Masen Free this morning?"**

"**I'm afraid your appointment isn't for another week, is anything wrong Jasper?"**

"**My girlfriend is really sick and I need a second opinion. Can you please see if Dr. Masen will see her..?"**

"**Jazzzzzz…. Ouch!!!"** That didn't sound good.

"**Hang on Alice" **I ran up the stairs. **"Jasss…per…. It hurts… owwww" **I was right by her side.. **"What hurts Darlin?"**

****another Cliff hanger. Sorry guys! Lol****


	30. Welcoming Darkness

I don't own twilight or the characters

I Feel REALLY AWFUL even Thinking and WRITING this chapter. Don't hate me…. Please! I have one more chapter that is done and ready to post and I am writing on another one. Everything will be fine.

One reviewer said they think Carlisle made her sick on purpose - Carlisle has NOTHING to do with this. Haha. Nice guess though! Esme is Edwards Mother - who goes by her maiden name when practicing medicine and is Jasper's Physiatrist and doctor, Cullen is a last name she used outside of her profession..

Let me know your thoughts, I know most of you will be upset with me!

---------

"**Everything… oh my.. Make it stop Jasper" **she grabbed my shoulder..

"**Hello Jasper, she can see you if you come right now. Come to the hospital.. Not the office."**

"**Okay Thank you. We will." **I hung up

"**Darlin.. I'm taking you to my doctor okay? I'm going to get us both dressed, lift you up and put you in the car okay?" **

"**okay… just make it stop." **

"**I will darlin.. Okay you first, nice comfy pants okay… just don't move, I'll do this." **I took off her shorts carefully and slipped on some comfy pants. **"It still hurts Jazz"** she cried out in pain. Fuck me.

I found some jeans and a belt, pulling them up quickly and grabbing a black sweater and throwing it on. Stupid November. I threw a coat on myself and grabbed another coat for Bella and draped it over her. **"Try and hang on to me and the coat babe. I really don't want to move you and hurt you, but I have to okay? Trust me." **

I lifted her and she bit her lip and winced in pain.** "I do trust you. I Love you its okay. Just get me there." **

I kissed her forehead and carefully walked down the stairs and out to the car.

I picked up my phone, freaking out I called the one girl I know who'd come running.

"**Hey Roz.. Can you meet me at St Joe's hospital in about 5 minutes?""What's going on Jasper?""Fuck it not enough time-Something's wrong with Bella, I need you. "**

"**We're there in 7 minutes. Love you.""Yes Love you too Bye"**

"**Hang in there darlin.. Another two minutes."**

I parked the car, not caring if I took up 2 parking rows and didn't pay for a parking ticket. I picked Bella up carefully as she winced again. **"Sorry Darlin I have to do this, okay?"** She nodded and I took off inside the hospital and was met with Alice, **"Hey, put her on here"** she pointed to a medical bed. **"Name? Date of Birth? Any Allergies? When did this all start? I won't make her talk.. So you have to tell me."** she wheeled Bella into an examination room. She was now screaming in pain. **"Miss, I'm going to give you something for the pain okay?"** she took out a syringe and put it in her arm.

"**Now Jasper, start talking."**

"**Bella Swan. This started 2 weeks ago. This pain started when I called you today. No allergies and she's 23."**

"**Bella Swan? Oh my." **

"**What.. Whats wrong?"**

"**Jasper?!?!" **Thank god Rosalie was here. **"Roz in here examination 3"** She walked in and had the same look on her face like Alice did when I said Bella's name. **"What are you doing here Alice?" **Rosalie looked like she was going to kill her. **"What's going on Roz?"**

"**This is Edward's Sister.**"

I couldn't believe what I was hearing **"What? She's what?" **

"**Where's Edward bitch? If he is here, he's going to wish he never set a foot through those doors."** Rosalie was walking forwards towards Alice. I set part of my body between them.

"**Rosalie, Edward is not here. He does work here as a Doctor though. Esme is here, I have to call her to see Bella. Afterall, it's the reason we're all here."** She stood out from behind me and stood right in front of me. Fuck, I need to prevent this shit.

"**Yeah fuck you it isn't you pixie bitch"** she was walking closer.

"**Roz, get the fuck to Bella's side. Please? She needs us."** Bella whipered and Rosalie forgot why she was angry and ran to Bella's side. Emmett was posted at the door like a police escort.

"**Yeah well, tell that to Jasper who's doctor is my mother. If you'll excuse me I need to get the Help Bella needs."** she walked out of the room

"**Don't worry baby, Eddie isn't coming in here. He's gotta see me first." **Emmett winked and slapped me on the back.

We all sat next to Bella holding her hands. I had my face to her ear, telling her it was going to be okay and how much I loved her.

Just then Dr. Masen walked through the door. **"Esme!"** Emmett jumped up and hugged the doc. **"Why if it isn't my favorite Bear. Hello Emmett.. Oh Rosalie!" **she pulled Rosalie into a hug. **"Hi Esme. You already know why we're here" **

"**Oh yes. Jasper, your girlfriend seems to be in a lot of pain isn't she?" **she picked up her chart and her smile faded. **"Isabella Swan? Oh me oh my… my poor baby."** she made us all move away while she checked her vitals.

"**This isn't good. What's happened?"** she was now paging someone.

"**Well, we both had food poisoning about 2 weeks ago and she still hasn't recovered."**

"**This isn't good. I think I know what is happening here.. But I need some tests done to confirm. I need you all to leave the room for a few minutes. I will call you all in when I am done."**

I kissed my lovely girl's forehead. **"I'll be right back Darlin.. You won't have a chance to miss me." **I heard her breathe deeply. **"Mm. Love you. Beautiful. Its okay, its just Esme and she will take good care of you okay? Roz, Em and I wouldn't if she meant you any harm." **Rosalie tugged me by the arm pulling me out of the room. I let her, I had to. I now had to suffer in the waiting room, which I didn't like.

***BPOV

I don't understand what exactly is going on. I don't understand why I hurt everywhere. The pain is unbearable. Why aren't they giving me more medication. I hear Esme's voice, . **"Isabella Swan? Oh me oh my… my poor baby."** Thank god she's here. I'd definitely want to die than have Carlisle or Edward be near me. I couldn't really hear anything else. The pain was unbearable.

I smelt something so sweet, something that lessened the throbbing rage of pain that was coursing through my body like a brushfire…Mmm. I didn't want the smell to leave. That's when I heard him. My reason for living now, the reason I want to be in pain no longer. **"I'll be right back Darlin.. You won't have a chance to miss me." **I breathed in his scent so deeply over and over again, trying to dull my pain, he's so calming, don't leave me love. Don't leave! **"Mm. Love you. Beautiful."** I Love You, I Love You, I Love you.. A million times I love you.. You beautiful blond fuzzy faced angel.. Don't leave please stay!!! Ugh. Why couldn't he hear me? "**Its okay, its just Esme and she will take good care of you okay? Roz, Em and I wouldn't if she meant you any harm." **The sweet scent faded away and I felt my pain come back ten-fold. Bring him back. Bring my angel back!

"**Bella, Its Esme Sweetheart. I need to draw some blood, I know you are in a lot of pain, I will give you some more medication when I get some blood from you. Please, try to stay still. I will try and be very, very gentle with you baby." **Esme. Oh Esme. Just hurry. I felt a prick of a needle. Fuck that hurt. **"Bella, if you can hear me squeeze my hand honey." **I was trying with all my might to squeeze her hand. I felt darkness creeping in. What is going on? A fog gazed over my already fuzzy vision. No, I am not dying here. No way. No. Come on Bella Fight!

The pain was overwhelming me. I gave into the darkness. I couldn't fight two battles at once. I'm sorry my love. I Love you. A million times I love you. I started walking into the darkness. Every step closer to the darkness was lessening the pain.. Ahh.. Relief. Finally. Goodbye. Everything went pitch black.

***ESPOV

Little did I know I would be working on Isabella Swan. The girl who was like my Daughter. I think I know exactly what this is. It is either one of two options and they aren't good. I have to get this blood to the lab as soon as possible, I need to know what I'm dealing with.

I closed the wound I made with the needle to abstract her blood with a Band-Aid. I grabbed her hand, almost cold. Not good. **"Bella, if you can hear me squeeze my hand honey." **I felt a weak squeeze. Her eyes were still closed ever since the room was cleared. I had to check her vitals again. I flashed a light in both eyes, not responsive. I checked her pulse and it was slowing down.. She's going into cardiac arrest. Fuck me.

Taking off my coat and jumping up on the bed, hovering over Isabella trying not to add pressure to her body I began compressions, screaming through the partly opened door.

"**I need a nurse and a crash cart, code blue."** I kept the reps in my head. _One, Two.. Three… Four… Five…. _


	31. Call It

_I don't own twilight or the characters.. Heres another little bit… another cliffy.. Hahaha.. Sorry guys!_

_Happy Holidays!_

---

I breathed into her mouth. I had to yell again, Fucking nurses. I yelled even louder, pushing my voice to its limit.

"**CODE BLUE, CRASH CART AND A NURSE!"** Alice flitted into the room with a crash cart.

… _One… Two… Three…_

"**Oh no… Esme.." **Alice began setting the crash cart

… _Four… Five… Breathe.._

"**Don't fucking remind me Alice.. Just help me"** I will not let her die like her father had those years ago. She is not suppose to die like this.

I looked over at the door and I see Jasper hunched onto the door frame, he looked like his whole reason for living was gone.

…_Two…Three.. _

"**Jasper.. Go into the waiting room. I will get you later. Don't worry, she will not die."** He punched the door frame and walked away. Great, I'll deal with him later

…_. Breathe…_

"**Paddles Doctor"** I hopped off the gurney and Alice's hands took my place, keeping with compressions.

"**CLEAR"** I shocked her chest. Her body jumped up and hit the bed. Thu-Thump. That didn't sound good.

I let Alice do another round of compressions. **"CLEAR!" **I shocked her again.

Come on Bella.

Her body hit the gurney with a hard resounded Thu-thump. Fuck.

Don't you dare give up now, you've been through so much, come on honey.

I upped the electricity and shocked her again. Again, her body falling hard onto the gurney.

Thu-Thump.

***JPOV

"**I need a nurse and a crash cart, code blue."** That wasn't coming from Bella's room. There's no way. It's someone else. It HAS to be someone else.

She was breathing 3 minutes ago.

"**CODE BLUE, CRASH CART AND A NURSE!"** I saw Alice hop over the nurses desk and take off into the direction of Bella's room. I followed. I had to make sure it wasn't my Darlin girl.

I walked near the room and I heard her. **"Oh no.. Esme.." **Alice was shocked. This had to be bad. **"Don't fucking remind me Alice.. Just help me"** Doc Masen Snapped.

I suddenly remembered what Bella told me of her Dad's accident. On the road to the Cullens home, Esme's sick husband doing on compressions over her father, Esme trying to steady his bleeding.. How he was dying on the road.

The blood rushed out of my head, the air left my lungs, my heart stopped beating. This can't happen to her, please god, I can't lose the best thing to ever happen to me. It began raining harshly inside of me. My clear-sky and bright sunshine was gone.

No, she isn't gone. She won't. She won't leave me, I know she won't come on Bella. Fight.

I was about to walk into the room, .. **"Jasper.. Go into the waiting room. I will get you later. Don't worry, she will not die."** Fucking Esme.

I punched the frame of the door, effectively bending the ring into my knuckle and denting the doorframe in the process. Fuck. I was pissed. I can't just sit in the fucking waiting room, what the fuck does she take me for?

I headed outside for some air. No good sitting around for some fucking doc to tell me my reason for living is gone. I lit up a cigarette and began to smoke. Yeah, bad habit, can kill you and shit. What do I care? If Bella dies, there isn't a reason for me to be around.

***ESPOV

Alice began to tire. **"Let's switch Alice, here.." **she moved away from Bella and I continued the rhythm.

I noted what time it was. We've been going at this for about 5 minutes now, another minute and I will have to call time of death. Or she'll be severely brain damaged or be on machines for the rest of her life..

As a vegtable..probably die within hours.

If the latter didn`t happen It was hopeless then.

"**Clear"** moved my hands and Alice shocked her.

"**Esme, I think we need to decide to call TOD. She's gone. As much as I'd hate to admit it, she's no longer with us… Time of Death.."**


	32. Reminiscing

_I don't own twilight or the characters.. Sorry for the ciffys but I thought they were needed. Definitely added suspense! LolMERRY CHRISTMAS! This should hold you over for a day or two._

--

"**WAIT" **I felt a faint heartbeat. **"I've got a heart beat, its faint but its there. I need to… I'm going to make her breathe." **I put an IV in her arm and gave her another shot of adrenaline and some steroids through her IV.

I made put a breathing tube in hooked her up to a machine. **"Alice, the blood is on the counter, take it to the lab and tell them to rush It please. I'll stay here with Bella. Send Jasper in on your way please." **

"**Yes, right away Esme."** She took off out of the room.

I stroked Bella's cheek. My beautiful girl. The daughter I wish I had instead of a son. **"I need you to fight this Bella. Come on, get your second wind and fight baby.. Just fight." **

***APOV

I couldn't believe Esme kept fighting with Isabella. Why wouldn't she call time of death. I mean with anyone else we do it. She was almost out of our lives. She ruined Edward's life completely. He became mentally and emotionally unstable because of her.

She ripped apart my family.

No more Emmett, Rosalie. Mom and Dad Broke up, all because of her.

And to top it off she had the guy I wanted most of all. Why does she get everything?

I don't have anything against her but a part of me wishes she would die already, to give me back my family and give me the guy I love. I have loved him since I saw him a few years ago.

Speaking of Jasper, I wonder where he is.. I went to the lab first, seeing as though Esme wanted her blood on rush. I walked down a hallway and made it to the stairs. I sat on the railing and flew down the stairs. Hey! I'm small enough, why not?

"**Doctor Masen wants this blood tested, I'm assuming full panel and it's a rush." **

I signed the clipboard and I went back to the other side of the hospital that I was working. I searched the waiting room and saw Rose and Emmett. I waved with a small smile and noticed a figure standing outside, hmm.. Maybe that's Jasper.

I walked outside and headed to the bench, I sat down beside him. **"I hope this seat isn't taken." **I smiled a little and bent over a little to see his face better.

"**S'not. What brings you out here? Its freezing." **He looked up at me and I was thinking of what to do to him, thank god he's not some mind reader.

Although, if he was he'd probably want to test out some of my ideas, I licked my lips…. Oh shit he talked. Right.

"**Bella seems to be okay right now. She's not out of the woods but we've pulled her out of her first obstacle."** I rubbed his arm.

He felt so warm and he smelt good, well minus the smoke he was inhaling. **"Be honest. Do you think she's going to live through this?" **He looked me dead in the eyes. He actually looked dead.

I put my arms around him, pulling him closer to me and breathing him in- really lightly so he wouldn't notice. **"Honestly. Its too early to tell. I do hope so though." **I smiled at him. I really did want her to live. I just wanted the guy of my dreams and my family back. That's all. I did love her as a sister, I was just a little bitter still..

"**I hope so Too Alice, I hope so too" **he rubbed my back. **"You must be Freezin"** his touch and voice was so sexy. **"Its okay, your warm. So it helps."** I snuggled closer.

"**I'm sure it does Alice.. We should get inside." **he stood up, offering his hand to help me up. Another reason to love him. **"Can I see Bella now?" **Damn it!

"**Yes you can"** I put my hand in his and he lifted me up, except his hand dropped from mine the moment I stood up and began walking. Damn it.

I walked with him into the hospital and he walked into Bella's room. **"Darlin…" **Ugh, I didn't need to hear his sexy voice talking to her. Ew. I headed to the lounge to eat something, its probably my break by now anyways.

***JPOV

Why is she trying to snuggle up to me? Well, dumb ass it is cold out and she's just trying to show you some support. I need to see Bella now, this shit is messing with me.

I helped Alice up like a good gentleman would and headed inside to see my sleeping beauty.

"**Darlin" **I rushed to her side. Dragging a chair right beside her bed. I grabbed her small, soft hand and held it with my hand. Her hand felt a bit cold. Thanks to me, probably.

"**She's alright for now Jasper. I'm going to check on some other patients. If you need me or something happens.. God forbid. Just call for Alice or a nurse. I will be around….Hang in there."** Esme.I nodded to her and she walked out of the room. Closing the door behind her.

"**Darlin.. You need to fight and wake up. You know my blue eyes miss those big brown eyes of yours. Quit hiding them." **

I lifted her hand to my lips and kissed her hand.. Over and over again. I knew she could hear me, feel me… I just needed to be near her, for her to know I wasn't going to leave.

"**I Love you"**

I kept thinking back to when we first met and even then, I was drawn to her. For no reason at all, I felt compelled to her.

Well, that and she made my Dick twitch more times in a minute then any other woman in my life.

That first time her lips touched my skin. I knew right then and there, she was mine.

I thought about how I fucked up twice.

How she still took me back. I would not fuck up a third time.

I just hope the lord above will grant her a 2nd chance at life and we'll have our life that we should have.

I heard the door click open, I didn't even move. I was just staring at my sleeping beauty, minus the breathing apparatus covering most of her face and the I.V that was stuck in her other arm, and the annoying beeping of the machine.

I felt a pair of hands touch my shoulders.

"**Jasper." **


	33. Diagnosis

_I don't own twilight or the characters.. Sorry for the ciffy again LONG CHAPTER!_

--

I sighed.

"**It's okay man. Just thought you could use some legs so you don't fall on your face."**

I turned around. There he was. Peter. I stood up and gave him a hug.

"**What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be with Char.."****"She's fine. She's with the Major. Rose is there too. You know the 3 of them hate this place and I was sent as the good brother and informant. You know how it goes."** He smiled. And slapped my back. 

Charlotte's heavily pregnant and about 8 months along. I can see why Peter flew solo. Her looking at Bella would kill her.

"**What happened Jay?" **He pulled up another chair, to sit in front of me.

"**Where's Emmett?" **If he wasn't with Rose, then where he hell is he?

"**He's getting you some clothes, food, coffee and he's the guard dog apparently."** he chuckled.

"**Oh, he didn't have to do that Pete. I'm fine. I don't care about myself, until Bella is safe at home with me."**

He leaned into me and put a hand on my shoulder again.

"**Jasper, if you don't take care of yourself you cant take care of her. We need you one hundred and ten percent here… understand? We all do. Bella included." **

"**I know dumb ass. I just.. I feel empty. Its not fair. She lies here while I go off eating and doing normal things."**

"**I Know man.. But no sleep, haven't eaten, haven't changed, no breaks.. And best of all, not perfectly medicated. Now more than ever we need to keep the red demon at bay. You know who she's going to hurt the most if she saw you like this, herself. Do you want that?""No. I know Pete. I just can't leave her."**

"**Alright, I'll just bring the clothes and Coffee in here okay? Give me your keys, I'll stay at your place, here are my car keys. Anything goes on, call me." "You just want to raid my fridge fucker.""Maybe that's true but you do live the closest to here so, sue me."**

**I stood up and gave him another hug, this time I squeezed him pretty hard and he did the same.**

"**Drive safe..""I always do kiddo. Get better Bells." **He kissed her hand and gave me a wave and out the door he went.

I sat down again, thinking about us. Over and over again.

"**I come barring Coffee and clothes. Yum!""Hey Mett."**

"**Any changes?" **he leaned down and hugged me **"Here.. Black 2 sugars, your favourite."**

"**Still the same, thanks man. What time is it?" **ahh he remembered. It tasted like heaven. Well… almost.**"It's 3am, Saturday morning."**

"**Saturday? I've been up over 24 hours?"** not possible.

"**Yeah you have. You should take a look in the mirror, you aren't a pretty fuck." **he laughed 

"**Screw you ugly mutt" **I kicked him in the shin. 

"**Has the Doc been here yet?"**

"**No. I'm going crazy."**

"**Alright, I'll go see if I can fetch Alice or a nurse to find Doc. I'll be right back"**

"**Yeah, go."**

He walked out of the room and I rested my head on her hand.

_Mmmm._

I jumped. What the hell. 

I looked up and those big brown eyes were staring back at me in terror. 

The machine was going wild, her heart rate was through the roof. I knew damn well of that.

"**Shhh. Your alright Darlin. It's just me, your trusty cowboy. We're in the hospital. Emmett's outside being your guard dog. Don't worry, your completely safe honey. Don't panic." **

Her eyes began to water and her heart rate was slowing. 

Fuck this.

I moved her over slightly and hopped in the bed with her, brushing away her tears.

"**Its okay, don't cry. Shhh.. Its okay."**

_Mmmm _

"**You scared me for a moment, I know what you mean though. I missed you too. Much too much for my liking."**

I kissed her forehead. **"I meant to talk to you earlier today, but it'll wait until we get you all better and home.. And I will only ask you yes or no questions. For yes, squeeze my hand twice and once for no. okay? It just makes it easier on you." **

She squeezed my hand twice. **"Do you feel any pain?" **

Yes

"**It it only a little bit?"**

No

"**Do you want me to get the doctor?"**

No

Just then the doctor and Emmett walked in the door.

"**Oh Hello Bella. I'm so glad you woke up!" **Esme flitted to Bella's side and began checking her vitals.

"**Mett.. Call Peter tell him Bella is awake. Please"** I threw him my cell phone.

"**Alright. Hi Baby swan, I'll hug you later when you won't break" **he winked at her and walked out of the room. Bella tightened her hold on my hand.

"**Bella, you have nothing to fear my little one. The two who will remain unnamed are not in this hospital. I have requested them both to have no access to this floor, due to "personal reasons" that's enough to get them fired from here if they try. I can even get fired for treating you, but no one needs to know I'm your mother now do they?" **She smiled at her **"Do try and calm yourself now sweetie."**

"**Jasper can you just leave the room for a moment? I need to take out the breathing tube and I need to do a pap smear. You understand don't you? Your perfectly safe with me Honey. Jasper will just be outside the door and I'll call for him the second we're done alright?"**

Damn it. **"Alright doc. I'll do what you say." **I leaned in and kissed Bella's head. **"I love you Darlin… I'll be back before you can miss me"** I kissed her forehead again and walked out of the room.

***BPOV

Its so dark, the pain is so strong.

Someone make it stop.

I hear mumbling and that sweet smell.

I can't make it out. Speak louder!

"**I love you" **I knew that voice belonged to my beautiful, blond fuzzy faced angel.

I Love you so much.. Why can't you hear me?

Whyyyy?

My eyes opened. Oh no. Edward got to me. 

What did they do to my angel? What did he do to me? What is Carlisle doing to me?

So much pain, oh no. He's killing me isn't he? Oh my god.

"**Shhh. Your alright Darlin. It's just me, your trusty cowboy. We're in the hospital. Emmett's outside being your guard dog. Don't worry, your completely safe honey. Don't panic." **

My beautiful blond angel came into complete focus, but he had heavy dark circles under his eyes, his hair was a mess, his lovely blue eyes were filled with emotion and looked like he was pained. 

Stress lines were present on his forehead. 

His face was too pale for his lightly tanned complexion. Oh, he stayed with me.. 

Oh no, the pain he had to endure. The stress and lack of sleep.

It was all because of am I so weak and sick. 

I felt my body move slightly more to the left and next thing I knew my cowboy was in my bed with me

"**Its okay, don't cry. Shhh.. Its okay."**

I missed you so much!

"**You scared me for a moment, I know what you mean though. I missed you too. Much too much for my liking."**

He kissed my forehead. I missed those soft, kissable, tender lips of his touching my skin, my lips, my hands. 

"**I meant to talk to you earlier today, but it'll wait until we get you all better and home.. And I will only ask you yes or no questions. For yes, squeeze my hand twice and once for no. okay? It just makes it easier on you." **he looked stressed, I was glad he decided to do this awkward communication with me.

I understood him and squeezed his hand twice. 

"**Do you feel any pain?" **

Yes I do.

"**It it only a little bit?"**

No, its killing me. This pain is unbearable.

"**Do you want me to get the doctor?"**

No. Stay. You are dulling it. I went too long without you. Stay!

"**Oh Hello Bella. I'm so glad you woke up!" **Esme hovered over me. What? Esme is still here? I focussed in on what she was doing.

If there was one of the Cullens I could trust, I knew it was her. Afterall, she left her husband and sweetheart of her childhood for me. 

"**Alright. Hi Baby swan, I'll hug you later when you won't break" **he winked at me. You will always be close to breaking me anyways Emmett. You big Teddy bear.

"**Bella, you have nothing to fear my little one. The two assholes who will remain unnamed are not in this hospital. I have requested them both to have no access to this floor, due to "personal reasons" that's enough to get them fired from here if they try. I can even get fired for treating you, but no one needs to know I'm your mother now do they?" **She smiled that heart warming smile of hers that I have always loved

"**Do try and calm yourself now sweetie."**

Okay mom. I will.

"**Jasper can you just leave the room for a moment? I need to take out the breathing tube and I need to do a pap smear. You understand don't you? Your perfectly safe with me Honey. Jasper will just be outside the door and I'll call for him the second we're done alright?"**

No please! Don't send him away, last time that happened my world went black. No.

"**Alright doc. I'll do what you say." **

I felt those soft tender lips kiss my forehead. I love you.

"**I love you Darlin… I'll be back before you can miss me"**

He kissed my forehead again. I Already miss you, you stupid love struck cowboy.

It felt like hours but she finally finished the smear. And finally.. Took out the uncomfortable tube.

"**I know its not fun dear. I will have your test results in about half an hour. Are you still feeling severe pain?"**

"**Yes, I am. Will it ever go away?" **My throat was hoarse and she gave me some water.**"I'll give you some more medication. Hopefully we'll know soon what is going on. I just want to be sure to rule out all other possibilities."**

I sat there in silence. Staring at the door. Waiting for Jasper to be allowed to come back in.

"**You both really love each other don't you?""Yes, I love him with everything I am."**

"**I know he loves you whole heartedly. When you came in yesterday. He was completely devoid of any emotion. I haven't seen the life sucked out of him for years. You two have something special. I'm proud of you both. I just hope you will make it work for you better than It did for myself."**

"**Esme, you will find someone better for you. He wasn't the one. I love you, really I do. You are the mother I should've had.""You are the daughter I wish I had instead of a son……Anyways, I will be back shortly, I will send that beautiful boyfriend of yours back in. If you need anything page the nurse. Okay?""I will mom. See you soon."**

She kissed my cheek and walked out of the room. Not even a second later Jasper walked in. My sexy cowboy with his sexy walk.

***JPOV

"**I love you cowboy"**

I longed to hear those words for the last 30 hours.

"**I love you too cowgirl"**

I was blessed with such a remarkable girl.

"**How you holdin up though?" **I wasn't stupid she'd just claim she was okay when she wasn't.

"**Still in some pain. Esme should be back soon."**

"**I sure hope so."**

I climbed back into the hospital bed with her and held her in my arms, snuggling against her body.

"**So we needed to talk?""Something that I should've told you from the beginning."**

Esme came running through the door.

"**Jasper, this is for you"** she handed me a small white cup and a few pills.

"**What? Why does he need that?" **Bella look horrified.

"**Its what we have to talk about. Its not life threatening, it wont kill me.. don't worry. When you're better we'll talk Darlin…" **fuck. I wish It could be in my own time. I felt my anxiety melt away ten fold. No doubt I was going to be flying high soon, fuck. 

"**What brings you here Doctor Masen?"** Even though she was Bella's mother in a sense, I still felt obligated to call her Doctor.

"**I have the results, from the blood I had taken has produced.."**

"**And? What is it Doctor?" **I had a feeling it wasn't good at all.

"**I'm afraid Bella. Your pregnant." **

What? Pregnant? That's not bas news at all this is great!

I kissed Bella, with much intensity. Stupid on my part because she kissed me back with twice as much enthusiasm and it made my dick twitch involuntary.

"**So? Does she just have to be on some medication or anything?""No, Bella… Jasper… the condition is called…"**


	34. I'm Sorry

_**I don't own twilight or the characters.. **_

_**I know the cliffys suck! I hate them too.. But how else will you keep reading?!?**_

_**Besides, I'm just iching to keep posting this story! **_

_**I may post a few more chapters tonight I have two more ready to post after this one so… we'll see, I've hit a slight writters block. But Review away!!!**_

**--**

"**.. its called… Pre-Eclampsia Syndrome. I'm surprised she hasn't shown any symptoms before yesterday. ""What it is- its basically a shallow placenta which becomes hypoxic, in Bella's case, severely hypoxic. There is a lack of immunological tolerance in the pregnancy and its making Bella's immune system to protect her againest paternal antigens that is produced from the fetus and the placenta. Her body is in full force on a self destructive mission trying to destroy the tissues surrounding the fetus. I need to do an ultrasound to see how the baby is doing."**

I was in shock. I felt like my Father was beating the crap out of me.

I couldn't breathe. I felt like the red demon was having a field day with my body.

"**How…. How far along… is it? Will he… or she… be okay?"** She was almost in tears.

I felt the red-eyed demon try to swallow me whole. I was losing the fight at keeping him at bay.

"**From what I can tell between maybe 3 or 3 and a half months. I'll have you wheeled down to another room where the ultrasound is. Jasper if you'll get out of the bed please…" **

I hopped out and took Bella's hand. The doc grabbed another nurse and we started out of the room down to an ultrasound.

Why does the bad stuff happen to me?

Why couldn't I have a nice, normal pregnancy? And have a child?

Oh that's right, the demon possessing me won't let me have anything.

I'm even lucky to still have Bella.

"**Jasper.. Why are you doing that?" **

She knew. She always knew when I was beating myself up.

She smiled at me, it was full of love..

It made the red-eyed monster melt away.

"**I'm fine beautiful. Don't you worry until we get home."**

I smirked at her and she giggled. That giggle made me stifle a laugh. **"Okay cowboy." **

We made it into the room, I wanted to jump back in there with her.

"**Jasper, here is a chair for you."**

Doc dragged a chair over for me and moved Bella's hospital gown out of the way.

She applied Jelly to her stomach and turned the machine on.

It made a weird noise. Sort of like white noise, which I hated. I grabbed Bella's hand again. We were so excited to see our baby.

"**Heres where the uterus should sit with the baby." **she pointed the spot and then pointed out the other. **"And for Bella, this is where the Baby sits… hold on.."**

She measured the difference between both spots.

"**Oh this isn't good. I'm going to be completely honest. There is about a 4 inch difference between where it should be and where it is. But let's check on the baby shall we?"**

Doc went further down her stomach… **"As you can see the baby is hiding if it's a he or she." **

I stifled a laugh. **"That was like me all those years ago. I wouldn't show my mama if I was a boy or girl either." **I laughed again.

Esme's face twisted up in pain. **"Oh no. I was afraid of this." **

"**Whats wrong Esme?" **Bella sat up. I put my arm behind her so she'd have a better view.

"**See this here?" **Doc pointed out the area around this bubble.. **"That is the placenta. Its what your immune system is attacking. And this here, as you can see" **She pointed out the bubble. **"Is the protective sac that your baby sits in. and this here…" **she pointed out something in the bubble. **"is a gap. Its not suppose to be there whatsoever. Your immune system has effectively made it through the protective sac." **

I stopped breathing. My Heart Sped up. The blood in my veins rushing through me with the added effect of adrenaline.

I saw red.

The red-eyed demon was back, spilling over the surface, this time.. I wasn't fighting him.

Her eyes began welling up in tears. **"I think by how much it has progressed, I would say we have a few hours before it kills the baby and then your body becomes a cesspool, killing you as well… we will have to operate as soon as possible.."**

The red-eyed demon was almost in full force. Doc knew it too, I was keeping the last of the chains on him. I was fighting a battle I had no chance of winning.

I gave into the demon completely.

"**So what your saying is that we have to kill our fucking baby? Cant you fucking fix the damn sac and fucking make it so we can have this baby?" **

*****BPOV**

I was in shock. I couldn't believe what I was hearing.

I was beyond worried now. Jasper was using profanities like he was a 5 year old eating candy.

"**I'm sorry, if there was a way I could fix this.. I would Jasper believe me." **Esme reached out to him

He moved his chair back away from her, making the metal scratch as it sled across the floor.

"**Don't you dear feed me that fucking medical school, "I would if I could" bullshit. You know damn well as I that there is something you can do other than fucking killing a baby here."**

"**I understand your frustration Jasper…"** Esme reached out to him with her arms again.

If Jasper wasn't angry it would look like they were dancing. He'd move away every time she got close.

"**Fuck you.. You don't.. don't fucking tell me you fucking understand you are trained to be assholes and under-fucking-stand." **

"**Jasper, I've lost a child myself. I know exactly what Bella is going through. Its how I guessed her condition. I've had it."**

"**Fuck this I'm not listening to you." **his face was beat red.

I couldn't get a word in. Due to Jasper's screaming and my voice still being strained from the freaking tubes.

He stood up and kicked over 2 medical trays. The first one hitting the wall to the right of me, sending metal flying everywhere, the clanging scared me.

He kicked the second towards the door.

Thank god it wasn't a glass door. He walked up to the door, kicking the tray again, to get it out of his way.

He swung the door open so hard the door's hinges creaked. Another one of those and the door would probably come clean off.

"**Jasper…." **I called to him but he didn't come back.

I began crying…

Crying for the pain I was in.

Crying for Jasper and how he was feeling…

Most of all I was crying for our baby.

Esme turned to me looking me in the eyes.. **"Bella, If there was some way I could make this work right now. Trust me, I would. I would never steer you wrong. I do love you. I'm sorry it has to be done." **consoling me again.. Like she did that night.

"**I know. Can you please get Jasper? I'd like to see if I can reason with him a little bit."**

"**Sure"** Esme walked out of the room and I sat there waiting…

Feeling completely alone.

For the first time in a long time, I felt scared and alone.


	35. Knock Knock

_**I don't own twilight or the characters.. **_

**--**

*****JPOV**

**I took off down the hall, I was pissed. The red-eyed demon had taken me over completely. I had to run, it was stupid but it was necessary.**

"**Jasper, I know your upset, please come back to the room. Bella would like to see you." **The doc called to me.

My heart broke. The demon didn't care, he was just glad to be outside from me.

I knew I had to go to her. Suck it up jackass see your girlfriend. Be fucking rational Whitlock, fight it back.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

I turned on my heel and walked back into the room. My eyes met hers. Her eyes were rimmed with tears, and they were beat red. I hated that.

I felt the Red demon fade away, back into the cage where he belonged for the rest of my life.

I gathered her into my arms. **"Jasper, I love you.. We can try again. Please, I know its painful but I trust Esme. She would never hurt me." **

Her eyes were searching for answers within my soul. **"I know she wouldn't or else she would've let you die… I'm sorry about earlier. That was immature of me… it wasn't really me. I'm sorry to the both of you" **

I took a deep breath.

"**If you both feel it's the only thing we can do, then we'll do it." **

I felt her lips press against my shoulder.

I lifted my body to kiss her forehead and her lips pressed against my neck, effectively lingering for a few seconds.

I groaned a bit. I closed my eyes, wishing the contact was longer, damn this woman, always making me crazy.

She grabbed my chin and forced my face lower to meet hers.

"**Now, no more fits until I'm out of there, you hear me?" **Her nose rubbed mine. **"Jasper Whitlock?"** She inched forwards.. **"Yes, no fits. Promise Darlin.." **I kissed her nose and then moved to her lips.

I gave her a passionate kiss that she returned. We must have been getting pretty out of control, the doc cleared her throat.

"**Okay, I've called the O.R and there is a room ready if we go now we can catch it. Jasper, I'll get you when its all over."**

I released the beautiful girl from my arms. Only to be pulled in again.

It was a chaste kiss but it was a rough one. I liked it.

"**I better get one of those when you come out darlin.." **I smirked at her, hey whatever would help my chances.

"**You can have as many as you want. I love you cowboy, see you soon.""I love you too beautiful" **

With that she was wheeled out of the room and down the hall towards the elevator.

I decided to go back to her room and wait for her.

I picked up a magazine and began looking through it, trying to keep my mind off the fact, I was losing my baby.

"**Knock, Knock!"**

My head snapped up. My face fell.

"**Wow, you are very happy to see me. I come barring coffee." **

I got up out of my seat and dragged another one over, giving her my original seat.

"**Sorry Alice, I just thought you were Esme. I'm just worried about my baby in there. I hate this.""I know, it'll be okay. Here, drink.. You could use this."**

Her hand began drawing circles on my arm.. She's too nice, trying to sooth me, while I know its hard being the sibling to the person who ruined a girls life. The same girl who was fighting for her life.

"**Thanks Alice. I know this can't be easy for you." **

"**It isn't but its okay. I'm just glad she's okay. You know, Edward isn't like that anymore. Honest. He's actually seeing someone now and is completely perfect with her. You two have nothing to fear." **She smiled at me, It was genuine but it was also pained.

"**Well, I'm happy for him." **

All of a sudden she flew at me, giving me a hug.

"**What..?" **

"**I just want you to know, if you ever need anyone to talk to.. You can come to me. I know we're sort of enemies in a way because of my brother and Isabella, but.. I want you to know, I'll be a friend to you if you ever need someone to cry to." **

I returned the hug.

"**Thanks Alice. I'll remember that"**

I felt a twinge of happiness. I let her free from my arms. Man, was she ever tiny. Wow.

"**I'll leave you be. I just got off shift but I'll be around. Hang in there Jasper." **

She smiled at me and got up to leave the room. I grabbed her hand.

"**Thanks again Alice. I appreciate it." **

She smiled and then nodded, her hair flying back and forth. She skipped out of the room and out of my sight.

What a ball of energy. Ha.

I sat down, reading the bloody magazine yet again.

I must have fell asleep. I woke to Esme shaking me. **"Jasper, it went well.. She's in recovery."**

I stood up letting Esme lead the way.**"So is she… will we be able to…"**

"**I believe so in the future. Give it about 6 months before you try again though."**I walked into the recovery room and she was like sleeping beauty, although she put her to shame.

"**Don't jump In the bed with her please. Just sit next to her, she has to be here for the next few days for observation and to make sure those stitches stay in place."**

I pulled the chair as far as it would go to her bed.

I grabbed her tiny, soft hand and sat down beside her. Leaning close to her ear, brushing away her lovely chocolate brown hair.

"**Darlin.. I'm here, we can go home in a few days. I Love you" **I kissed her ear and just sat there. Waiting… willing for her to hurry up and awake already.

I just sat there, memorizing every single inch of her beautiful face, wondering how the hell a messed up, twisted son of a gun. Ever landed a piece of heaven.


	36. Timing

_I don't own twilight or the characters.. _

_I'm hoping too Alice won't be crazy like Edward. _

_There's going to be something that comes along soon in regards to Alice. Not pretty! Thanks to everyone who keeps reading this story! _

--

"**Mm.. Jasper…."** The sweetest sound I've ever heard.

"**I'm here Darlin" **

I kissed her hand and looked up at her. Her innocent smile fell.

"**What's wrong Darlin?"**

Her hand touched my face, tracing every inch of it.

"**Your not sleeping.. And probably not eating too.. don't do this to yourself, please go eat.. I don't need you sick on me."**

Does she really think I could stomach anything while she's laying here admitted in the hospital?

"**Shh.. I'm fine honey, I've had some coffee and I'll eat when you don't have to eat through tubes okay? Don't worry, I'm fine babe." **

I kissed her forehead and sat back down. Fighting the need to jump into the bed with her.

"**How are you feeling Darlin?""I feel some pain but its bearable. I feel empty though. Its okay though, he or she is with your mother and we both know she will look after him until we can join him." **She smiled at me.

"**You have an amazing way of looking at it." **I smiled back at her and rubbed her arm.

We sat in silence just staring at each other. After this whole ordeal we just needed to memorize each others face. Eventually, we started giving each other funny faces and trying to make the other crack up laughing. We both sucked. Cracking up every 5 seconds.

Finally we both fell asleep and the doc came back around.

Bella waking me up by stroking my hair. I lifted my head up and was faced with the smiling Doc.

"**Bella you seem to be healing pretty quick. I think it will be okay to discharge you within the next 5 minutes. I need you to sign these papers. Here is some antibiotics and please, come in if you feel any sharp pains or anything outside of the norm. In about 7 to 10 days you will need to come back and get the stitches taken out.""Didn't I just get out of surgery Esme?"**

Wow, I was thinking the same thing. That's odd.**"You did about 24 hours ago. But, you seem okay to go home. You aren't exhibiting signs of infection or anything. That and both Doctor Cullen's are working in this ward later today. Since you're no longer in the danger zone I think you should go home. Its quite alright." **

She smiled at us both, kissing Bella on the cheek. The doc handed the clipboard to her and turned on her hell.

"**Just sign these and drop them off at the nurses station before you leave. I hope to see you soon Bella, outside of my profession."**

We were both happy. Bella signed the clipboard. I helped her get dressed and sat her in the wheelchair.

"**I'll hand them these papers and then we're home free.. Stay right there Darlin"**

"**Hurry back Cowboy"**

I took long strides, heading to the nurses station and dropped off the clipboard.

I took even bigger strides heading back to Bella's room. I wanted her home and home with me now, we spent too much time here.

I was about 3 feet away from the doorway of her room and I felt I felt a tiny hand grab mine.

I stopped and turned around, a tiny blur flung towards me, hitting my chest.

I caught her before she fell.

"**Whoa now"** My hands snaked around a tiny waist.

Good timing Whitlock, your about an inch from the floor.

"**Sorry about that.. You alright miss..?" **

Her face snapped into my view. Pin straight hair.

"**Jasper!"**

Her arms flew up and snaked around my neck. I stood straight up.

"**Alice.. What's wrong?"** I set her down on the ground. Her hold still around my neck, making me bend over her body.

"**I'm sorry, I'm just so happy for you."**

She jumped up and wrapped her legs around me smothering me in a hug.

Man, how hyper is she?

She began grinding her body hard against mine. I could feel everything. I mean everything. I began to tear her away from my body and she pressed her lips against mine.

What the hell is she doing?

Her tongue trying to work its way into my mouth.

She tastes good and she's really creating a lot of friction on my dick, which I know he loves.

God damn.

I involuntary groaned.

Kissing her back slightly.

Her friction was catching speed, making me groan again in excitement effectively making me even harder then I was.

God this feels so good.

Wait. What the hell am I doing?

Fuck, I have to stop this. Bella is the only person that can do this to me.

I ripped her from my body and set her down on the ground lightly.

"**Alice….." **My dick was pissed off. My Mind was pissed for another reason

"**You liked it."** her hand stroked my chest and put something in my pocket.** "See you." **she smiled and walked past me

I stood there dumbfounded. What the hell is up with me?

Get back to your girlfriend you jerk.

I know I couldn't tell her this happened. It would kill her. It's already killing me. Fuck.

I walked back into the room and my eyes met those beautiful brown eyes.

I began to feel extremely nervous… just breathe, keep your mouth shut and breathe. Nothing happened just then.

"**Hey, what's wrong?" **Its written on my face, good one Whitlock! Play it cool… just play it cool.

"**I'm just tired Darlin.. Its about time we were out of here.. "** I walked behind her and pushed her along.

"**I'm sorry. You didn't have to stay, you should've went home." **Her hand grasped mine tightly.

I wheeled us to the car in a matter of a minute. I didn't want to run into Alice. it's the last thing I wanted to deal with.

"**No, you are the woman I love so where ever you go, I follow. Don't sweat it honey. I can make up the sleep. Its you I cant turn around and get back if something were to happen. Now, brace yourself honey.." **I walked around from behind the chair to in front of her. I kissed her forehead and put my arms around her body, lifting her up and putting her in the car.

"**Thank you." **

We drove in complete silence. The only sound that was breaking our silence was the engine as it revved when picking up speed.. We got to the house and I was about to get out of the car when she stopped me.

"**I… I'm so sorry." "What are you talking about Darlin?"**

"**I'm sorry that I lost our child" **

I moved closer to her, wrapping an arm around her.**"Darlin.. It wasn't your fault. Don't think like that. We just weren't meant to be parents yet, that's all. Don't you dare beat yourself up over this. Its not your falut."**

She didn't say another word. I walked us into the house and set her in bed.

"**Do you want anything to eat, or anything at all?"**

"**No, just lay with me."**

I tore off my jeans and shirt.. And slid into bed, without moving too much to avoid hurting her.

I wrapped my arms around her and just began leaving kisses wherever I could.

"**Don't fret love.. It'll happen for us one day. Just think, now mama has a baby to take care of up there for us. You know that was one of the many things she was good at… mothering." **I smiled into her neck.

"**I know. But I still can't help but think, its my fault. If we caught it early enough, the stomach pains, we could've saved our baby" **She began crying. I couldn't have this. I felt like I was crumbling. Too much of the world was on me.

"**Honey, you didn't know. Hell, I didn't know. We dismissed it as a symptom of the food poisoning. Its not anyone's fault here. Hey, stop it. If anyone's to blame it should be me. I should've taken you to get a 2****nd**** opinion when the pains didn't stop in a few days. If you have to blame anyone, its me."**

I closed my eyes and tried to will the hurt away. It was all my fault. I didn't do anything until it was too late. I failed.

Bella hovered over me, **"Hey, open your eyes.. Look at me.." **I began getting lost in my own personal pit of despair. **"Jasper…. Open your eyes and look at me." **

I opened my eyes to the angel looking broken in front of me. **"Its not your fault. You can't know when I'm in pain, unless I tell you. Therefore its my fault. But like you said, we can try again and he or she is with their grandmother. That's a better place for them anyways."**

She took a breath and I rubbed her back. **"God just wanted their angel back. Stop feeling like this please, I love you. I promise. Once I'm healed and better We'll go to Esme and get the go ahead to do it, okay? We'll try again Jasper, I promise. I will make you a father if it's the last thing I do."**

"**Darlin, I wouldn't care if you couldn't. Right now we're both hurting and that's normal. But baby, I would never want another child if it meant I could lose you and/or the baby in the process. Its not worth it. I will never let this happen again. I love you too much to lose you." "Now, this should really hurt you… come on, roll over, lets go to sleep my silly, beautiful angel"**

I helped her off me, laying her down on her side, moving her legs underneath the covers and putting them over her.

"**I love you." **that sweet voice, ever so lovely.

"**As I love you honey. Goodnight"** I kissed her forehead and rolled onto my side of the bed.

I slept for about 3 hours, only to be woken up, for whatever reason I don't know.

I tried to relax myself but nothing was working. Not counting sheep, deep breathing nothing.. I looked beside me, thank god. Bella was sleeping peacefully. She needed sleep more than anyone.

After about 2 hours of trying to sleep, I slipped out of the bed and threw on my jeans and I headed for the bathroom. I noticed my reflection in the mirror and cursed myself. **"I need sleep. I think my brain is on meltdown.. My face looks worse." **I splashed cold water on my face.

I remembered then Alice put something in my pocket, Crap. Gotta get rid of that now. I pulled it out of my pocket and opened the small piece of paper.

_Just in case you want a little more of this. _

She left a number to reach her.

I started my way down to the kitchen and poured some orange juice, drinking it in one gulp.

I began thinking about earlier today in the hospital with Alice. How her body flung into mine, how my arms snaked around her waist and most of all how she jumped me. It felt so good. Her soft lips dancing on mine, her tongue that tasted so sweet, how her body felt grinding on mine. It felt like I was on fire. The desire between us was so strong.

I put her number into my phone, and ripped up the piece of paper.

What was I doing? Why am I being an idiot? I don't know.


	37. Foresaken

I don't own twilight or most of these characters.

Here's a somewhat Long Chapter for you guys.

More to come tomorrow! I hope!

------

I went into the living room and noticed the time, 5 am. Great, 2 hours before I have to get to work. I laid on the couch, and that's when I heard the light moans. Thank god the house was so quiet, or else I wouldn't have heard her.

I sped up the stairs like I was 5 and was racing Peter. The door to our room was still open. I went right to her side of the bed, next to her scrunched up face. **"Darlin.. You alright?"**

"**I'm just sore."**I grabbed a bottle from the nightstand -her antibiotics.

"**Here Darlin.."** I handed her the pills and stroked her cheek.**"What are you doing up honey?""I couldn't sleep, but its fine, I have to work soon. I'll call Rose when I'm there she'll come over and take care of you."**

She blushed a bit. **"You don't have to do that." "Yes I do Darlin.. Besides, you'll be lonely.."**

"**Fine, girl time would be nice. You just hurry back.""I will."**

She kissed me with such passion.

God, wasn't I riled up enough from both of these girls?

After a while, I had to pull back. **"Darlin.. I have to get ready to go to work. Please be good to me.. It'll be hard to focus.."**

***BPOV

He knows he wants to play, hell.. I do too.

I leaned in again, interlocking my fingers around his neck, kissing him again, with twice as much need.

He moaned into my mouth.

I kept up the momentum and pulled him on top of me. We both needed to connect now, more than ever. I needed him to feel that he wasn't alone in this and that I wasn't either.

He pulled away from me again, breathless but this time sucking on my collar bone.

"**I know.. It isn't fair to you, but you've got me going crazy.. So I'd like you to feel how I do." **His husk voice came out.

Damn, I missed that so much. I pushed him away. **"No, you can't. I can relieve you but I won't get the same pleasure, the doctor said no sexual contact, whatsoever." **

He groaned. **"Fine." **

I began my assault on his neck.. He instantly started growling. God, it was sexy.

My hands began tracing his stomach and back.

Just when I thought we were finally having some fun and he was getting some pleasure the alarm clock started blaring.

"**Fucking alarm." **I wrapped my arms tightly around his body. **"That was a dream Jasper, ignore it and bring your lips back to mine" **I whined.

He detached himself from my arms "**I've got to get ready to go to work darlin.. As much as I hate to go, I have to. Sorry honey."**

He got up and walked out of the room and into the bathroom. I heard the shower turn on and as quickly as it turned on, it was turned off. Within 3 minutes he had a shower and popped back out to me, in all his wet, glossy, glory.

"**How… how do you shower that quick?"**

He chuckled. **"I normally don't but cold showers make you work fast."**

He quickly dried off and threw on a white dress shirt and some dress pants.

"**Don't worry about the laundry babe, I'll do it when I get back. I'll pick up some dinner too on my way home. So you just relax and have fun with Rose. Okay?""I will don't worry."**

He walked over to me in 3 long strides. Crawling on the bed, his hand snaked around my neck and his forehead touched mine. He gazed into my eyes, with those gorgeous eyes of his. So very blue, making me all gooey inside.. **"I love you Darlin… I'll be back before you miss me"** he smirked and kissed me softly. I tried to prolong the kiss by dancing with his tongue. He pulled back. **"I love you too Cowboy and I miss you already."**

He smirked at me again. That sexy, sideways smirk, making me want to take him right then and there.

"**I'll see you tonight"** kissing my nose before pulling away.

He quickly got out of the bed and walked out of the room.

I rolled over trying to sleep again. I really do love him and I cannot wait to have kids.

Especially ones that will look exactly like him.

***JPOV

I took off down the stairs, grabbing my keys and a coat before running outside. In my rush, I didn't realize that there was ice. I slipped down the stairs hitting my back.

Great! Just Great! When did it rain and freeze? Fuck.

I picked myself up, brushing off my pants making a mental note to pick up some road salt on my way home tonight. Also, call Rose not Charlotte. If I can fall without being pregnant, then she will fall for sure.

I hopped in my truck and took my time to work. If my porch could make me slip and fall on my back so easily the roads have to be worse, yeah the only road that wasn't bad was the one to my office. I made it to work, no Jessica, not even Peter. I ended up being the first person there. The office was dark, everyone has to be late because of the weather. I went into my office and that's when my Dick started talking again.

Oh just shut up already Damn it!

***BPOV

I tossed and turned for a few hours. It was now 11am. Rosalie hadn't shown up. I began to get worried. I picked up my phone from the nightstand and called her.

"**Hey Izz Good morning! Your home now?""Yeah, I was wondering where you were"**

"**Oh dear. I'm out at the ranch. My car won't start. Major is boosting it for me.""Has Jasper called you?""No, what's wrong honey?""Oh nothing. He said he would call you to come over here and spend the day with me.""Oh. Well, I'd love to come over if you still want me to.""Of course I do! Send my love to everyone there." **

"**Dollface says hello…." **a gruff voice In the background greeted me **"Tell that lovely doll to come see me when she's all better.." **Rosalie's laughter started drifting into the phone "**Hear that? I'll be over as soon as I can! See you soon!"**

"**I did. Thanks." **I smiled. Rosalie and Pete Sr. really made my day.

I decided to get out of bed. Ouch. Still hurt a little but it wasn't too bad.

I jumped into the shower, it still smelt like him. Mmm. I loved the smell of him. I decided to suck it up and use my body wash, effectively erasing the scent of Jasper from the bathroom and replacing it with my own.

I washed my hair, being careful not to drop anything since it hurts a bit to bend my body over.

I heard Rosalie pull up. Damn it. I spent a good hour in the shower.

I got out and dried my body off.. Heard the knocking on the door and just found comfy track pants and a shirt of Jasper's to wear.

I threw up my wet hair and made my way down the stairs.

"**Hi Rose!"** I gave her a big hug.**"Hey Izz… good morning."**

"**Have you eaten yet? I haven't.""Oh dear god no, I just fed the Major and Charlotte. She's due any day now. Soon as you called me I rushed right over honey.""Great, that'll be the first thing we do."**

She laughed as she shrugged off her coat and walked into the kitchen with me.

"**So are you alright?" **She pulled out the eggs and some milk.

"**Yeah, I'm great."**

"**I know this has to be tough on you. I won't press you about it, just know you can talk to me if you need to."** She smiled at me and turned her back, beginning to make our eggs.

"**I know. I just feel like I've failed as a mother, when I haven't even become one yet."** I took a seat at the end of the island and Rosalie turned around.

"**You haven't failed. It just wasn't the right time. Don't blame yourself Swan."**

"**I know, I just… I feel badly"**

I looked away from her. **"Of course you do. Have you ever thought this was just suppose to make you and Jasper become even stronger.. To make your relationship better? I know you're both suffering but at the end of the day, after everything that's happened up until now.. You both have needed something to make you both stronger."**

I flipped on the radio and began making toast. **"****You know… Your right."**

We both hummed along to the music, dancing as we went. Today was going to be a good day, I'm so glad Rosalie came.

***JPOV

I signed a few papers, called some men to do some work outside of the city limits. I didn't want to look at work today.

I decided to leave the office, I wasn't going to get much done anyways.

I got in my truck and started driving, I drove until I hit a familiar highway, might as well visit my Dad and my sister-in-law to be.

I took out my phone and dialled a number

"**Hello?"**

"**Hey, Roz. I'm sorry its last minute but do you mind if you can go to my place and be with Bella today?"**She laughed. **"Whitlock, I'm already here. She called about 2 hours ago. Where has your mind been?"**

I began mentally cursing myself, how could I forget?**"Obviously isn't switched on today. Thanks Roz. Love you and her. I'm headed to the Major's, I'll be back later."**

She laughed at my comment. **"Okay fine. She loves you too. Bye."**

I drove pretty fast, the weather sucked. No one was even on the road. Thank god, I was going 150 clicks. Not safe on a road like this, who cares really? I arrived in no time, I finally skidded out when I was parking my truck, right into the snow bank. Ha! It finally happens when I park.

I jumped out, not caring about fixing my parking job and ran inside, almost losing my footing at the door. What is wrong with me today?

I took off my shoes and coat and smelt cinnamon immediately. Mmmmmmmm.

"**Hey Char, making those famous buns?"** I walked down the long corridor and making a left at the kitchen.

"**Jasper, oh myyy!"** She flung herself to me, hugging me instantly, she kissed me and then stepped back. **"How is Bella? Is she okay? How are you holding up?"**

I held my hand up, motioning for her to stop. **"Better question is, how are you and the major doing?" **

"**We're fine, you overbearing fool"** She laughed. **"Now, how are the two of you doing?""Well, we lost the baby, but she's home and safe with Rose, I was suppose to be at work today but I couldn't focus I had to come see how my lovely sister and make sure my dad wasn't being a hard ass on you." **

She laughed again **"Why, he's never a hard ass to me. He's just hard on you- you're the one he feels the need to still toughen up. You know that."**

"**Yeah, yeah." **I laughed and made my way to the tray of warm buns.

"**Mister Whitlock, none of that here" **She slapped my hand with a wooden spoon.

"**Devil Woman!"** I chuckled as I shook a fist at her.

"**Yes, Listen to Charlotte son. Before she gets upset and has us both running for the hills."**

Looking up, I met my father's face, his blue-green eyes glossed over and his mouth slightly turned up at the corners. Wearing his classic white shirt and blue jeans, with his brown cowboy hat, with some worn out patches, from years wearing it outside working on the land and his worn brown boots.

"**Son…" **he tipped his hat to me, moving further from the doorway and into the kitchen. I counted his steps in my mind, hoping to god I didn't piss him off today.

"**Major" **I bowed my head, taking a step forward **"How are you this morning?"**

He wrapped an arm around me, squeezing the life out of me, slapping my back. I began to do the same

"**You know, still fighting the war. I feel great now that you've come to visit." **

"**I know we haven't been by in some time Father. I'll be sure to bring Bella by when she is better.""You better. So she's fine at home alone? Without you?"** he raised an eyebrow

"**Roz is there with her, she needs a girl there more now than me so, I came here."** I shrugged my shoulders.**"Ya'know" **Charlotte chimed in**, "I could've gone today Jasper."** She sounded heartbroken.**"No.. Charlotte. I nearly killed myself leaving the house this morning and I'm not going to risk the next Whitlock boy, especially when his father is my brother." **I kissed her cheek.

Father put his arm around her, pulling her to him and brushed some of her hair out of her face, **"The boy has a point my dear. Now please honey, go have a seat, you've been on hot coals running around since Roz left. Go and rest, let dear old papa handle this." **It was a nice tender moment. He was always a rough, tough, bad attitude, step out of line and you'll get it type. I guess being a grandfather was changing him.**"Oh fine fine" **She tore off her apron **"you Whitlock men are so stubborn, not letting a woman do anything…"** she began to walk out of the room. **"Please take some home to Bella."**

"**I will." **she kissed both of our cheeks and walked out of the room.

The major took off his hat, revealing the blond hair with red strands running through it.

"**Still battling the blond and red hair? You know you could dye it and be done with it." **I laughed

"**So, my dear Jacqueline has a child to look after now?"** why was he changing the subject. I didn't want to think about this right now.

"**Yes."** I looked down towards the floor. Trying to will some of the pain away. I cannot think about this now. I have to be strong for Bella.

"**Will you promise me something?" **I looked up meeting his eyes. **"****I know that we have had our differences but please promise me you'll let Bella make an honest, good man out of you and get married, have a lot of children. Don't let yourself become me."** his hand touched my shoulder.

I took a step forward **"Major, I'm so much like you, more than you could even imagine."**

He removed his hand, making it into a fist and slamming it into the table behind me. I jumped, out of fear. He always instilled much more fear in me than love.

"**No, that you aren't. You are so full of your darling mother you just can't see it past your stupid demons. It is Peter who is most like me. Except he's got your mother's love in him that out-shines anything he ever got from me." **He took a deep breath **"Don't ever let yourself slip to that dark place within your soul. I know I brought that out in you but I'm warning you boy.."** he waived his finger in front of my face, I began to sweat, wondering what I have said and if it would involve punishing me.

"**For fuck sakes I know. Why are you being like this?" **There was rage in his eyes if eyes could change color they would be as red as the red strands that ran through his blond hair.**"I see it in your eyes, your thinking what you shouldn't be. Remember what happened with Tanya."**My blood started boiling.** "Shut up!" **

I raised my voice even louder this time **"Don't you dare say her name. That was forsaken long ago!" **My voice began to quiver. I knew what was coming, I tried to brace myself. I spoke out of turn and you never do that, not in his house.

"**I will not." **His rage was flaming through those blue-green eyes of his. I could see the red spilling through. **"You know what I have said is the truth. You need to come to terms with this boy…" **I knew what was happening, his own red eyed demon was breaking through its own cage, except mama being the ice that put him out wasn't here.

I shouted, speaking out of turn again. **"I have. Why else would I have allowed myself to fall in love again? Some fucking father you are." **Might as well keep going, I already know what I'm in 's when I felt it. His fist connected with my face instantly. I stood there and took it, controlling my demon within me.

I had to tell him, **"You know what" **I had an harsh tone. Not smart but I didn't care. _**"Major"**_ I couldn't even call him Dad or Father, how harsh is that as a kid. **"You.."**

I shoved my finger in his chest **"You are the reason I battle this red eyed demon every fucking day. You can't even see you unleashed something even worse inside of me, thanks to you. I'm exactly like you. That's why I hate you that's why we always fight. I was too weak to stand up to you, guess what DADDY? This ends now." **I felt the heat in my body, it was flowing through my veins.

My father for once, took a step back. He was Scared of me? The son he pushed around and beat daily?

I was bold, I took 2 steps forward, looking him dead in the eye.

"**You tell me to deal with my demon. Let's give Jasper a whole bunch of medication, let's slowly kill his mother, oh and for good measure we'll beat his fucking ass every fucking night for stupid shit." **

"**I never killed your mother." **Tears in his eyes were threatening to spill over.

Fuck that was a low blow and I knew it, although, the heat felt so good through me, I couldn't stop this even if I tried. Fuck, where was Peter or Bella? I can't stop this on my own.

"**You were slowly killing her by hurting me. She always tried to stop you, you never heard her at night, after every strike I took from you, she would always cry over and over again. When you would leave.. Who was fucking picking her up, putting her back together like humpty dumpty huh?"** I took another step forward. "**You'd break me physically but you killed the mother I had. You broke her heart." **I was mere centimetres from his face. "**You heartless piece of shit. Anything bad I do in my life, is because of you. You did this. You made me this stupid temperamental asshole. I am the person that Mama didn't want me to become."**

He didn't say a damn thing.

"**From now on, You don't fucking strike me. I'm no longer that 5 year old who you can strike whenever I speak out of turn. You fucking keep your hands off me and my brother."**

I stepped back from him. **"There is no way I'll be free of this thing now but I will make sure the red demon will never spill over like yours. Never again."**

"**I'm now going to be with my sunrise. She needs me more than ever. As for you, you no longer haunt me and I will no longer let your faults ruin me."**

I walked out of the kitchen, not wanting to see his face. I hurt him pretty bad. Did I have to say most of it? Probably not, but it always ate at me. I'm glad its out in the open now.

I was near the door putting my shoes on. Upon straightening myself out and grabbing for my coat when Charlotte jumped me, yet again.

"**Oh Sugar. I love you hon. Please, please.. Don't leave like this."**I hugged her as tight as I could, minding her huge baby belly. **"I love you too sweetheart. I'm so sorry. I didn't come here with these intentions. I have to go. I should've been with Bella today. I'm sorry. I Love you."** Tears were pouring down her face like rain drops running across my windshield. I kissed both her cheeks and then her forehead.

"**Don't be so hard on yourself. This is all on me and the Major. Okay? I Love you. Please, don't freak out." **

Her emotions were haywire. **"But Jas.."** I put a finger to her lips.

"**Don't Char. You just relax. You need to take care of my nephew in there." **I rubbed her belly **"I'll call Bella and Pete from the road. Its okay…you have my word."**

My Father materialized from the kitchen and grabbed Charlotte's hand. **"Pumpkin, let him go. Its fine. How about we go dance or watch a movie. Come on honey." **

"**Listen to him. I'm fine." **I kissed her again. **"I Love you. I'll call you when I get home, Promise."**I turned on my heel walking out of the house. Charlotte had every reason to beg me to stay. I don't blame her, last time shit like this went down.. I found myself in disrepair.

This cannot go on any longer. I've got to tell Bella exactly what is going on, she deserves to know and I've been an asshole holding back on her.

She's my everything and she deserves to know everything.

I got into my truck and drove away from the house and farm that was once my home.


	38. Time Has Come

_***I don't own twilight or these characters.***_

_**Enjoy and review!--**_

_*****BPOV**_

_**Me and Rose watched movies all day. We watched the notebook, Alpha dog, Sleepy Hollow and 300. We finally sat there, staring at each other when Rose broke the silence. **_

"_**I'm so glad you called me. We haven't had a girls day in forever." "I know, I'm so happy" **__I smiled, it actually hurt to smile that big, but I couldn't help it. I was so damn happy._

"_**I really don't want to leave, but soon as Jasper gets back here I need to tend to Emmett. He's probably hungry, wondering what happened to me." **__she got up off the couch and walked into the foyer, looking into the mirror and fixing her hair. _

"_**Can't you stay? I'll tell him I've kidnapped you and your mine now." **__I shook a mock fist at laughed, throwing her head back, __**"Yeah watch how fast he comes over here and breaks down your door. He did it to Jasper's Dad. It was funny. He kicked in the door at the ranch and you should've seen how fast he ran back out, the Major chased him with an unloaded shotgun. Chased him so far he stopped for a cigarette before Emmett realized that if the Major was going to shoot him, he would've done it from the porch."**_

_I laughed, __**"That sounds like Emmett alright." **_

"_**Should I start on dinner? That way when Jasper gets back, he doesn't have to do anything." **__Oh Rosalie._

"_**No. He said he would pick something up for dinner so don't worry."**__ I smiled at her.._

_Just then we both jumped at the sound of a car door slamming shut. __**"What the hell? If that's Emmett. He's dead."**__ We both laughed while she went to open the door._

_I heard the door open, I heard the wind blow outside clearly from the opened door. I heard heavy footsteps approaching the door. Yup, Emmett._

"_**Yes, I'm here. Not a scratch. Calm down. Do I have to call Peter?"**__ That voice made my heart skip a beat. __**"Yes…. Yes….Hang on." **__My heart kept accelerating, my breathing hitched and my body started shaking, like I was about to do a presentation in front of a class or something. Except, I loved this feeling._

"_**There you are"**__ I got up off the couch, and started towards the door quickly. Trying to relieve the sensations through my body. His head was titled down, I stopped just in the nick of time but he took a couple steps forward, it completely caught me off guard, making me fall over in the process._

"_**Fuck, Honey"**__ his cold hands snaked around my waist, I heard things hitting the floor. I knew he dropped his keys, they scattered as he lifted me off the ground, slightly running across the room trying to keep his balance._

"_**Watch it Jasper, your going to send Bella into the hospital again."**__ Rose began picking up the things he dropped, trying to make the house less of a death trap for me._

_His cheeks were beet red and his blue eyes were pools of water, on the verge of tears. Probably from how cold it was outside. His eyes were running all over my face and his cold hands pressed my body up against his warm body hidden underneath his black coat. I closed my eyes when my forehead met his neck, breathing deeply, those sensations faded away, bringing on the butterflies and happiness that fills every fibre of my being when he's around. I found my hands running up his chest from his belt buckle to his neck._

"_**Darlin.. " **__his cold hands met my shoulders, pulling me away from him, my hands grabbed onto his blue sweater, tightly holding him. Tears were forming, I missed him too much. __**"Hey, you alright?" **__I could smell his breath. It smelt of grapefruit and mint. He'd been smoking.. I frowned. _

"_**I'm fine, you've been smoking."**__ his hand brushed my cheek. Gah! I jumped backwards. He chuckled. __**"Your hand is so cold" **__He raised his hands as if to be admitting defeat. __**"Excuse me a sec darlin, I've got a freaked out Charlotte on the phone." **__he turned on his heel to just bump into Rosalie. He caught her, lifting her off the ground and spun her around._

"_**You damn women need to stop this, before I kill one of you." **_

_We both laughed at him. __**"Phone Roz!" **__he walked over to the couch and threw her down, she gave up the phone instantly. _

"_**What's got Charlotte freaked out? Its not the baby is it?"**__ I thought about how Charlotte was all alone at the ranch with the Major._

"_**It's….. well… its uh, something you and I need to talk about honey. Give me 5 minutes and I'm yours." **__he turned on his heel and walked out of the room. _

_What the hell was that about?_

_Rose got up, with a sad look on her face, she looked up at me, replacing the sad look with a smile and walked over to give me a hug. __**"Don't worry, if anything give me a call. I'll bring Emmett over when you're better!" **__I nodded and she headed towards the door. __**"Bye Jazz.. Calling you in a few days!" **__she yelled as the door shut behind her._

_I laid down on the couch, with a pillow behind my head, I closed my eyes. I began reflecting back on the last few days. It really did hurt, but, its how life is. I've had to learn the hard way to deal with upsetting things. I can't let it get me down. If I do, I'm that stupid 17 year old again._

_I'm allowed to cry and have moments to be sad but I won't let this take over my whole life._

_I really do wonder if our baby was a girl or boy. Definitely, they would have Jasper's blond hair and blue eyes, be funny and sensitive like him. If I had it my way, they wouldn't inherit anything from me but if they did, they would be clumsy like me, love books and be completely willing to throw themselves into something they strongly believed._

_My Example? The Blond, blue eyed angel that is in my life. Making me a happier, better woman. I will never regret falling so blindly and so fast for this man._

_I felt a blanket drape over my body. I smelt a slight hint of cinnamon, tearing me out of my thoughts, my eyes snapped open. I was met with a surprised face. __**"I'm sorry. I thought you were sleeping, rather than wake you…" **_

_I shook my head. __**"Its fine. I was just thinking, waiting for you."**_

_His slight frown turned upside down into a sly smile. __**"Honey, you didn't have to wait, I can leave you to your thoughts."**__ he got off his knees and I grabbed his hand and yanked him towards me before he was able to get too far from me._

_His other hand shot out to the couch. __**"Careful"**__ chastising me. I started to get up, with his assistance, I sat up, he sat down, draping my legs over his lap. He began rubbing my legs, using a slow, up and down motion. His face tensed up. This wasn't good._

_I was about to say something when he started talking._

"_**I haven't been completely honest to you Bella." **__titling his head towards mine_

"_**Wha…What are you talking about?"**__ Not honest? You? _

_He Sighed __**"I guess I should start at the beginning, before I met you and then shortly after." **_

"_**Okay?"**__ I was confused._

"_**Bare with me. This gets hard for me." **_

_He sighed again. He ran a hand through his tussled blond hair, tugging slightly at the end. Uh Oh. He's really nervous._

"_**I know I've told you about my parents..."**_

_He took a breath. __**"Its no secret, I've been abused you've seen my scars on my back.. I don't hide it. I'd like to start about when I was five This time was the first time. I was in the yard, playing in my little sandbox, I had a toy horse, as brown as your hair, I called him Murphy"**__ He laughed slightly. __**"Anyways, me and Murphy were rounding up the bad Ants. And putting them in jail.. Jail was in the back of my fire truck and from the fire truck into a bucket of water. I didn't even know I had been outside all afternoon when The major came home." **_

_He brought a hand to his throat and tugged at his sweater. _

"_**Turns out my toy horse Murphy, wasn't suppose to be outside, and I was sunburnt. My Father took one look at me and snapped like a twig.. I uh, I was dragged into the house, the scorching hot pavement scratching at my skin, as he walked across the lawn and brought me into the house…. The next thing I remember is my mama stroking my hair, singing to me, just making up a song trying to get me to stop crying.." **_

_He paused. Maybe he was editing out parts for my sake or maybe he didn't remember._

"_**They were more frequent. He always struck me, for whatever reason. If I spoke out of turn, if he took something the wrong way. I learned respect too damn early in life. That also leaded to my own personal demon."**__He grabbed one of my hands, squeezing it lightly._

"_**You have seen my temper… but you don't know the extent of it."**_

_His breathing started becoming irregular and he closed his eyes. I took it upon myself to sit in front of him and wrap my arms around him. The pain in me, stung. I moved too quickly, ignoring it I squeezed his body tightly into mine, Jasper groaned at how tight I was squeezing him. __**"Sorry. Continue." **__I kissed his nose and released my hold on him._

_He put his arms around me, taking another deep breathe. __**"When I was about 18, my girlfriend at the time, Tanya, was staying over at my house for the weekend, we had a huge science exam we were trying to cram all weekend until the Major wanted to bring out his red eyed demon to play with me. I really got into it with the Major. He kicked my door in, I stood in front of Tanya, he waltzed into my room and grabbed me by the shoulder, ripping me out of the room. I was dragged down the stairs, now being taller, he couldn't drag me across the ground. We made it outside and he threw me with force on the ground. I got up and shoved him back."**__ He Paused again. _

"_**I'm sorry, I'm trying to recall this. I've buried it for some time." **_

_I began to wonder about Tanya, how beautiful she must've been, how amazing she would've been to fit with Jasper. He sighed. __**"We went after each other for a while, Peter finally came running out of the house with Tanya behind him. He had to rip us apart like we were dogs fighting. Naturally, He had to pin me and Tanya got close enough to me that the Major wouldn't strike me with her so close to me. I remember getting up, looking in her eyes, she was so afraid. I decided to take her home and stay at her place. It was better that way..""We packed our stuff and left. I was more than likely covered in bruises. My mood was even worse. I couldn't believe he just attacked me like that when Tanya was there. Anyways, we left. The way it was…. Was that Tanya lived on the other side of town. The Ranch is outside of it on the west end and she was on the far east end. I began driving, trying to console Tanya, show her there was nothing broken and that I was fine. I was still angry. I let my own demon seep through, we were a mere 5 minutes from her house when it happened."**__He looked in my eyes, breathing deeply. __**"It's okay, if its too hard then we can talk about this another time."**_

_He shook his head at me. _

"_**I was…fighting the battle with my temper, Tanya was on the phone with Charlotte letting her know we were fine and how we were almost home."**_

"_**I… must have not been paying attention… Tanya screamed, a truck driver was drifting on our side of the road, I swerved to miss the damn thing, turning into the opposite lane when the driver of the truck decided to be stupid and pull back into his lane, the lane I was driving in. I hit the brakes, trying to turn the car away from the truck but he was coming in pretty fast…Tanya grabbed my shoulder.. I yelled at her. My rage and fear spilling out with my temper. She said she loved me and began praying.."**_

_His eyes were now closed. His breathing was irregular.__**"We hit the truck head on. I was flung out of the car. I could hear Tanya Screaming. I could barely breathe. She… she kept saying my name over and over again." **__He took another deep breath. __**"I busted my ankle and my knee, that I was aware of. I physically dragged myself to the car, trying to free her. The car had rolled, part of the truck fell on it, the passenger side was on the ground. My rage took over and I somehow, got her out of the car, I don't remember that part, it's a blur. After I got her out of the car, I called 911 and we sat on the side of the road, waiting for help. She kept telling me she loved me and kept saying the lords prayer over and over again."**_

"_**I'm pretty sure her last conscious moments were with me because they couldn't wake her up after that. She was on breathing machines and the like later on. She passed away on a Thursday. Our 3 year anniversary."**_

"_**I'm so sorry Jasper." **__I clung to him tightly, rubbing his back and breathing in his scent to keep me from being hysterical._

"_**I didn't mean to tell you that story but it explains how hysterical Charlotte was on the phone with me. I got into a fight with my dad. He punched me once and I punched him with my words. I was beyond Pissed off until I crashed into you here. See, Tanya was Charlotte's sister. That night, I was as angry as I was today."**_

_I gasped. Her Sister? He got into a fight with his father?__**"Why would you fight with your dad?"**__I was met with his smouldering blue eyes again __**"Well, two men that have raging tempers and already have a sense of hate.. It just happens.""But, you guys are always good when I'm around."**__He shook his head. __**"You Darlin… are like the ice that smothers the fire raging within me. As for Father, he tries not to pick fights when there are women around. My Mama was his ice.."**_

"_**Anyways, my temper got worse, the major really got on me for the car and what happened. Mama tried everything she could to keep his demon at bay but she couldn't always protect me. It actually made it worse. He hated that she loved me more than him. There was one night, before she got real sick… she flung herself in my way, it was the first time Father ever struck her. Peter couldn't even hold me back. I really fucked him up. Its way he's so sick now. I beat the living hell out of him that his heart couldn't take the rage his body was feeling for me hitting him and for the remorse and rage he felt inside himself for sticking the one woman he loved.""That leads us to after that incident. I had to go to therapy and take a bunch of pills to control this thing inside me. I stopped taking them about 2 years before I met you." **__He kissed my forehead. __**"The first person to meet my rage was that scum" **__He didn't even have to say his name, I knew. __**"And, then.. You.. After that I knew, I couldn't do this anymore, fighting on my own wasn't cutting it. I started back on some medication, except I got the strong still in the drug testing stage ones. Remember when you thought I was cheating on you?"**_

"_**Yeah I do. You passed out and scared the living hell out of me.""Yeah, it was because of those pills and stress at work. I wasn't taking care of myself. I actually stopped taking the dose I should be taking since then. Except for the other night at the hospital, turns out they don't work either.""So you took pills because of me? You shouldn't get dependent on them"**__ I began to panic. My stupid life is making him turn to drugs._

"_**It was necessary. I didn't want you to be the victim of my rage ever again. I never wanted you to be the victim in the beginning before that, never ever do I want you to hurt or anything bad because of me honey."**_

"_**You said I'm your ice right?""Yes honey, that you are.""Then how about, we just don't part. We seem to cause less when we're together than we ever do apart. Besides, I hate being apart."**__His smile spread from ear to ear. __**"Darlin… your reading the exact thought I have every waking moment when I have to be away from you." **_

_His smile fell, and his forehead creased. __**"I have to tell you this." **__His blue eyes looked too emotional for my Jasper. He sighed, "__**At the hospital.. When I was dropping off your discharge papers.." **__he took a breath. "..__**Alice Cullen, jumped me.""Jumped you?"**__ What..the.. Hell?_

"_**She jumped up on me, wrapped her legs around my waist, began kissing me and grinding on my body. She caught me off guard and I kissed her back slightly"**__He kissed her back? What? I felt very jealous and angry._

"_**I ripped her from my body and she walked off. I don't know why or how, but honestly, that's all that happened."**_

"_**You kissed her back? How could you do that?"**__ I snapped at him._

"_**I don't know, I got lost in it. I don't even understand it myself."**__ he began pulling at his hair again.._

"_**Yeah, well.. Until you do understand, you aren't sleeping with me." **__I got up from the couch and began walking up the stairs. Jasper didn't bother following me, which was a good thing. _

_I walked into our bedroom and locked the door, before hopping in bed and sleeping on His side of the bed._


	39. Coffee & Teddy

I don't own twilight or these characters. I will try and update soon. J

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**JPOV

Did I really just get put in the dog house? I'm an idiot. I knew it was wrong but I let my dick do the thinking. I couldn't just not tell her either.

If anything, I had balls… well.. I have balls but… I really had them there telling her that I kissed Alice. It's not like it meant anything. If It did, I'd be calling her up and I'd be having my way with her, instead of laying down on this stupid fucking couch.

I picked up my cell, going through my contacts, I found Alice's number, effectively deleting it. I don't even know why I put her number into my phone. Now, there is no way I will let a stupid pixie bitch do this to us.

I have to make this up to her.

I tossed and turned all night. The look on her face before she left me for the night, really haunted me. She looked so hurt, so betrayed. All because of me. I should've been a better man.

Also, my past was creeping into my mind. The way Tanya looked at me with terror filled eyes, how she was telling me she loved me while some blood was trailing out of her mouth, her blue eyes were glistening, she was in a lot of pain and there was nothing I could do.

Next thing I knew, she was gone. I didn't even care about my own injuries.

Mama was so broken and hurt. Not once did she blame me, not ever. Just always said, god needed her back and I shouldn't beat myself up over this, Tanya wouldn't have wanted it. Except, she died 3 months later, a few days shy of my birthday and all that shit went out of the window.

Nothing ever made sense after that, I was just going through the motions, not even realizing where the time went and that I was wasting my life until Bella came along.

I didn't sleep a wink and now it was time to get ready for work. I actually had to go seeing as though Peter was with Charlotte. She had a ton of appointments today.

I peeled myself off the couch and walked upstairs. Hoping I could make up before I headed to work. I put my hand on the door knob, yup still locked. I just hope she slept more than I did.

I turned around and headed downstairs, to use the shower down there, I wasn't about to wake her up.

I jumped in the shower, trying to will away my tense muscles. I really need to sleep. Hell, I really just wanted to sleep next to my girl. Thanks to be being an ass, that wont happen. I got out drying myself and looked in the mirror. Wow, purple bruises that are turning black underneath my eyes, I had a slight bruise on my face from the major's fist but that's fine. Lastly, I really needed to shave. I was on the verge of stubble turning into a gruff looking beard. Oh well, no time for this now.

I went into the laundry room. Thank god Rosalie did the laundry yesterday, or else I'd have to try and get into that room to get something to wear. I pulled on some clothes that made me look professional enough, rather than the bum I felt and looked at the moment. I tied my hair back and scrawled a note for the sleeping beauty upstairs.

I put it on the counter where she always sets her coffee mug when she gets up, frowning.. I turned on my hell, heading towards the door, putting on my coat, gloves, shoes and hat on. Grabbing my keys I opened the door, holy fuck is it ever cold!

I booked it to my truck, hopping inside and turning the key instantly, the engine sputtered, not allowing me to start it for the life of me.

"**Fuck!" **I hit the steering wheel. This is just what I needed. I turned the keys again, hoping that it would start.

Click, click, click, click… fuck!

This is the last thing I need right now.

I hit my steering wheel again, hitting it quite a few times. Damn it! I didn't need this today, on top of feeling so down for hurting the one I love, over some stupid pixie bitch I'm not even into whatsoever. This truck has to fucking start.

I turned the key again,

Click, click, click, click.

Fuck. This is not going to be a good day, not that it started off good anyways.

I pulled out my phone, calling my trusty friend. Roz.

After I told her what happened last night and her screaming and telling me I was marked for death by her hands, then handing the phone to Emmett saying I was dead too, she laughed and agreed to come boost me.

A few minutes later, she showed up with Emmett. I popped the hood and we began working on my dead car. Emmett was no where to be found. I guess he was inside, being a better man to my girl than I could ever be.

I felt lower then dirt.

"**I can't believe you kissed Alice. You are truly one stupid guy."** Rosalie said while pulling out my battery. **"Well, your battery is toast.""I can't believe I did it either, I don't know what came over me. Trust me, if I could replay that moment, I wouldn't have done it. I was just thinking with my dick then my actual brain.""Whitlock.. When have you ever thought with your brain? It's either your dick, your medication or that demon you try so hard to keep locked away that always spills out without warning. Trust me honey, you've never used your head."**

"**I know. So how do I fix this? I'm at a loss." "Honey, I'm not sure. Izzy isn't like most women. You are just going to have to apologize profusely, gain her trust back and hope and pray she comes around rather then pack her shit and leave your ass."**

"**She wouldn't leave me."**

"**We're going to have to get another battery, get in." **

I walked over to their car and got in, Roz went into my house, and then popped back out.

"**I was telling Emmett where we were, just in case he came out and we were gone."**

***EMPOV

I walked inside, I headed to the kitchen and made some coffee. Why are we always woken up so early. These Whitlock boys, Charlotte and Rosie are glad I love them so damn much.

I took the two mugs upstairs and I heard Izz Sobbing, it subsided when she heard me getting closer to the door. Why does she hide this? It tears me apart.

I knocked on the door. Nothing.

"**Tinks. Its me, Emmett.. Open the door please. I swear its just me. Please open the door."**

Still nothing.

"**I have good news for you. I'll stand out here until you open the door!" **I laughed. Not good news for her, but for me, I'm not leaving her like this. I'll just annoy her enough to the point she'll have to come out and hit me.

I heard the door downstairs open, I popped my head over the railing, it was my beautiful Rosie.

"**We're getting a new battery. Good luck, love you."** she whispered.

"**Love you too" **she blew me a kiss and then she was gone.

I knocked on Bella's door again, **"Tinkerbells" **I knocked again, **"Tinks, Coffee" **I keept knocking over and over again, the door swung open.

"**You couldn't give me 5 minutes to wash my face or brush my teeth?"** Her voice was raspy.

"**Sorry Tinkerbells. That's why I'm the annoying big brother." **I walked into the room, setting the coffee down on the nightstand. I turned around and picked her tiny frame off the floor.

I missed this girl. So much. I pulled her into my lap and just held her. Her face was very pale, her eyes were bloodshot and she had heavy bags under her eyes. Wow, she looks like Jasper, except I don't know who looks worse.

"**Why are you here? You shouldn't have come"** she began crying a bit.

"**Well, first your stupid excuse of a man had problems with his truck. He told us what happened and after wishing death upon him, we had to come over. I had to make sure you were okay, on behalf of Rosie as well."**

"**Now, tell your big brother what's wrong."**

"**I don't… I don't understand what he did. He told me about his past, then told me about Alice jumping him… what I don't understand is, he kissed her back and didn't care about me..**

She got up, sitting back behind me crying, I turned around to face her and she was rocking back and forth, crying even harder.**"Its like I'm just the girl.. he sleeps with.. is just around until he's sick of me" **she got out between sobs.

I immediately jumped on her. **"Oh shit, I didn't hurt you did I?" **she shook her head and crushed herself to me, I gave her the biggest and hardest hug I could without killing her.

"**Tinks. Jasper loves you whole heartily. That, I can tell you without a doubt. I haven't seen the sparkle in his eyes since Jackie died. You've brought him back to life. He actually cares about living and people again, thanks to you."**

"**I know he was an asshole and he shouldn't have done that. I know you wont let him back in so quickly. Think like Rosie." **She laughed.

"**I'm serious. Forgive, but not so easily. Make him work for it and your trust again. You need him as much as he needs you. I can tell you, you both look so horrible today, I don't know who takes home the trophy."**

She sat up, untangling us, taking a sip of her coffee. **"Mmm. Thanks Teddy"** I smiled. **"Your welcome. Oh yeah, here you go. I found this in the kitchen. I didn't read it, just noticed it was to you. Thought I would bring it to you."**

**BPOV

I felt so hurt and betrayed. Not only did he kiss another woman while I just get released from the hospital. He kisses Alice? My bitter enemy? Its no secret we hate each other now. I have my reasons. Obviously.

I'm so glad Emmett came to see me, he's like my sunshine. I don't know how I coped without him. I really miss him when he's not around.

I flipped the note open and scanned it.

Very messy scrawl, wow.

_Darlin,_

_I'm so sorry I hurt you. I tried to see you this morning but the door was locked and I didn't have the heart to wake you. If you are still upset with me, fine.. But I just thought I would leave this so you don't get angry that I didn't kiss you before I went to work. If you want, we can work this all out tonight, Peter and Charlotte will be in town so if you want to see the baby I've left Charlottes new number below. _

_I Love you, a million times I love you._

_Jazz_

I tore it in half and threw it across the room. How dare he? Saying sorry in writing? Has he effectively lost his mind?

"**Hey Tinks.. What was with that?" **Freaking Emmett and his raised eyebrows

"**He had the decency to apologize in a note. And that doesn't fly with me." **

"**Oh.. That doesn't sound like him, maybe he's desperate to show you or something." **

"**Yeah, that's real desperate alright"** I rolled my eyes

"**Hey, don't be so sarcastic with me little one.""Sorry Emmett. You are right though, I shouldn't forgive so easily. I'll make him work for it. Frankly, I'm sick of sitting here crying feeling awful. He's the one who should, I didn't do anything wrong so fuck him. He will NOT walk all over me." **

Emmett started jumping on the bed, then lifted me off the bed and threw me in the air.

"**Um.. You know Teddy is going to kill Tinkerbells.. You better let her down before she has to go to the emergency room again"**He set me down and cleared his throat. **"Sorry"** His face was very serious, all happiness and that goofy smile of his wiped off his face.

I doubled over in laughter and Rose came through the door.

"**Izz.. You okay?" **her face told me she was concerned

"**I'm okay, Thanks to Emmett."** he pulled me into another hug and I smiled.

"**That's good. I'm sorry to leave you alone but, we both have to get home and get ready for work, now.. Before we get fired for being late." **

"**Shit, Sorry tinkerbells. Call us okay? If anything, call us"** Emmett kissed the top of my head and hugged me again, this time his arms hugged my body tighter. I loved the way his hugs worked. They filled me with warmth and love.

"**I will, I love you guys."**

"**Love you too Izz"** Rose also gave me a tight hug before they both ran out of the house.

I sat down on the bed, picking up his note. Humph!

I began making the bed, putting the note on his pillow, not bothering to tape it together.

I cleaned the room and it didn't stop there, I cleaned the entire house until it was spotless. I found a diet coke in the fridge and an apple. I grabbed a knife, cutting it and began eating and drinking when I heard a car door shut. I peeked out the window and saw Jasper just walking up to the front door.

My heart began racing in panic instead of anticipation from being away from him. I flew up the stairs just as the front door opened, my body flung at the bedroom door as I locked it. I still had the knife in my hand, I shoved it into the door with all my might, jamming it so he couldn't get in.

I heard his heavy boots running up the stairs, effectively speeding up my heart even more.

"**Bella. Please open the door."** I couldn't let him in. I wasn't going to let him get off that easily.

"**No Jasper. Go away." **I punched the door in anger. I was pissed off at him. The tears began falling down my face and I slid down the door, crumpling on the floor.

His voice had more desperation in it now. **"Please, let me in. Please.. We have to talk, please. Don't…" **

"**Don't… shut me.. Shut me out… Bella Darlin please" **I heard his body slid down the door onto the floor where his body made a huge banging noise when falling to the floor.** "I know what I did was wrong, I knew it from the moment it happened. I just…" **his voice began breaking. **"Don't do this." **

All of a sudden I felt the need to get out. I got off the floor and brushed the tears off my face, which made my eyes sting so bad. I rummaged the closet door for my duffel bag and began packing everything that was mine in it.

"**Bella, you have to know.. Its always been you. I don't need or want this fucking pixie bitch."**

_Pixie Bitch. _Ha! That's what I called her the day I met her and the day my whole life was taken from me, leaving me to rebuild all alone.

I grabbed my cell phone and looked around the room, making sure I didn't forget anything. I was still wearing Jasper's shirt, which I just ripped from my body completely, throwing it at the door, I ripped off the necklace, which I also threw at the door.

"**Shut up Jasper. Just Fucking Shut up" **I was losing it. On top of grieving for the child I lost, I had to also deal with the fact he kissed another woman. I didn't want to hear his sexy, southern voice singing to every fibre of my body. I had to get him to shut up before all my walls came crashing down and I had to forgive him without any sort of work on his part.

I heard him sobbing and I went into the bathroom, I started making too much noise in there, grabbing all my stuff, **"What are you doing Bella? Oh No… "** I could even tell behind a closed door he was getting angry.

"**Jasper, go away" **I couldn't handle this right now. He began pounding the wall with his fists or foot, I couldn't really tell. I flipped open my phone, calling Emmett.

"**Yeah come get me please, bring Rose. Please, I'm scared."**

I was terrified for my life right now. He's upset, not thinking straight and here I am trying to get out of here. The only problem was, he was in my way of the only door out of here. Fuck.

I could hear his attempts to calm himself. His breathing was deep.. My heart wouldn't stop pounding, I thought I would have a heart attack.

I heard him near the bathroom door, fuck I didn't lock it. I turned around running out of the bathroom when the door swung open. I heard his heavy footsteps behind me. **"Bella"** he grabbed my arm.

I ripped my arm from his hand, **"Let me go!"** I began fumbling with the locked door. Fuck.


	40. What Now

*** I don't own twilight or the characters ***

**Don't hate me, I'm just writing things as they come to my mind, and trying to make it all a little less confusing!**

**I was going to wait a few days, but I had to put this up. **

**Sapphire1031 .. I do agree. You have foreseen this chapter so I'm posting it now just for you! Hope it makes Bella or at least some people look like they aren't babying her so much.**

* * *

**He came up behind me, pushing my body into the door lightly, "Bella, please." **he turned me around. I wouldn't look at him, my eyes were closed and I stopped breathing almost completely. I didn't want his scent intoxicating me.

His breath was blowing into my face, it was hot and really quick. My hand kept playing with the lock, trying to get it to open, although I jammed it.

"**Darlin.. Look at me." **his hand cupped my chin. My eyes flew open and I pushed his hand away.

I looked into his eyes, seeing they were just as bloodshot as mine, tears were streaming down his face and a frown took the place of his usual sexy smirk.

"**What do you want? I have to leave here. I can't live with you. I can't trust you. I'm going home."**

**"No, please. Anything but that, please."** the tears kept coming down his face and he was shaking.

I pushed him backwards, he let me, soon as he was far enough I opened the door and shut it quickly, hearing him yell behind me. **"Fuck!"**

I took off down the stairs reaching the door, Jasper came out of nowhere behind me, putting his arms around me and falling backwards so I fell on him. **"You can't leave. The last time you left, you broke my heart and almost never came back. I can't lose you again."**

I felt really scared. I know he'd never hurt me but I couldn't take that chance. He wasn't letting me leave, my heart was throbbing, it was beating too hard for too long, mostly in terror.

I could feel his heart, it was beating about 3 times faster than mine. That wasn't good. That meant his personal demon was going to come out. I couldn't let that happen. He was fighting it back but for how long?

I still had the knife with me, my own survival instincts were coming into play. Thanks to Edward.

Without thinking, I took the knife and jabbed it into his forearm closest to my hand. He yelled in pain, loosing his grip but not letting me go entirely. **"Let me go Jasper."**

He let me go, **"You fucking stabbed me." **

"**Yeah, well your fucking scaring me. Jasper, your nuts. Completely nuts."** I turned towards the door, looking at him one last time.**"Ya think? You are leaving me, I have no fucking idea why, I don't understand what I've done to deserve this and its going to kill me."** His words comming out more slowly now **"Its going to kill you too darlin. Look at you, your heartbroken. You know you don't want to leave."**

I stood there staring at him, he was right. It will kill me. He was collapsed at my feet.

"**When you left that night you ripped my heart out and took it with you along with ninety percent of me. You left yourself here but I couldn't put the parts together, you weren't here. You haunted me, haunted my every thought, my dreams. Everything Bella. You can't leave. Please, we can work on this, I'll do anything if it means you'll stay. Please."**

He was still sobbing. I was really hurting him. I was hurting myself even more. I just stood there staring into his eyes, feeling the hurt between us, the hurt was unbearable.

"**How can we fix this right now? We need time apart. I have to clear my head and so do you." **I broke the eye contact with him and turned around to the door.

"**Darlin, please don't walk out the door. Don't." **

I couldn't take it. I fell in front of the door. I couldn't stand anymore. The pain was unbearable. I know how much I hurt the both of us last time I left. I didn't want to feel that emptiness anymore. I knew what he was talking about, when I left, I ripped out my heart, leaving it and almost all of me here with him. I can't leave.

I heard the knife clatter to the floor, and just then Emmett was pounding on the door.

"**LET ME IN JASPER. YOU FUCKING BASTARD I SWEAR.."** he was angry. Shit. Its all my fault.

I punched the door. **"Ouch, fuck." **I clung to the door and opened it, Emmett saw my face, **"Move Tinks." **I didn't know what was going to happen, I stepped aside and turned to look at Jasper, sitting on the floor, with his head in his lap. Emmett flew right for him.

"**You fucking idiot"** he jumped right on him, freaking out, yelling at him, Rosalie stepped inside and looked me over.

"**Are you okay honey?"** her eyes were filled with tears. **"I heard you on the phone, all that banging around.. I was so scared Isabella. I thought.." **

"**I would never fucking do that Rosalie Hale" **Jasper cut her off, and then Emmett punched him in the face.

"**Emmett!! Please stop, I'm fine. He didn't hurt me, please.. Stop!"**I began crying and pleading. Emmett was just so angry. He turned around and his demeanour completely changed. He scooped me up. **"Oh Tinkerbells. He didn't hurt you?" **He walked me into the kitchen, setting me on the counter so we could see eye to eye. **"He really didn't Emmett. I swear. I was the one who hurt him." **

"**But, the bloody knife.. Didn't he use it on you?" **

I flinched. **"No! He never did. How could you say that?" **I snapped. **"I fucking stabbed him in the arm. I'm the one who needs to be knocked around. I stabbed him, I hurt him. Oh, Emmett, I hurt him" **I began sobbing..

"**Tinks, you did what you had to do. Its okay, I've got your back now. You don't have to feel so terrified. I'm here, nothing is going to happen. Shhhh." **

I fell over into Emmett's shoulder. Just letting myself cry. **"You know when I said to forgive him, not too easily and stuff. I didn't mean fight like cats and dogs and stab the fucker." **he laughed, which made me laugh in return. **"I know, I just.. I felt so defenceless, it.. It reminded me of my instincts with Edward. I had to get out of his grip, I know he'd never hurt me physically but, I felt I had to."**

***JPOV

I laid there on the floor while Roz was on her knees picking up half my body and dragging it onto her body. She didn't say anything, she stroked my hair.. Just looking at me with her blue eyes filled with tears, shaking her head, her pale face pooling with red.

"**I.. I'm confused.. What did I do wrong?"**

She kept shaking her head, I could tell she was getting upset and I couldn't do anything for her. I just laid there like a fucking idiot. I was so pinned by my own confusion.**"Emmett. I was terrified. I was truly scared for my life for a second."**

Oh no.. No.. No … No.. I made her terrified for her own life. I have become Edward. I can't believe I did all this. I wasn't even thinking. I was acting on impulse. I couldn't just let her leave, last time it took forever to get her back and knowing Edward was still out there didn't bode well with me. He would try to get her again and I'd be damned if he'd ever get her again.

I couldn't picture my life without her and now she was definitely leaving because I wasn't thinking straight. I was never going to hurt her. Never. Not physically. The demon wasn't spilling out this time, he was no where to be found within me. And yet, I scared the woman I love more than life itself.

I didn't understand what even set her off. Sure I have a bad ass temper, I kissed some other girl but fuck. I know I'm an asshole and have mentioned it a few times. I even apologized too much for my liking but it's the only way I knew how.

I kept looking to Roz's eyes and her face was completely red **"This doesn't fly"** Rose got up from her kneeling stance and headed into the kitchen.

"**Did you even try to talk to him? Try to work anything out? Or did you run? Just like you ran all those years ago?"** Her voice was threatening. Oh boy, her own temper was spilling over.

"**Rosalie, I never just ran. I tried to explain my case but no one listened. Everyone listened To Carlisle. I didn't run. I started a new life here, away from all of you. I had no family back there!"** Bella was frantic.

"**Rosie, what are you doing?"**

**"Emmett, move. Its time princess Bella got a fucking wake up call."**

"**Wake up call? Rosie, I thought you were on her side with me."**

**"You thought wrong Emmett. I'm always on Whitlock's side. I do love you Bella, I'm sorry that this is happening but you don't even talk to Jasper. How is he suppose to be perfect for you when you don't even talk to him. He doesn't even understand. Do you see what you've turned him into?"**

**"I didn't turn him into anything. He brought this on himself."** Bella snapped. **"How did he? By being honest with you, apologizing? I know you didn't talk to him or Jasper wouldn't have freaked out and made you call us like this."** I heard her fist connecting with what I think was the counter. "**That!"  
****"IS NOT JASPER!"  
"He doesn't lie on the floor crying, you fucking broke him." **That's when I heard it. WHACK! **"You bitch, you fucking broke him" **WHACK! **"If you think you are ever.." **another smack and then her heels dug into my floor clicking quickly out of the room, kneeling over me again.

"**I should have never left without telling you something, without making the two of you talk"**

"**I should be sorry."**

**"No. If she spoke to you, then this wouldn't have happened. Come on, I'll fix you up."**

With her assistance I got off the floor and onto the couch into the living room 6 feet away, she got the first aid kit out of the bathroom upstairs and began working on my injuries.

"**Rosie, what is wrong with you?"** Emmett's tone wasn't very nice. He was really asking for something right now, Roz and her temper isn't very pretty. Compared to her, if you know what I mean

**"Whitlock. Soon as I saw him on the floor like this, I knew it. You know what? I'm staying here, you take that princess home."** she spat back at him. A tone she's ever really used at me, she's never snapped at Emmett like that.

**"Rosie, I'm not leaving without you."** The look on his face, said it all. He was hurt.

**"Yes you are, you chose your side. I have mine. Go. Leave now before I regret things I haven't done yet."** she snapped again, I put my arm on her shoulder while she knelt in front of me. I tried to keep her calm. I didn't need these two fighting it out too.

Emmett knew better than to fight Roz. He walked out of the room and then out of the house with Bella.

**RPOV

Why did I even sit on her side. Go to bat for her against my own best friend?

Wow, Bitch really needs to stop this with him.

After seeing him on the floor like that, that was it. She was no longer having my support. I thought I could support them both, being a good friend to both. My actions have only made it worse.

No one hurts Jasper. Absolutely no one. I back handed her when what I really wanted to do is put her hands around her neck, shake her body and squeeze so hard that her head would pop off. Like those dandelions'. You know that song, "mama had a baby and its head popped off" when you applied that pressure to the base of that annoying weed and watched the yellow bit fly off.

"**I'm really sorry Jasper."**

**"Roz, Its fine. You can't always know what's going on. You were here for her, when I wasn't."** Will you stop fucking protecting her you idiot?!**"Honestly Whitlock, you are better off without her. If she can't work out issues in your relationship with you, its not worth it. You have to stop protecting her!" **

"**What about you and Emmett?"**

**"We'll be fine. We always work out our issues. You and Bella need to do the same or else you will have to end it"**His eyes looked in mine for a sign, any sign telling him I was positive of this.

I hated to see him like this. He was better off alone. As much as I hate to even think this, but he was. It was clear now that they are just running around the issues. When they shouldn't be.

"**Rosalie. I don't know what else to do."**I do. **"Jasper, its time she did something. You need to stop being a gentleman and doing everything for her. Will you be okay alone? I need to talk some sense into little miss princess."** fucking bitch. She needed to be slapped again. Or I could just strangle her, which is what I wanted to do in the first place.

"**Just don't hit her again and we're square." **I really didn't want to leave him alone, but I needed to knock some sense into her.

I left and went to my house. My home.

"**Bella!"** She flew down the stairs into me.

"**You don't talk. Just listen."**

**"You need to come clean with your issues." **I stopped her before she could speak.

**"No, not with me, not with Emmett. Not with anyone but Jasper. Jasper is at his wits end. He doesn't know what else to do. That's on you. You have to put something into this relationship, or else you are back at square one. All alone, no family, no friends and definitely no one to love you, to support you, to protect you.. Nothing"**

"**Now, I'll take you to him, work out your fucking issues or take your shit and leave town. Don't contact any of us ever again, don't see us, especially Jasper. Got it?"**

She nodded.

"**Good let's go."**

I pulled her by the arm and walked out the door, driving back to Jaspers.

"**Now, you work on your issues and then I'm taking you home Bella. I'll be waiting right here."**

She nodded getting out of the car and going inside. I sat in the driveway, waiting, hoping for something to come out of this.

***BPOV

What Rosalie said made sense. Why didn't anyone tell me? I didn't want to end up alone, I wanted to keep the family and friends I made here. I especially wanted to keep Jasper.

I walked inside, Jasper was still sitting on the couch.

"**I'm sorry this was all my fault I didn't meant to take off on you. I just felt so scared."**I just kept talking, I was blubbering like an idiot

"**I just.. With the baby, Your past and then Alice. I don't know. My first instinct has always been to run. But that hurts you and myself. You are right we can't exist without each other."  
****"I shouldn't have been selfish and thought of only my feelings when you told me about your past and then what happened with Alice. I know it took you a long time to finally open up to me about your past, I know it took a lot of you to even remember all that stuff. I just can't believe I was selfish like that. I overreacted and I shouldn't have."  
"Mind you, you shouldn't have kissed Alice in the first place."**

He stood up taking one of my hands, and then stepped backwards, hinting to me to sit on the couch. **"Darlin it didn't go any further. I stopped it. I may have been thinking with my dick in the first initial seconds when it happened, but when I actually thought with my brain, I pushed her away and walked right back to you honey. You have ever right to be mad at me."**

I squeezed his hands. **"No." **I took a breath, trying to de-clutter my mind. "**I have every right to be mad at her. She abused our situation. From now on, we are going to talk about our issues. Well, I am because you've actually been talking about issues you have. I have been keeping them silent."**

He started in again, before I had a chance to finish. **"You think I'm Edward. Or That I'll be like him, so you protect yourself from me. But Darlin, you shouldn't be like this with me. You should be open and honest with me.. Or else this wont work. You almost left tonight, causing me to break down like a fucking baby, I was working on sheer fear and a lot of emotions. I couldn't let you leave and you stabbed me. All I knew is I had to prevent the ultimate hurt for the both of us. The emptiness that fills us when you leave me and our home."**

I pulled on his arm, trying to knock the thought out of his head. **"If you were my dog, you would've been dead already."** He Smirked and laughed. I began speaking again over his chuckling. **"You are NOT Edward. You are so different from him. I am the one who is acting like him. Running away from you, not being honest. Being a bitch, treating you so badly. ."**

Then his face was devoid of any emotion.


	41. Rebuilding

I don't own twilight and/or the characters.

Wow! You guys are QUICK! Here's another Chapter! Thanks so much for still reading. I know I've been a little overboard with this stuff. The comments are appreciated. I try to take them all in consideration, especially when I haven't written ahead, to sort of incorporate ideas.

almazuna18 - you've forseen something.

1MrsECullen - Its never too much!

Sapphire1031 - big girl pants is right. I'm trying to figure out what will happen next but who knows!

YOU GUYS ARE AWESOME!! THANKS AGAIN!!

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"**Darlin, you couldn't kill me. You'd torture me, that is the worst. See, anyone can shoot me, beat me, kill me or whatever, but you?" **he shifted closer to me, **"You can walk out and leave, you can inflict the worst pain imaginable in me.. You have all of me. You always have, ever since I crashed into you."**

He wasn't finished. **"Yes you have your own issues, I have my own too.. Its never been that hidden from you, you knew what I was before I even told you about my past.. but its time to get past them. I'm sure if it doesn't happen soon, Rosalie will make good on her word." **

I had to reassure him I wasn't going to let us be torn apart. **"We aren't going to fight like this ever again. No one is going to come between us. Alice is forgotten. Edward is forgotten. You and I is all that matters. I'm really sorry I put you through so much Jasper. It was never my intention to hurt you. I Love you. I really do. I'll make a better effort of showing you."**I inspected his face, some scratches and bruises from Emmett. I looked at his arm. **"Does it hurt?" **he shook his head. **"I can't believe I did that to you. I don't understand." **he put a finger to my lips. **"If I could. I'd kill Edward. If he never did that shit to you, you wouldn't have stabbed me. You were afraid. I'm just sorry I made you afraid.""This is all my fault Jasper. None of it is yours. If I stopped hiding behind a wall, this wouldn't have happened. Do not blame yourself, this one is all on me. Including the Stabbing. My fault and my fault alone. No one else's."**

Jasper looked at me with his ice blue eyes. **"Okay, you win."** he smirked at me. **"I have to go home tonight. We can have dinner tomorrow, start fresh okay? It might be better if we don't live together for a little while, we can repair this relationship."**I leaned into his body and kissed his neck, he hummed in response.** "Okay. We'll do that. I still love you though."**

He got up from the couch, offering his hand and walking me to the door, pulling me into a hug. **"I love you too." **I breathed in his scent and walked out. Walking away from the man I have broken.

I got into the car and not even 2 seconds later Rosalie was asking me questions.

"**So, did you talk?"** I nodded. **"And?"** I put on my seat belt as she backed out of his driveway and began driving on the road.

"**We aren't going to live together for a while. We're going to take it slow and repair our relationship. Mostly me doing the work, since I did slowly tear us apart, almost." **Rosalie Smiled. **"Good. Its about time you acted like a fucking woman and not a fucking 5 year old. But, you ever drive him to that state again and you wont be back handed twice Swan.""I understand. Why did you switch sides?" **this confused to me to no end.

"**I was always on both of yours. Mostly Jaspers. He's my best friend, but when I walked in there tonight.. I knew you overreacted you didn't even talk to him like I told you to many times before Swan. How could you? He is NOT Edward. I think you need to sort that out."**

That made sense. Again with Edward? **"I know he's not Rosalie. I've just been under a lot of shit lately.."**She cut me off, **"Yeah well so has Jasper. On top of losing the baby, telling you about his past, his fuck up with Alice, his own temper issues and you also forget he also has to work to keep a roof over your heads because lets face it, that coffee shop wouldn't pay for everything and he's also had to take care of the both of you on top of that. You never made that very easy for him. Stop thinking about yourself Swan."**Without a warning she snapped further **"Never again will you treat him like that. I'll hunt you down and kill you with my bare hands.. I may love you but Jasper comes first, he always will over anyone else."** She glared at me.

We drove the rest of the way in silence. Now I realized Rosalie the bitch wasn't too far behind Rosalie the loving, carefree girl I knew. She really would kill for Jasper. As would I. Now, to focus on not losing him.

I went to sleep, dreaming of Jasper. I dreamt of us and 4 kids at his family's ranch. All running around. 3 boys and 1 girl. The girl had light brown hair that was blond in the sun and pretty blue-green eyes like her grandfather. She was really clumsy like me but was strong and laughed it off like Jasper.

The three boys were play fighting, 2 of them blond hair. One had caramel hair with red and blond highlights in it. They all had blue eyes. The youngest, with caramel hair decided to break away from the play fighting and walked over to the railing petting a horse. He reminded me so much of myself as a kid. Just wanted to keep to himself, admiring the world through his naive eyes.

My alarm blared. Why does it always ruin the sweetest dreams?I got out of bed. Well, stumbled, falling in the process. I showered, changed and then went to work. Just going through the motions. Thankfully Angela was working with me so it wasn't too boring. We chatted a little before I opted to go home early. I was too tired and sore to work today. Besides, we only had 2 people come in for coffee. There was no point in even staying. I clocked out.

**JPOV

The next day was easier than most days. I didn't feel so anxious as I probably was recently. I didn't even register it in my brain until it was gone. I guess being in a relationship really does fuck with you. I pushed the thought from my mind and focused on the task at hand.

I read through a document, outlining a company head had to be present to oversee building infractions and the like. People really wanting to make this right and not have red tape around this mess. They were tearing down and rebuilding on a former Militia base. I didn't see anything wrong with it. Apparently the government did. They were going to pay us 3.2 million just to have one of us there.

That was a ton of money, I couldn't turn it down, it would mean a positive place for those people but, I was going into dangerous waters. That country wasn't fairing too good. Violence and shit everywhere. It was one of the most Dangerous places on the Planet. Yet, I had to go. These people needed the buildings, I'd do it for free, but I'd probably come back in a wooden box if I was lucky.

Nigeria. I was really putting this trip off, opting to let Peter go. I couldn't have him go, he was going to have a baby in a few days. I wasn't going to do that to him. Frankly, myself, I could use a break from this town, clear my head and get away.

I signed the paper, adding my own personal note, a guarded safe place to live and making sure everyone on the site would be safe from any violence. Militia Included.

I faxed the paper over myself, picking up the phone- I began making the arrangements. Nigeria.

I also called Peter and Rose. Letting them know I was going to be gone for 3 months overseeing the project, in 2 weeks. They complained a little, letting me know I was stupid for going to Nigeria and I should let someone else go. I argued back.

I hung up and made one more call.. _Bella._

I picked her up for dinner later on and we started rebuilding our fucked up relationship. We talked mostly about what drove us to crazy extremes last night and we even cried. We both agreed we would bury our child in a private ceremony. To bring us both closure, which we both needed. Bella took over the arrangements and I'd pay for it- I didn't care about the cost. Bella did, obviously but who cares, nothing is too good for my kid.

After a few hours, I drove her home. I felt so weird. Not having her with me, laying beside me, spending the night, kissing me.. The way she turns over away from me when I have bad morning breath. Mostly, I missed her. The house is eerie without her.

***BPOV

After my dinner with Jasper, time began to go faster. One night turned into many days.

Within the next week I was back in Esme's office, she told me I was fine and I can just proceed with my normal activities with no trouble. I also made arrangements for our Child. So we could have our closure, we were going to bury him this weekend.

I headed to work, serving everyone from little boys who said I was pretty, to obnoxious teenagers, horny men and elderly couples.

We were closing for the night, no one was left in the restaurant, I mopped the floor and Angela counted the cash. I checked to make sure the door was locked and finished mopping.

"**Bella! Hey, We're headed to our usual spot, say you'll come." **

I had been avoiding them lately. **"Yeah, let me clean up and I'll meet you guys there" **I smiled. I really missed my friends.

I rushed home and showered. Wanting the grease and coffee smell off of me. After drying myself off, I applied some makeup and found a nice blue top that hugged my torso and had a deep neckline. I found some black pants that hugged me also and inspected myself in the mirror. I looked pretty good. I called Angela, and caught her outside of the club.

Its been years since I actually went out and had fun, just me and my friends.

I stayed near the bar all night drinking with Mike and Ben. It didn't really matter that we were getting completely shit faced. We all split for a taxi ride home. I got dropped off at Mikes, it was now about 4 in the morning on a Saturday and my phone began ringing.

"**Hello?""Hi, I'm at your place, where are you? I'll come get you.""Jasper, I'm at Mikes place, I'm not drunk what are you talking about.. Stupid cowboy."**

He laughed into the phone, **"I'll be there in a minute.""Yeah, Yeah" **I hung up.

I leaned against Mike, telling me to sit out here with me until Jasper not even 5 minutes later he pulled up, getting out of the car and lifting me bridal style, walking back towards the car.

"**Thanks Mike! Drinks on me soon buddy!"**Mike yelled something back and I was soon falling asleep.

* * *

I've been listening to the 100 monkeys lately. Much more than usual. Anyone else? Thought I'd mention them seeing as though they really help me write.


	42. Plans

*I don't own twilight or these characters*

Sorry its taken me so long guys! School started up again and well… I tried to make a long chapter for you guys. Enjoy!

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I woke up very confused. How the hell did I get home? I remember getting into the taxi and going to Mike's. Oh god. He wasn't here, please god tell me I didn't sleep with him.

I peeled off my clothes, changing into track pants and a tank top. I smelt my clothes from last night, just as I thought cigarettes and vodka. No Sex smell. Thank god.

I made my way downstairs, not tripping anything for once in my life, I began to make coffee , filling the coffee maker and flipping it on. I suddenly felt like listening to music, I turned on the radio. My hangover wasn't so bad so I began to sing to "Beat It" and danced around the kitchen. So I was a closet Michael Jackson fan. He's awesome. Who didn't know one of his songs?

Finally my coffee was ready, I gulped down a bit and stared into space, thinking about how far I've come and how stupid I was.

"**Mornin" **His voice rang out through my mind, shocking me in the process and making me drop my coffee.

"**Sorry.. I uh.."** his eyes inspecting my frame. My eyes doing the same. Then he cleared his throat. **"I didn't mean to startle you." **

He walked around me and grabbed 2 mugs from the cupboard and turned down the radio turning it into background noise rather than a concert. He poured coffee into both of them. **"Here Darlin, I've got it. I made the mess, I'll clean it up."** I took my coffee from him as his hands found themselves at my waist. He smirked, not breaking eye contact. His blue eyes were piercing my very soul, **"Can't clean this up with you standing here so.."** he lifted me up and set me on the counter, winking at me and then began cleaning up my coffee stained, porcelain covered floor.

I just sat there, staring like a child.

His perfect back, fit and muscular, but not too muscular, his blond hair was all over the place, bed hair. The small lines down his back making them look alabaster against his already pale skin. His shoulder had a scar running down towards his bicep. Probably from his accident. I don't really know for sure.

This when I noticed. He was in boxers and not wearing any socks.

"**Jazz, be careful. You are barefoot and don't cut your hands." **

He chuckled at me. **"Darlin. I've done this a million times, its fine. Don't worry."** He cleaned it up completely and stood in front of me, with his coffee in his hands.

I examined his face. Lines on his forehead, probably from scrunching his eyebrows together or from trying to read something without his contacts or glasses. He had bags under his eyes, which was to be expected. We both looked like hell. He hadn't shaved in a few days and he was wearing a small but very sexy crooked smirk. I laughed at him. **"What are you smiling for?"**

He smiled a little more. **"I'm watching you look at me. Your face is so concentrated on me. Its very interesting to watch. Seeing as though you were just dancing to Michael Jackson 2 minutes ago.""Shut up." **I hit his arm playfully and he grabbed it. His eyes met my own I must have looked frightened because he just let it go and watched it fall.

"**I'm not afraid of you. Its just been a while since, you've touched me like that." **he nodded and took a sip of his coffee.

"**Its alright."**I was trying to break this weird tension between us. **"So, um.. How did you end up here last night?"  
"I actually came over to speak with you. Sat in your hall forever, called you.. You were a little drunk and at Mike's. When I brought you back here it was 4am. When I finally tore you from me, it was close to 5am so I just crashed on your couch. Hope that's okay."  
"No, no. Its fine. You're my boyfriend. I'm sorry you had to tear me off of you. That was probably not that fun." **I cringed. Here we were trying to rebuild our relationship and I was probably trying to fuck him when all he was being was a gentleman and trying to respect our new boundaries we both set.

"**It was quite funny actually but it sucked at the same time."** he chuckled a little under his breath.

"**What did you want to talk about?" **My curiosity peaked.

"**I ended up taking a job that starts a week from tomorrow and keeps me busy for 3 months, which makes the company a lot of money." **

"**That doesn't sound so bad."**

"**Yeah.."** he broke the eye contact between us and stared into his coffee mug, his finger swirling around the top of the mug, **"Its no where in town."** he took another sip of his coffee.. **"It's over in Nigeria. I have to be there for 3 months. They want a department head over there and seeing as though me and Peter are the department heads of the company.."**

I let out in a small whisper. **"You're going because Peter can't." **he nodded.

"**They really need this building built over there. It looks like its going to be turned into a medical centre and on the other side its going to be a safe haven for families who have suffered and lost their homes to the militia."** my eyes fell, looking at my floor. We. Were. Over. That was it.

I tried not to panic and freak out. He seemed to realize this and grasped my hands. **"This relationship is important to me, don't think I'm running away because I'm really not. This is bad timing I know but I can't leave them without a sensible person to over see this thing. We will talk all the time on the internet and on the phone, anything to repair us." **

I shushed him. I felt pretty upset about this but it was a good thing he was going to do over there. I couldn't keep him here, away from helping people who needed it.

Compromise. This is one of the ways a relationship works.

"**I'll be honest, I'm upset about it, I don't want you to go but.. You need to go. Help those people, build that building. Let them have a safe place to go and a place to help them when they're sick. We can do the internet and phone calls. It'll be good for both of us, we can really get to the root of things instead of all the sexual attraction that we always feel." **

He smiled at me. **"Are you sure?" **I nodded. **"Darlin.. There will always be a sexual attraction between us no matter if we're face to face or we're on opposite ends of the earth. We draw each other closer in.. like magnets.. Besides, you always make me want you. Emotionally, mentally and physically"**

He moved closer to me, lifting my chin and brushing his lips against mine.

"**Just be careful Jasper. Seriously.""I will Darlin.. Now what are we eating for breakfast?"**

We spent the rest of the morning making breakfast. Most of it ended up on the floor or on one of us but we didn't care.

After breakfast we sat on the couch and talked some more. Until mid afternoon.

"**Darlin.. I have to get to the Ranch, I promised the major I'd be there. I'll see you later on this week"  
"Yeah, I'll give you a call on Wednesday and we'll figure out a time and day." **he kissed the top of my head and rushed out the door. **"Love you" **he repeated it back and I heard my door shut. I walked over to lock it and walked upstairs, Man I hate drinking. I felt crappy, I crawled back into my bed listening to my ipod until I passed out. Good cure for a hangover, no bright lights, no noise and sleep!

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***JPOV

"**Mr. Whitlock, you have 3 calls from Mr. Whyte in regards to the construction starting on Monday after you arrive, he needs your final sign off on the project before you leave. Also, your father called." **Fuck, how many times did she need to bug me today. it's the sixth time she's been by my office giving me shit. Usually, she just sits at her desk and pages me from there, why all the face time with her annoying voice?

"**Thanks Jessica. I'll call you when I need you." **Fuck anything to shut you up and get you out of here.

I looked over my contract and made sure no one was going to get screwed. This would be the last thing I need.

**BPOV

The next few days went by in a complete blur. Next thing I even remember my brain partly functioning was when I had dinner with Jasper.

"**I can't do that! What about work? What are you going to tell them?"** he threw me for a complete loop.

"**Yes you can. Just come out 2 weeks after I do. I will handle the company, I'm hiring you as my documentator. Basically, cover my ass if they fuck up and try to say its me."** he winked.

"**Are you serious?" **I felt like I was dreaming. I was all for going, this gave us a better chance to escape the endless meddling in our lives.

"**Yeah, I put in a request this morning. I should know by tomorrow morning. Are you in babe?""Am I ever! But wait, I'm not an official documentator.."** I don't even know what to do.

"**You know how to work a computer and a camera. I'll be reading the blueprints anyways, you just have to document everything that goes up, all the plans and anything that is agreed apon. You will have 100% of my assistance anyways. I just cant sit and type for hours on end so this is where you come in babe."**  
**"So, your hiring me for this project and I'll have to quit my own job?"**

"Yeah or take a leave of absence. I'm sure since you're helping over there they don't mind and if they do.. You can always find another job if you want babe."  
"Sure. Lets do this!"  
"Are you sure?" he was questioning me? **"Do you really think, when given the opportunity I would fucking sit here alone, with our relationship on thin ice while you are halfway across the world?"** Yeah right. Like I was about to let some other girl get in-between us, there is no way.  
**"I know. Plus, just think, we'll be away from everyone we know and get back to basics, how we used to be before anyone else was added in the mix"**

I smiled at him and we continued with our night out.

***JPOV

I hated waiting. I hated signing contracts and I hated waiting on a decision. I began chewing on my pen, I was nervous as fuck, they can easily say fuck you no. No women allowed. Technically, women aren't suppose to work, have a right for anything really. Stupid fucking government over there.

The Bigots have to know that without women, us men would never survive. They are truly the better half of us. The saying is true, behind every great man is an even greater woman. I'm glad I live in this country. I don't think I could handle controlling the fuck out of my girl, raping her, beating her in every way possible, not letting her have a life, turning her into a prisoner in her own home, only looking to her for sex- just to procreate and food.

I just hope that when this building is constructed and ready to open many families, mostly woman and children will have a place to run to, to get away from the sick bastards in life. I just wish I could also construct an area to fucking shoot the fucking bastards.

I have to forget about this, I had to think about the funeral. God, is this really necessary? Its going to make us more miserable. Funerals are NOT the way to have closure. Whoever thought of that is a flipping idiot, they obviously were doing it for the money because no one in their right mind is all of a sudden better after a funeral.


	43. Black Day

*I don't own twilight or these characters*

So, I tend to like things in Jasper's POV. To all those angry people who messaged me telling me there is too much in Jasper's POV.. Oh well!

Sorry this has taken so long, I've been sick.

&

I've lost my godmother/grandmother recently so this chapter - I tried not to touch too much on it even though I probably did, so in a way this is dedicated to her.

Her Initials are JW.. I just thought.. Since she passed as I was writing this, I would have her in this somehow.

* * *

I spent days trying to finalize this thing. They wanted an extra 2 months out of me, yeah right. Soon the days started blending together and then it was Saturday.

The Saturday I wanted to bleach my brain for.

Earlier this morning I put a wall up, today was the day I was going to be strong and keep myself together for the sake of everyone but mostly Bella.

The funeral took place, I tried to numb myself, not wanting to have this memory burned into my brain.

We would've had a boy.

His casket was really tiny, etched into it was wild horses running about, free and full of life. What he would've been. _J.W._ engraved at the top. _Jonathan Whitlock._

There were blue and white flowers that sat atop the coffin and around the grave.

Bella could barely stand. She clung to me for dear life and I hung onto her, not letting her fall.

This was hard, the service was short and everyone came. It was nice to see everyone again, too bad it was like this. Rosalie tried to mend bridges with Bella, but she was too inconsolable to even talk to her. Rosalie knew this wasn't the time but, like always, just didn't give a shit and tried to make amends.

Dad really held it together. Not that it surprised me, I just never thought he would even come in fear for actually showing some emotion. His face and body posture screamed strength and a sense of peace. I was drawing from his strength, my eyes met his and he just nodded. His eyes shot back down to the ground. He was thinking about mama, probably and how she would've hated a day like this.

I closed off my mind to everyone except Bella and our little boy. Staring down his grave, I couldn't grasp how this all came to be. How my boy would never have a chance to stare into his mothers beautiful eyes, he would never get to throw around a football with me in the yard. We wouldn't get the chance to chase our little boy around, weather it be from him covered in mud running around in the clean house or just because we were playing a game.

So many things wouldn't happen now. Okay Whitlock, think positive not negative.

It seems horrible but we'll have other chances, this little baby was just meant for something more than life here on earth.

I finally got her to sit down, she wouldn't move from the grave. My Inner peace began cracking, the pain I was feeling from myself and what was pouring out of Bella was seeping through the cracks of my carefully placed brick wall. I couldn't hold on to being strong and pulled together, I let myself become weak, I let the pain pour out of my wall, letting the brick wall be completely demolished. I began crying, I didn't care if it made me look weak, that is my kid and he never got a chance to live.

I cluched onto Bella even harder, we both sobbed in sync with each other. I felt my heart doubling over in pain. This was unbearable. I don't know how long we both sat there but we eventually stopped to the sound of little chicklets chirping, which was very annoying.

I lifted my head and used one of my sleeves to wipe my tears away. Bella who had made her way into my lap during our heartbreaking sob fest looked up at me with tears running down her face.

"**I'm sorry Darlin.. I.."** her lips touched mine ever so lightly. She was still trembling. My arms wrapped around her tighter, her body completely up against me.

"**Don't be, I love you." **her hands unzipped my coat and her arms wrapped themselves around my torso, we sat there, beside the grave, clinging to one another. I stared again, down at the coffin. Man, this day will stay with me forever. My beautiful little boy. My little _Johnny. _The little boy who would've been his Father's best bud and the apple of his Mama's eye.

Suddenly I felt an overwhelming sense of serenity.

_Peter._

I could always _feel _his presence before I felt or saw him.

He stood in front of me. His hand touching my shoulder, grasping tightly. Bella unwrapped herself from me, kissed my cheek and ran off behind me.

I stood up, still keeping my gaze over my son's grave. My arms finding the back of my older brother, the man who always made sure my stone cold heart came out of the freezer to thaw out every so often. My body became limp, it all became too much, I felt my legs turn into rubber bands, I felt like falling into a black hole..

"**Easy Kid. It's all good, your keeper's here."** Keeper.. Ha.

"**Keeper? You good sir, hold me together!"** I slapped his back. He just laughed.

"**Ha! You said it!" **

He slapped my back. **"You alright now? Let's go be with our girls huh?"**

"**Yeah.. Yeah" **

Peter wrapped his arm around me and edged me forward. Away from the grave and towards our soul mates.

I gave Charlotte a hug and she whispered she loved me. She was heavily pregnant.

I put my hands on her belly, tears ran down my face and I looked into Charlotte's eyes. **"I love you. You know that?" **Tears flowed down her face as she touched my hands. She was truly my sister. After everything I did to her, she still loved me as much as I loved her.


	44. Boarding Call

*I don't own twilight or these characters*

I'M SOOO SORRY FOR LEAVING THIS UPDATE TOO LONG!

My computer crashed so I lost the next 5 chapters. I'm trying to remember all that I wrote but its hard. Plus, with school, being sick and dealing with my own personal sadness it's tough. I tried to write this as best I could, after reading this, my First draft (which I lost) was BETTER than this.

* * *

**JPOV

I hope to never remember yesterday's pain for as long as I shall live.

I rolled out of bed, worst sleep of my life. Bella was still sleeping soundly. Thank god. We were so emotionally drained but, it was much harder on her, I hated seeing her so broken. Hopefully, now we can continue healing.

I jumped into the shower, making the water extra hot. I needed to get rid of the cold bitterness I felt.

The hot water ran down the back of me, I turned around letting the water hit my chest.. Suddenly two hands began scratching my scalp, I could smell the shampoo instantly.

I groaned. **"The perfect timing for the queen."**

"**The king should've woke her up." **I turned around, allowing the water to rinse my hair.

"**I'm sorry hon." **I leaned down closer to her, giving her a chaste kiss. She grabbed my face and pushed me against the wall. The cold wall sent a shock through my body. I picked her up and turned our bodies so her back was against the wall.

She gasped loudly, I made quick work and plunged into her, I moaned loudly as her warm walls clamped down around me.

Her legs wrapped around my waist and water was pouring down her face, I hunched over her face, allowing all the water hit my back.

I kept pulling in and out, every time she kept up with the momentum, meeting my thrusts with even more force making me deeper and deeper every single time. It didn't take long before we were both falling over the edge.

"**I love you."**

"**Love you even more Darlin"**

The water was now cold, I stepped out grabbing two towels, wrapping her in one first and then myself.

"**I don't want you to go."** her tiny hand wrapped around mine.

"**I know Darlin.. I don't want to either but just think, in two weeks, it'll be just you and me for 2 and ½ months. No one in our way."**

She smiled and walked into the bedroom. I followed.

"**Can we just stay in here until you have to go?"**

"**Of course."**

I scooped her into my arms and laid her ontop of me, holding her close, breathing her in.

"**I'll miss this the most."** she sighed.**"Oh really?" **I flipped on top of her, letting my new erect dick hit her sensitive spot.

"**Mmmm. 2nd**** most missed thing then."**

I began filling her, tenderly massaging and kissing her body. Her hands tracing every scar on my back, lightly kissing my chest and neck. Every kiss sent electric currents through my body. I felt so alive.. The adrenaline only fuelled the electricity between us. Every time my rough hands ran over her soft body, her legs, hips, her rib cage.. Spending some time on her wonderful breasts, gaining a moan from the goddess beneath me..

The sweet feeling of being loved.

As slow and tender as our love making had started, it had a quick end. She clenched around me and I spilled over into her.

For once since I woke up, I felt at peace. I was really going to miss her. Mentally, emotionally and physically.

I rolled off of her and snuggled beside her. Still trying to clear my now cloudy mind and get my breathing in check.

"**Can you never leave again?""Next time it happens you're with me from the get go honey."**

She kissed my nose and snuggled into my body.

"**I love you."**

I fell asleep with my beautiful girl in my arms, my phone chirped, I turned over, ignoring it. Bella grabbed it, answering it immediately.

"**H..Hello?"**I could hear my phone shut much too hard.

"**Jazz.. Get up, we've got under an hour to get to the airport for you, Petey's driving."**

I flipped over, getting on top of Bella. Leaving open mouthed kisses all over her face and neck. **"Fuck it. Your STILL mine for the next 15 minutes."**

We made beautiful love twice, then quickly cleaned ourselves up and bolted out of the house, to beat Pete by a minute.

I slipped my jacket around Bella and stuck my hat on her, before taking her hand in mine. She smiled at me.

"**Darlin.. I cant wait to start fresh.""Me either."**

I grabbed my bags as Peter pulled up in his truck and we jumped in.

The drive to the airport seemed too short.

No one really said much of anything. We let the radio break the silence.

We arrived at the airport and I checked in, getting my ticket and walked over to my gate.

I kept my arm around my girl the entire time, holding her close to me.

_Its just two weeks, Nothing's going to happen, you'll have her back in 2 weeks, away from the world. You'll be able to rebuild and be stronger together._

I kept giving myself mental encouragement. I don't know why a creepy feeling whenever my thoughts drifted from being away from Bella. I gotta stop this, its just separation anxiety. Fuck. I need to pull myself together.

_First boarding call for flight 902, hate 54.._

"**Well, that's me."** I took my arm from Bella's shoulders and turned to Peter, he pulled me in a hug, nearly crushing me. Exactly what I was thinking of doing.

"**I know you've got a lot on your plate but please.. Take good care of her."**

"**Always. Don't worry Jay."**

I turned to Bella, who now had my hat covering her eyes, I took her in my arms, taking the hat off of her, putting it on my own head.

"**Blue Bells. I'll be over there, come over when your ready."** He pointed over to the coffee shop just down the way. She nodded, waving him off.

_Second Boarding call for Flight 902, gate 54._

"**This sucks. I love you. I'll call you any moment I have free.""I love you.""I can't wait 'til your with me Darlin"**

I smiled at her, pulling her closer.

Her face titled up towards mine, I pulled her onto my shoes, making it a little easier.

Her brown eyes were filled with tears. She hated this as much as I did, god. If it wasn't going to cost me millions I'd just cancel it and stay here with her.

I kissed her softly. She didn't even hesitate, pulling me closer, kissing me with such passion.

_Final Boarding call for Flight 902, gate 54_

I broke our embrace.

"**I'm Sorry. Darlin""Don't.. please don't.""I.. "**

"**Don't do this. You have to go, like you said, I'll be there soon. Don't apologize.""I shouldn't be go..""Jasper. Stop and go. Get on that plane."**She stepped away from me.

"**I'll be waiting on the other side of those doors with open arms to crush you with.""I Love you"**She jumped into my arms, her lips crashing against mine.

This time she broke the embrace.

"**I'll see you in 10 days Darlin. Love you."**

I picked up my carry on and she began walking away from me.

I ran after her, grabbing her waist and spinning her around. **"Hang on Darlin, here.." **I grasped my hand, taking off my ring handing it to her.**"Oh no.. I can't take th.."**

"**Bella. Listen, I'm leaving at a wrong and horrible time. Whenever you feel alone, you'll be able to look at that and know you aren't. Do you realize how much I love you?""Its your mother's I shouldn't have this.""You should. Its yours. I'm yours."**She kissed me again and pushed me towards the gate, laughing.

"**Go before you miss your flight.""I'm going."**A smile danced across her face and I finally took off running to my gate, ripping off everything medal on me, going through the scanners and grabbing my stuff not even putting my shoes back on, just barely making it in time to board the plane.

**PPOV

I really admired the strength this kid had. I don't condone this whatsoever. I'm glad he went in my place. Charlotte was going to have our baby any moment and I couldn't bare to miss or leave her alone with our baby.

I don't think he should've left now though. He's grieving. Bells is Grieving. Mental note, try to balance a new family lifestyle and try to make sure Bells doesn't get too depressed and lonely.

I ordered two coffees and took a seat, giving them privacy. I can't actually believe they've been through so much yet, they still find enough strength to fight it all. I always knew Jasper was strong. The frigid person he can get, I never thought that he'd find a girl as strong as he is, never mind the fact she's much stronger.

I don't know how they do it. God knows no one's perfect.

My thoughts were disturbed by a blond who tapped my shoulder.

"**Hi handsome."** She batted her eyelashes. Yeah, doesn't work on this chump honey. I've got a better blond at home.

I opened my mouth to speak.

"**Actually it is, excuse me."** Bells!

"**Sorry I took so long honey, you know baggage check, they can't seem to do anything right."** I stood and wrapped my arms around her. To everyone else, it looked like we were together but her and I knew, our hug was of family love.

"**Let's get out of here handsome"**

Her eyes narrowed at the girl. I had to hold my laughter back.

We both walked out of the airport, my arm around her shoulder.

"**You doing alright sugar?""I'm fine."**

"**If you say so, I'm taking you to Char. She's missed you."**

She smiled and nodded. Yeah, your fine. Fine like rotten apples.

**BPOV

I'll be honest, I didn't want him to go. It hurt.

I really liked the idea of how it would just be me and him, we could become stronger and rebuild our relationship.

Right now, I have to think about Charlotte. That woman has to be ready to give birth by now! I swear, she should be induced. I was happy that I'd be able to see her though.

We pulled up to the ranch. I wondered why we were here.

"**Being here is easier on Char. She's got Dad here and she hates being alone, in the city. If it were up to her, we'd Live here."**I nodded getting out of the truck as soon as it was put in park and took off inside, leaving Peter in my dust.

"**Hello Sweet doll face."**

"**Hi dad."**

There he stood in front of me. The near spitting image of the man I love.

He looked really good. No bags underneath his blue-green eyes, his hair was combed back a bit, giving him a "just showered" look, I could make out more red then blond. God it was a nice shade of hair. He had a Johnny Cash kind of look to him, black button up shirt and jeans, with some cowboy boots.

I found myself in his big bear arms. He smelled like peppermint. He squeezed me a little and laughed.

"**What's so funny?""I haven't hugged a girl this hard in a while. Pete's being overbaring.""That's okay. You can hug me as much as you want."** I smiled into his chest. I really loved his hugs.

He squeezed me again and then put his hands on my shoulders, pushing me away from his chest slightly.

"**You still look beautiful Doll face.""If I didn't would you still call me doll face?""Your always beautiful honey."**

I smiled at him. He had a smirk on his face. The sly Whitlocks and their smirks. I immediately thought to the son we lost.

Peter suddenly came up from behind me and wrapped his arms around me.

"**What's wrong honey?"**I squeezed my eyes tightly together as Peter kept his tight hug around me and his dad stroked my hair.

I took a couple deep breathes and finally spoke, opening my eyes hoping tears wouldn't fall from them. **"Its just.. I wondered if my son would've inherited that smirk you all have."**

Dad laughed softly. **"Of course. All Whitlocks do. I'm sure he would've had your break taking smile too. I'm sorry doll.. I.." **

I shook my head at him.

"**Why isn't that son of a bitch here? I oughta…""Its fine, I'm joining him in about 2 weeks."**Shock registered on his face when we heard the cry upstairs.

* * *

For all the people who still read, thank you! I promise to not leave you all waiting so long ever again!More to come in the next few days!

Since I haven't written ahead AT ALL.. Do have an idea and trying to recall what I already wrote but maybe some of you want to have some input? Just a thought. Let me know! ENJOY

REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!!!


	45. Reading

Peter took off up the stairs, leaving me and his father in the hallway.

"**Do you think?" **

He nodded. **"Think so. She's had some close calls but she's never cried out like that. You get the car pulled up and I'll call the hospital."**I nodded taking off outside, starting the car and bringing as close to the porch as I could, I put it in park and opened the passenger door and the back door.

Peter came out holding Charlotte.

**"Hi Sugar, looks like your going to be a busy aunt." **She grabbed my hand and kissed it.**"Of course, now Bells your driving.."** Peter looked to me as he helped Charlotte in the car.

"**I bet your gonna be glad when the fat me is gone."** I cocked an eyebrow at Peter. **"Amour.. You've never been fat. Just concentrate on that baby."**

Ah, Petey.

"**Papa, move your ass. Let's go. In the car NOW!"**I held my breathe, never once did I hear the boys take that tone with him. Only the girls, his personal nurses when he'd get locked the house and rushed into the car."**We're buckled go Bells!"**I turned the car around and zipped down the driveway.

I kept biting my lips. I was nervous, what if I couldn't get there in time?

What if I got into an accident? Oh god.

Dad patted my leg. **"Its alright honey."**

He turned back to his phone. **"Hello, this is Peter Whitlock Sr. I need to speak with Doctor Cullen please.."** he paused. **"Charlotte Whitlock.. Yes.. She's about to go into labour. Her water broke about 3 minutes ago"** he paused again. **"How far apart son?"**

"**Not very far apart." **

"**Not very far apart… Uh huh.. She was due a week ago.. Yeah, Doctor Cullen.. Uh huh, alright… thank you"**

Thank god! Esme. Esme would be the best person to bring a baby into this world. I chimed in with Charlotte's breathing, trying to keep myself calm and give her some support.

"**We're almost there sweetie."**

I pulled up to the entrance and jumped out, heading for the emergency entrance and grabbing a wheelchair for Charlotte, it has to be more comfortable then Peter's arms at the moment. Although, I'm sure she would pick his arms like I would Jazz. I shook off the thought immediately and got back to the task at hand.

I pulled up to the car and helped Charlotte into the chair, her face was flushed and her hair got all in her face. I tied it back quickly, Peter took the handles on the chair and whisked her in.

"**Wait here doll. I'll park."**I waited for him to park and then we both made our way inside.

"**It might be a while doll.. Want some coffee?"**

"**Sure.. I've got to call Jazz so I might be outside."**

**"Take your time honey. Tell that son of mine I said to come get you before I take you."**

A smile flashed across his face and he winked. "**I shall."**

I headed outside and dialled Jazz' number.

Oh please pick up. I hope you can.

"**Hiya Darlin.."  
"Hiya stranger."**

"**What's with calling me? Not that I mind but I am on a flight, cell phones aren't permitted.."**

"**I know. I'm sorry. I thought I'd let you know soon as we got to the Ranch, Charlotte's water broke and we're now at the hospital"**

**"What? Really?"**

**"Yeah, I was the maniac driver"**  
We both laughed.**"You dad also says hello and to hurry back for me, or else he just might take me off your hands." **

**He laughed. "He would say that. My dad loves you a lot you know." **

**"He loves you too. He's just disappointed you aren't here right now."  
"So am I."  
"I love you. Call me when you land. I don't care what time it is."  
"Love you too Darlin.. I will. Give Charlotte a kiss for me."  
"I will."  
**_click_

I headed back inside and went to the waiting room.

I picked up a magazine and began reading up on what was happening in Brangelina's life.

Haha. So the paps were going to get sued for printing a false story. That's what you get I guess. Its really sad though, its like they're ants being chased by a insect specialist or something.

Is it really necessary to follow them around like puppy dogs, taking a million pictures? So what if they're with their kids? Just makes me angry. Although, I am contradicting myself by reading this, but it's a hospital, besides newspapers, there is only tabloid rags around.

I must have been deep in my thoughts, my shoulder was touched and I turned to face Dad.

**"Took you long enough."  
"I'm sorry?"**

**His eyebrows were scrunched together.**

**Oh Fuck Me. **

* * *

***PWPOV (P= Peter / PW= Peter Sr. - Don't think its too hard but it would ease the confusion.)

I was gon' be a grand papa. Wow. I don't know the first thing about babies. Guess I'll be the grandpapa who will play with the kid 'til he stinks. Ha.

My Jacqueline was going to miss this important event. That's all she ever wanted after our boys. She wanted a girl and we ended up with our sweet Rosebud instead. If it wasn't about us having more kids, she would constantly think of grand babies as our kids got older. She loved our little peach Charlotte. Ain't no doubt about this. Today, Jacqueline would've been the happiest she'd ever been. I don't doubt her. I'm filled with it.

I got our coffees and headed back to the waiting room where my lovely little doll would be waiting.

A Doctor appeared in front of me  
**"Oh hello. Are you Peter Whitlock Sr?"  
"Yes, that I am. You are?"**

We shook hands and he opened his mouth to explain.

**"I'm sorry, I'm Carlisle Cullen. I'm the doctor overseeing your daughter's pregnancy. She's doing fine. It'll be a little while. I just thought I would introduce myself since your son said you would be wandering around here."**

I stared him down. Something wasn't right with this gentleman.

He looks to be in his early 40's not a trace of wrinkling. Sunlight blond hair and dark soulless blue eyes. About 6 feet tall and too over cocky for a doc. Smile doesn't reach his eyes and his words seem forced, his lip twitches. Yeah.. Somethings amiss here.

**"Thanks Doctor. Appreciate it." **

**"I'll be sure to find you whenever I have a moment.." **his mouth twitched into a mischievous grin.** "If you'll excuse me."**

**"By all means."**

I stepped aside letting him through before continuing onto the waiting room.

What is with that doc? I've always been good at reading people and then thinking nothing of it.. Something about this really bothers me.

As I neared the waiting room. I saw those doe eyes staring at me, fear?Who is she talking to? It's a hospital why the hell is Bella afraid?

I walked up behind her, handing her a coffee. Her hand shook as she took it out of my hands.

Doctor Cullen? Why is she scared of him? Why is he grinning at her like this?

She looked at me, begging for a way out. I nodded. _Alright Doll face._

**"Why don't you call your sister. I forgot to let her know."**

**"Y…yeah. Okay." **I watched as she walked away.

**"It was good to see you again Isabella."**

She didn't even look back, good. She probably didn't hear him.

**"How do you know my kid there Doc?"  
"Your kid?" He's Confused.**

Good. If that sliver band on her ring finger says anything, it means she's my daughter. Not legally but who the hell cares really? She held a place in my heart the day we met. I knew she was to be in our family.  
**"Yes. She's family. Now, how do you know her?"  
****"She was once part of my family Mr. Whitlock. Can I call you Peter?"**  
I nodded.** "Yeah, doesn't seem happy to see you."  
"Oh, she blames me for not saving her father, I did the best I could."**

Now he's ashamed? The hell is going on here?**  
"Really?"  
"Yes. I think in a way she doesn't want to blame herself, so by blaming me, she can sleep a little easier at night."**

Did he really just say that? This doctor has really lost his marbles.

**"Excuse me, I'm being paged to your daughter's room."  
**He ran off before I could question him. He's a lucky son of a bitch.

I walked outside, hoping to get Bella's side of the story. Here goes nothing.

I found her on the bench.

**"Hey, what was that about?"  
**She leaned into me, crying. **"Hey, don't cry now honey. Your alright."  
"I.. know.. I just… I never.. I just thought.. I'd never see him again. I never.. Want to see him again, ever."**

**"You don't have to honey. What happened?"  
**She tried to control her breathing and rubbed her eyes, wiping them of every last tear.

**"I just, thought when I heard you mention Dr. Cullen over the phone that you were talking about his ex-wife. I thought wrong."**

She took another deep breath.

I tried to understand what she was saying, after all I am an older man.

**"I don't want to re-visit right now what happened. But, he's a horrible man. He's repulsive. Oh god. Peter. Charlotte. The baby. We have to get back in there."  
**  
She jumped off the bench with some power, pulling my arm trying to make he get up**  
"Hang on honey, what are you talking about?"** I grabbed her hand, trying to get her to sit down, it failed.  
**"Just come on. We have to tell Peter. He has to know. He doesn't know. Come on." **She tugged at me fearlessly like a 5 year old. It reminded me of Rosebud.

**"Please. Just trust me."**

**"Okay, quit begging, let's go."**

She dragged me through the hospital, nearly tripping over herself.

**"The room is down the hall 3rd door on the right honey." **I had to tell her before we went through every room in the damn place.

She burst through the door. Charlotte smiled at us, but that quickly faded.

**"What's wrong peach?" **Her voice concerned.

**"Peter. Its him. Its.."**

**"What's going on Dad?" **Before I could fill him in on our encounter Bella chimed in again.

**"Your doctor is.. That sick man."  
**Peter's eyes widened, his jaw clenched shut, hands balled into fists at his sides and his face started going red.

**"Son? What's wrong? What's this about the doctor being a sick man?" **I knew something was off about the doc. No doubt about that but, sick? I never got that from him.

**"Your sure?"  
"I swear Peter. I wouldn't have rushed in not even 5 minutes later after seeing him, Rose is coming, she's not pleased.. She told me to stay outside away from him."  
"Good. I can't believe that guy is that man. What the hell. You would never he was capable of it. We're getting a new doctor Babe. I don't give two shits what you fucking think." **

Using that language and ordering Charlotte around, hope he knows he'll get it later, idiot.

**"But.. Amour."  
"No." **

I watched as my son glared at his wife, making me want to whoop his ass. Bella chimed in-just in the nick of time, taking Peter's gaze off his wife  
**"I have Esme's number. She can do it. I know she can."  
"Esme?" **His eyebrow cocked.

**"Stop being angry. I'm fine, dad stopped our talk, thank god. Esme **_**was **_**his wife. She's helped me so much especially with Jonathan. Please." **She begged.  
**"Alright. Dad stay. Bells. Outside me and you."**

What the hell is all this crap?

Charlotte began filling me in, starting with a possessive, stalker boyfriend of Bella's and how he raped her when the door was busted open again.

**"I came as soon as she called. Dad." **A faint kiss touched my cheek. Rosebud.

**"Rosebud. Hi."**

**"Oh Charlotte. Finally, its about time you had that fucking kid."**

She kissed her forehead and dragged a chair next to me.

**"Is it true? I don't doubt Iz, but.." **I sure wish her and Bella could get along again.

**"Yes. It is. I can't believe we didn't put it together sooner. Peter always said there was something up with him"**

I nodded and let the girls chat. Allowing myself to "mm" and "ahh" every so often.

Preparing my hand every time poor Charlotte felt her contractions, unlucky for me, they were coming closer together.

* * *

**BPOV

I was freaking out. Never ever did I think I'd ever see Carlisle Cullen ever again. Edward and Alice possibly, seeing as though me and Esme had patched up our relationship and we would see each other. I guess I thought wrong. I wouldn't be able to go the rest of my life without seeing him. I freaked out really horribly. I know that. Let's face it, Carlisle Cullen is a horrible human being. He's not even Human to me. Who else would cover up their son's mental illness and obviously his sick need to make people feel pain? What Edward did to me was wrong. What Carlisle did was even worse.

**"Bella you can't storm in like that. Calm down. Its not like he'll try anything."  
"Then why did you fucking tell me to come outside with you, that we were going to change doctors?"  
"To get you outside, your acting irrationally. He's done nothing wrong to Char and I. Granted, I don't like him but he has been by the book the whole time with us."  
"You don't fucking know anything about him!"  
"And you do? All you fucking know is what he's done to you."  
"Yeah, I do. My opinion ranks higher than yours."  
"The hell it doesn't. Call your fucking doc, hurry it up. If you were anyone else but Jasper's girlfriend and Bella, I would've fucking thrown you out already and left you here alone." **

Yeah I was being irrational but he didn't have to be so damn cold.

Soon as I stepped outside my phone was already ringing.

**"Come on… Come on Esme.. Pick up!"**

After what seemed like hours she finally answered.

**"Hello Bella. I believe you've gotten me at a bad time.""Oh. Oh No.""Don't fret, what's wrong?"**

**"I ran into Carlisle, well more like he ran into me." **

**"Please don't say."  
"No. Look, he's the doctor who will be delivering a baby. Jasper's brother and his sister in law, to be exact."  
"This is hardly any alarm honey." **

**"Can you do it? I know it would make everyone more at ease."  
"I can't honey. I'm preparing a goodbye for my father today. Bella, there is no need to worry. Carlisle is a much better doctor than he is a person. Trust me. I know he's a horrible person but his skills in the medical world are by far the best, you don't have to worry. I'm sorry. Just trust me. I Love you."  
**_Click._

**"Well, are we fucking getting a new doctor?"  
"No."  
"Well, fucking come on then."  
**He grabbed my arm and I ripped it back from him**. "Don't you dare."  
"Whatever." **

He shrugged me off and walked ahead of me inside, leaving me to trail behind.

Why are all the Whitlock men all driven by their fucking tempers? They don't even think, they just go off.

I decided to give Peter his space, seeing as though I set him off. I took a seat in the waiting room, sitting next to Emmett. Picking up a newspaper and smacking him lightly with it. He smiled back. Sticking out his tounge.

**"Its alright Izzy. Don't get down about it."**

I nodded.

I began reading the paper but none of the words registered. I kept thinking about Jazz.

Great.  
Not even 10 hours after Jasper leaves and I make my most reliable ally hate me, I run into my worst nightmare-blast from the past.. And I cannot stop thinking that I should've gone with Jazz.. Separation does nothing for anyone.  
Screw the fuckers who think its good, it ain't. All its good for is making you miserable.

After about a few hours I guess I had fallen asleep. I awoke to both Rose and Emmett. Emmett was my pillow apparently and Rose was brushing the hair out of my face, greeting me with coffee.**  
"Hi. Thought you'd like to see the new addition? Sorry, We didn't have the heart to wake you when it was happening. Emmett wanted to wait to see with you." **

I took the coffee from Rose. **"Thanks. Rose. Em, you didn't have to."  
"No. I don't like the gunky looking babies thanks. I'd rather hold him squeaky clean."  
"Babies are dirty Em, you just wait 'til you become a Dad."  
"Yeah, Yeah." **

I looked at my watch, 6 hours since Jazz left. God.

I followed Emmett to the room, trying to make myself alert.

Here goes nothing, new baby and pissed it's father off moments before he/she was born. WooHoo!

* * *

**JPOV

14 fucking hours on a plane.. My watch reads 9 AM. Greeeeeeeeat. Reading over shit in an hour. I waited around for my bags and got the hell out of dodge.

Within 20 minutes of arriving, I got to my hotel, which was nice and spacious. Thank you Lord! I dropped my bags, turned around and locked my door.

Off to please the people paying for my new life.

I hopped into my awaiting vehicle. Black. Black. Black. The sun was shining down. God. You think being in a place like this, you wouldn't see much black because it attracts the sun, well apparently.. They aren't thinking clearly.. Well at least the people who I'm about to kiss ass.

I drifted off to sleep for a few moments, dreaming about home. The car stopped and the door was opened.

"**Fuck, care to warn a guy first. Damn"** I grabbed my shades, putting them on and getting out of the car.

I took a quick look around.. Yeah, heavy artillery men around. Fully suited up in protective gear, ak-47's strapped to their bodies, looking like the trigger is super glued to their hands. Shuddering, I head inside the beige building to meet people that I was suppose to assist these next three months. God, why did I agree to be taken away from my Family and my girl again?

I approached the table extending my hand and announcing to the room my name and place.

"**Ahh Yes, Mr. Whitlock. I'm Raeem Jarvis, I spoke with you over the phone.""Yes. I remember you. Its good to finally meet you.""As I you. Now, let's get down to business shall we?""Of course."**His arm directed me to a chair, I took it. Why the hell not?

He began going around the room introducing everyone and then started rambling about our building plans.

"**Now, we will start tomorrow morning with the building. I trust you have looked over the prints?""Yes. I was told the building wasn't going to begin for 10 days Mr. Jarvis.""No. You see, we need to complete the building as soon as possible." **

**"My documentation won't be here for another 10 days, as agreed." **

**"Yes, well.. I have provided one of my own. We must get started right away Mr. Whitlock.""I understand. I do need my own documents of this operation for my own insurance purposes." **

**"Unfortunately, we'll have to start without your man. Unless you decide to pay us our contract amount, the wages of the men outside protecting us all, the cost of delaying the permit and of course the cost of delaying this by a week to have you here. If you truly can't do this, write the check, sign this and leave."**

**"Our deal was to give me a few days for my documentation.""That wasn't our deal Mr. Whitlock. As to our signed agreement. It was to start and cease work on our terms."**

He chuckled. **"Didn't you **_**read**_** our agreements? Surely, you had your legal associates go over these papers with you? You being the Co-president of the company read these documents over many times, didn't you?"**

I know I read them over and over. That's all I did for hours, read and re-read every damn page before handing them off to Peter and the legal department before then again reading the damn thing another 5 times before signing, even then, weighing out my options.

One of the gentleman from behind me shoved a contract in my face. Cutting my thoughts out completely.

Jarvis began again, **"You'll notice on line 67a, 67b through to 70. It states that fact clearly." **

How could I have missed that? Its there in black and white. My signature is on the dotted line, I flipped through the pages. My signature was on every single fucking line. I read this over and over again. What The Fuck?!

**"Now, if you want to treat me like some common business man that you can manipulate, sign the paper and give me my money back. Mr Whitlock."**

He pushed the piece of paper towards me.

The amount?

6.5 Million dollars.

The downfall? My company goes bankrupt. I get a rep for being a pushy asshole.

The bright side? I get the hell out of here and back to my family. My girl. My new baby niece or nephew. I don't compromise my company without my own documents of everything happening here.

I started weighing my options.

Can I really sign this and walk away? Can I stay here and do this job like I signed in blood - well, pretty much. My name in ink isn't too far off.. Get the full amount and use that to give Bella and myself a new life?

Reaching into my pocket, I grabbed my pen..

_Alright. Looks like this is a done deal. Sign the dotted line, bring out the cheque book and go home Whitlock. _

* * *

_I know there are 3 POVS that come out in this . Just how the story was writing itself at the moment. This might be the longest chapter I've done, I think. _

_Enjoy! More to come soon! _

_REVIEW _

_REVIEW _

_REVIEW!_


	46. Day One

*I don't own twilight or these characters!*

- I wanted to make a really long chapter but I was already dying to post so, here's a little for you guys now.-

* * *

I set my pen down beside me.

"**When do we start?"**Jarvis smiled. **"The building will commence tomorrow"**

"**Alright. I'll begin my documentation now."**

"**Not a problem. I'll show you to the blueprints."**

I left the nice looking conference room and led down a long hallway into another conference room.

"**I hope you'll find everything to your expectations Mr. Whitlock. When you need to leave, let my associate Garrett know and he will lead you out, this will happen until the guards get used to you around. We don't need anyone to get hurt by the men protecting us upstairs do we? "**

Was that a silent threat? **"No sir. Thank you."**

I began looking through the plans, they all looked flawless, every last detail was the way it was suppose to be. I pulled out my laptop and began made my own copies, scanning them compiling them to email to Peter back at the office.

Pete,

_I'm attaching all files from here to you. We, currently have NO access to have our own documentation. I'm doing all this for now. Don't ask. Just.. Please go over the copy that's in your office, read it over and please tell me they've got the wrong copy. If not, then, we have NO documents to be recorded by anyone but myself. At this point, I've got to do it on my own, please inform Bella that she won't be coming out here to document this project and have her replace Jessica asap. I've been meaning to do it but, with everything.. You know._

_Any help you can provide me from over there would be great. Give everyone my love._

_Jay._

We were screwed. Peter'll flip his lid.. Bella will be pissed with me. What could I do? I can't just throw away my company and I cannot work without my own documents for insurance. Fuck Me.

I finished all the documentation I could, my watch now read 3:30 pm. Great. I spent the last 5 and ½ hours in here. I called for Garrett who walked me out of the building.

"**Mr. Whitlock. Mr. Jarvis has arranged for a car to come pick you up at 5:30 tomorrow morning.""Alright. Thank you."**I got into the car and let my mind drift off. I was suffering from a severe time difference, jet lag and weather that did a complete 180. I awoke soon as the car stopped in front of my hotel. I hopped out, thanking the driver and wasted no time getting to my room. I was dead tired.

The digital clock read 4:30 pm. I knew the current time zone made me 5 hours ahead. Bella would more than likely be at the office now, I can't call her. Damn. I decided to order some room service and watch some television, after the day I had.. Nothing would set me at ease, I just needed her.

I began to think what she would've been doing this morning.

She'd probably wake up groaning, not wanting to wake up. After letting the alarm clock go off about 6 times she'd finally stretch then stumble out of bed and into the shower where she would use up all the hot water but make the smell of strawberries waft into my bedroom. Mmmm.

She'd then throw on something that was clean and go downstairs to scrounge up something to eat, I wonder if it was strawberry jam on toast or if it was an apple..

She go towards the door and grab her keys, tripping over her shoes, that would always be in the same spot on the hard wood floor. Then of course she'd curse that she tripped over them and then throw them on with a scowl on her face.

I couldn't stop the smile that came to my face. God. I have her memorized to a T. Is that sad? Maybe, some people would find it weird or creepy having someone memorize your morning routine or any routine to every single detail.

I was brought out of my trace by a loud, annoying blaring noise. Shit! I fell asleep wondering about Bella's routine? Jeez. I've got it bad. But, I've always known it.

It was already quarter after 5.

Great.

Not only did I drift off and somehow NOT manage to wake up 20 minutes earlier, I missed being able to talk to my darlin angel.

I got up and shrugged out of my clothes, hopping into the shower. Wow. Nothing like a cold beginning to the day. I turned up the water and scrubbed myself quickly.

I hopped out wetter then rain in march and began brushing my teeth and drying myself off.

I dug through my luggage and put on my black pants, used for field work and a wife beater with a blue shirt. Good enough. I threw my toothbrush in the bathroom and grabbed my watch. Man, I'm good.

I made sure to grab my shades, wallet, phone and keys. I grabbed my trusty cow boy boots and my bag on my way out.

I flew down the creamy red hallway pressing for the elevator. I jumped into my boots and slid right into the elevator.

"**Hold those doors please!"**

Damn it. I was going to be late. I sighed in frustration and held the doors open. I really didn't want to be a dick today. Breathe Jazz.

"**Thanks so much."  
"Not a problem."**

I looked to the woman who I just held the doors for. She had long blond hair. She was putting on her heels, ha! Just like how I was not even 10 seconds ago.

She stood up straight and tied her blond hair back with a hair tie, pulling it into a nice tight bun. She gave me a smile. I smiled back.

The elevator finally hit ground floor and the doors popped open.

The two of us both gunning it for the door.

"**Sorry."** We both said instantly, I chuckled and motioned to her. **"Ladies first."  
"Thank you."**

She took off out the doors.

I managed to get out the front doors just as the car was pulling up. Thank god.

The driver got out and addressed me.

"**Good morning Master Whitlock."  
"Good morning good sir."**

I got in and began the drive to the compound.

I pulled my phone out and I had 4 missed calls. 3 from Bella and one from the ranch.

I began going through my voicemails.

_Hey cowboy, I hope you got in fine. I may have freaked out somewhat, [laughs] see, I cannot stay together without you. Anyways, please call me. I love you._

_I'm a little worried you haven't called me yet. I know you've landed since Peter gave me the secretary job. We really need to talk about this now, because, this.. Is.. It's just.. [sigh].. Call me back please Jasper. _

_Hi uncle whity, thought I'd let you know this kids got your left hook. [laughs] He just decked your father. I'll send you pictures soon. Everyone sends their love and get back soon. Oh, his name is David Hale and he needs to meet his number 1 uncle._

Oh Charlotte. Way to make me want to be there. Ha!

_Well, I guess your too busy. Which is what I'd figure would happen. I'll be at the ranch helping the family out and Peter's going to help me with the documents. Hurry up and get the hell home._

Yikes. Do I really want to call her now?

The car stopped and let me out. I noticed on site there were already trucks and workers.

I set off to headquarters to begin my 3 month sentence.

I looked over the blue prints, announcing to all the workers that I was in fact their boss but definitely their equal. I explained that all the work would be shared and no one would be left standing without anything to do. I even occasionally picking up some tools and doing the work myself. Anything to get this first stage done in the next 24 hours.

The cement was laid down and the beginnings of the support beams were being assembled, which I had to check both for quality purposes. Last thing I need is some idiot ruining production down the line by not getting the supports correctly put together.

The sun beamed down on us, I already had shed my dress shirt from earlier in the day. I was sweating like no other. It was unbelievable.

My wife beater was completely drenched in my sweat and my hair, well fuck, even tied back the sweat trailed down my neck, forehead and my back. It was satisfying having the beams of water hit some of my sore muscles, even if it was god damn annoying.

I was slightly out of shape. At least, with this type of work. My shoulders were screaming at me. Yeah, that's probably from not sleeping on a proper mattress. My back just freaking killed. Mental note, hit the hotel spa.

By 3'o clock I was called to the board room. Fuck, what did I do now? I quickly excused myself and used the rest room, splashing my face with cold water and ridding my face of sweat. I took off my wife beater and stuck it in my bag, wiping down my chest and back I put on my shirt and headed to the board room.

I walked in to be greeted with the same gentlemen from yesterday.

I took a seat, unpacking my laptop and gave my full attention to the men.

I began to get lost in translation..

She walked in.

The blond from this morning. What the hell?

"**Ahh. Mr Whitlock."**A voice brought me out of my thoughts.

I cleared by throat, **"Yes Mr. Jarvis?"**

"**This is our documentator Ms. Kate Johnson… Ms Johnson, this is Mr. Jasper Whitlock the associate that is looking over our project."**

"**Hello. Jasper.. Ahem. Mr. Whitlock. it's a pleasure to meet you.""You as well Ms Johnson."**

I extended my hand out to meet hers and shook it.

She smiled and I returned the gesture. Nice smile although she's a striking girl so that's a no brainier that her smile would be nice too.

"**Now, Mr Whitlock. Ms. Johnson will be available to you throughout your stay whenever you need her. She is from overseas as well."**

I nodded my understanding. I always thought they would've given me some old bag full of hatred person to document everything on their behalf. Fuck was I wrong.

She was about my age if that, tall, slender. Good healthy body.

My inner voice screamed loudly at my "inspection" of this gorgeous gammed woman who stood before me.

I escaped the meeting without running into her.

"**Mr. Whitlock, wait."**Fuck. I stopped dead in my tracks.

"**Here's my card so you can get in contact with me whenever you need to. I'll be happy to supply copies of anything and everything that is documented."** I began walking with her after stuffing the card in my pocket.**"Thank you, Ms. Johnson."  
"Please call me Kate."  
"You do the same, Ms… Kate"  
** I smiled. I was suppose to keep the whole professional Mr/Ms name calling but she did insist.

"**See you tomorrow Jasper.. Same time, same elevator?""Of course, gotta fight crime somehow."** I shrugged my shoulders.

She laughed and I opened the door for her, allowing her out first.

"**Thanks."**

She got into the black car and headed back to the hotel probably. I began conveying the site of what was already done. Not bad.

I noticed my driver waiting for me. I asked him his name and thanked him.

"**Home Tom!"  
"You got it boss."**

On the drive, he shared some things about his life. Turns out, he's got family overseas in Texas and was just here to make more money to give to his daughter who was having his first grandchild.

I shared that I just had a nephew and a love of my own. After this job was all over I planned on making her mine for the rest of my life.

Tom was a pretty cool guy. How do two southerners manage to be half way around the world from their families? Fucking money that drives the world.

Its kind of sad. Gotta work hard to earn enough money to live, have to sacrifice time away from those who matter the most to put a roof over your heads and give them the life you know they deserve. Too bad money makes the world go around. Whatever happened to love making the world go around?

What seemed like forever in the elevator, I finally got into my hotel room and crashed on my bed. My phone began ringing.

"**uh. You, hi?"  
"Nice to fucking talk to you too."**

"**Sorry Darlin. I'm tired and sore, the sun is kicking my ass… I'm 5 hours ahead. How are you?"**

"**Aside from pissed at this situation. I'm tired. I've been the caretaker the last 24 hours to your family."  
"Ah fuck hon. Don't do that. Take care of yourself."  
"I know. But, its Char. Its Dad. I know they don't need taking care of, but I like doing it. They appreciate it. Besides it takes my mind off things, it makes me feel normal. Caring about others. It feels like home."  
"Darlin, if you were here.. I'd feel at home. At ease."  
"Your just saying that because you need a body rub."**

I groaned while she laughed.

"**I'm not just saying that. A full body rub from you would be simply amazing.. But nothing matters to me if you aren't with me know that."**

"**I know. I just.."**

My heart felt like it was going to jump out of my chest, it beat so damn hard.

"**I wish.. This would've.. Worked out.."**

Her voice cracked out the heart began beating even faster.

I suddenly wondered if I was going to have a heart attack.

* * *

I know some of you are going to hate me! :) Stay tuned and like always,

REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!


	47. In the Dark

**Here's the continuation of Jasper's Pov. It's slightly longer I hope. ENJOY!*I don't own twilight or these characters!**

* * *

"**What.. What are you saying sweetheart?"  
"I'm talking about us being separated by a fucking ocean and a time difference for 3 months."**

My heart slowed to a steady rhythm.

"**I know hon. If I could do anything I would. I almost signed papers basically handing my company over just to get back to you, I knew you would kill me for it and my company is just it. Mine. I wasn't going to waste 6.5 million when I'd be gaining 3 million."  
"You almost signed away your company? Oh god. I'm glad you didn't. I'd rather be separated for 3 months. Its okay, this time apart will do us some good."**

"**I know. I Love you and Miss you just as much Darlin. When I get back its going to be just you and me, we're going somewhere alone. I promise."  
"I'll hold you to it… I'll let you sleep my cowboy. Call me when you aren't so drained."  
"No, I'm fine."  
"I can tell your exhausted. Just rest up and give me a call in a few days or we'll skype."  
"Okay. We'll skype at this time 2 days from now."  
"Okay. I Love you."  
"I Love you even more Darlin. Send my love and regards to everyone."  
"I will."  
**_Click._

So far, so good. I can't believe I was so freaked out. I knew in my heart nothing would've happened but for some reason it just felt like she was going to call it quits over us. I mean she's blind sided me before, but she wouldn't do it now.

I shook my head of all my thoughts and had a hot shower, letting the water beat down my back.. I could feel the slight pang of pain. Yeah, I'm going to be BURNED tomorrow. Fuck. I hopped into bed and welcomed sleep immediately.

The next morning came by too quickly. I rolled out of bed and my back tensed up. Great. This was going to be a good day. I took my time showering and got dressed heading out with 5 minutes to spare.

I brought a clean dress shirt with me so I could change if need be. I spent the first 10 hours working my ass off, replenishing my body and making sure I had enough sun screen on. I was already a lobster at this point, I wasn't about to give myself skin cancer from leaving my skin so exposed to the sun. At least I knew now I'd be working hard and getting real dirty.

My day ended at 4. Which was 11 hours in and out of the sun, holding a hammer, nail gun, directing cement and looking over blue prints.

Soon as I got into the car to take me home, I crashed on the cool black leather which felt so good on my red hot skin. Tom shook me gently when he parked in front of the Hotel.

"**Hey Mr. Whitlock, I think you'd be comfortable in your bed." **My eyes opened slowly and then closed tightly. God the sun was still so bright.

"**Yeah… yeah. Thanks Tom."**I felt around for my shades which had fallen off of my face and hopped out of the car, dragging my ass in through the lobby and to the elevator which would take me to my room.

Soon as I got there, I passed out.. Again.

**BPOV

The first week away from Jasper was pretty excruciating. I won't lie.

We did need the time apart and so far, it wasn't too bad, just sucked that everything reminded me of him. Even the Baby.

I loved living out at the ranch. Rose and I were there almost everyday. She did spend her nights with Emmett at their own house but she was there from dawn 'til dusk.

I began working at Jazz' and Peter's company, which was nice. I wasn't overworking myself and I loved the atmosphere. Besides, being with Peter everyday was a plus. I really loved him.

Only 2 months left until he's back home.

"**Everything alright doll?"** I smiled instantly. Its strange how tough that man was, and how fearless he was, he still could put a smile on your face.

"**Yeah, I'm fine. Hey, what are you doing up out of bed. You know your bed ridden for two more days."**Major had a mild stroke a week and ½ after Jazz left. Although since all these men are freaking stubborn, I had my hands full with this one.

"**Ahh. I'm fine sweet pea. I feel pretty good. Now, have you heard from my boy?"  
"No. Not since the 2****nd**** day we were apart."** I started feeling really awful. Why did I have to be reminded that he just forgot about me?  
**"I'm sorry. I'm sure he'll call soon honey. He's probably slaving away out there trying to get back to you as soon as possible. Don't fret."**

His strong arms wrapped around me, holding me tightly to his body.

My hands clenched tightly to his shirt, after a few minutes we parted.

"**How about you go find Charlotte and the little guy, I'll make us some sandwiches." **He smiled at me, again reminding me of Jazz.

"**No, I'll make them."  
"Honey, you've waited on me hand and foot.. Please. It's not rocket science. Its fine. If I feel any pain or discomfort, I'll stop, I promise."  
"Fine." **I huffed jokily. Letting the deep laughter jump start a small bit of all of the happiness and love that I've been missing for some time.

Little David was sleeping, taking his afternoon nap. I motioned to Charlotte to come eat so I wouldn't wake up the little guy.

"**Still no word?"  
"No. Its making me go a little crazy."  
"I'm sure he's just busy. Peter said he'd try to get a hold of him today."  
"Yeah. Well, I'm not holding out much luck."  
"Its Jasper honey. He'll call. "  
**We both walked into the kitchen, our arms linked. **"Where's Rosalie and why are you in here Papa? You're suppose to be bed ridden!"** She chastised Dad. I laughed.

"**I know, I'm fine. Jeez. Here's your damned lunch." **He smiled.

**We ate lunch and talked about the plans for little David. **

**Suddenly my phone rang. I jumped up and ran after it.**

"**Hello"** My heart was pounding in my chest. Thank god. He called.

"**Hiya Bells. Demetri's here at the office wondering about the Master's file, he's also got some questions."**

I felt my heart stop. **"Oh.. Um.. I'll come by in a sec"  
"Alright, see you soon."**

Fucking Peter.

I went to the office and was met with Demetri. I dug out my information regarding the file and sat down across from him.

"**What seems to be the problem D?"  
"I don't understand the docket is all."  
"What's confusing about it?"  
"Well, it says contracting from May 2006 until December of that same year." **I began firing off all the things that Peter had advised me on, I was brought up on all the current files at the office. You could say I was hired as a secretary but obviously Jasper had other plans for me then just answering phones.

I found out within the first week I started here. I started getting pulled into pre-meetings and actually sitting in high-priority meetings with Peter. His claims were, Jasper was his right hand and I was his left. He couldn't walk into meetings without some backup. Especially when some people tried to screw us out of money.

"**So, are you going to come out with us next month? It's my birthday and it's perfect timing since you guys won't be tied down"  
**"**I… I don't know D."  
"Aww, come on B. At least think about it will ya?"  
"Sure.. I'll think about it, Don't take it for a yes."  
"Alright. I'll see you on Monday."**

I nodded and went to Peter's office.

"**Hey. Sorry for doing that to you but It was important. He's attending the conference this weekend with me."  
"No. No. Its fine. So am I Bella-Daddy this weekend?" **His throaty laughter rang out in the room followed by a hacking cough,

"**Are you sure you should be going Pete? I mean, I'm sure I can go in your place. Demetri is pretty much a department head… or you can postpone it?"  
"I can't. This meeting is set in stone, its too late to postpone and it calls for 1 or both ceo's and since one Whitlock is across the ocean.. I've got to head it. Don't worry, You just be there for my girl and little man. I'll only be 48 hours."  
"Have you heard from him?"**

"No. I get updates from someone named Johnson."  
"Johnson?"  
"Yeah, they stated they would be sending the updates on his behalf. He had hard copies that he'll be bringing with him when he wraps. I don't know whats going on with him Bells. I'm getting really ticked off. He should've called us, he should've called you. At least you. If not the rest of us."  
"Believe me, I intend on finding out."  
"If you need him beat down.. You know how to find me honey."  
"Don't worry I will. Now let's go home."  
"I thought you'd never ask. Come on, my little man awaits."

**JPOV

I've never been so stupid and pissed off in my life. My phone's completely fried. I can't believe I left it in my pants. Between the heat and the fact I knocked it into a sink with water running.. I'm a fucking idiot.

Somehow my laptop got a virus and crashed completely. Great.

I lost my two lifelines to contact Bella and my family. Me being the stupid fucking idiot I never asked for a room with a phone that'll dial just more then concierge.

After about nearly a month of having no contact with her and being too damn exhausted to even do anything about it.. This was going to change.

Kate came over to my room after a long day to compare notes and make sure we were both on the same page.

"**Hey Kate. Do you mind if I keep your laptop tonight, my phone's fried and my laptop doesn't work. I really need to contact my loved ones."  
**She smiled at me. **"Of course. it's not a problem. If you need a phone, I've got one that dials out and will call overseas as well."  
"Thank you. Your amazing."  
"I know."  
"Cocky are we?"  
"Not as cocky as you Mr. 'I am your boss but I will out work and out perform you assholes on the job' Whitlock."  
"You're such a bitch"  
"and you're an ass. We're even."  
**I chuckled. **"Guess we are."**

That night I finally got on skype. This time Bella wasn't on.

_You know you're a fucking ass._

I was met with another pair of blue eyes, filled with fury.

_**Hello to you too Roz**_

_Don't hello me. What have you been doing? New girl?  
__**What are you talking about?  
**__We've had no word from you in a month. Your suppose to be.. I don't know fixing your relationship.. Remember the one you HAD with Izzy._

_**Had? What are you talking about?  
**__Not doing a good job of being a boyfriend. Its really sad how she's so loyal to you._

_**Wait, hang on. Why are you defending her?  
**__Because your being an ass._

_**Hey.. Not my fault. My laptop crashed and my phone is complete garbage, between the heat and me dropping it into the sink.. I have no communication. Besides, I'm doing above and beyond what I was paid to do just to come home faster, hence the dark tan and burns I'm walking around with now.  
**__No kidding. So Loaner computer?  
__**Sort of. Its another Americans. Actually they're my documentator, hey.. Can you do me a favor? Call Bella and tell her to get on, seeing as though I'm the idiot?  
**_she sighed_… fine. Still think you're a jerk for not telling us somehow, she's here I'll go get her_

_**I love you.**_

_Hate you_ she said with a smile.

_Then my wonderful pair of brown eyes filled the screen._

_**Hey Darlin**_

_Hi._

_**Did Roz tell you?  
**__No, said it was for you to explain._

I went through my stories, explaining to her what happened and why I wasn't able to contact her until now.

_**Who did you get to document everything anyways?  
**__Another American actually. _

_**Really? Are they nice?  
**__Yeah, real nice. Even lent me their laptop so I could finally contact you._

_**I don't like this not knowing anything Jasper. Its not good. Especially when we're suppose to deal and work out this little thing called our relationship that has pretty much withered away into nothing.**_

_Don't say that. Its not nothing. Its everything._

_**Then you would've done a better job at contacting me. I understand this job is gruelling and all.. But Do you EVER think about me anymore?  
**__I think about you all the time Darlin.. Much too much. _

_**Well.. You should've contacted me right away to let me know. You had a fucking worker contact peter, still no explanation even to him, your business partner who is also your brother but still, a quick email while you were in another building, because you do have internet there.. Just to say 'hey, I fucked up.. I ruined my phone and laptop and will be without communication for a while' I mean come on Jasper. I'm not a fucking dog you can leave alone for a while and when you come home, I'll be happy and jumping up and down to greet you.. Not when you leave me in the dark like this.**_

I just sat there, letting her lip me, she needed to get it out and I'll be honest. It was my fault.

_**I'm sick of this. We can't talk, we can't see each other, your half way around the world and I'm just fucking here trying to figure US out without YOU to help me.**_

_Would it make it better if I said I'll be home real soon?  
__**Real soon? How soon? In 2 months? So no communication for the next two months?  
**__No.. but.. I'll figure something out.. I promise.  
__**I'm sick of your promises.. All you do is promise and swear and make me believe.. And then you let me down. I'll believe it when I see it Whitlock.**_

Then she signed out of Roz' account. Fuck. Since when does she call me Whitlock? Have I really let her down that much? I didn't realize how pissed she could've been, Our relationship was important to me.. It seems fate just hates me all over again.

I kept working and sending her little emails whenever I could. I tried calling and all I got was her voicemail. I slowly started realizing after the days were passing by, just how in the dark she must've felt by me. I got really aggravated by the 4th day, I couldn't stand it anymore. I don't know how she dealt with it.

Back to the drawing board Whitlock.

I focused all my energy and anger into the project, trying, willing it to hurry the hell on.

***BPOV

The weeks started to pass again, I was going through the motions, work, helping the family and even going out with Angela again.

He started calling every day after 1pm but, I wasn't about to give into him. He had to know how it felt not to be replied to. Granted, yes he had good reasons but, still.. There was an alternative, like using the computer for a second at the corporate building there and he didn't.

I felt really horrible about doing this to him, I really shouldn't its hindering our relationship, but he just had to know how it felt… to feel like you didn't matter…

like you were that puppy that was left alone for so long but when you finally come back to it, it greets you like you never left.

Not me.

It may seem like I'm being a bitch, but I am not something that can sit around with nothing to go on for weeks. Fuck that

I went to the office like usual and the phone rang, Peter grabbed it before me and then handed it to me.

"**Talk to him." **He mouthed

I rolled my eyes and took the phone from him.

"**Bella speaking."  
"Darlin, I'm sorry. I get it. Point proven."  
"Yeah, see you in another month"**

I put the phone down on the receiver.

"**Bells..""Don't do it."** Tears were threatening to rain down my face. I couldn't let my aching heart and tears crush my resolve now. I just couldn't.

"**Will you both stop this game of, 'I'm chasing you, now I'm angry fuck you' bullshit? I'm tired of constantly having to deal with the two of you. Which isn't easy."  
"I don't care. You don't have to deal with me"  
"But I do. I care about you, your family and you work here. Just… I don't understand why the two of you let shit get in the way."**

"He's always got something that's in the way."  
"Remember, both of your pasts, the emotional and physical scars from that, and then the scars you've endured together and apart since you've been together. Its not easy, granted. But at the end of the day, you love him and he sure as hell loves you even more, why let this one thing cause more tension between you?"

I began to lose it. **"Let's see.. I haven't forgotten the fact he almost got too carried away with Edward's sister and he's neglected me when he said he wouldn't For all we know he could've been screwing some hot leggy red head over there or something."**

I raised my hand and poked him in the chest and the flood gates opened.

"**If you weren't expecting a child, it was going to be you over there not him. If that little boy at home wasn't here.. Jasper would be here with me, dealing with Jonathan and sorting out everything that's caused such a mess."  
"I know. Tell you what, anything that comes up when he gets back for the next little while I'll take."  
"You can't.."  
**

**"Ah. Stop. I know your feeling guilty now but, its part of the job."  
"Sometimes I wish I could beat you to a pulp."  
"Ha! You couldn't if you tried. Now quit those tears and go home and get ready to go out. D's party is tonight and you're Charlotte's date."** He winked.

I decided to listen to him. I left the office feeling a little less heavy then when I showed up this morning. I'll be giving Jasper what I'm feeling when he gets back. Why? Why did we have to part at the worst time in our relationship?

I went back to the ranch, heading up to Charlotte's room.

"**So, I'm told I'm your date?"  
"Yes. Come on honey. We're going to look amazing. I'll take pictures so Jasper's going to regret not being here.. That'll show him."  
"Compared to you, I won't look that great."  
"Oh shush peach. I wish I had your body and face. Your too gorgeous. Besides, we'll all knock them dead."  
"Who else.."**

"Hi Iz. I know we haven't gotten along or made up about the whole.."  
"It's forgotten Rose."  
I didn't actually forget about it, I'm not trusting her wholeheartedly for a while but.. I couldn't let my past with her good or bad ruin this night. Charlotte's first night away from baby Dave.

"**So Rose, think you can handle hair while I do makeup?"  
"Guys, don't you…"  
"Shut up Swan. Your going to be made up and dressed. So just sit here and relax… please?"  
"Fine, but you guys pay for everything tonight."  
"You can be such a bitch sometimes Swan."**

We all giggled at each other and the two of them went to work.

Rose left my hair down with some curls in it. It looked really good.

My makeup wasn't heavy at all. Some foundation to even out the dark bags under my eyes and the rest of my face, smokey eyes, some pink lip gloss and mascara.

They stuck me in a cut up wife beater that was cut too much at the top, making my breasts almost spill over and then it was cut an inch below my breasts. Showing off my tight stomach and abs. It was paired off with some cute pumps and black short shorts which made my legs look good. God. They were really trying to sex me up. Too bad Jazz isn't here, he's missing quite a sight.

Charlotte went for a black mini skirt and deep v neck shirt. Her strawberry blonde hair half up and the rest in very loose ringlets. She looked gorgeous. No doubt her and Peter would be baby making tonight.

Rose hopped into a tight grey number that had a plunging neck line, almost making her breasts pop out, it was cut with a slit and the entire dress itself stopped 2 inches before her butt. her hair left down and flowing.

We looked like complete show stoppers.

The guys showed up within 45 minutes before we had to leave.

They all dressed in dress shirts and jeans. Looking like models. It was ridiculous.

Peter had his blond hair slightly falling into his eyes, taking on Jasper's trademark messy hair. His blue eyes taking on a light blue colour then his usual dark blues. He was clean-shaven.

Emmett had his dark hair and his hazel eyes, a little scruffy and his face a little flustered. He was anxious to go out and have some fun. The excitement couldn't be wiped off his face. Still like a kid. All these years.

Demetri had his frosted brown hair, styled to perfection. All spiked up, he looked great. He had dark green eyes with his smile glittering the room. Just like Peter he was clean shaven.

We all booked a hotel room prior to this evening so we all headed to the hotel room to pre- drink.

"**Dayum. We have to get out more often. You ladies took too damn good to even go out"  
"Peter. You can't sleep with all of us."  
"Well, I can minus Rose."**

_WHACK_

"**Hey! I wasn't finished. But I'd rather just sleep with the only one that matters to me." **my turn. _WHACK_.

"**Hey!"  
"Thanks. I don't matter."**

Peter looked so scared. It was quite funny. We began laughing.. Poor Pete. We always put him through crap.

I opened my bottle of Tequila, trying to forget that almost everyone save Demetri and I were coupled up, he sat beside me as I began taking shots.

"**I know we're both spoken for.. But I figure, I'll need a dance partner and so will you and we'll both be pussy and cock blocks for each other. Sound good?"  
"Sure. Thanks Demetri"  
"For what?"  
**"**Being my fill in dance partner."  
"Anytime."**

After about an hour of pre-drinking we all walked to the club, Demetri got us all in VIP, we didn't have to pay a damn thing, thank god.

Shortly after getting in, Rose bought us a round of shots and Peter bought a bottle of tequila. Oh yay. I'm going to be fucked.

We all started shooting and drinking from the bottle.

After a while, we all began to feel the booze. I sat across from Charlotte who eyed me and then sat beside me. She grabbed the 2nd bottle of tequlia and poured it on her collar bone, putting salt on her neck and a lemon wedge in her mouth. **"I dare you bitch"**

Dare me? I licked it off her with no problem at all then took the lemon out of her mouth.

"**Bellsy got some experimentation in her belt."  
"You wouldn't know what to do if you got my Belt off Pete."  
"Is that an invite?"  
"No. You aren't pretty enough, besides I'd much rather your..."**

"**Bella, let's dance."**Before I could get another word in Demetri ripped me from the booth and to the dance floor, he began spinning me around and I couldn't stop smiling and laughing, He was pretty drunk and was able to send me flying around the dance floor.

Pretty soon Charlotte cut in and we began dancing, grinding on each other and just having a good time. Rose never left Emmett's side. He gets a little too jealous for his own good.

Peter soon cut in and had me dancing for what felt like hours.

Then he spun me out and I ended up in a different pair of arms.

I looked up and stepped back, wide-eyed, my heart beat in terror. The blood felt like it was rushing out of my head.

I couldn't believe this was happening.

"**What the hell are you doing here?"**


	48. Bottles

*I do not own these characters or twilight.*

Here's an Easter present. The next chapter was meant to be in here as well, but.. I decided to change it at the last minute.. review away.. need more then just a couple reviews before I even post the next chapter. All my faithful readers and the ones who do review this story. Thank you.

[continuing from Bella's Pov]

* * *

Those familiar eyes staring back at me, burning a hole into my head. He stepped forward and I stepped backwards. Finally his long arms shot out instantly and pulled my body towards his. I put my hands in front of me, trying to push him away. His fingers linked through my belt loops on the shorts and grabbed my hips as his lips crept to my ears. "**Please, pretend you love me tonight Darlin.. If not for me, for Demetri and everyone else. You can hate me in the morning babe."**

He kissed my earlobe and I huffed. I shot him a dirty look as he leaned in, I turned my face away and whispered in his ear.  
"**I'll play nice but I'm beyond furious with you."**

He relinquished his hold on my hips and I was able to walk back to the booth, his hand was on my lower back, walking with me. I tried to ignore the severe jolts of electricity his touch always gives me. It was excruciating.

I gave Rose a look and she fell in line, flanking my right side. When I finally made it back to the booth I stepped in, pulling Rose with me. I watched as Jasper's eyebrows furrowed and a slight frown played on his face. He just turned around and headed towards the bar, grabbing Emmett on his way.  
"**Let him sit with you at least."  
"Why is he even here? He's suppose to be gone for another fucking month."  
**"**Just be happy he's here early. Its what you wanted right?"  
"Yeah.. I'm just pissed with him."  
**"**Have a drink and relax, just forget for a moment that your angry and just enjoy the fact he's back and here. Have angry sex and then in the morning, beat the hell out of him…Its what I do with Emmett. It works wonders, that and makeup sex." **She laughed.

I grabbed the remainder of the tequilas bottle on the table, which looked to be about 3 shots and drank it.. I tried to just listen to Rose, letting the music take my head on a bit of a ride. The dance floor became packed with people dancing to Ke$ha's "Tic Tok" began blaring. I just sat up dancing in the booth. Charlotte came over, leaving Peter in the crazy crowd and jumped onto the table, pulling me with her.

***JPOV

I woke up as usual. Mentally cursing myself for being incommunicado. Hopefully Bella will forgive me when I go home in 30 days! 30 Days! My heart began to speed up as I proceeded to get dressed. I hopped into the black vehicle like usual, this time sharing with Kate what's the point of having two cars that were going to the same place?

Kate was dressed to the nines as usual. Nice attire all around. She gave me a once over and handed me some dry cleaning.

"**We've got a meeting Jay. You shouldn't go dressed like that to it. Just sneak and change when we get there. I'll stall." **She nervously smiled. I set my hand on hers which was resting on her knee. Giving her a light squeeze.

"**What's got you so nervous sweetheart?"**

"**I don't know. I just don't think this'll be a good thing."  
"I'm sure it'll be fine, if not you can always let down your long hair and throw it around trying to be all sexy like. They'll surely give into your every whim."  
**She playfully hit me as I laughed the rest of the way to the office."**Just because I did it once because we were working so long, doesn't mean I'll do it to save our jobs. You jackass."  
**I began laughing even harder.. She wouldn't say another word to me.

We pulled up to the building and I whisked my way inside changing quickly and tossing my other clothes to Tom who stuck around waiting. Kate sat outside of the conference room waiting for me. I lent my hand to her, helping her up and rubbed her back. **"Just stay calm. You're going to be fine."  
"I hope your right." **I allowed her inside first before walking in myself.

My stomach twisted into knots. Every single Department head here and even government officials were here.

"**Good morning, Ms. Johnson… Mr. Whitlock."  
"Good morning sir."**We took our seats, she sat beside me, her hands folded in her lap, I noticed her knees shaking.  
I tried to keep my breathing normal. God. I was too nervous now. Kate was rubbing off on me.

What I thought was a normal meeting wasn't. Jarvis spoke, **"We have to cut our project short. The militia are providing to be too much of a problem for the armies, we cannot guarantee your safety here." **My heart began speeding up. I began fighting back my anxiety that was threatening to make me lose my mask of cool-calm-collective. Fuck. Basically, I was going to die and Bella was going to suffer with losing me.

A government official stepped up, **"However, we do have some options.. You can fly home today or stay in protective care behind our lines at the consulate."**

I looked to Kate, she blinked once and nodded.

"**Mr. Jarvis, don't take this the wrong way but I think I speak for both Ms. Johnson and myself when I say, we'd rather take the flight home today."**He wasn't pleased.

"**As soon as this is all resolved, I'm sure Mr. Whitlock and myself will fly right back here and finish out the 30 days we have on contract."** Kate spoke up.

The meeting wrapped and we headed back to the hotel. I used Kate's cell to arrange tickets- hopping on a red eye and then packed all my stuff and headed to the airport.  
"**When we get back, I'll pay you for this."  
"No. Its quite alright."  
"No. I'm paying you back mister." **I smiled and we went through security measures. Finally we got on the plane about an hour later.. 15 minutes after take off I called Peter.

"**Hello. Peter Whitlock speaking"  
"Petey.. I'm heading home.. Is Bella in?"  
"Yes."  
"Can I speak to her?"  
"Ah… I don't think that's a good idea bud."  
"**_**Just put her on the fucking phone**_**." **I spat quietly.  
"**Bella speaking."** How nice it was to hear her voice.  
**"Darlin, I'm sorry. I get it. Point proven."  
"Yeah, see you in another month"  
**The Line disconnected.

My heart fell. Fuck, I should've listened to Peter. I felt discouraged. I fucked up. She was really pissed at me.I spent the rest of the flight feeling really low. I haven't felt like this since mama died. I started an inner war with myself. I started thinking of how I could repair my fuck up, how I could make it up to her.. Anything to get out of this mess.

I ended up calling back within the hour.  
"**Jay. What's going on?"  
"Long story short, I'm on my way home. Flying in on a red eye so I should be there in about half the time"  
"I see. Well, It'll be good to see you. Demetri's birthday bash is happening tonight.. Our usual spot."  
"Am I..?"  
"Yes. Yes. Yes and Yes. Dad's been batting for you. I think he's been failing slightly. You've got some ground to make up."  
"I know."  
"You aren't her favourite person right now. As much as I think you deserve it, then again, you don't. Shit got out of hand, it was messed up but.. You can fix it."  
"I fucking hope so. I'll see you tonight Pete."  
"Yessir."  
**_click_

I dosed off the rest of the flight, waking up to Kate shaking me violently.

"**Jasper. Wake up."**My eyes shot open and I stood up.  
"**Sorry."  
"It's fine. Come on. Car's waiting" **I made sure the driver dropped her off first, rolling down the window I called to her.

"**Hey, drop by my office on Monday. I don't care when- we need to sort out what we've compiled."  
"Sure. See you then. Thanks again."  
"No problem. Stay out of trouble."**I headed home to shower and change. I walked in the door listening to a baby wailing.  
"**Hello? Anyone home?"  
"Why hello son."  
"Major. Can you handle that little one?"  
"Perfectly. He's got the lungs of his mother but the obedience of his father."**I stepped forward to take the little guy in. Dad handed him off to me and I finally looked at this little bundle of joy. He had the blue eyes we had, Charlotte's perfect bone structure- or so it would look like underneath all the baby fat. The Whitlock grin was plastered on the little man's face.

He was a beautiful son of a gun.  
He was going to be breaking hearts soon. I kissed his forehead and watched his eyes close.

"**Here Papa. I got something for him." **I handed the little heart breaker off and dug around in my bag. **"What do you think?"**  
**"I think your rushing into this for him."** he laughed.

I picked up a little cowboy hat for David, it was dark brown with a little string on it.

"**No way. I'm ordering him boots too. He's going to have to earn his keep around here too. Ain't no way, I'm doing those fields 10 years time without this little guy's help. God knows his daddy's too damn lazy to do it."  
**He chuckled **"Now now, time for a baby to be a baby…. What are you doing here?"  
"Got back early. Going to Demetri's bash and hopefully get back in good graces with my girl."**

"**You'll be fine. She's like your mama. Couldn't stay mad at anyone long enough. She loved too much. Just let her be angry and scream, hit, throw things, whatever she has to do to get that anger out and you'll be okay."  
"Right. Well, I'll probably see you in the morn. Have a good time with your grand baby."  
"I shall. Good luck son." **I showered quickly and put on fresh jeans and a buttoned shirt, my hair was just left as is and I headed off to the club.

I got in without a problem. Thankfully, Peter remembered to stick me on the guest list. Soon as I walked in, the smoke, music and drunk people screaming were attacking my senses. I headed to the bar first for a drink, I was too nervous, to say the least. I shouldn't be, its my family, my girl. Please god, don't smite me too much.

I ordered a beer and looked towards the dance floor as I chugged half of it.

That's when I saw her. Her brown hair shining underneath the dim, awful coloured lights. She was smiling, her face twitching while she laughed. She looked so happy, so carefree. I finished my beer leaving it on the bar and made my way through the crowd to her.

"**Why, hello sexy" **A red head stopped me. She stumbled somewhat.  
"**Hello. Why don't you see to my man right here?"** I handed her off to another drunk guy. Not my problem.

After nearly getting knocked over by a heavy set guy, I made it over to where everyone was. By this time, Peter had her. I nodded to him and he winked. He spun her around in circles, bringing her close for a hug before spinning her out again, letting her go, he was giving me an in. Which I wanted.  
She crashed into me. My nerves died instantly. She looked up, my eyes meeting her wonderful brown eyes. She was frightened. She pulled away from me instantly. I was confused, the expression on her face was miles away from what she just felt. She was sad, hurt.

"**What the hell are you doing here"** she sneered.  
Ouch. I pulled her body to mine, trying to will the thought of me actually putting her through pain out of my head. She tried pushing me away, I wasn't about to let her do that. I grabbed her hips and pulled her closer, trying to stop her from completely flipping out on me. Something. Anything.

"**Please, pretend you love me tonight Darlin.. If not for me, for Demetri and everyone else. You can hate me in the morning babe." **I kissed her sweet ear, I leaned in to kiss her sweet lips which earned me a dirty look and she denied me access. She's never done that before.. "**I'll play nice but I'm beyond furious with you."**

I let her go. She won this time, but I can't be handling all the blame and hate sweetheart.

I kept my hand on her, she flinched when I touched her. I tried to ignore her movements and relished in how much electricity was lighting up my body. It felt like the heat in July, making the last two months feel like a -55 degree blizzard in December. I expected to sit with her and was wrong. Rose sat with her, giving me an apologitic look, I grabbed Emmett by the shoulder and took him to the bar.

"**Oww. Jasper, let me go. Ow"  
"Sorry man."  
"Fuck, you ever grab me like that again and I'll give you a black eye. Fuck that hurt."  
"I'm sorry."  
"Quit getting angry. The two of you are a god damn atomic bomb waiting to deploy. Do me a favour, warn me so I can be miles away from you two fighting."  
**"**What do I do Em?"**

"**Have angry sex, scream, yell, beat the hell out of each other, have make up sex and never do that again. Tell her she's right and that you'll spend forever making it up to her.. "** He put back some of his beer and looked behind him before continuing. **"Except you actually have to make it up to her 've got a stubborn woman there. She's pissed but you have to remember, she's grieving too and did most of it without you."  
"I know. I grieved too on top of working myself to the bone so I could get here faster."  
"Let her be angry, but tonight.. We drink! So get that look off your face, let's order some bottles, Izzy likes that tequila tonight and we'll get some whiskey just to make it interesting.. Hey, there's Pete. Go on" **he shoved me towards the direction of where my brother was..** "bottles, here. Now go."**I approached Peter, his jaw tight and face was stone. **"What's up Pete"  
"That. Come on."  
**I looked over to see both Bella and Char, dirty dancing on our table and looks like some fuckers were going to try and "rescue" them.  
We ran to the table, I set the bottles down and grabbed Bella, her body flew into my arms. I set her down and pushed her into the booth making her be on the inside, I sat beside her.

She began snapping at me like she did. She was like a damn angry dog. Damn it.

"**I'm not, I'm just not into sharing my girl is all."** I smiled into her neck, leaving a kiss in its wake.

* * *

**BPOV

Our dance didn't last too long. Pretty soon a crowd began forming around our booth and before we could even give anyone a show both Peter and Jasper yanked us off the table and we were seated in the booth. Great. Party poopers.

"**You know you wouldn't be such an ass if you had a few drinks."  
"I'd prefer it if you didn't show the whole place anything."  
"Oh shut up and drink something, Your really uptight you know?"  
**"**I'm not, I'm just not into sharing my girl is all."** I could feel his sexy smirk on my neck.  
**"Well, too late for that. Charlotte here, has her own claim to me." **I giggled.

Grabbing my bottle of poison of the table clinking bottles with Charlotte and taking a long swig.

"**You know you both loved the show. Let's do another one but on the dance floor" **The two boys were shaking their heads. I looked to charlotte, eyeing my bottle and then hers..  
"**Fine, come on sexy mama. Boys, hold our bottles."**Charlotte's hand was in my hair and mine had her at her hip, we were going to dance, with or without them.. We didn't even get 5 feet from the table before the boys caught us, heading to the dance floor.

One dance song ended and Rihanna's "Hard" came on. Perfect song for how the boys were feeling. I felt myself falling more wasted, damn those bottles. I couldn't help myself. I felt Jasper's very prominent erection on my butt and I couldn't help but feel a little turned on myself. I turned around to face him and was dazzled with the sight before me. It was like I didn't get a good look at him earlier. Which I didn't…

His arms were sporting a dark tan, sweat dripped down his face, his golden locks were falling into his face, a little devilish smirk danced upon his plump lips, his eyes locking mine in an instant.

The moment was quickly ruined by Emmett who drunkenly walked in the middle of our embrace to pick me up and walk me back to the table. He ignored my protests and I just yelled for Jasper.

"**Hi Izzy Bizzy. Soooo, ya ready for another round?"** he shouted in my ear.  
"**I think I'm done."  
"No.. your still drinking with me. Please.."  
**Ugh. Those stupid puppy dog eyes. **"Fine"  
**He began pouring shots for him and myself. Jasper sat himself next to me, just smirking away, **"Emmett. Leave some for me there."  
"Will do Whity, will do."  
**The four of us drank. Demetri joined in.  
Peter, Charlotte and Rosalie just sat back and watched us bicker.

* * *

***PPOV

It was only about 1:30 in the morning and my buzz was wearing off. I had daddy duty in about 6 hours. I wasn't going to be an idiot and get shit wrecked. I laughed and chatted with the drunken messes across the table from me, it was quite funny.

Bella leaned over to Jasper, placing her hand on his leg, he was no longer chatting to Demetri, that's for sure. His eyes were slanted and glossed over, yeah.. He's going to have a mean morning after he sleeps this when I thought I'd actually feel a little bad about his hangover he went and became the stupid drunk fuck. **"Why hello Darlin.. Fancy seein' you here.."**

I began laughing, did he really just think she got here? Wow. He's really gone. When I finally calmed down, my amour cocked an eyebrow at me and I just shook my head. I leaned across the black table, **"I think its time to stop with the bottles.." **I was yelled at immediately by the drunken twosome. **"Touch the bottles and you'll lose an eye!" **All of us laughed, aside from Bella and Jasper who were looking at each other and smiling, he finally leaned in and got the kiss he was trying to get all night.

God, sometimes, these two remind me of Emmett and Roz.  
"**Okay time to go home before Jay sleeps on the table."  
"Peteeeeeyyyy"** Bella whined. Yeah, I just cock blocked you. I don't care.

"**Bells, the club is closing… right Char? Come on."  
"Yeah.. Peter's right. We'll continue this at home okay?"** She jabbed me in the side. I gave her a look and she shook her head.

We finally got the two of the out of the club. Demetri could still stand and walk pretty good, thankfully he was pacing himself until the last half hour of shots happened. Emmett was leaning on Roz. She could handle him, walking right into a cab. I shipped Jasper in with them, telling them to go to the ranch.

"**Noo. Jazzzzy."  
"You'll see him at home Bells."  
"I wanna go with him. Please…"  
"There's no room in that cab honey."** Her puppy dog eyes were killing me  
"**I'll take D, you take those two back, I don't need Whitlock here rambling to me the whole way back when I've got Emmett singing."  
"Thank you Rose"** Bella jumped in the cab to hug her, then got out and wrapped her arms protectively around Jay.

"**Eyyyy Darlin'"** He was a smiling fool at this point. His eyes never left Bella. Her arms never moved from his torso, which I'm sure she was bruising him by now.  
"**Mm.. my cowboy." **After about 10 mintues of trying to tear Bella's arms from Jay long enough to get into the small yellow cab, we were off.

"**We should've separated them."** Char scoffed.  
"**Its alright honey. We'll have our own time when we get back."  
**We didn't think this one through. Charlotte had gotten in first, trying to wrangle my very drunk brother in the cab while I was trying to peel Bella off of him. God, for someone who hated someone so much, she really tried her hardest to not let him go. They got to sit together while Charlotte was on one side of them and I was on another. We got to sit happily while the two of them chatted quietly and stole kisses.

"**I'll just be glad when these two stop being furious and hurting each other.."  
"I know honey. Just close your eyes and relax."**  
I couldn't have Charlotte worrying about these two. She always would. She sees Jay as her own brother and Bella like a sister.

I closed my eyes hoping it would make this cramped car ride end faster. I could feel my legs getting cramped, it was also affecting my back, I couldn't sit up straight because I was too tall to. I was hunched in this seat with not much room to even stretch for a second.

"**You know I love you right?"  
"Of course. I love you even more honey."  
"I'm sorry for being angry with you."  
"I'm sorry I was an ass. I love you."  
"Let's not do this again."  
"Agreed darlin"  
**I smiled at their little conversation. They could be normal when drunk but when they were sober, Jay bit his tongue and she would blow her top. It never seemed to work when they fought, they were both strong people who were very stubborn and hell bent on getting their way… at the same time.

We finally arrived at the ranch. Dad was on the porch, standing there with both hands on his hips.  
"**Do y'all realize what time it is? Y'all done woke up my little leaguer"**

"**Sorry Daddy." **Bella stumbled forward, Jay's arms shot out to catch her just as I was about to move forward and do it myself, bring her back to his chest and clutching at her tightly, smiling into her skin. **"But Jasper and I didn't want to waste our bottles, you know they don't let us take them home.. Then Peter wouldn't let me hold Jasper when we got into the taxi and then the ride was so long and can you believe we had to whisper in the taxi?"**

Dad cracked a smile, chuckling even at Bella's little ramble. "**Alright doll. Go to bed honey. Jasper take her in." **Jasper just walked forward leaning on Bella and nodding to Dad. I paid the driver and took my amour's hand, the 4 of us walked on up the porch where Dad finally got a look on Jay.

"**What the hell boy? How are you still standing?"  
"This sweet little thing here.. Darlins doin a good job of keeping' this man up aren't you honey?"  
"Yes I am." **They stole another kiss and I just pushed them on inside, leaving Charlotte with my father.

"**Need help Pete?"** Roz appeared from the kitchen taking in my apparent situation. Jay on one side, Bells on the other.  
**"Yeah Roz, grab Bells. I don't need her falling down while I'm trying to keep this one up."**

Jay jumped on my back, like a child. **"Wooo.. Yeah Peteyyy.. Run horsey run!" **He began laughing loudly and like a child. I started my way upstairs with the brand new 5 year old who was jumping forward and backwards on my back, trying to ride me like a horse. I couldn't make it up the stairs fast enough, my back was screaming in pain. He weighed a lot more then my back could handle, especially when he was drunk.

I dropped him off in his room. He grabbed my arm, pulling me in a hug, **"Thanks Petey."  
"Yeah yeah. Get in bed you fool." **Roz came up with Bells once the two of us weren't taking up the stairs. She handed her to Jay, I closed the door and turned to Roz. Her makeup was washed off, there were bags under her eyes. I gave her a hug and went to my room.

I opened the door, being met with the sight of my sleeping wife. Her beautiful long blond hair was spread over her pillow. Her face was the epitome of serene, her eyes closed. I undressed quickly and carefully got into bed.. I really didn't want to wake her, she hasn't had a full night of sleep yet.  
"**I love you mi amour."  
"I love you too mi amour."  
**I gave her a gentle kiss and slowly drifted to sleep.

I awoke to a scream, **"Peter.. Help me, please. Oh my god. Peter"**

Fuck. I hopped out quickly, throwing on a pair of PJ's and heading towards the screams. Charlotte was hot on my heels.

I tried the doorknob and it was locked.  
"**Mind letting me in?"** Like asking would work. **"What's going on?"  
**"**Jazz is on me, he won't get off, I can't get him off."  
**"**I can't get in sweetheart."  
"Oh my god. Just kick the fucking door in, please."** She begged.  
Great. _Sorry Jay._ I thought as I booted the door in. I crossed the room and lifted Jay off little Bells. She flew out the door and Jay woke up and started swinging at me.  
"**The fuck Petey..the fuck are you doin'?"** His eyes shot open, blue and bloodshot, still glossed over. Yeah, he was still drunk.  
"**Relax buddy. You wouldn't get off Bells. She begged me to come in here."**

I placed Jasper back on his bed. Bella appeared back in the room.  
"**Bells. He's still drunk."  
"Peter, go away. Please. Your becoming a bother."** his eyes were now shut again.  
**"Whatever Jay. Bells. You good now?"  
"Yeah. Thanks. I thought my bladder was going to explode."  
**"**Peter, leave. Now. I aint telling you again." **he mumbled from his pillow.

I walked out hand in hand with Charlotte, heading back into our room.  
"**It's nearly six in the morning."  
"Shhh."** Charlotte pushed me back onto our bed, flipping me over and giving me a backrub.  
**"Relax hon. Please try to sleep."  
"Mmm. Your much too good, how did you know I needed this?"  
"Easy. I just knew. Now, close your eyes and rest your handsome self, let miss Charlotte take care of you."  
"Mmm. That I'll do Ma'am."**

I closed my eyes, drifting to sleep instantly.


	49. Pressure

*I don't own twilight or its characters.*

Sorry it took me so long AGAIN, to update, school was crazy! But here is a LOOOOOOONG Chapter for you guys.

REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!!!!!!!1

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***JPOV

I heard some mumbling and shuffling going on. It was bloody annoying. I turned over, wrapping an arm around the body next to me. I could still smell strawberries over the alcohol induced room.

I stuck my head under my pillow trying to drown out the sounds and try to make my head stop spinning.

My mind went blank and then I felt like I was floating. I smelt a musk vanilla scent. Uhh…okay. That's _not_ Bella.

My eyes opened and I was greeted to my brother's tattooed chest.

The Chinese symbols for honour and courage were on his left peck travelling up his shoulder, Love Conquers All- in latin, in my mother's handwritting across his heart, his tattoo for charlotte was in Spanish down his side written like it was taken from an old latin scroll.

I hollered at him, even going as far as punching him. He woke me up rudely and far as I was concerned, fucker was fair game.

He finally put me back on my bed. I crawled into the covers once more and tried yet again to sleep.

"**He's still drunk."**The hell I'm drunk. Fucking brothers. I could hear his deep baritone voice booming through my head. It was sending the very flat surface of my bed into a tailspin. I kept screaming in my head for him to leave before I actually killed him. I dug my head deeper into my blankets.

"**Peter, leave. Now. I aint telling you again." **I gritted my teeth and began tugging violently at my hair, I was holding back the hot coal rage that was just beneath the surface. My fuse was short as fuck today.

Finally, all the noises stopped. I breathed a sigh of relief and tried again to fall asleep. I dreamt of darkness. Of emptiness. It was me alone, standing in the pit of darkness. I felt cold and alone. The darkness consumed me not allowing me to see anything.

Then, I could hear her groaning beside me. _Fuck Shut up_. I was beyond irritated at this point. I just want to fucking sleep, can anyone leave me alone for more than a few minutes? Fuck.

She turned over, huffing as she did. I tried focus on sleeping, she huffed again and I just couldn't take it.

"**Could you do me a favour and shut the fuck up?"** My Eyes snapped open**"What?"** She turned around to face me. Surprised. No doubt.**"You heard me, shut the fuck up."** My jaw taut.**"Why don't you get the fuck out then because I'm allowed to do whatever I want. You don't own me or tell me what to do." **She spat back at me. Giving me an icy glare, nearly shoving me off the bed.

"**Fine. Have fun sleeping in a lonely bed.""Have fun freezing your ass off and sleeping alone, jerk."**touché.

I left the room, slamming the door and headed to the guest room, thankfully it was empty. I jumped into the bed and fell into a deep slumber.

I awoke with a swift kick to the back.

"**WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE IN THIS HOUSE?""What's going on?"**I realized who I just mouthed to, making me stiffen and scramble out of bed immediately, nearly smacking my head off the desk beside me. **"I need sleep."** I whined. Couldn't hurt.**"I don't care what your excuse is. You do not speak to a woman like th-"** His hand waving in front of me, blurring out completely.**"Yeah yeah, So where am I getting the fucking belt? Outside to our famous tree? Further down perhaps, in the barn or here? 'Cause I need to get some jeans before you decid-"**Nice right hook met my jaw, I felt it crack.

"**Shut up. I don't care if you need sleep. Something is wrong with you.""Yeah I'm still fucking drunk, my girlfriend hates me and I need sleep.""Get out."**

What? Did I hear that right? I stood there dumbfounded.

"**What are you? Stupid? I said Get. Out!"** He bellowed at me. **"If you ain't gon' respect me or people under my roof then get the fuck out of here, now. Go. Out" **How dare he kick me out of my Mama's house.

Adrenline and rage flowed through me. The heat engulfed me like a warm blanket, it felt nice. Nice to have that demon back. My arms tensed, my body ready to dodge or take anything he did. My fists were armed and ready to strike him until he was completely finished. I stepped forward. **"Is that so? I'd love to see you Make me."** My head tilting back and forth, taunting him.

By now, Bella flanked by Roz came into the room. Roz pulled her long hair back in seconds. Her blue eyes met mine, her eyes narrowed at me, she knew what was about to happen. I broke our moment, looking back to my father, who's rage matched mine. He could never hide the hatred and fire that come through his eyes. **"Well, come on daddy.." **I inched forward, I could feel his hot breath on my face. **"Force me out. You know you wanna."**

The two of them stepped in-between the two of us, I wanted to kill him. Bella was in front of me where Roz was trying to get the major of rage to back down. We were pushed apart slightly. Fucking women.

"**I hope Mama is looking down, preparing to smite your ass."** I inched closer to him, hovering over Bella, if his demon can spill out, might as well let his meet mine. **"Let's see what damage you can do now old man. You've had a good run but, I now have the upper hand."** I moved even closer.. All I had to do is push the girls out of the way and he's all mine.

"**JASPER, STOP!"**I looked down, my angel with her brown eyes, my shirt pulled over her body, her hands on my chest, trying to prevent me from doing something I'll regret…... Later, maybe.

"**Come on. Jazz. Stop this. Please. Don't do this…..Dad, please don't kick him out."**I wouldn't move, Bella tugged me pretty hard, Major and myself still staring each other down, anticipating who's going to make the next move. Bella finally yanked me out of the guest room, leaving my angry father.

She pushed me down the hall, I noticed Emmett who was leaned up against the wall not even 4 feet away from the door. I nodded to him and he just shook his head. He didn't like Rosalie getting in the middle of our fights, even if she hasn't been around them all.

"**Fuck off Emmett."**

Bella shoved me even harder into our room, before slamming the door. I was now frantically trying to put my released demon back in his cage. I cannot, I will not let myself hurt her again. I began to think of my mother and what she'd tell me when I got to worked up or angry.

I was met with a slap. **"Don't you ever speak to me like that ever again.""I'm fucking irritated. Please don't hit me again."** I just barely put the lock back on the god damn beast and here she is fucking feeding into him.

She hit me again, this time even harder. **"This is for being insensitive."**

"**Stop hitting me, I cannot be responsible for my actions" **She did it yet again. I grabbed her hands, she gasped then tears streamed down her face.

The irritation and anger dissipated. I pulled her close to me, wrapping her in a tight hug. She began hitting me, yelling and swearing. She was cutting me, metaphorically speaking and it hurt. It cut me like a knife.

After about 15 minutes of listening to her curse me and curse our relationship, beat me and break me for me leaving her in the dark when I was gone and being an asshole to her earlier today, she began leaving soft kisses on my bare chest. Tears began running down my chest from her beautiful eyes.

"**I love you so much, I don't think my heart can handle any more hurt." **I was on the verge of either getting really angry and storming out or breaking down and crying with her, becoming a sap. I chose at the last second. I couldn't bare to hurt her or see her cry, I ignored the rage in me that roared for revenge since I was kicked awake.

"**I love you too darlin.. But it does take two and I'm not the only one causing the pain. Yes, I should've done more to contact you but honestly, try turning on my laptop, it won't turn on. My cell phone is done so, we've got to get me a new one."**

I looked in her deep brown eyes which were still filled with water. **"Are you done beating me? Making me hurt?" **She nodded.

"**Alright. Now, can I please cuddle up with you and get a little more sleep? Please? I've got a nasty hangover and I really need sleep. That Red eye did nothing for me, the time difference is killing me darlin.""Fine but then we work this out Mister.""Whatever you want, I'll do."**

Finally, made it back to my own bed, wrapping my arms around her slender body my hands resting on her stomach and my nose at the back of her neck. I greedily breathed her scent in. I missed it too much.

"**I'm really sorry Darlin. I didn't mean to be an ass. Just..""Shh… let's sleep."**

I fell asleep instantly.

I woke up in a daze. I felt the side next to me which was now vacant. My eyes snapped open as I turned around. I was met with a smiling Bella. She looked beautiful in my torn black shirt.

"**Hi. You were mumbling about your back in your sleep and since I couldn't sleep much, I lightly started rubbing it.""I'm sorry I kept you awake honey. What time is it?""Its 9 in the morning."**

"**Damn, come here honey."**I sat up grabbing her by the hips, she giggled and I pulled her beside me, her face facing mine. **"That's what you've got to do more now. Smile and laugh, god. How I missed your laughter."**

I began tickling her, she giggled and screamed.. Squirming around, evading my hands.

"**No… no.. please… come on … Jazzzzzzzzzz"**

I laughed, chasing her around the room and then eventually it lead through the house, she took off downstairs where everyone was.

"**Emmett. Stop that Brunette!"**Emmett came out of no where, grabbing Bella and lifting her off the ground from her left side.

"**Emmett, No.. Let me go."**

Her begging did nothing, he held her while I tickled her.. I didn't stop until she was red in the face and crying.

"**Ja...zz.. Please.. Stop.. it hurts.."**I finally stopped, Emmett pulled her into a hug before giving her back to me.

"**Sorry, I had to hear your laugh."** I smirked at her, giving her a small kiss.

"**Next time, crack jokes. Tickling hurts after a while."**I chuckled. **"Sorry Darlin.. Forgive me?""Always"** She smiled at me. **"Okay, Shower time.. Then breakfast.."** She headed towards the stairs then looked back where I was still standing.. **"Aren't you coming?"**

I smiled at her.. Evil woman. This was torture, as much as I wanted to go up there, we needed to completely repair our relationship first. I groaned internally. Mentally kicking myself for this. **"I'll take one in a bit. You just go enjoy a hot shower honey. Food will be ready when your done."**

She nodded slightly and headed upstairs.

I headed into the kitchen, trying to make something to eat. This morning has been interesting. From Peter waking me up, to snapping at Bella, getting enraged by my own Father, letting Bella just hand my ass to me basically when I'm trying to console her and just now trying to keep her laughing.

I know exactly what is going to fix us, if we're incapable of doing it ourselves.. There's only one option.

***BPOV

That was weird. Jazz didn't even want to come up with me? You'd think after the night we had and being away from 2 months, he'd want to get out some pent up sexual frustration. I'm not saying that's the answer to our problems but, honestly, being sexually frustrated.. Is well… FRUSTERATING!

I took a long hot shower. It didn't help much. I kept thinking about the tanned, tall, tired looking, messy blond who was a mere floor below me, ugh. Bella, get it together. I turned the heat down slightly, hoping the water would help keep me under control, but frankly, now that he's here… all my control is gone.

I began thinking of what we'd do. Not just sexually, of course that was pretty high up on the list. I just wanted to spend time with just Jazz. He promised we'd go away just the two of us, so hopefully when we talk and start repairing the chinks in the amour of our relationship then we can go somewhere deserted with a waterfall. Just Jazz and Me.

"**Darlin.. What the hell you doin honey?" **a blur of blond flashed before my eyes. I could smell honey.. Mmmmmm. I was lifted off my feet and I felt myself being slightly jostled around. I leaned into the scent, my body craving it, lips pressed into skin, tasting cinnamon. Mm.

His warm body laid with mine. His strong, warm arms wrapping around me, lighting my exposed skin on fire. I clung to his chest, not wanting to let go.

"**You mind telling me why you were trying to be an icicle darlin?"**

I decided to show him.

I straddled his waist and began kissing him roughly and passionately. He didn't fight me at all.

I didn't have to demonstrate for long. He flipped us over and started getting undressed.

Our moment of sheer bliss didn't last long. We could hear Peter storming up the stairs, **"JAY HURRY THE HELL UP WILL YA?""Let's have this in the shower darlin.. I'm suppose to be out with Pete."**

I bolted to the shower, turning it on quickly and hopping in. **"Be out in a few Petey.. I need a shower."**I hear the door shut and then the bathroom door shut with a click. His hands found mine.

He wasted no time. His hands appeared at the bottom of my butt, lifting me up and slamming me against the tile while filling me completely, I gasped. **"Sorry Darlin.. I'm too keyed up."** a small frown appeared on his beautiful face. I wrapped my legs tighter around his torso.

"**Don't be, that was a fucking turnon."** I breathed. I tried to catch my breath and couldn't, at this moment I didn't care. He was thrusting in and out of me like he was riding a fucking race horse. It felt amazing.

I had to contain my will to scream bloody murder. Err… Jasper. I bit down on his shoulder and his grip on my hips got even tighter. The pain… Oh the pain felt glorious. He kept turning me on. He was so rough and almost animalistic, It was beginning to be too much for me.

His growls finally sent me over the edge. He kept growling in the crook of my neck, pounding into me even harder every single time he pulled out, my back was slamming against the tiles harder and harder each time, my nails dug into his back and I kept biting him, I couldn't take the pressure.

I finally reached my orgasm. I was seeing fucking stars, my vision got blurry as I exploded all over him, I began moving my hips in a circular motion on him, wanting even more he complied by bucking into me even harder, I could feel the pain, but right now the pleasure outweighed the pain. I could hear him faintly swearing.

"**Fuck woman. Your too much Darlin Fuck."**

His blue eyes met mine, **"I love you darlin."**His hands gripped my hips even harder, he wasn't just gripping skin, he was actually trying to crush my hip bones. He finally exploded into ecstasy as his thrusts got more furious, I began to get dizzy, I wasn't sure if it was from the frantic sex or the humid bathroom. I kept my head in the crook of his neck and then finally slowed.

"**Are you alright honey?"**I leaned back on the tile. Looking him dead in the eyes, noting his smirk. **"I've never felt better baby.. Why?"**He laughed, **"That was fucking animalistic… but it was fucking fabulous."**

"**That it was. Come on Peter's waiting.""Yeah cock blocking Peter."**

He let me step out first, opting to dry off in the shower. I turned around to face him, watching the water drip from his forehead and down the tip his nose. **"So, I'll see you later?""Course. In fact, why don't you and I.."** He stepped out of the shower and pulled me to him. **"Go out tonight. Just the two of us, huh?""That's perfect. Say, the deck out front, 6 sharp?""Sounds good. I'm driving, you just look beautiful as always.. I'll see you later Darlin.."**

And with a nice, slow passionate kiss he left me in the bathroom.. Off to dress and join Peter.

I finally got dressed after de-tangling my hair and headed downstairs to find everyone gone but Emmett..

"**Hey Emmett.""Hey Izzy. 'bout time you showed yourself, what'cha doin?"**

"**I was looking for you guys.. Where is everyone?"**

"**Well, Jay and Pete are working on the fields, Rose went with the major for a doc's appointment and I believe Charlotte took little David to get some shots done, so its just me and you.. I was planning on going into town and do some rock climbing… do you want to come with me?""I.. uh…don't think so.""Come on Izzy, you can't be that bad. I'll hold your weight, you weigh nothing.""Yeah, I wasn't worried about that.. I'm worried about holding your weight.""Hey! I don't weigh that much… Come on."**He grabbed my arm and we lept off the deck in Emmett 5 year old fashion. We got into the car and he started it up. **"Don't tell Rosie about us jumping off like that.""What? What are you talking about? We walked down them like normal adults. Who jumps off decks.. We'll say Little David did."**

"**That's the spirit Izz."** He laughed.

JPOV

"**So.. What's been up?""Not much, I'm just glad to be back."** I took the next barrel of hay to carry up the ladder and toss atop the barn

"**What happened this morning? You were all over the place.""I was jet lagged, I wasn't careful. I drank too much and hadn't slept some of it off. The demon spilled out today. I want to forget about this Pete. I didn't awake the little guy up did I?"**He laughed while handing me another barrel. **"Nah kid. That boy sleeps like you. Sleeps like the damn dead."**

"**Good. I'm glad."**

The heat became too much in the barn, eventually we just tossed our shirts outside. No doubt we'll get bitched at for it later but- we didn't care, we took a short break, sitting on the enormous pile of hay barrels that still needed to be taken care of.

"**Holy shit man! No wonder why you took so long to shower today."**I said nothing.

"**What the fuck did she do to you last night? You guys shouldn't drink. Looks like she tried to kill you… ahh.. What the hell? Is that? Oh damn. Those are bite marks. Holy shit Jay."**

He didn't need to know it happened mere hours ago.**"Yeah, yeah. Shut up. It's not like you've given it to Charlotte so hard she didn't rip the shit out of you or something.""Fuck, she never bit me. Didn't that hurt?""Are you kidding me? The bite was a prick of a needle compared to the pain I felt trying to get my rocks off. You try being away for so long with no way of being with your girl like that.""I'm glad you went instead of me."** he laughed. **"Let's get this done shall we? We've got more in the field to load up.""Did I mention how much of a bitch this is without Emmett or Dad?""Yeah, but Emmett doesn't help that much. He'd rather chase the sheep or the bulls.""Yeah and get his-self butt raped.""Ha! Ain't that the truth kid. Ain't that the truth."**

The day was too long, the sun shone for too long. I felt like a dying dog. My body needed water desperately. We finished around 5 and I took off in the house to have a shower. I walked into the bathroom from the hallway rather then our room, wanting to give Bella some privacy and while I started the water, I could hear my babe humming along to herself.

"**Hey Darlin.. I'm going to be ready in about 15 minutes. Are you all ready to go?"** I hollered from the shower.

"**Yup. Just waiting on you cowboy."**Awesome.

I got dressed, just putting on some jeans and a dress shirt, followed by my cowboy hat.

We arrived to our restaurant, to be honest, I didn't care where we were, just as long as she was with me.

I broke our silence. **"So, I've been doing some thinking." **my arm reached across the table to grab her hand. **"I was thinking maybe therapy would be good for us, just to work out some issues and help us out a little bit. What do you think?"**My heart raced in anticipation.

"**I was actually thinking of the same thing. Do you want to find someone for next week?""Yeah, of course."**

We shared stories of our day, I shared some stories about my trip away. We laughed and ate to our hearts content.

As we arrived home, she stopped me at the door, pulling me in for a sensual kiss.

"**Mm. That was good, can I have another?""Do you have to ask Jazz?"**

She was at it again. This time we had a tongue war. We fought over and over again for dominance. God I love this girl.


	50. Sweatin' Like A In Church On A Sunday

*I don't own twilight or these characters*  
Sorry it took so long! I think this is my LONGEST Chapter to date! Its nearly 9, 000 words! You all can thank Peter (in this story) for bugging me to put this up.

I'm getting really sad. I think, I'll be ending the story soon. I feel as if I've exhausted my brain from this story line. I have started a new story and have a chapter put up. Ugh. Characters DON'T agree with me. Enjoy!

The only way I'll update quicker is if I get reviews!

* * *

I woke up the next day, leaving Bella in bed. She looked so peaceful, I didn't want to even THINK about waking her up.

I hopped in the shower, not wasting any time or water. I dried off and headed downstairs.. There I saw my brother hunched over in a stool at the island in the kitchen, something's up.

"**The hell you doing down here?"  
"Heading to the office, waiting on you."** He mumbled through his arms.  
**"What happened?"** I poked him.  
"**Let it go Jasper.. Please."**Fuck. If he thinks he's getting off easy.. He ain't.  
"**Want some French toast or something then?"  
**"**Yeah. Can you make it with actual eggs? Not that stupid egg white shit?" **He lifted his head up, he looked like hell.

"**Sure thing Pete."  
**"**I got the coffee. Hey where's Bells?"  
**I smiled just thinking of her. **"She's sleeping still. What about Charlotte? She's usually seeing to it your shit's together before you leave."  
**He scowled **"I'm off to a shower."** He got up, his back facing me as he was leaving the room.  
**"Peter.."**

He turned around to face me, **"Don't. Just leave my breakfast on the table."**

Fuck. He and Charlotte never fell into this. It was always me and Tanya, me and Bella.. But never… never Peter and Charlotte.

I finished making his breakfast and put some coffee in a mug for him, I made it strong.. He'd hate it but he needs it. He finally came back down, looking as he always does, too damn dapper (as grams would say) fucking charming all the damn female and even the male clients we had. He ate with me, saying nothing. "**Thanks Jay"** He washed our plates leaving them to dry. **"Ready to go?"**

"**I'll meet you out there, I've got to grab one thing."** I threw him the keys to the truck and took off upstairs. I quietly crept into our room, she was still sleeping.. Damn it. I'm a selfish bastard. I leaned over her sleeping form, she began to stir.. Her eyes flew open as I leaned in, leaving a soft kiss on her forehead.

"**Oh my god. I slept in."  
"Darlin.. Its fine. You can come in a little later. I'll be in meetings all day, its going to be a slow Monday. Just sleep honey."  
"No I'll get dressed now and go with you."  
"Darlin.. I've left you keys to the car. Don't worry, take your time its fine. I'm off with Peter right now. Just go back to sleep, I'll call you in a few hours alright?"  
"Fine" **she huffed while giving me a hug.

"**I'll see you soon."  
"I love you."  
**"**Love you."**

I tucked her back in bed and raced off to meet my brother in the truck. He had the radio turned up as I jumped in. I turned it down. "**I don't want to talk Jay. Leave the radio blasting."  
"Will you at least-"  
"No. This isn't up for conversation." **His hands gripped the steering wheel. He was angry. I decided not to push further.

"**Bella and I.." **I began, pausing hoping he'd let me finish. **"We agreed to see a therapist to work out our issues."  
"That's great. I think it's a good idea." **I turned the radio back up and sat in silence the rest of the way to the office.

* * *

"**I'll be in meetings today, can you man the phones until Bella gets here?"  
**"**Course. Let me be the lap dog."  
"Fine, I'll man the phones."  
"No, Jay. Sorry. I just, It hasn't been a good day so far. I'll do the phones, use that pretty face to get us more jobs and money." **He slapped me on the back and headed into his office. I continued down the hall into mine.

I spent the day on the phone, doing interviews and treatments that way. After a few hours of mind numbing advice and deal making a knock startled me. "**Yeah?"  
"You've got a visitor."  
"Come on in."**The door opened. **"Look what the cat dragged in this morning. How are you Kate?"  
"I'm fantastic. Cat got your tongue?"  
**"**Yeah, your mind numbing beauty has stopped me in my tracks." **Peter cocked an eyebrow at me before giving her the once over. I shut the door, leaving Peter in the hallway.  
"**Have a seat."**She dropped the gray folder on the table, laying out the papers. **"This is what.. I've got."**

We started comparing information, jotting down numbers and making sure we each had a copy and turns out, I had some documents she didn't. Good thing we met today.

"**Seriously Jasper. Let's get some food."  
"Alright, but your buying." **I pointed at her. We both laughed and headed out of my office. I was locking up, making small chat with Kate when I heard some mumbling from behind me.  
Hmm. That's weird. "**Hi Jasper. Who's.. this?" **Fuck. The look on her face said it all. I glared at Peter.  
"**Hi, I'm Kate. I'm sure you've heard all about me, your Bella right?"** She responded with a smile.  
"**Uh.. Yeah… funny.."** She looked me dead in the eyes. **"I haven't heard a word about you."  
**She cleared her throat obviously uncomfortable. **"Well, Jasper.. I'll meet you at the café.. Bella I hope you'll come."  
**She smiled and walked over to Peter who was standing, waiting at the entrance, probably sticking around to intervene.

I opened my office and let her in.  
"**Darlin.."** I let the door shut behind me.  
**"Oh, don't you **_**darlin**_** me! Who the hell is this Kate woman? How come I know nothing about her? And why the hell is she here?"** She was damn sexy when she was mad. I'm going to Hell.  
"**Your overreacting honey." **I could see I just made it worse.  
**"Don't tell me I'm **_**overreacting! **_**You haven't **_**seen**_** me overreact!" **I put my hands up, palms facing her, **"Okay.. Look, she's the documentator that was hired by that company. Remember, I told you about the whole owing millions and losing it all by just by leaving soon after I got there?"  
**I took a breath. I was sweating bullets, I was nervous, I don't even know why. My palms got sweaty, my airways felt stressed, my brain was running 100 miles an hour. I didn't do anything wrong. But I know Bella can overreact, the odd time. Just have to make it right, smooth it over.

"**Mm-mm."  
**"**When we got sent back, it was in a big rush.. So I had told her we'd take the weekend to relax and we'd meet today to go over everything. I wanted a few days with my girl first."  
"And you **_**couldn't **_**tell me this when you got back because?"  
"If I recall you were too angry and then we got wasted and then we finally made up, I knew if I sprang it on you then, you would've just gotten angry as shit on me.."  
"Maybe. But it **_**doesn't excuse **_**the fact you hid this from me."  
**"**No. It doesn't. I wasn't hiding it. I was actually going to call you for lunch as soon as we decided where we were going to eat. I swear."**She stood there glaring at me.  
"**Why don't you ask Kate about her fiancée? You didn't notice the rock on her finger?"  
"No."  
"Honey, believe me.. She's not my type. She's a looker, granted but.. Come on, your even better. Honest. She ain't a threat. Now, come to lunch, please?"  
**"**I'm still pissed at you."  
"I love you."**

"Is she the reason you didn't keep in touch? And the reason you kept me from coming in this morning with you and Peter?"  
"No. God No! You just looked too peaceful, plus, I think Peter's going through something with Charlotte so I needed to talk to him alone. You know brother to brother talk"

Off we went to lunch. Bella and Kate seemed to hit it off. I wasn't too sure considering I was getting all the dirty looks and snide comments. So, I did keep it from her, my mistake.. My fault. I disappeared from the table conversation and just let myself zone out. "**Well."** My back was slapped. **"We done at the office, brother?"  
"Yeah."  
"Bells? Can you give Jay a ride home? I need the truck"  
"Okay."  
**"**Play nice now children." **He chuckled. What a bastard. **"Kate, it was nice to meet you today. Maybe our paths will cross again."  
"You as well Peter. Bella, call me anytime and Jasper- I'll fax over the information within the next hour, I may receive the confirmation tomorrow, which I'll fax to you."  
"Alright, take care Kate." **She walked off and then Bella and I headed home.  
She got into the drivers seat and turned the radio off.. Our ride started out touchy as fuck. She wouldn't say anything to me, no music to mask the silence and her hands were gripped tight to the steering wheel.

Its now or never. Gotta get her to talk. **"You know, your hands are gonna be sore."  
"I don't care" **she spat.** "Why do you have to hide shit? I thought we were going to be more honest with each other?"** her eyes never met mine, they were burning holes in the road.  
**"We are. I just.. I didn't want to talk about work after being away for so long, I just wanted to spend time with you. I missed you. I wanted work to stay outside for a while. Can you blame me?"  
"Yes and no. But still."  
"I know and I'm sorry."  
**She said nothing, her hands were loose on the steering wheel, her hand softly touched mine, I grabbed it and gave it a small kiss.

"**I called Doc Masen. She referred me to a Dr. Benson, he has an opening tomorrow afternoon at 3.. Was it wrong of me to book it then?"  
"No, its fine. I'm glad you didn't forget."  
"Never honey."**

I knew she was still mad, just not to an explosive extent. Man, I really hope I don't end up on the couch tonight. She blew up at me again, when we got home, needing to get it out.. no one was even in so that was a bit of a plus, no outsiders butting in. Evidently, I did end up on the couch..

* * *

We've now been in therapy for 4 months and we didn't even really need it after the first 2. We mostly attended workshops as a couple and made more time to date and just hang out separately and together, trying to balance everything we have going on.

Charlotte and Peter.. Complete fireballs. She's left here 3 times since that one day heading to the office. I remember when Bella was livid about Kate. Man, Peter was even worse when he got in and saw that Charlotte done packed herself and left with her accomplice, my girl. He blew up on Bella. I wasn't having it and well.. Lets just say he still has a slight bruise over his eye, Charlotte came racing back just to _beat my ass _with a _rolling pin_. Never _underestimate_ our women I guess. Stubborn, tough, beautiful and strong as an ox. Jeez.

I ended up waking up at the crack of dawn. Bella was off with Charlotte and her parents, I guess preparing lunch and whatever else. Apparently, we were celebrating Pop's birthday today, rather than wait for Wednesday when he would expect it. So naturally, Pete handled the house and I had to be out in the sun. I was racing around the property. Getting all the chores done, Pops was doing really well. He just rode the tractor though, lazy old bag. Birthday or not, he should've been trucking through this shit like I was. He did the fields, I fed the horses and the little livestock that was still around and checked on part of the barn. It's been falling apart the last couple of years, mainly the roof. It kept getting damaged from the heavy thunderstorms that were rolling through. I knew it had to get fixed but with everything that went on.. Dad's health, a new baby, me being overseas and just the basic family drama. It's been tough. After the party, that damn roof is being fixed.

Emmett and Roz have been scarce. They ended up quietly getting married and getting the heck out of the country.. Its been 3 months since I last saw them, which was their shotgun wedding.. Minus the bun in the oven. My damn aunt.. Flipped out. She's always been after the 3 of us to "marry" good southern blood. I can understand her reasons, she did, her mama before her, and so on and so forth but fuck, doesn't she know that you _cant help _who you fall in love with? Who takes your heart until your last breath and even then, they were your true love?

Evidently, she didn't get that memo.

She's never warmed up to anyone. She likes Charlotte, to an extent.. Mainly because the three of us love her so much. Mama simply adored her. I will never understand my aunt, much as I love her, I know her intentions are good but, Rose, Pete and I aren't 5 years old. Hopefully, she won't be too hard on Bella. Not that I'd ever give her a chance to get hard on her. Definitely the one person I'll have to watch out for today. "**Jasper! What do you say.. We look into tearing this barn down and starting new?"**Pops. I turned around to look at him, his face has begun to soften a bit, he seemed happier.. More alive, He didn't hobble around with a cane anymore and didn't even need assistance to stand up.. He's come a long way. We still had our ups and downs- granted.. Lately, its like he's stripped off a bit of that tough shell.

His strong and sturdy self walked right up to me, poking me and then repeating himself.

"**Yeah Major. I'll round up the troops and we'll get started on that soon."  
"Pop."  
"Huh?"  
**"**Call me pop son, how many times do I have to tell that darn head of yours?"  
"Sorry, old habits are hard to break." **He laughed.. He hadn't laughed with me for some time. Not his deep, jolly, happy, infectious laugh. He only had that with mama, the one person who had his entire world. I chuckled with him.  
He took a seat on a bale of hay, wiping the sweat off his brow. **"I'm sweatin' like a whore in church on a Sunday."  
"Yeah, don't I know it."  
"Where'd the girls get to?"  
"I believe they are off making trouble, you know.. Since they couldn't bother you today."  
"I suppose so"  
**We ended up laughing again.

_The last few weeks the girls have been pulling pranks and doing all sorts of stuff. The funniest was when they water ballooned my own pop! Now that was funny. I don't know how they ever did it, nor I don't think I'll ever know. But I guess they somehow got him outside to look at one of our broodmares. Somehow, he fell for it and went outside. Bella pulled both me and Pete to the door before she jumped off the porch to join her partner in crime.. They bombarded him with balloons.. Pete and I doubled over in laughter as we heard our poor father yelling at us, telling us to back him up. No way were we going to get in the middle of that war._

"**It's best to stand down when you've got nothing to fight with."** I recalled- I shouted it from the porch when I got a chance to breath that day.  
"**Course you do. The charm, hell, your taller and faster than those girls."  
"Ahh, but not smarter.. Those women. A damn force to be reckoned with."  
**I pulled the other tractor out into the sun so I could see what I had to do. It crapped out on me yesterday, thankfully it happened when I was putting it back inside.. At dusk so, checking everything was out of the question. I opened the lid and began checking all the parts, giving the whole machine a once over in broad daylight. The transmission was shot. Course, it was the last thing I'd check as I'm now covered in oil. **"We're going to need a new trans.. Its shot to hell."  
**"**S'alright son. We'll go into town tomorrow and get a new one. So.. Are you going to do it yet?"**

Wow, changing the topic? Usually he'd be flipping about the transmission. Giving me hell because I must've overworked it or something of that nature.  
**"I don't know. Are we seriously talking about this dad? I.. It hasn't been the best timing.. You know with Roz and Emmett.. And then with all this work.."  
"I know. I just wanted to make sure its still in your mind is all.."  
"Believe me, it is.. Soon as the right time comes.. Don't you worry pops."  
**Dad was about to say something when we heard a car speeding up the driveway.

"**What the hell is this hooligan doing speeding up my driveway, why I oughta.." **He got up and made a mad dash up towards the house, I started after him.. If anything, I actually had to be his backup. I heard squealing and laughter as we approached the car. I tried to wipe the gunk off myself.. But.. It didn't work, I just succeeded by embedding it in my skin and my jeans, were streaked with oil and had dust on them.. Yeah Bella might have my head. Out they jumped. On the major first.. Wait… who the hell is that?

I fell to the ground with a resounding thump. _Fucking Emmett. _How the hell does a big thing like him move so fast? **"You were suppose to catch me fucker." **He laughed as he got up and picked me up with him. I was trying to catch my breath, him landing on me made my body just spazz out. "**Thanks Son, you just gave him rat gut.. Get the hell over here before you decide to send him to the ground again" **I bent over, trying to regulate my breathing. "**Jesus.. A little warning next time please."** Fucking guy could've killed me, he's heavier then my horse stuck in the mud. I swear. I stood up, looking up.. I know Rosalie's here somewhere. I looked towards the porch, there she was, putting down her purse on the step.

I began walking to the porch, mimicking her steps, they got bigger and quicker, I followed suit and she smacked into me, jumping into me and I twirled her in a bear hug. I could feel her body heave against mine.. She was emotional. I felt my own sense of relief and held her tightly, **"Good to have you back Roz."** I did miss her, everyone did.. But no two people were closer then her and myself. We both had a moment where we cried and just held on to each other like the other was a life raft. We finally let go of each other, she was already trying to fix herself. Straightening her shirt and brushing her hair out of her face, I wiped her tears away with a clean part of my hand. I smiled at her. Always strong.. Never showing a moment of sadness.. But with me, I _got_ her. She always shown me her vulnerability but I also always got the brunt of her hard-headedness as well.

"**Ew. You hugged me like that? Go take a shower."** she shoved me backwards, half laughing.  
**"Already ordering me around? Damn it woman."** I ruffled her hair.

She pushed me towards the house, I noticed my father and Emmett had already headed inside give us some privacy. **"Distract my father will you? I'm going to help Pete."  
**"**Already happening. Oh, Charlotte and Bella will be here shortly, just before my parents, I believe."  
**"**Great." **I took off my shoes, not wanting to mess up the spotless house. Wow. They really did it all nice. No streamers were put up in the house, they were all out back, where Pete was sneaking around setting it up. I took off up the stairs trying to at least get decent before everyone got here. Bella included. She's seen too much of the messy, dirty, tired me lately. She needs to see the man I am when I'm clean, pressed, proper and lively. Instead of the groans to waking up at the crack of dawn. She was patient with me, I owed her a day of normalcy. I owed her a lot more, but she knew things had to be done.

I didn't see much of her either, she was either at the office or at school trying to become a massage therapist. She didn't think she had the chops but my body would disagree. She was good at it. Better then most people.

I scrubbed my arms the best I could, trying to get the oil and dirt off. I succeeded. Thankfully, I don't wait too long to shower after finishing for the day. I brushed my teeth.. Finally feeling clean. I wandered into our room, putting on some dark wash jeans, a black wife beater and a black long sleeved dress shirt. I buttoned it up, knowing leaving it open at first would set my aunt off. Too picky. She would probably bitch about my jeans but, let's hope not. I checked the mirror making sure I was "presentable" for the reminder of the evening. I sprayed on some body spray and grabbed a hat. Now, I'm ready to go. I heard a commotion at the door. Please don't let it be my aunt.. Please don't let it be my damn aunt! Lord knows, we weren't ready.. Yet.

I took off downstairs, taking a peek at the now empty doorway, I slipped past it, taking off down the hallway in the opposite direction, going through the kitchen and heading outside. Emmett and Peter had it all set up. "**All we're missing is the drinks and since Jay is barbecuing.."  
**"**Hey, you just get in there.. I think Caroline's here."  
**"**Aw Fuck. She's gonna ruin everything by being here early." **Peter ended up taking off inside.. Emmett right on his heels, saying someone needed to save his dear Rosie.

I went into the kitchen to grab the burgers and hotdogs, wanting a bit of a start .. Emmett and peter would clean me out before I had a chance to get a second batch going.  
I turned on the radio before I went back out to begin cooking the meat, I loved the way it sizzled on the grill.  
The ever familiar sound. I hum slightly to the radio, letting it blend it nicely with the grill.

A whacking sound broke me out of my silent humming fest. I flinched. The sound reminded me of when I'd get whipped.  
The Major's belt, the way it would whistle in the air before coming in contact with my skin. How it would usually hit fresh wounds, the pain that followed, that sound stuck with me..  
I would never ever forget the sound it'd make in the air and as it came into contact with my skin.

"**Owwwww" **I heard chuckling and turned around.

There was my girl. Her hair was pulled back, she was in jeans and a blue bikini top, tears were welling up in her eyes. I looked past her to see my brother, with a big shit eating grin on his face, towel over his shoulder. _Are you fucking kidding me? _He looked at me and his shit eating grin faded. I must've looked more angry than I was. He turned his head away, **"Yeah Babe? Be right there."** and disappeared from my sight. _You can't run forever._

I turned down the grill and walked over to Bella, scooping her into my arms. She cried a bit. My hands ran down her back, in circles trying to console her, that's when I felt it and she cried out, rather than wincing. Damn. I pulled her right into my body, my chin going just past her shoulder to look.. Fucking Peter. Her welt looked to be about 3 inches wide, 2 inches long and was raised about half an inch from her skin, it looked like if he hit her any harder she'd bleed. "**Peter's gonna pay Darlin."** Her arms wrapped themselves around my body, holding me to her tightly. **"First, I'm going to take care of you. Wait here."  
**I went inside and grabbed some ice. Charlotte poked her head in, Her blond hair cascading down on her face.. "**Caroline's here. Are We?"  
"Ready? Almost. Give me **_**5 minutes**_**"** I gritted my teeth, spitting at her. I knew she didn't deserve it, my brother did.. At least she'd heed my words and stall effectively for me.

I picked my girl back up into my arms and sat us down on a nearby chair, I applied the ice to her back, first she cried out and then sighed. **"How bad is it?""Pretty bad. I'm surprised you aren't bleeding.. Any harder and granted you would be."  
"I didn't think he'd bother me if I came out here.. I was looking for you anyways." **Her eyes met mine, I smiled softly at her. My beautiful girl. I kissed her lightly.. She clutched onto my shirt and my neck, pulling me closer to her.. Deepening the kiss. I had to end it… for now.

I stood us up and undid my shirt. She smiled evilly at me. I took off my wife beater and then put my dress shirt back on, I needed her to cover up that mark.. If I ever saw it again tonight.. I'd kill Peter and possibly my Aunt. She could set me off, if I was already pissed. I didn't want any fights on Dad's day. **"Put this on Darlin.. Please."** She rolled her eyes but put it on, She tucked it in her jeans slightly so it wasn't too low or too baggy on her. "**So your aunt's going to be here.. shouldn't I.."  
"No. Your not to do anything hon. You look great, in my clothes, she'll deal she needs to realize not all women can cover up from head to toe in 50 degree weather babe.." **She bit her lip and walked past me to the grill. "**Hey, that's my job." **I took the spatula out of her hands and pulled her to my body.. She protested and laughed at me, then tried to take the spatula from me. I held it over my head knowing she'd never get it.  
She laughed, **"You think your so smart cowboy.. Snicker at this" **She jumped up on me, her legs wrapping around my body, feet locking together on my back. She smiled then leaned in and kissed me, her hands ended up in my hair, tugging on my curls, pulling me closer to her and keeping me there.

"**Ahem. I think it'd be wise for Bella to go on and get dressed. Your aunt is here." **I groaned and helped her off me. She just nodded, bitting her lip, looking just like a child. She was nervous.  
"**Dad can you handle the grill? I'm just gonna go greet her and make sure Bella gets upstairs before Caroline sees her."  
"Of course. Don't be too long. Peter will be waiting to steal your place."  
"I won't be."  
**We headed inside and actually made it up the stairs before my aunt came in the house, I was closing my room door when I heard her come in, shouting something about a cold drink and wondering where I was.

"**I don't.. what if she doesn't like me?"  
"How could she not? Look at you.. Your perfect. Your beautiful, charming, funny, witty as hell.. My dad loves you more than me.. Darlin.. Please, get that nasty thought out of there.. My aunt never hates anyone, she's bitter but she's not **_**that**_** awful.."  
**"**Okay fine. Just wait here, please."  
"Course Darlin"  
**I sat on the bed and nervously waited for my girl to come back out all polished. I really hoped my aunt wouldn't be too hard on Bella. This shit was scaring me.

She came out about 10 minutes later with her hair down, some makeup and a nice little black sweater dress that came to her knees with a grey belt just barely touching her gorgeous bottom. It hugged her beautifully, it was also cut low in the front but not too low. God, do we really have to go downstairs? I just want to take her now! "**Come on Cowboy before I change my mind."  
"You look.. Amazing.. Are you sure you don't want to change that mind of yours Darlin?" **She blushed and laughed. **"Come on. You can lust after me later."  
"I'll remember that babe."**

We left the comfort of our room. I felt her shaky hand clasp my own. My thumb immediately went to work, rubbing circles and just trying to sooth her with my touch, I couldn't offer her much more. All I wanted to do was pick her up, turn us around into my room and hold her until she stopped trembling.. And then, maybe make her tremble in a good way. I took slow and steady breaths, trying to brace myself for the crazy woman I'm going to be butting heads with all night. I gave Bella a sympathetic look as we reached the bottom of the stairs.

She just nodded slightly at me.. I let go of her hand, letting my arm wrap around her waist and grabbing her other hand. I was going to put up a united front. Aunt Caroline would just have to deal, and if she didn't.. then so be it. Bella's soft hand was now rubbing my chest.. She was still trembling, her face didn't say so.. She put up a good front.

"**Ohhhhhhh there you are. I thought you'd gone and slept with the fishes or something" **Aunt Caroline. Damn it. She started making her way over to me, not seeing Bella on my arm, I guess she was out of view. She began to hug me and then stopped. Her arms snapped back to her own frame, crossed along her chest, almost as if I shocked her with a bolt of electricity or something. "**I didn't realize you were with anyone.. My.." **I could see those nasty wheels turning in her head. "**Aunt Caroline.. This is my girlfriend Bella… Darlin this is my aunt Caroline."**

Bella outstretched her hand with a smile, I could see Rosalie just behind my aunt a few yards away. Her face taut, glaring.. She knew as well as I, this could get ugly.  
"**That's nice Jasper."** She looked to me, not even bothering to look at Bella, she didn't even smile or shake her hand. She grabbed my arm instead pulling me to her with the strength of a damn elephant. **"Come, you must tell me what you've been doing since I've seen your handsome self last."** she hugged me tightly and then kept both of her hands on my arm, pulling me away from Bella.

I outstretched my hand to Bella just barely grabbing her thumb, **"Darlin"** was all I said for her hands to touch my back and follow my aunt outside. Everyone was chatting away. Dad made a point to keep Bella company and away from my aunt while I was being pulled everywhere with my aunt.

"**So, your…. Girlfriend.. Seems nice. Not much of a talker is she?"  
"Bella.. Is wonderful. She's just like me. Not one to have the power to impress everyone like you Aunt Caroline"  
**"**I guess not."** She frowned** "So what is it about her? I mean really.. it's a shame that.."** all but spitting the words on the ground.  
**"Aunt Caroline.. Listen to me and listen good. I don't want to disrespect you, I know you mean well but Bella.."** I looked over to where she was, she had a small smile for me..I smiled back and waved, holding back the urge to just go and be near her **"Is what I want. She is the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with. Surely, you can understand that? What if Chuck wasn't a good southern man?"  
"You cannot compare my Chuck to that…**_**outsider."**_ she glared at me  
"**Aunt Caroline.." **I knew it. I was going to Blow.

"**Excuse me, Miss Caroline.. I just need to steal Jasper for just a moment."** I was pulled backwards and away from the immediate crowd that appeared by the grill and picnic table. "**Jasper.. Calm down. This is your father's day."  
"I **_**know.**_** I just can't fucking take her doing this."  
"You've got to. Its better that she's doing this to you and **_**not**_** Bella."  
**Fuck. Charlotte was right. It was better that she was getting her digs in with me, if she was doing this to Bella? Well.. Who know what would've happened. I hugged Charlotte. **"Thanks."  
**She laughed. **"Soon as I saw your stupid eyes narrow and your brow furrow, I knew something was wrong. Just keep yourself in check.. And remember.. She doesn't have to like Bella.. Only you do. You're the only person that matters."  
**"**Aside from the family that actually**_** wants**_** me to marry her."  
"Exactly, now come on! Let's find our lovers.. Shall we?"** her hand grasped my arm and slipped down to my wrist as I held my arm by my side. Sounds good to me.

I found Bella briefly. **"You alright Darlin?"** my arms found her waist immediately.  
**"I'm having a great time."** her smile quivered.  
"**What is it?"  
"No. No its nothing.. I'm just going to grab a few more drinks.. Be back in a minute, and save me a burger will you?"  
"I will." **With a quick kiss she disappeared into the house. Something was up, I just hope it was her nerves and not anything else.

I grabbed her burger and grabbed us both a seat, I couldn't wait for her to come out.. The smell of the food was intoxicating so I began to eat without her. Dad was mingling and happy as ever. He kept raising his glass to me with the biggest smile on his face. I'm glad this party worked out, he needs a pick me up. I tipped my hat at him. This was a great plan.

* * *

**BPOV

I didn't hate the party. I just hated how their aunt looked at me. Like I wasn't any good. That I was just the low man on the totem pole. As if I didn't matter.. Like I was the dirt she walked on. It was disgusting.

Jasper was able to hang with me long enough to introduce me to some of his family members. Turns out his uncle chuck- is unfortunately married to the mean woman.. He was really nice and was really interested in what I had to say and just genuinely interested, he did tell me that if Jasper and I didn't tie the knot soon, he'd be making something happen. Everyone around us cracked up laughing.

I found out some nice tidbits. I found out that chuck is actually Jacqueline's twin brother, and even told me some stories about how Jasper would do anything to make her smile.. She was his earth. I felt saddened a bit, I knew how much he really loved his mom and how much he truly missed her. It was a hole that no one would be able to fill.

I finally got to see my lovely cowboy.. She was _staring_ at us. Giving me dirty looks and just overall not approving.

_I get it Caroline. Jesus. Stop glaring at me._

I needed away from her glaring eyes. I just couldn't handle how she would openly glare, regardless of how the vibe from the rest of the family was positive and just very loving. _She was out to get me_. I went inside and felt a little better. I grabbed a glass and drank some water. Why am I letting a woman scare me away from a good party? From the Major? Why? I needed to show her I wasn't going to back down. She wasn't going to scare me away from my happiness.. From where I'm suppose to be. I decided I wasn't going to be scared anymore I was going to face that woman.

"**Well, if it isn't the insignificant **_**child.**_**" **I turned around, completely startled.  
"**Hello Caroline. Enjoying the festivities?"** Kill 'em with kindness Dad always said.  
"**Somewhat. However, there is this annoying little insect that won't seem to go away." **Could you be anymore subtle?  
**"Oh really? There's some bug spray in the pantry. Help yourself."  
"I don't know who you think you are. You think you've got my little Jasper in your hooks. You just wait. He'll see you for what you are. Your nothing but trash, an insignificant child that doesn't belong in a man's world."  
"Really? He certainly doesn't see me as a child. In fact, I'm pretty sure I was **_**moulded**_** perfectly for his world. His **_**Equal**_**."**

She threw her head back and laughed. **"**_**Please!**_** You know your out of place here with the slang and the twang. You cannot keep up **_**little girl**_**. You know, Jasper always goes back to his roots. To his home. Why else are you still here with him and not off in a trailer somewhere else? Hmm?" **She stalked towards me like I was the last pork chop on sale **"He's predictable. He's going to see a nice girl he likes, with roots just like his.. She doesn't need the explainin and how to fit in.. she'll already fit with everything.. Unlike the poor babyin that both his brother and father seem to do for you since Jasper is too busy to translate."**

"**I don't need him with me every second."** I retorted.  
**"Course not. Just like he'll soon tire of you.. And toss you out like the trash you are."  
**"**Just remember, you aren't Tanya.. You'll never be her and he's never looked at you like he did her.. No sparkle, no looking at you like you're the only woman in the room.. Its quite sad no one has ever informed you dear."**

Its like she slapped me. Tanya? Seriously?

"**Darlin.. There you are. Your food is getting cold." **I wanted to slap her. I really did. Instead I just walked calmly to Jasper, wrapping my arms around him and pulled him close to me. He kissed my head and hummed before our embrace turned into joined hands and walking outside. "**Mind telling me why the baby rabbit was in the lioness' corner?"  
"No." **We said nothing else as we sat down.

The major knew something was up, his eyebrows cocked up at us before heading inside.  
"**I should.."  
"Just go.. Stop him. He probably thinks something else happened." **He kissed my cheek and ran off inside.

"**She's not called the ice queen for nothing Bells. I'm just sorry she got to you in there." **I threw part of my bun at the blond across from me. "**Hey! Waste of a bun lady!"  
"Don't you lady me!"  
"Hey, just don't let her get to you. If you do, it'll eat you up."  
"Yeah.. I know."** I pushed the food around my plate.

"**I know what will cheer you up.. Come on.. Take off those heels and get on your feet."  
"What?"  
"Just come on. Times a-tickin woman! I'm not getting any younger!"**

I stood up and took his waiting hand.. He led me away from the table and the mingling guests.

I started dancing, I don't know how but Peter was making me dance. I couldn't do anything but burst out in laughter.. I was spinning in circles and just being moved around the lawn. The sun continuously beamed into my eyes, blinding me every single time I made contact with the rays. Every turn was exhilarating, I felt like I was flying.. Nothing could touch me.

Suddenly, I got very dizzy and felt my heart thump rapidly in my chest, my throat was closing and I was calling out to Peter before it all went black.

* * *

**P POV

I couldn't just let her sit there and look so torn up about this shit. It isn't her fault, its not anyone's. You know whenever there's a party, there always has to be ONE person who's got to try and bring the place down. Naturally, like always I had to try and make my little Bells feel better. I don't mind it at all. Someone's got to be the joker in her corner when her Ace is underneath the queen of hearts. It's as if she's Alice in a fucked up Wonderland and I'm the Blue Caterpillar, the voice of reason and often times; cryptic as fuck, the Mad Hatter is, well.. A nutcase but we all know he's one of Alice's close allies.. A caterpillar's duty is never fulfilled.

Finally.. I got this damn girl to dance with me. I've been trying all day for her to dance with me, constantly getting turned down. No way she's leaving my grip now. I spun her around in circles and kept a fast pace.. She kept up and didn't stumble unlike last time, she stumbled a bit at first but I think I'll blame the alcohol and the packed club for that. Her Laughter was infectious. I couldn't even bite back my own chuckles as they came out loud and thunderous over her melody of giggles.

We stopped for a second, I knew we needed to stop for a second or we'd die, the heat was dying down a bit..

"**How you holding up bells?"**

I barely heard my name as I saw her crashing down to the ground. I caught her quickly and took us around the corner, not wanting a crowd around her.

_Great Pete! You made her fucking faint._

I checked her pulse just to be sure it wasn't anything serious.

FUCK!

_Come to where we were dancing, we're away from the crowd. _Charlotte appeared suddenly, the look on her face.. A frown took the place of a smile, her eyes fell. "**What happened?"  
"She just passed out, her glands are swollen."  
"Peter.."  
"What?" **She pointed to her foot.. 2 puffy, circular bites were creating a huge rash on her foot.  
"**Get to the car now. I think she was stung by a yellow jacket."  
"What?" **Fuck, great.. I ignored what I shouldn't have.  
"**There's epi pens in the truck, go now to the emergency room. I'll contain everything here and send Jasper over. Go!" **_Jasper's going to have my fucking head._

I lifted her up carefully and sped to the truck. I strapped her in and dug around for the pens. I found them, sticking 2 in my pocket before stabbing the first epi in her leg, she gasped heavily and shot forward completely alert. Almost as if I just shocked her back to life, literally. **"I… I."** her chest heaved, breathing erratic, she was flipping out."**Calm down sweetheart. You're alright. We're going to get you checked out." **I took off, leaving a cloud of smoke in my wake.

My Phone buzzed. A text.  
_Those Epi's will only last about 5 minutes each. There's 2 left in the glove compartment after the first one you use. Don't wait too long between them and get there before you run out. Love you both._

"**Hang on Bells" **I accelerated and took a tight corner, silently praying that god would let the truck make it around the corner.. We made it around the corner, barely.. I could feel the truck threatening to tip over. She passed out again, I stabbed her again. She jerked awake. I could hear her raspy breathe.. My adrenaline was through the roof. My heart was beating too fast.. My palms were sweaty. I had to make it. I had to.

Come on. I pushed the truck even further, I could hear the engine roar in protest.. Fuck. Don't quit on me now, let me get there.

I parked in a non parking zone, my body smacking against the steiring wheel, my tightly pulled seatbelt and my seat. I nearly gasped for breath myself. Fuck, that hurts. Thankfully, I saved Bella from that same fate. I hopped out and opened the door, when she was gasping for breath, her face was beat red, I think her whole body was now covered in this rash. Her eyes were tearing up as she looked to me.. Looking for something… someone.. As she was completely terrified.

I pulled the last one out of my pocked and forcefully thrusted it into her leg. She grasped me as soon as she came to. I picked her up and headed inside. Holding her in front of me, she looked like a child, clutching to me, telling me not to leave.. She was scared. I began screaming at a nurse telling them to hurry because I was out of epi's and only had about 4 minutes on this last one.

The nurse didn't even protest, nor did she even say anything to me. I carried the fragile woman in my arms to a hospital bed. They began putting monitors on her and asking me when it had happened. You know the usual stuff they do. I mentioned she didn't have any other allergies except to Bees. I believed it was Yellow jackets that had gotten her but wasn't sure. They had to kick me out while Bella cried out for me. I grabbed one of the nurses, spinning her around. "**She's family. She's married to my brother. Please, when you've got her in a better state.. I'll be right outside.." **So it was a lie, they're _practically married anyways _but I knew we wouldn't be able to see her if I didn't come up with something. She nodded while shoving me out the door. **"I'm sorry sir, we'll have someone come for you soon." **I watched as the doors shut in front of me. I could hear Bella's cries for me start to fade away.

Damn. _Jasper really is going to kill me._

I went out to the truck to move it, it was steaming like crazy. I was lucky the radiator held together to let me make it here. I moved it into a parking space and went to turn it off when it actually died on me. Not only will Jasper kill me for injuring his girl, he's going to kill me for killing his other girl. I picked up my phone and dialled, might as well let myself get a pine box for the hole I've dug for myself. At least in my brother's eyes.

"**This better be Bella telling me what fucking color Peter's fucking _pine box_ is gon be."**

I bit back my laughter.. I could hear Rosalie's disturbing list of profanities. I think I'm in deeper then I realized.


	51. AN: Just FYI!

Just a tiny update.. I'm currently trying to finish up the next chapter.. Was looking forward to more reviews.. Oh well.

I've actually opened a Twitter Account for this story and maybe other stories in the future..

/desertordisaste

So if you'd like to send me your ideas or just find out when the next update will be or anything at all…


	52. Its Time

**_*I don't own twilight or its characters.* (I only own the ones outside the twilight universe)_**

_I'm a BAD writer! I didn't update forever! I'm soooooooo sorry! I meant to post this earlier but life, work and school got in the way._

I also **MET** Jackson twice in the span of not even 24 hours recently so I've been trying to recover from a massive heart attack! _***He's a total sweetheart **_and jeez. What my experience was like, he nearly killed me.. He wasn't an INCH from my face taking pictures with me and pullling me muuuuuuuuch too close to him. (not that I minded but.. You know.) For someone who gets grabbed and god knows what at twilight stuff/100 Monkey shows think he would be a little apprehensive of pulling someone completely FLUSH against you.

Here's an extra long chapter…! I swear I've got most of what happens already planned out.. And I'm hoping by _November_ this story will be completed!

* * *

**JPOV

I got inside just in time. Dad had Caroline backed in a corner, staring her down. No doubt instilling that great Whitlock fear in her.

"**Y'know Jackie is Rollin in the dirt right about now, don'tcha Peter?""Don't you **_**ever**_** tell me what **_**my Jacqueline**_** would think or do."**

"**Don't be so stupid. How dare you allow that piece of Trash to come in and corrupt your lives? Your little boy's life? Your grandson's?"**

Piece of Trash? Feel like taking a glance in the mirror dear auntie?**"Quit getting ill as a god damn hornet Caroline. You are really full of it. There aint nothing wrong with Bella and she isn't trash, its just your filthy mouth."**

I silently laughed at my father using my mama's famous 'ill as a hornet' line..

_smack._** "How **_**dare**_** you speak to me in such terms!"**

I just stood back, hoping that they would cool off on their own. No need to get involved. They were grown people.. Well.. He was.**"I'll have you know Mr. Whitlock.. Your so called Jacqueline shouldn't have married your sorry ass.. What good did you ever do for her? Piss poor excuse of a man, you couldn't even keep yourself in check.." **Is she seriously trying to provoke him? "**The only good you ever did for her was when you gave her sons.. But let's not forget, you couldn't even hold yourself back from her dear little Jasper.. Such a brilliant boy.. That poor beautiful child you've cursed and pushed down a never-ending black abyss"**

Okay.. Now its time to step in.. I got in the middle of the two of them I vaguely registered the yelling in my ear.

"**Your talking like a damn crazy woman. Jasper's Fine. Peter is fine. Ain't nothing wrong with my boys.. You don't know nothing 'bout my family, let alone my boys.""I do.. And frankly, I'm **_**glad **_**she's dead.. Because **_**finally**_**.. She's away from you.. Free of the pain and the tears she'd weep over Jas-"**

I heard the door slam. **"JASPER!"** what the fuck? The yelling stopped, Charlotte came into the room.

"**Jasper."  
"Charlotte what's wrong?"  
"Bella had to go to the hospital. Peter's with her."**

I took my phone out of my pocket dialling, charging past my father, aunt and Charlotte to get outside, everyone in the kitchen apparently needed to follow me.

"**Oh how fortunate. The little trailer trash whore get's herself hurt and runs off with the other Whitlock boy, what a travesty. 'Course, I've warned you what happens when you swim through toxic waste"** I stopped in front of Roz who wouldn't let me pass..

"**Mother.. What the hell are you talking about?"**

I tried to ignore the fight that was going to erupt around me, barely registering the phone picked up. "**This better be Bella telling me what fucking color Peter's fucking **_**pine box**_** is gon be." **I seethed.

"**Yellow Jackets happened Jay. I'm sorry."**

"**Your sorry..? Wait, what?"**

"**I think Yellow jackets stung her before we both realized"**

They continued to talk and yell around me.

"**Darling.. You know as well as I do about the little cesspool Jasper keeps himself swimming in, don't you? Such a shame **_**she**_** decided to take Peter for a round as well."**

I could feel the fire within me just begging for some release.. She needs to shut up before I shut her up for good and end up regretting it. Mama wouldn't like that, although.. I'm sure as this sun currently beating down on us that Chuck would approve. Dad's probably nearing the end of his rope and off to get his shotgun to take her out back behind the barn in about 2 seconds.

"**Trash? Seriously Mother? Look at all the shit your swimming in. If anyone's trash, its your fucking attitude.. I'm sure Uncle Pete can use it for fucking fertilizer.. How about I toss you in the fucking machine, grind you to little itty bitty pieces and spread you around this property myself"** Apparently, Someone else was in line. Rosalie was at the front. Wanting first dibs, waiting for the velvet ropes on the vip area to open and finally let us in on the kill Caroline show.

"**Rosie, you don't want to do this.. come on, let's cool off babe.""Don't tell my daughter what to do you overgrown idiot."**

Why can't everyone shut up? I walked further away from them.

"**Look Jay, just get here.."** his exasperated voice barely getting the words out**"Your explaining everything when I get there."**

"**Don't forget your ring."  
"What for?"** why is my ring important when my girlfriends in the hospital?**"Just wear it."**

I shoved my phone back in my pocket and noticed Bella's shoes on the ground, right where we were sitting. I picked them up and was welcomed back into the conversation I didn't want to fucking be bothered with right now.

"**Remember Caroline, you are in **_**my**_** house, I won't hesitate to make you leave. Rosepedal.. Please calm yourself Darlin.." **Charlotte was having a tough time preventing Roz from causing bodily harm to her own mother and trying to watch my father.. Uncle Chucky couldn't get involved- naturally.. He actually _had_ to leave with her at the end of the day.. If he chose our side, like he's done in the past.. Well, he's in the dog house.. So to speak, with the worst woman in the world to piss off. So that left Emmett to stand beside my Father, similar to a stance I had moments ago.**"Wait.. Caroline said something about Bella running off with Peter.. What's going on Jasper?" **Emmett.. Finally.. His loud voice rang out over the women bickering. Everyone turned to face me.

"**Turns out Bella's had a reaction to some yellow jackets. While I was busy keeping my father and aunt Caroline from getting too biter with one another.."** Dad was glaring darts out his eyes to Caroline.I cleared my throat.. **"For the record Aunt Caroline, Bella and Emmett are apart of this family" **I could see the wheels turning in her head, waiting for that split second I'd let my guard down, just so she could get her own claws into me. Well, not this time..My voice began to raise over its usual cool and calm tone, **"And if you **_**cannot accept **_**that, **_**don't**_** come 'round here." **Her mouth closed completely, her lips forming a tight line. Instead of the easy looking perma-smirk she wore when the wheels turned in her twisted head. She finally was silenced, _this time_. **"Also, mama loved Emmett, loved him like her own. She loved dad.. Hell, she loved all of us. Don't you **_**ever**_** try to paint her love and her life as something different. You have no insight on dad and mama's relationship. Nor do you have any insight on any of the other relationships here.."** My voice raised again, nearly breaking from the tone and the volume. **"Quit sticking your nose where it **_**don't **_**belong."** I heard a slight grumble, from either Chucky or my Father.. I wasn't sure.**"Now, seeing as this is settled for now. I'm going to see to my girl. The rest of y'all, if you can't play nice then shut your fucking traps. This is Dad's day and your fucking it up."**

I walked inside, leaving everyone to heed my words. Especially my aunt. I went to my room first and grabbed my ring that I needed to wear before heading to the door.** "I'm coming with you."** I shrugged on my coat handing Roz her own. And then grabbed a coat for Bella. **"I'm sorry Jas-"**

"**Don't."** I raised my hands in front of her, placing them on her sombre looking face, tears threatened to pour out of her beautiful tranquil eyes, she was fighting them back.** "You don't owe me the fucking apology. You never have to apologize for her."** I brushed away the two tears that she couldn't hold back and kissed her forehead. **"Forget it."**

We took one of the cars to the hospital.. Not speaking a word. Instead I placed my hand on hers, trying to offer her some form of comfort when I heard her silently weeping, from the corner of my eye, I could see her hunched over almost trying to pull herself into her own body, trying to hide it from me. This perfect day was tarnished, like always.. By her mother.. I knew smack talking just brought the hurt out of everyone. Roz saw my mama as her own. The one who should've been her mama all along.

_

* * *

_

Since the time I was 5 and she was 3, baking cookies in the kitchen with mama before running outside and sweet little Roz would beat me over the head with my own little busted red fire truck when I was too much of a greedy bastard to share even one toy, thrusting a dirty Barbie at her saying

_**"You're a girl.. And li' girls don't play in the dirt an' mud with trucks Rosie"**__ Her comeback would always be, __**"So what I'ma girl. Mama Says I do wha'ever my li'heart wants so gimme the wed truck Jasper". **_

_I remember she would stay for months at a time and every time it rained, she'd run into my room.. Scared as hell and hug me all night, gripping me so tight she'd leave marks. My Aunt didn't even care. She'd drop Roz off and not even look back, wanting more of the life of money and no obligations to anyone but herself. Uncle Chucky, on the other hand would always come get her whenever he wasn't out of town. He loved her as much as I did. He was a real dad to her. To me even, when mine wasn't. Regardless of what blood ran in our veins, we were siblings. No one would tell us different._

_

* * *

_

"**Rose, baby.. You gotta smile, that pretty smile"** Recalling what Mama would always tell her whenever she showed that rare moment of her being so open and vulnerable. Showing the world how raw and tender she could be. She gave me a smile and laughed a little, embarrassed that I even quoted my mama as I pulled into the parking lot.

I saw Peter's brilliant bright hair before I even saw his face. I parked next to my truck, he had the top up tinkering with my baby. **"The hell you doing to my baby Pete?"  
"Your baby crapped out as I rushed your other one here smart ass."** his stupid smile appeared on his face.. It was the one smile I wish I could beat off his damn pretty face. Stupid Brother of hell. **"You killed my baby? Who knows, you could've killed my other one."  
"Well, your lucky I didn't just treat her as, 'oh she fainted she'll be better in a bit.' if I did, she'd be dead."**

"**What happened?"** Roz spoke up like a hard ass war vet. This girl was literally 10 seconds from having an emotional break down to being all about business. Holy fuck, she's been around us much too long.

"**I needed to get her mind off bitter Caroline and I succeeded in Jay's place. I made her dance with me, and man did we **_**dance. **_**She just, suddenly fainted on me. I thought that was kind of weird.. I checked her pulse when her glands were swelling up, which was even more out of sorts. Thankfully Charlotte wasted no time to heed my call and found the puncture marks from the stingers and there was this rash breaking out and spreading quickly, so I did what Jay would've done, minus freaking out and possibly driving the truck over a cliff." **He laughed. **"When I got her in here.. I said she was my sister-in-law and she flipped her shit when I had to leave her."**

I had to stop him. I didn't need the story about her being terrified and grabbing onto Peter for dear life. **"Thanks Pete. I thought the worst. I thought you actually hurt her. Like last time.""Hey! Acc-I-dent!" **he emphasized the word.

I thought back to that day about 3 months ago.

* * *

"**Who's up for a little touch football?"** Peter came running through the house screaming.

"**Oh, you better believe I'm in Petey."** Of course Emmett was always in to get physical. Any game that meant he could "injure" someone by accident without actually getting in shit for it.

"**If Emmett's in.. so am I!"**

I swung my whole body around to see my girl standing there beaming before jumping on Emmett's back and being spun around in circles.** "Hell yeah Bells!"**

"**You can't be the only girl playing Darlin that's much too unfair." **Peter came up behind me and slapped my back.

"'**Course not dear brother. Char, Roz, Angela and Kate are all in…. last one we're waiting on is you."** he poked my ? I've got to either play or be the medic?

"**Fine.. I'm in. Lord knows I can't play medic to all of y'all."**

"**Alright. Dale is out back with the rest of them.. Lets go!"**

Sure, last minute. What would they have done if we all said no?

I took off the things I was wearing, no point in getting valuable shit broken, noticing Bella was doing the same. She gave me a small smile and grabbed my arm.. Here's to dying on the lawn.

"**Okay, so Jay and I will be team captains." **Always with the rivalry.

I stepped forward leaving Bella behind me to "duke" out who would pick first. Please god, let it be me. Damn it. I picked Paper… he picked scissors. He was picking first. FUCK!

"**Hey Kate.. Get your fine ass over here, your on the winning team."** He fist bumped her.**"Let's take Peter down a notch shall we darlin?"** I nodded over my shoulder

"**Hmm. Dale.""Charlotte.."**He scowled at me, **"Emmett, get your big self over here."  
"Roz.. Join the good side."**

"**Angela."  
"Ryan"**

"**Game on Little brother."  
"Look who's fuckin' talking"** I bumped him with my chest before heading to my group. Silently hoping the women wouldn't need my interference.

"**Alright. Bella your small and quick.. I'll need you up front preventing them from getting back here. Stay on Dale and Kate when necessary"**We fist bumped.

"**Roz.. Honey.. We're stuck like glue.. Sorry Char"** I glanced at Charlotte, who did look a little disappointed.** "Me and Roz will be the legs.. Whenever you can feed it to one of us, do so because to Peter and Emmett we're virtually untouchable."  
"Ryan, look out for Emmett.. He's big and quick for his size. Watch his left side, he tends to favor it."**

I looked to Charlotte. **"You and Ryan are our last line of defence.. We've both got Peter."  
"Basically, look alive people.. Ryan.. You and I especially. We've got mostly women they can throw over their shoulders and run with if they get the chance.. So let's be prepared."**We all fist bumped and broke out of our circle, waiting on Peter.

"**Come on Petey! I'm creeping towards 80!"  
"WOOOO! Your going down Rosie.."** then he mouthed "I Love You"..Emmett can be such a fucking Meathead.

I argued that my side should get the ball because we had more girls.. And somehow Peter agreed. Big Mistake.

I got the ball, driving it back towards our goal line.. Sending it right to Rosalie who already was just a foot ahead and started blocking for her, paving the way down to our destination. Kate was nothing, I sent her to the ground. Just barely able to jump over her body, catching myself before I wiped out. Charlotte came up from the rear and tackled Dale to the ground, he groaned while she cheered.

I ducked and weaved through Angela.. making my way past Peter, he grabbed my sweater and I unzipped it, wiggling out of it before he could pin me to the ground.. laughing as my body slipped just out of his reach. I could hear someone screaming at me and didn't register who it was.. When I felt my body being lifted into the air before slamming into the ground. I heard cheering.. I just didn't know who's side it was.

I looked up to see Emmett's smiling face. **"Rise and shine pretty boy!" **Yeah, screw you. I was picked up by Roz. **"We're up by 1.. Can you do it again?" **Hell Yes.. I nodded while flipping Emmett off and jogged back to my side of the "field".

For the next 45 minutes we kept scoring one after the other.. It was getting annoying having to avoid my brother and getting pinned by Emmett every single time. The last few plays Peter would dodge me and go for Rosalie.. Picking her off the ground at one point and running her back down to our end..

Leaving me virtually screwed when all but Bella was being pinned so when I got the ball I fed it to her and slid out behind her causing the rest of Peter's so called defence to trip and fall over and on me, leaving Bella to make the Touchdown. No way I could've blocked them all. Peter's "steal" of the ball really pissed Roz off so naturally when the next play came around, she got him back. By tackling him into the ground with so much force he got dizzy momentarily as he stood up.

We were at the last play, the one that would decide the tie breaker. Everyone was huddled up and breathing heavily. I was now shirtless thanks to Peter ripping my shirt entirely in the last play by holding me back.

"**Alright, so I think this time, we're all just going to charge.. I'm going to feed the ball to Rosalie who'll feed it back to me and I'll pass it to you.. Darlin.. They won't expect it.. We'll play it off like we did in the last play.. Just be ready to run."**I was struggling to breathe, this was a bad ass cardio workout. We fist bumped and headed to the middle of the field.

Everything went according to plan. Emmett Pinned me to the ground before charging for Rosalie who was actively blocking for Bella. I got up and got in front of her.

"**Take it Jazz"**I took the ball from her and winced when she full on tackled Peter. They both fell into the mud.. Ouch. That has to be all sorts of pain right now. She got up and stayed with my long legs.. I was 5 feet from the finish when I heard Emmett's heavy ass Feet. I Grabbed Bella, putting the ball into her hands and turning around, completely stopped to a full speed Emmett boulder headed on a 1 way road to Jasper Hurtville, I shut my eyes, not wanting to see him any closer to me, bracing for impact.

I went flying past the finish line where I saw the ball on the ground.. We both fell, my back jerked off the ground twice against Emmett's otherwise heavy frame before sliding across the grass, giving myself grass burn or something of the sort. **"Fuck Emmett.. Get off of me."**

I flipped myself onto my feet, looking over on the ground where Peter was hunched over.

"**So? We won?"**

"**Shut up."** He spit blood on the grass.

"**What happened and where the hell is my girl at?"  
"Under me.. Dummy.. Help me up.."**

I grabbed his arm and he held onto my left side. **"Fuck. Where did Bella get that right hook and elbow.. Fucking A.."  
**I smiled. **"Who do you think Petey?"  
"Ahh Hell. You're a bastard. That shit hurts! Her fist hurts more than yours." **I grabbed Bella when she was ready to come off the ground.

"**I think you gave me a concussion Pete."**

The banter began between those two as I walked them both up to the house. I set Pete on the porch, because he just wouldn't go inside.

We continued inside, I picked her up completely and bolted upstairs into our bathroom.

"**Are you opposed to getting squeaky clean and then getting dirty again?"  
**She laughed as she spoke. **"That's exactly what I had in mind."**

I set her down and began taking off the rest of the clothes I still had on.. Her hand gripped my shoulder tightly and she whimpered, catching me completely off guard.

"**What's wrong Darlin?" **She shook her head.** "I'm alright. Sorry." **

I bent closer to her, **"I'll always be concerned honey.. Don't apologize.. Now get the hell in there will ya?"** I grabbed her naked firm butt and watched as she moved to get into the shower. God, this was long overdue. She cried out in pain, **"Oh god. Okay, yeah.. I'm not alright.. Oh God" **I lifted her up, swinging us back around to the counter. I set her on it and put my hands on either side of her. Her cries died down. **"What hurts?""I think.. Its my foot.. Something really hurts when I try to walk."**

I knelt down, taking a look at both of her feet. Her right foot was already bruising a nice red-blue color with the outer part of it beaming a crimson red. I barely touch her ankle when she screamed bloody murder.

"**Shh.. I'm sorry.. Come on, I think we need to get it checked out."  
"No. No. Its just tendonitis. Jasper, I'm sure its fine."  
"Don't think those bruises happen often with tendonitis nor do your cries of pain. Ease my mind, Please?"  
"Fine, we'll go but you do know if we wait 6 hours and find out its tendonitis, you owe me huge."**I smiled at her before I went to grab clothes.

"**Jasper, we still should shower.. I mean look at us."**We were dirty.** "Just help me keep my weight off my foot and it'll be fine I swear. I kept my weight off before you set me down and it was okay."**I didn't really like this idea. I didn't care if we were caked in cow manure and went to get her checked out, she was important.. I didn't care about the way we looked. Why the hell do I have to get all cleaned up? There isn't anyone outside this room I want to impress, except her. She already jumped into the shower, almost screaming in agony, she was trying to hide it.  
"**Jazz.."  
"Okay okay.. I'm coming."**

I washed her down as she washed whatever parts of me she could reach. God. I was too damn tempted just to take her right here right now. I knew better. I'd want her good and healthy first..

After we got to the hospital, we had to wait over 6 hours and then finally found out that her Achilles heel was ruptured and that she could have the torn tendon surgically put back together. We'd have to wait about 10 hours for an operating room to be open. So we were sent home with papers clearing her for surgery. She was right, we did wait 6 hours but it was a serious injury.

**

* * *

**

*Present Day*

I swear every time she's in this place now is because of Peter. I walked in the hospital with my head high, heading for the nurses station. Some of the nurses were ogling me. Get a grip ladies. I played with the ring on my finger and watched their faces fall. I asked for Bella's room and was taken to her without a question being asked.

She was sleeping. The nurse excused herself and went to get the doctor. I pulled the chair from the furthest corner of the room and pulled it right up next to my girl. She looked so peaceful in the bed. She sort of reminded me of my mama her last day alive. It was freaking me out but I knew she wasn't going to leave me. Her vitals looked good. She wasn't going anywhere. I just held her hand and kissed it repeatedly.

"**Hello. Mr…. Whitlock isn't it?"**

I stood up and took his hand. **"Yeah. That's me."**

"**I'm Dr. Carlisle Cullen."  
**Carlisle.. Where the hell have I heard that before? He glanced at her chart and made a note in it before looking at me. "**Well, I do have good news for you.. Isabella is doing fine. We took care of the allergic reaction and I've put in for some new epi pens for her. I have given her a sedative to keep her calm since she was a bit disoriented when she came in, but other than that I see no reason for you to take her home in the morning. Just let her rest tonight."** He smiled at me before walking out of the room.

I took my place beside my girl and my hand found its familiar spot. I succumbed to sleep a while after. The constant beeping of the machines finally became my lullaby.

I began to dream. I could see Bella's face, twisted in pain.. Tears were running down her face, her voice was slightly muffled.

* * *

"**I yelled for Carlisle and we made it to him. I remember holding Dad's jacket and his hand.. Telling him he was going to be fine. Esme was trying to help Carlisle with the bleeding…Carlisle came in after 10 minutes telling me Dad had to rest. I leaned over to kiss his cheek and he kissed me back…That night, Carlisle said his injuries were much worse then thought. He was bleeding internally and they couldn't find it fast enough… he died 3 hours after I left him." **

* * *

I woke up in a cold sweat. The sun shone through the windows.. I got up, heading to the bathroom to make myself not look like I woke up like I did. Bella would freak out wondering why I look so hurt. I hurt because she did. Last thing she needed right now was to know I was dreaming back to that night when she opened herself completely to me, letting all the old wounds be cut open and allowing herself to bleed and relive the most worst pain in her life. I didn't need to depress her. I splashed cold water on my face when my thoughts began to drift.

_She was telling me about her father. The night with Edward that changed everything for her. _Shit. Carlisle Cullen. The man who followed his son's twisted mind and did everything he could to hide his son's mistakes, he covered it up. And he was her doctor? No wonder he fucking sedated her, she was freaking out over him and no one was here for her, fuck!

I went back to her side, she was still out like a light. I looked at my watch, it was already 10 Am. I just stared at her sleeping form. Her mouth was parted open slightly, her hair was up and out of her way, spread out across her pillow, above her. I smiled. She was a damn vixen in a pair of scrubs and sleeping in a hospital bed. I barely registered the knock on the door, I jumped to my feet, startled when I heard the door open.

"**Fuck, you scared me."  
"Sorry. Thought maybe you'd need clothes and Coffee. Bella too." **I looked at Rose. She _WAS_ my sister, wearing the same damn thing from yesterday. Her nice little black party dress. The only thing that was different was her hair was pulled back and her makeup was actually smudged a bit on her face.  
"**Did you stay all night honey?"  
"Yeah. Both Peter and I did. Besides, I heard Carlisle was around and I wasn't going to give him a chance of being in here." **She basically did what I did when it clicked in my head. Although, I still wouldn't have left her alone regardless. **"He's her doc. No wonder she flipped when Pete left her."  
"You've got to be kidding me? I don't understand why he's always treating her. Well, I'll go get her release papers so we don't have to see him again."**

I nodded taking the bag and coffee tray from her. **"Thanks Rosie. You didn't have to stay."  
"Nonsense. We're family. Besides, I would'a killed my mother if we left." **I laughed as she kissed my cheek and left the room.

I just stood there sipping my coffee, trying to stretch a little and just looked at her.  
"**Quit staring, your creeping me out Whitlock."  
"Sorry hon. Your tempting me here, you look fabulous."  
"Shut up."  
**I complied and handed her a coffee and put the bag of clothes on her bed before taking a seat on her bed beside her. **"You must've freaked out. I'm sorry."  
"Don't be, all that matters is that your fine."** I smiled at her as I leaned in to kiss her pretty face.

"**Mmm I love you."**

"**I love you too Darlin"**

3 Raps on the door followed 2 minutes later.

"**Good morning Swan."  
"Hi Rosa-Did you stay here too?" **I noticed Bella's mouth was opened in a big 'O' probably noticing that Rosalie's perfectly made up face wasn't all that perfect at the moment.  
"**Yeah. No harm done, my mother on the other hand.. Is in for it."  
"I'm so sorry for fighting with her."  
**Wait… What? **"You fought with Caroline?" **She waived it off, about to open her mouth when she snapped it shut and pulled me closer to her, she was trembling slightly.

"**Ahh, Good morning Isabella. It's good to see you awake. I am prepared to send you home. I do need to check your vitals so if Rosalie and Mr. Whitlock would be so kind to leave the room for a moment while I get you ready to leave."**Her nails dug into the arm closest to her, I'm sure the doc didn't notice and I tried my best not to wince.

"**No. They stay. Anything you need to do, you can do it in front of them. Its nothing they haven't seen before."** There was a hard tone to her voice, it rang out with a lot of strength behind it. I made no effort to move. I was permanently chained to her, where I'd be forever. The doc did his check and signed papers that Roz had before giving them to me to sign and walked out of the room. **"Be careful next time Isabella. Those yellow jackets can be relentless."**Soon as the door shut she gave him the finger as Roz took a pose on the far wall near the door, one leg bent, foot touching the wall. **"Swan, Whitlock.. Get a damn move on before he comes back in here with some stupid excuse. You know he will."**I helped her out of the bed and let her get changed.

"**I'll get Pete to bring the car around. I already had your truck towed to the garage. I'll look at it after we get out of here."  
"Thanks Rose. I owe you."  
"You don't owe me a thing."**I watched as she walked out of the room, man.. I'm so glad she knows her way around cars and the like, if she didn't, I'd be spending the reunion with Bella walking home. Not something I wanted to do at the moment..

She changed and I didn't bother. We dropped the papers off at the nurses station and they made Bella sit in a wheelchair, protocol. I-all but ran us to the waiting car. We got in and headed home. She snuggled up next to me and slept. I ran my fingers through her hair and shuddered at the thought if Peter didn't think something was really wrong, I'd be burying her body instead of admiring it, holding her near.

Soon as the car stopped in front of the ranch, I picked up sleeping beauty and headed inside, carrying her up the stairs quickly when I heard Caroline's voice drift through the kitchen into the foyer. God, she makes my blood boil sometimes. I laid Bella down and tucked her in.

I kissed her forehead, lingering a moment. _I'll be right back Darlin.._

I shut the door quietly and headed downstairs, rolling up my shirt and unbuttoning the first two buttons. **"Honestly Peter. You cannot just let Jasper marry that… that.. tramp! You know you cannot support that. I won't support it!"**

I walked into the kitchen, clearing my throat.

Caroline jumped **"Oh Jasper! Thank goodness your back."** _Yeah, right.  
_**"Caroline, I'm going to make myself perfectly clear.. When Bella feels up to coming down here and mingling with everyone.. You are to keep your mouth shut if you have nothing nice to say. I'm not going to let you try to berate my girlfriend, I know you aren't happy with my choice, but you know what? Just take that bottle of lemon juice add some salt and swallow it. She isn't going anywhere."**

"**I'm glad she's okay."** she tried to hide her grimace.

**"Just so you know, I will marry the beautiful, strong, stubborn, witty and fun-loving girl up there. I hope we have little dirty blond haired babies that have her eyes, my smile and her loving nature.. I know you'll never let go of Tanya.. But just remember you hurt Charlotte when you try to stab that one in me, and when you hurt her.. You hurt my brother and I'm not fine with that." **  
I changed the topic. I was sick of this.**"Major, My truck's dead so, I'm out a car. I'll be out to do the horses soon. I'm just going to shower and check on some things."**I walked out before either of them had a chance to say anything. I saw Bella sitting on the stairs. **"You shouldn't be here Darlin. You should be sleeping."  
"Soon as you left I couldn't sleep. And now I know why."** Her face scrunched up as she stood in front of me on the stairs, standing almost as tall as I.

"**Come on. Don't listen to that crap."  
"I just, don't want to come between you and your family."  
"Darlin, **_**you are my family**_**.. Nothing is going to come between you and me.. And **_**our**_** family and us. Come on, I have some cuddle time that I believe was being neglected yesterday." **I picked her up, lifting her over my shoulder, I couldn't stop my own laughter as she giggled in protest as I walked up the staircase.

"**Don't you go and drop her!"** My dad's voice shouting through the house. I laughed even harder when I heard her stifling a laugh and took the stairs two at a time until we were in our room.

We laid together for quite some time. Drifting in and out of consciousness leaving sweet, little kisses all over each other and just being wrapped up in each other. Our legs were curled together, her hair found its way to my chest and her hand kept a firm hold on one of the loops on my jeans. My arms stayed wrapped around her body as my head touched her shoulder. It was as if we ran far away and we were in another world. Just her and I.

After about a few hours I screamed at myself mentally, I wasn't looking forward to tearing myself away from the glowing, beautiful brunette that lay tangled up in me. I knew I had to get up and tend to the horses. The work a man's gotta do sometimes…

* * *

The week flew by catching me off guard. I didn't even realize it was the following Sunday until I heard Elvis being played through the house, it was too early for Elvis. I took a look a the clock and it was only 9am. Well, at least my dad had the decency to wait a few hours. My arm stretched over to the other half of my bed, it was empty. What the..?I climbed out, god. I really have to stop this sleeping in, gotta start getting up at the crack of dawn again. I put on some clothes and headed downstairs, I peeked into the living room and saw the biggest smile on my old man's face. He and Bella were slow dancing, I heard her giggles which fuelled his smile to get even bigger.. She's like a damn brush fire, amazing, and fast the heat burning you to the very core. She was my favourite kind of fire.

I ate breakfast in silence wanting to give them privacy. With my aunt not making her appearance, Bella was more comfortable and the old man didn't have to always be on the offence with me dealing with the defence. That's now Roz' job. I chuckled at the thought of Thursday night.

* * *

_****(LAST THURSDAY FLASHBACK)****_

We all sat for dinner, Charlotte and Bella were simply amazing together. Making all the food for this family, making it smell good and actually succeeding at keeping us men out of the kitchen. That was the hardest job of all. Of course, I set the table as the two of them would bicker at my brothers, uncle, and father. I envied them, only because they would've been my distraction.. I could be in there right now stealing bits of food. I listened to all the whistling and the constant snapping of the women at all the failed attempts for food and laughed as I just awaited dinner.. I knew I'd get a pie or something for "good behaviour".

"**Alright. Dinner is served."** The two of them were beaming.

I pulled out a chair for Bella, naturally before taking a seat beside her and set an arm on top of her chair, my hand was strumming on her shoulder slightly, a little melody I was thinking about, she eased into a relaxed pose in the chair. The past few days have been really awkward and nerve wracking on her. I kissed her shoulder before lightly kissing her ear and could see my aunt trying to hide her grimace from a few seats down from us, I told her she'd have to deal.

We said grace and the cutlery was the only sound in the room. Everyone was too hungry and the food was too delicious to even bother with small talk. There was an overflow of chicken, turkey, sweet potatoes, veggies.. God. The buns. I think the buns were my favourite part. They were made from scratch. I almost couldn't stop myself from moaning and being the cookie monster over those damn buns. Bella just looked at me with this sweet innocent smile on her face_. _

_Ain't nothing innocent about you honey._

I leaned over letting my lips touch her ear, **"This is absolutely amazing. You are too good Darlin"** I watched as her cheeks started heating up a little bit, I kissed the rush of pink that was replacing her slightly tanned face. Of course my eyes wondered a little more south towards her glorious freshly tanned breasts, no one noticed of course.. Bella did and elbowed me.

A glass was tapped calling everyone's attention. Emmett stood up, with a serious façade and a smile on his face. **"Seeing as though we've got the Major's birthday out of the way.. My dear Rosie and I.."** Rose stood up, turning absolutely red, she was blotchy. The hell's got her so worked up for?

"**You can expect a little hybrid of the two of us in 6 months."** Roz just began laughing, I could hear the cracks in her voice. God, she's so scared and so overjoyed at the same time. I was the first to jump up and hug her. I pulled her tightly to me, muffling the tears that now fell from her eyes as her body shook into mine. **"Don't worry Roz. You know I've got you"** I whispered in her ear. I could hear dad's laughter and toasting filling the room with Charlotte and Bella's delighted screams. I hope that one day, that'll be Bella and I.

* * *

***PRESENT DAY***

"**Penny for your thoughts"**

"**I'll offer you a million for yours." **I smiled. Looking up, meeting a tight lipped smile.

"**You don't want to know what goes on in my mind."  
**Ha. Right. **"Just try, fill me in because I don't ever get you. Not anymore."**

"**I'm sorry I've been so hard on y'all. I really am. Ever since Rosalie announced she was expecting its been a wakeup call."  
"Why now though? You've never just done a complete 180."** this damn woman was scaring me.

"**I guess, just watching how terrified my own daughter was to break the news that she was starting a family. She should be happy, not terrified. That's not how I want this family to be." **Too late.  
**"Well, maybe you should've thought of that before you tried to force her into an arranged marriage all those years ago. Not to mention you never approved of who really loves her.. And honestly, in the end what matters more? Good southern blood? Or the fact that Rose is so damn happy and content. She's safe and loved, she's adored and she found someone to balance her out."  
**Her voice took on a more sombre tone. **"Yes. I know that. I knew when she ran off and got married to.. Emmett."  
"See that wasn't so hard to say."**

"**Thing is, I was doing what I thought was best for all of you."** her voice was soft. Was she really trying to get me to pity her?  
I scoffed at her, trying to force my bubbling rage down. **"Really Caroline? Where were you when she was 3? When you would run off around the world not givin' a damn about her?" **I found myself letting it spill out.. **"**_**Where were you **_**when she needed her **_**mama**_**.. And had to settle for mine and me and Peter? **_**Where were you **_**when she would **_**constantly**_** say how much she missed you and wished for your return all the time? Oh right, you were **_**too busy **_**for your little girl..**

**Newsflash.. You're about 22 years too late. You forget she's 26.. She's no longer a little girl, nor are we little boys. You don't have any sort of say in our lives.. I'm happy Peter said fuck you and that Rosalie never fucking listened to you. You don't know what Rosalie needs or wants, **_**you never cared when she was a child, why should you care now? **_**She's much stronger and much smarter then you think she is. She made the **_**right**_** choice with Emmett. No one will protect her better or love her better than we will but Emmett? Emmett.. comes pretty damn close. Do you **_**really **_**think I'd let some scum bag into my sister's life? You better think again. What you think is the best for us, is our **_**own personal hell**_**"**

I took a deep breath, I don't know why the hell I was always defending myself or the people I love around her.

"**What's happened to you Jasper? Has that girl changed you so completely you don't realize it? If Tanya was here.." **I saw _RED.. _God If she was a man, I'da swung at her already. Fuck.  
**"**_**Tanya**_**.. Is dead.. I **_**took**_** her **_**beautiful life **_**from her Caroline."** I punched the counter beside me, something, anything than her right now. She jumped when my fist connected. I punched it a second time, I was beyond frustrated.  
**"You still love her. Oh Jasper. You do need to deal with the pain over her death." **Both of my hands slammed down on the counter using my body weight. **"I've fucking dealt with it already. I just hate how you **_**always**_** throw it in my damn face. I don't need you reminding me that I'm the reason she's gone. You need to get over this sick obsession you have.. Tanya is **_**gone. No more. **_**Bella is my **_**life**_**, she's the only one for me.."  
"But.. You.."**

Oh hell no.** "You know the saying 'insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results'? Maybe you need to think about that phrase. Because well.. you're already fucking insane."**

I threw my dishes into the sink and let them crash together before bolting out of the kitchen and shoving on my shoes, grabbing some keys and headed outside. I probably just ruined the good time Bella and my dad were having, at this point, I just needed out. I couldn't take this from someone who is supposedly my aunt. I didn't need her endless bickering about all of us apparently, destroying our lives. I took off running. The heat was too much to bare, I didn't care, I needed distance. I just needed away from all of her poison. I hopped the fence and kept running and didn't stop until I reached the end of the field, end of the property.

I fell onto the rough grass and let the sun hit my face, burning me with its intense, bright white rays. I let my thoughts drift to my mama.

_**

* * *

**_

********Few years ago.**********

Walking into her room was eerie. She always had her big beautiful smile, on her face.. Always lightening up my world.

"**Jasper.. Come here sweetheart. My Darling boy." **I smiled wasting no time in crossing the room and giving her a hug. She weighed less today, she was turning into a bag of bones right in front of me. This wasn't good.

I felt her soft lips kiss my forehead and cheeks. **"Hi mama. Still as beautiful as ever."** She laughed.

"**Quit tryin' to flatter me."  
"I'm not. It's the truth, your absolutely stunning mama."**

I grabbed her hand and helped her sit in her chair, looking out into the fields.

"**You've got to stop letting Caroline get to you honey." **I locked eyes with her. My mama. Always fucking knew.

"**She has no say in your life Darlin.. As long as you love someone, its none of her business. If you and Tanya end up getting married then so be it. If not, then that's okay too. I don't want you doing anything that doesn't make you happy. Remember that when I'm gone baby."  
"Don't talk like that Mama."  
"Shh. Its true. You know I don't have much time left. I just want you to know, your happiness is everything to me. Yours, Peter's, Rosie's and your fathers. Everything else comes second sweetie."**

I nodded. Not wanting to fight with her. Her happiness and well-being meant more than my own happiness. I knew she didn't have a lot of time left. She was my sunshine, my light.. My reason for living.

"**Besides, you know Caroline. She's constantly doing the same thing over and over again and always expecting different results. Damn woman is insane."  
"Poor Chuckles."** We both laughed at the comment we'd always say together.

**

* * *

**

*PRESENT DAY*

I got up off the ground and walked back to the main property. I didn't want to face Caroline anytime soon so I decided to get to fixing the barn. I started by ripping apart the stuff that was no longer useable and figuring out the best way to fix this roof and part of the room without having it destroyed again.

My knee started killing me, this was annoying when it started acting up. It never was set right after the accident so many years ago. Too bad Tanya couldn't have just had my injuries. Why did that have to happen? Not only to me but, to Charlotte. I know she doesn't hate me, she's the opposite.. But fuck.. If that accident hadn't have happened, I wouldn't be in this pain.. Charlotte wouldn't look at me sometimes with such sadness.. I wish I could take it all back. But, I can't.

I need to work through this pain, no letting it get me down.. Knee pain or Caroline? No contest! Knee pain for the rest of my life.. Thank you!I extracted the entire roof from the barn and decided it might be safe to head back, before working on this again tomorrow.

I slowly made my way to the house, trying to ignore the shooting pain within my knee.. There weren't any cars in the driveway and none in the garage.. that's weird. There's not even a car for me if I needed one. What's going on?

Hobbling into the house I was attacked with the smell of a roast. Oh great! They all ate and probably left me a baby slice! The guys are going to get an earful from me. _Fuckers. _I needed ice and painkillers.

"**Hello! Anyone home?"** I had to check and make sure… and no one answered me.

Great.

The pain was becoming unbearable, I took most of my weight off my knee and made it down the hall into the kitchen. I just grabbed a towel and some ice and then grabbed some pain killers, popping them into my mouth and awaiting the relief.

I all but ran out of the kitchen, really wanting to sit down and remedy my stupid bum knee.

"**What did you do babe?"**

Slender arms wrapped around my frame, willing to take my weight.

"**Stupid bum knee."**

"**You idiot. Of course it happens when I try to make us have a nice night alone."  
"Sorry Darlin"  
**She just smiled at me and walked me to the couch. **"Do you need anything?"** I finally got a good look at her. She was dressed in a nice deep red dress with her hair tied back and looked all fresh and clean. Damn, of course my own knee cock blocks me. **"Yeah, I wish I was more able to do this night with you but. No.. I'm fine. You don't need to serve me."  
"Its fine, we can have another night… what did you end up doing today?"  
"I started the reno on the barn, hopefully I can get some help tomorrow on it and it shouldn't take more than a day."**

She hummed as she slid her hands up my shirt, her fingers took a lazy, slow trail up my body.. It felt so good. I let out a breath I didn't think I was holding, my eyes slowly closed and I let my brain go into sensor overload.

"**Come on cowboy, let's put you to bed."**

I don't know how she did it but the heels were gone and Bella was all but carrying me bridal style up the stairs and into our room. My little mighty mouse.

The pain killers and Bella's nursing me put me to sleep.

I woke up confused and disoriented.  
Where the fuck am I? Thank god I'm in my room..  
My knee still throbbed.. The forgotten food and….

Oh god. I got cock blocked by my own body.

DAMN IT!

I got out of bed carefully and headed to the bathroom to fill myself with some painkillers.

Upon walking back to my bed I stopped in complete Awe of what my eyes were seeing. She was laying on her back with a small smile on her beautiful face. She wasn't wearing any makeup and looked flawless. The sun was hitting her skin making it glow and her hair was everywhere. I couldn't delay this anymore. This was my perfect moment.

I left our room briefly to go to my dad's room. I really shouldn't be walking on my knee right now because it hurts so bad. Thankfully, the pain didn't let up so it was constantly throbbing to remind me.

I knocked quietly, not wanting to wake anyone else up.. I heard him tell me to come in.  
"**Hey Dad? Still got that ring for me and.. Do you know where my brace is?"  
"How the hell do you not lose your damn head?"**  
He scowled at me. **"I've got both of them right here. Good luck and go rest up, that'll only get worse."  
"Thanks."  
"Yeah… Yeah."  
**I made my way back to our room.. Being as quiet as a mouse.

"**What are you doing?"  
"SHIT!" **I jumped, literally, in the air.** "Don't scare me like that darlin"  
"Sorry, but why are you creeping about instead of being asleep?"  
"I just needed to get my brace on, my knee was killing me." **She pulled me back into our room and sat me down on the bed.

"**Bella… I need to.."  
"Jasper.. I need to.." **We laughed at ourselves.  
"**Go head darlin"  
"No you go."**Again, saying this at the same time. She kept telling me to go ahead so..

Here goes nothing.

"**Since the moment you crashed into me, I knew you were the one thing to make my life complete. Now, this isn't how I pictured doing this.."**I grabbed both of her tiny, soft hands into my rough and tough big ones.

"**I love you and I'll continue to love you until my very last breath.. I cannot picture my life without you by my side."**My heart sped up, my hands got sweaty, my breathing got erratic, I was on the verge of passing out.

"**I'd be the happiest man on earth if you made an honest man out of me. Bella, will you do me the greatest honour of my life and be my wedded wife?"**

"**No."** She was crying profusely.

"**Darlin… what.. I..I know we ain't doing this proper but.."  
**Her hands covered my mouth and she was shaking her head no.  
The tears were just pouring down her face, her eyes were already red. She was trying to speak through her sobs but nothing really came out.

Her beautiful face, her body.. everything... the Answer was _NO._

She's saying no. She doesn't want this life. She doesn't want this, she doesn't want me. Period.

_No._

* * *

*DUCKS!*  
Please don't throw anything at me yet! I hope to update sometime this week.. School and internet permitting!

Until then- All who read this..  
_**PLEASE REVIEW**_! I _can't update quickly _when there isn't any reviews.. And I don't know how I'm doing without feedback!


	53. AN: STOLEN LEMON

To all my readers…

03/01/2011 4:24 AM Eastern

Just as I was going to update this story… I was going through some other fanfics for Bella and Jasper.

I came across one fanfic that actually _**STOLE**_ a Lemon of mine.

The story is called "We Found Each Other" By XxJasperWhitlocklvr95xX _Chapter 14 of that story has __**MY Lemon**__._ I went through their reviews and they have posted it around 10-20-2010..(Oct 20th. 2010)

The Chapter of THIS story they have taken it from is **Chapter 29**. Which, Some of you reviewed within a day or so.. But my reviews are _**DATED 12-22-2009.**_ Meaning, Mine was UP FIRST. There is a link below of how this Person blandly STOLE part of my story. You can look and compare for yourself without actually having to SEARCH through the two stories. The Lemon is basically the same missing some lines.

What I just Screen capped: Mine: . Stolen: .

And if you do want to search, be my : .net/s/5550862/29/Crashed_Into_You Stolen: .net/s/6211587/14/We_found_each_other

Until I get them to take it down or do something about this… I won't be posting any updates to this story,

You all have that person to thank. Because frankly, I'm this CLOSE to doing something severely drastic to my characters.


	54. As Perfect As It Will Get

_**I'M REALLY SORRY IT TOOK ME SO LONG TO POST AGAIN.**_

_**When my lemon was stolen from me, It took me quite a long time to find the inspiration to write again. I just needed to step back and listen to what my Characters wanted to say.**_

_**I'm back and hopefully you guys old/new followers have enjoyed my story thus far. Here's a little bit of what I've got so far. I promise not to stray too far away ever again.**_

_**Special shootout to Jjcullen for your message! Thank you!**_

_**Thanks to all my loyal readers for staying with me thus far!**_

Please REVIEW!

* * *

_Is she serious? I have to be dreaming._

_Keep it together. _I got out of the bed and began to pace the room. _Just… keep it together. Breathe. You're okay. It's okay._

Fuck Keeping it together.

**"Don't even let Caroline stop this. I don't care what she thinks. I only care about us."** I nearly broke. I was close to breaking down and crying.. But I was so close to tearing apart my room and letting my red eyed demon out.. Let him inflict his wrath on the entire house.

**"If your answer is no, then why the fuck are you still here with me? Huh? Why am I even wasting my fucking time thinking and planning a future with you? When you obviously don't want this to go any further? I don't know if you've realized.. we ain't getting any fucking younger!"** This shit hurts. I tried to keep my breathing and my voice under control but it was becoming difficult. I took my hand and swiped everything off my dresser, some of it flying to hit my bedroom door, clattering on the floor. I couldn't even bother to hear her response, **"If you supposedly love me, why cant you fucking marry me? What's so wrong about us, about all of this that's making you say no?"**

She sat up and walked right over to me.

**"Jasper. Calm down. I said no because I couldn't **_**believe**_** all this. I was actually planning to ask **_**you **_**to marry me. You idiot."**

_What._

The.

Fuck.

That was unexpected. **"See look…"** She walked over to the closet and digging from the bottom of her side of it. **"I'm not kidding. We both have been planning this for a while. I was going to ask you last night but with your knee and you just passing out on me, I decided to wait."**She threw the red velvet box into my hands, while walking away and I opened it, grabbing her arm so she couldn't leave the room.

It was white gold and yellow gold. Gold on the edges and white gold in the middle.

I snickered. It was plain but perfect, the exact engagement ring I snagged for Bella but the band was a bit thicker.

I showed her the ring I was going to give her…** "Well.. Darlin.. The way I see it is… the gentleman gets down on one knee, professes his love to his one and only."**She giggled and sobbed at the same time.

**"You burned me the first time… you gon' do it again?"  
**She pushed me slightly. **"No. shut up and get on with this Jasper."**

Here I Go again. **"My entire life, I always thought the lord was playing games with me. Just giving me things to take them away, its like I was just a child constantly being teased. I actually thought, you'd walk away from me.. That.. You would just wake up one day, realize my crap wasn't worth the time and energy and that you'd just pack up and leave me in your dust. That God would be punishing me again. Turns out I was wrong because he finally gave me you. He finally decided that I was worthy. Worthy of a woman who was out of my league. I think I finally realized how worthy I am.. and its all because of you. You make me a better person, a better man. I love you, for everything you've done for me and my family."**

I took a deep breath and continued.  
**"You deserve a man who will be there in good times and in bad. Who will hold your hair back when your sick, who will do stupid things to make you laugh.. Show you everyday just how amazingly beautiful and wonderful you are. Who will do anything for your well-being, take you on spontaneous trips, watch girly movies just because you want to. Share everything and nothing at the same time. The other half you were always looking for to finally be complete. Let me add some chaos in your peaceful existence. Be a real man to a real woman. Let me be that man for you." **I grabbed her small, soft tanned hand and whispered, **"I'd be lying if I didn't say we wouldn't have some real crazy loving making nights somewhere in there too."** she laughed and lightly slapped my arm with her other hand.

**"Darlin, in all seriousness… Would you please do me the honour of showing me everyday your colourful, perfect world, gracing me with your twinkling smile, your beauty, your ever graceful personality and teach me how to be an even better man, better person, better lover and a better husband? Show me the meaning of happiness, make me fall in love with you all over again, every moment of every single day. Wake up to me everyday as my wife.. Darlin, Will you marry me?" **

She just nodded as she slid down to the floor, where her head came in contact with my shoulder and she sobbed. **"Yes." **barely came out. I can't lie. I was tearing up myself. Finally! _FINALLY!_

We just stayed there kneeled on the floor for a while as I had her in a bone crushing hug when the happy sobbing ..between the both of us, I think?.. Began to die down.

Her small hands finally touched my chest and I inhaled a little bit. Every touch was electrifying! She pushed me onto my back, laying on top of me, her eyes were still watery, red and puffy. Her cute nose had the sniffles, her hair was in wild disarray and she had the most beautiful wide mouth smile I had ever seen. God be damned. She was perfect.  
**"You know, your kind of adorable right now."** Her hand ran up my back and settled in my hair, playing with it.  
**"Really? 'Cause.."** I flipped us over, so I'd be laying on top of her, my elbows supporting some of my weight. **"You look absolutely beautiful."  
****"I love you, cowboy."** Her nose rubbed mine playfully while her hand was pulling me in for the slowest, sweetest kiss I think I've ever experienced.

Eventually, Peter had to come in and just had the perfect cock block timing. _Asshole._

"**Hey, get the hell up lovebirds. Come on outside when you're presentable looking. And That means a shower Jay!"** His fading laughter was more like maniacal. This couldn't be good.

After I helped Bella up, I held in the screams of burning, searing pain that were threatening to come out as I stood up. Fuck, come on. You can do this. My knee was locked into place during our carpet rendezvous.. My fists clenched together as I began the slow process of straightening my knee. The fire that was building was completely unbearable. I was close to tears.

Finally, my knee straightened out with a snap, my knee cap apparently being popped back into place and I found myself no longer able to hold in the pain. I groaned and cried out in complete agony.

**"Oh my god. Aaaaaaah."  
"Jasper?" **My eyes fluttered open and through my teary eyes I could see Bella through my blurry eyes.  
Her hands on my shoulders, **"What… what do you need? Whats wrong?"  
"Top shelf, bathroom. Pain killers." **She bolted to the bathroom. I heard the door fly open and then shut.  
"**How many?"  
"Fuck. 4 of them." **Soon as I took them, here was ms. mighty mouse again, carrying me to bed.  
**"Honey, I'm fine. Its okay. Knee just locked up is all."  
"You scared me. For a second.."  
"Shh.. It's okay. I think I scared myself by calling out. Heh." **She rubbed my back.. We sat there not saying a word.  
**"So much for being our perfect morning."  
"Hey, its still perfect. You're here. Now, go get your fine ass in that shower."**

**"Yes, sir!"  
**I knew there was one more thing that needed to happen before we got ready to go downstairs.

"**Hey Darlin.."** She stopped mid step and turned to face me,** "I'm really sorry.. Beyond sorry for goin' off like that. I had no right to do so. I shouldn't have let my emotions get the best of me. Can you forgive me?"  
**She looked down at the floor.  
Oh No.I held my breath. Any punishment, would be deserved.

**"Of course I forgive you. You can be a real asshole about it though. Jeez. Although, I do understand why you went off like you did. Its not easy trying to deal with **_**some members**_** of your family and I can understand why you jumped to conclusions. Don't worry Jasper. Anything you dish out, I'm sure I can handle.. And if not, I've got Peter Sr. and Jr. on my side.. Oh and Charlotte. She'll handle you better then your father and brother could."**

She laughed as she left the room. **"Oh and clean up that mess you made!"** then the bathroom door was locked and the shower turned on.

**"Yes Ma'am."**

I cleaned up my mess and stripped the bed, putting new sheets on it and pilled the dirty ones with our dirty clothes before taking the whole thing downstairs to the washing machine. I threw the first load that was done into the dryer. Charlotte's doing no doubt, since the other men in this house can't do laundry to save their damn lives. I flipped the machine on and headed back upstairs where I heard tooth brushing happening.

**"Babe?"  
"Yeah Darlin?"  
"Go ahead and hop in, I'm going to get the laundry started, do you want anything to eat while I'm down there?" **I walked into the bathroom, sinful in grey underwear. Damn. I just stood there, taking it all in.  
**"Jasper?"  
"Uh.. Yeah."** I cleared my throat, **"I, uh… I did the laundry. Don't worry about food. I'm sure it's all outside. Just get yourself dressed before I delay our morning any longer."  
****"Not that I'd mind but.. We do have something to announce."**

Damn it. Damn it. That's what I forgot. I walked over to the floor, where I had put the ring and walked back in the bathroom, slipping it onto her finger and planted a nice wet one on her. Haha.

**"Eww. God Jasper! Could you be anymore disgusting?"  
"You liked it. Course I can. Get in the shower with me and I'll show you just how disgusting I can be."** I gave her a slow kiss and winked for good measure and her face was just beat red.  
"**Shut up and shower, stop tormenting me. Jerk."  
****"You started it." **I whined playfully.  
"**You've ended it." **She had a point.

I began my shower as I heard her huff a moment later, she was brushing her teeth again. I was silently chuckling my head off as I tried to get the hell out of the shower as quickly as possible. If Charlotte came up, we'd have an even bigger problem. Even though I already had one of my own.

I dried off and got dressed in record time for Bella to be finished with her hair. She wasn't really wearing any makeup. A simple sliver chain around her neck, a red blouse with a white wife beater underneath and black shorts. I opted for my usual jeans and a white dress shirt, nothing underneath. It wasn't see through so I really didn't need to "dirty" another shirt.

I couldn't resist. My arms found her body, my hands on her lower back and at the base of her neck respectively. I leaned in, my tongue and lips exploring her mouth and lead her over to the bed. Fuck breakfast. We could see them later.

She moaned into my mouth as my body roughly met hers. This was long overdue. For both of us. I left her mouth and began my trip down her neck and opening her blouse, she was already grinding into me, just as ready as I was… Her soft finger tips working on the buttons on my shirt, starting from the bottom to the top, soon as the buttons were all undone, her hands slipped inside my shirt and grasped my shoulders roughly as I shrugged my shirt off. Damn. "**Jazz…" **She grabbed me even harder, walking backwards faster.** "Ooooh Jazz…" **I was still exploring her collarbone that was left exposed by her shirt. She fall back, pulling me with her. **"Jazz.. Please.. " **It all came out in breathless moans.

I just grunted as her hips really found the right pressure against my dick.  
**"Yee-ss dar-lin."** I thrusted back into her even harder, making us both moan in ecstasy. My lips found hers again, I kissed her roughly, sucking and biting her sinful lips. So damn irresistible.

**"Oh god. As much.. As I'd love to do this… we really need to get downstairs."  
"You cannot be serious" **I groaned as my head moved to above her shoulder, onto the pillow behind her.  
**"I am."** Her arms were encouraging me to get up.  
**"Damn woman, you're worse then Peter. You're suppose to encourage me, not discourage."** Reluctantly.. I peeled myself off of her and fixed my clothes.  
She took a minute to run her hands over her shirt and to breathe, **"I'm sorry, I'll make it up to you."  
"I'll be expecting you to."  
**

* * *

****We made our way downstairs when she stopped me slightly.

**"Would it be horrible to say, I sincerely hope Caroline isn't here?"  
**I laughed. **"I was just about to think the same thing. It's not bad. I don't blame you at all darlin."  
**She laughed and we finally made our way down the stairs and through the kitchen, towards the back of the house, outside where everyone was.

**"Good morning!"**

**"Good morning everyone."** I didn't see Caroline on the deck, thank goodness.

**"I was wondering how long you'd keep her hidden. We're all friendly here. Come on over Sweetheart, there's a seat next to me." **Good ol' Chucky, smiling like a goof, plate full of food and still making people feel welcome instead of stuffing his face.

Bella laughed a little as she made her way over to Chucky. I opted for the seat near little David who was quite happy with throwing his pieces of mangled up toast and fruit everywhere.

**"Hey little man. Gimme a high five Davey"** I stuck out my hand and he squealed loudly before doing a funny burp- giggle and throwing a piece of apple my way. **"Okay.. Looks like I've got to teach you some things.. Silly boy." **I picked up the apple piece and made a funny face at him, he squeeled again and got me in the forehead with some toast.  
"**Ha-Ha. Yeah, that's uncle dumb dumb isn't it?""Peter, don't get me started."** I laughed.  
"**Now, keep those bad thoughts to yourselves. If anyone is going to teach him about you two, its going to be me."**

Breakfast was spent in silence for the most part, due to everyone being too hungry to make conversation.

When breakfast was just about completed, Bella had cleared her throat. **"So, Chuck.. Where's Caroline?"  
"She had a meeting with some lady about her flowers. Honestly, I didn't care much for it so I decided to get the hell out and join ya'll for breakfast.. Again, I do apologize for her, she really shouldn't get into ya'll's business. If it counts for anything, I think you are fantastic and I'm still wondering how you put up with that kid. God knows no one else can"** Chuck started laughing, absolutely killing himself.  
**"You don't need to apologize.. I wonder how he puts up with me though. I guess we were just meant to put up with each other."** We shared a look.

_Why don't we tell them now? You think so?_

__**"Yeah, the only two who could do so, 24/7." **Charlotte laughed. **"I'm kidding, Trust me. There isn't anything to put up with."**

I cleared my throat. The laughter had died down and Davey was mumbling quietly to himself, still flicking little bits of apple onto the ground.

**"I, uh.. Hoped to do this a little differently but ya'll are here and I guess this is going to be as perfect as it'll get."  
"What are you going on about?"  
****"I was thinking the same thing Dad."  
"Oh hush. Will you let Jasper get what he needs to say out loud? It's like you done forgot your manners.""Thanks Charlotte."  
**I stood up and walked around the table, grabbing Bella and putting my arm around her.**"I know we're missing Rose and Emmett but I honestly can't postpone telling you the happiness and excitement I feel, nothing can distract me from how I feel so.. I just wanted y'all to know that.. This morning.. I asked Bella to make an honest man out of me and be my beloved wife."  
"And I accepted." **Bella was absolutely beaming, we were just unbelievably happy. She lifted her hand and showed off her ring while blushing.

We were congratulated and bear hugs were going around like a bush fire, little davey shouted and cried over the onslaught of noise that erupted from the table, Peter being the loudest, Dad was crying.. Bella and Charlotte all but collapsed on the ground thanks to Bella grasping on my back and arm tightly.

**"What the hell is all the noise about?"**

_Oh Damn._

* * *

**_You know.. you must REVIEW to get another chapter!  
I KNOW I KNOW!  
_****_I'M NOT VERY NICE!  
LOL. SORRRRRY! _**


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